Luke Skywalker's lightsaber lessons
Chapter one
The gift
It was Christmas morning and Luke Skywalker had just fallen down the stairs from excitement. He had been hoping to get a lightsaber for two months.
"Merry Christmas Luke" said Darth Vader.
He was wearing a Santa's hat and a beard which made him look two hundred years old not thirty two.
"Can I have my present Daddy?" Said Luke with a trying to be cute face that usually meant he got his way.
"Oh fine then" Darth replied. "Earthlings use something called wrapping paper to cover the presents but I couldn't see why we should put paper with cute little puppy's on them round our presents".
Then he had a lightsaber in his hands which said
TO: LUKE
FROM:DADDY
Suddenly a wet patch formed around Luke's trousers.
"Luke" said Darth "Have you wet yourself again"?
"Maybe" Luke replied.
"Go to the toilet NOW" Darth said looking proud of his fine parenting skills. "And don't forget that Earthlings flush".
Now let me tell you that Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker were accidentally teleported to 10 Downing street and stayed there for three months now. R2-D2 and C3-P0 were teleported to a scrap yard in 50 pieces. The only reason they stay there is because David Cameron is too scared of Darth. Even though Luke has thrown bricks at the policeman so his hat would fall off. No wonder there's only 3 policemen left. He also took the number 1 off the door and wrote in white paint
MY DAD KNOWS 0 THINGS ABOUT BEING EVIL
This caused Luke to be grounded for 3 weeks.