Disclaimer: Characters and locations belong to J.K.Rowling.

Warning: This story contains male/male sexual relationships as well as an older/younger relationship. If you don't like it, don't read it.

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Chapter 1

Remus Lupin knew it was wrong to have thoughts about one who was far younger than him. He knew that he was old enough to be his father. He knew that it was wrong to lust after a boy--no, a young man--who had once been his student. He knew it was wrong to want his best friends' son, his deceased lover's godson. He knew that it was wrong to desire the Boy Who Lived when it was he, and only he, who would end Voldemort's dark reign once and for all. He knew that it was wrong, and he yet he craved for the young man regardless.

In his thoughts, Harry Potter was foremost. In his dreams, Harry was his. Yet he knew that all those thoughts, wishes, wants, cravings, and desires were wasted.

Remus knew that Harry would never see him as more than just a friend, or a former teacher.

He wondered how long these feelings had flowed deep within his locked mind. Just recently the thoughts and feelings had surfaced, making it very hard to come anywhere near the young man without his mind--and his cock--going somewhere very personal. He could never admit these feelings to Harry, or anyone else for that matter. For if he did, he would surely regret it.

Why, he wondered. Was he afraid of rejection? Surely he was past that stage of life, having just passed his thirty-seventh birthday a mere three months before.

That was another reason Harry wouldn't be interested in him. He was more than twice his age, and Remus knew that as worn and tattered as he had looked when he was Harry's age, he was ten times worse now. Even so, the fact remained that he was falling for his best friend's son and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

He had tried when Tonks had admitted her feelings. They tried dating but it hadn't lasted two weeks when he told her he couldn't do it anymore. He explained that he harboured feelings for another that wouldn't allow him to think of anyone else, at least in the manner she wanted him to. She said she understood, but he hated himself for so obviously hurting her. For weeks after that, he noticed her watching him whenever he was near Harry, especially at Bill and Fleur's wedding. He vaguely wondered if she knew, and had ignored it from that point on, while hoping that she didn't.

Now, two weeks after the wedding, he sat in the kitchen of the Burrow, drinking a cup of tea as he listened to Bill and Charlie discussing the tactics of a minor-league Quidditch team that he couldn't recall. He was really only half listening, half his mind drifting to Harry's nearing departure, and so he was surprised when Charlie turned to him and asked his opinion on the matter of the team's use of a modernized version of the Wronski Feint.

"Hmm," he said clearing his throat, allowing himself time to recall the subject to his mind. "Well, I believe that the original is far more convenient."

Bill gave Charlie a grin that clearly said "I told you so". Remus grinned and continued.

"However, one cannot argue that the modern version is undoubtedly risky, and thrilling."

Charlie nodded. "That's what I say."

The two continued arguing on the subject, moving to the lounge, as Remus fell silent. Molly Weasley entered soon after followed by Tonks, whose gaze passed over him as she followed Molly to the bookcase of cookbooks.

"I don't remember if Harry likes German Chocolate cake or not," she was saying, and Remus's ears pricked forward at the mention of the young man. He opened his mouth to speak but just as he was about to answer, a wonderfully familiar voice reached his ear.

"He likes German Chocolate cake very much, Mrs. Weasley," Harry said, smiling. Remus watched him, followed by Ron and Hermione, enter the kitchen and he cleared his throat lightly, fixing his robes and crossing his legs. He knew it was better to be safe, rather than sorry. He wouldn't want wandering eyes to fall upon that, and wonder why he had a hard-on in their company.

Molly jumped slightly, glaring at her son as he laughed, before smiling at Harry. "Of course, I thought you did, dear. How will that be for your birthday?"

Harry frowned, glancing from her to Hermione and Ron, and then to Remus for a mere second before turning his attention back to Molly.

"Mrs. Weasley," he said softly, clearing his throat. It was evident to Remus that Harry had not gotround to telling her that he would be leaving next week. Remus had urged him to let her know when Harry had told him his plans to go after Severus and the Horcruxes. "I'll be leaving next week."

Molly's eyebrows rose comically and Remus bit his lip, deciding it wouldn't be wise to laugh at her demeanour in the present situation.

"Where are you going? School doesn't start for two months and you already said you weren't going to return."

Harry sighed. "I'm going after him and looking for the remaining Horcruxes," he said and raised a hand when she started to speak. "Don't try to stop me, Mrs. Weasley. I really like you a lot and I appreciate all you've done for me, but I want to do this and whether you want to or not, you can't stop me going."

Molly was red and her mouth opened and closed like a fish for a couple of moments before she finally turned to Remus, brows knitted together in anger.

"Remus! Don't tell me you agree with him! Tell him that he's making the wrong choice and needs to stay! He'll listen to you."

Remus blinked at her, surprised at her snapping at him. He sighed and shook his head.

"I'm sorry, Molly," he said. "I can't tell Harry what to do, and where to go or not go. He is of age and I am neither his father, nor his guardian. I am his friend, and I have already voiced my wish that he should not go, but it is his choice in the end and I can't deny him that. Nor do I think that you should try."

Molly's face whitened as if she'd been slapped by his words. Finally she turned her anger onto her son.

"There's no way that I'm letting you go with him!"

Ron's face grew as red as hers and soon he was yelling right back.

"I'm of age, Mum! You can't keep trying to protect me forever. Harry's my friend. I'm going to help him!"

Remus sighed. These fights were getting more and more frequent, and though it was expected with so many people living in the house, it was getting rather annoying. He stood up and made his way to where Harry stood by his friend, cringing a little each time Ron yelled. Remus tapped his shoulder and nodded at the front door as Harry looked at him. Harry smiled thankfully and they left the house just as Molly shouted for her husband's aid.

Shutting the door, Harry shook his head.

"I hate causing trouble for Ron, but that's all I seem to do," he said as he came to Remus's side.

"It's not your fault, Harry," he said, placing his hands in the pockets of his robes. The look on Harry's face in reply was one of disbelief. "No, it's not. Molly is naturally controlling, though don't tell her I said that."

He grinned and Harry laughed. The two walked in silence, heading down the path that led to the Weasley's orchard. Remus constantly took quick glances at the younger man, watching his expression. Harry always seemed so sad, though Remus knew he tried to hide it.

As they came to the orchard, Remus leaned against a tree as Harry took a seat on one of the stone benches near it, looking up at him.

"Remus," he said slowly. "Can I ask you something? Something a little weird?"

Remus raised a brow, wondering if the question had something to do with Harry's wanting to go after Severus or something else entirely. He nodded, a sincere smile on his face.

"Of course, Harry. You can always ask me anything you want."

Harry nodded, but stayed silent with his eyes cast down to his shoes. Finally Remus came to sit beside him, ignoring his closeness to the younger male for the moment. Then an idea dawned on him. "Is it about Sirius?"

Harry nodded. Remus sighed. He'd always wondered if Harry guessed that his and Sirius's relationship hadn't always been entirely platonic. "Sirius and I were lovers for a while. But we hadn't been for quite a long time."

Harry looked up at him, emerald orbs searching his for something. "You weren't with him before he died?"

Remus didn't know where this was headed, but answered in the negative. "We were last together when he was taken into Azkaban. We'd been dating. When we were reunited in your third year, the feelings were gone. Both his and mine."

Harry continued to gaze into his eyes for a while longer before he looked down at his shoes once more. Remus was concerned at the younger man's behaviour.

"Why do you ask, Harry?"

Harry looked up once more, a slight pink tinge on his cheeks. Before Remus knew what was happening, Harry leaned in and pressed his lips gently against the older man's. As if on instinct, Remus's eyes closed, and he pressed into the kiss before registering what was happening and pushing Harry away gently.

"Harry, you can't," he said, though his heart and his cock wanted very much for Harry to do that. "I'm too old, and you… you're confused."

Harry frowned.

"Am I, Remus?" he asked, his voice low. "Don't lie to me. You want this. You want me. I can see it in your eyes. And I want you. And I don't fucking care about your age or if you think there is someone out there better for me. You're the best thing there is for me, and you're here. I want you. I love you."

By this time, the younger man was on his feet, pressing his finger to Remus's chest. Remus listened to every word he said and wanted to believe it, needed to. But his conscience wouldn't let him.

"But Harry, I-"

"Stop listening to your fucking head for once, Remus," Harry practically yelled. "Listen to your heart. Maybe you'll realize that you need me too. I want you to love me, Remus. You can heal my pain. We can heal each other."

Remus looked searchingly into those dark green eyes, and finally he raised a hand to the younger man's cheek. Harry took the hand in his own, pulling it from his cheek before bringing it to his mouth, pressing his lips to the back of it. This little gesture caused his cock to respond, swiftly becoming aroused. He wrapped his fingers around Harry's hand and pulled the younger man closer.

"Alright, Harry," he whispered. "I'll heal you."

Harry smiled. "And I'll heal you."

Remus's other hand rose to grip Harry's chin, pulling his face down close to his. With a grin, he pressed his lips to the younger man's, throwing his conscience to the winds.