So, I had this idea floating around in my head for a while. It turned into some kind of monster, and it's been re-written a couple times. Alternate outcomes of course. But I merged to two to make one big story. (Well, the biggest I've written thus far.) So if you would be so kind as to R&R, give some constructive criticism, and the like, please don't hesitate!

Stargate Atlantis, and all its glory do not belong to me, but I promise to put them back when I'm finished!

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Touch this, Colonel.

Touch that, Colonel.

John Sheppard had had enough. The whole situation felt like the first time he sat in the control chair. When they came through the space 'gate days ago, he knew exactly where to land; the Ancient technology drew him here. He made sure McKay would stay distracted by the power readings by keeping the HUD on, steering the 'jumper knowingly to the designated spot. The last thing he needed was the scientist's obsessive questions about his gene and how he knew certain things.

Now he stood in a pristine room, with ultra-smooth walls and control panels. It was just too bright, bringing everything into sharp focus. The whole place set his nerves on edge. His head was pounding, and for the first time in days, he was actually hungry. No. Check that. Starving. To top it all off, this temple or lab or outpost – or whatever the hell it was – sent a constant vibrating hum through him like a mild electrical shock. His fingertips were growing numb, and if he touched another gizmo, gadget, or console, Sheppard knew he would have to either leave right then or completely lose his temper. Maybe both.

"Colonel Sheppard? There's something here–"

"No!" Sheppard opted for the latter. Green eyes glinting dangerously in the dim light, he pointed a severe finger at the scientist. He nearly laughed at the expression on McKay's surprised face. Softening, the colonel lowered his hand awkwardly. "I need a break, Rodney." Sheppard said quietly as he moved quickly towards the exit.

Pursing his lips, the scientist lowered his eyes. "Oh. Mmm. Well. Fine. Could you make it quick–"

"McKay!" warned Sheppard, wavering towards the nearest wall to steady himself. A knot of tension formed between his shoulder blades as he turned slowly away from bright opening, anger flaring. "I am not some animal trained to do your bidding! Touch this, Colonel... Make the shiny stuff light up... Make the natives ooh and ahh over the freaky guy with a random gene! I'm telling you–"

Was it possible to feel the blood drain from your face? Sheppard slumped down to a bench that appeared seemingly out of nowhere, completely spent. Instead of spinning, the room did a crazy flip-flop, causing the colonel to close his eyes and grab the edge of the bench for support. Taking comfort in the coolness of the hard surface, Sheppard concentrated on breathing.

"Yes, yes, you need a– Huh. Would you look at that..." McKay said, his complaint replaced with curiosity as he examined the once-smooth wall. Crossing his arms tightly across his chest, he wondered about long-term exposure to the lab interacting with someone with a natural ATA gene. Evidently, it was effecting the commanding officer more than he had let on. Of course. Sighing, he retrieved his pack, rummaging around until he found a bottle of water. "Here. Why didn't you say something earlier?" McKay thought back to see if the colonel had actually said something, but to the best of his knowledge, he heard nothing of the sort.

Sheppard murmured his thanks, drinking deeply from the bottle. He leaned back against the cool wall with a sigh. The humming throbbed at the base of his skull, creating an itch that he couldn't scratch. Scrubbing his hands through his hair, he squinted up at McKay. "Do you hear that?"

"What?" The scientist studied the military officer at length. Sheppard's eyes were half-closed, and suddenly he looked more than pale. The colonel jumped at the slightest sound, squinting at the quick movement. "Sheppard?" Still no answer. "Look, if you're going to go crazy, do it on your own time. I've got work to do."

"Mmmm..." His eyes started to close again, but snapped open when McKay moved. Shifting uneasily on the bench, his breath quickened.

Something really is wrong. "Whoa, easy, Colonel." The scientist shrugged off his jacket, folding it neatly on the bench next to Sheppard. "Lie down," he said tersely. When Sheppard finally conceded, McKay placed a light hand on the pale man's shoulder, feeling a slight flinch. "Rest. I'll go back to the village for some food."

McKay's concern nearly overcame his ulterior motives; the bland dish the locals made for their last meal was exactly what he wanted. They also had a very strong tea that tasted suspiciously close to coffee with twice the caffeine. One last look at the man on the bench, McKay's brow furrowed. "What?"

Sheppard eyed him anxiously.

"Oh, don't look at me like that, Sheppard." McKay spread his hands, palms up. "Look, I apologize if I can't read your mind. Your telepathy obviously needs some polishing. Seriously, is it my fault you spread yourself too thin?"

Now the colonel did snort. "If you'd get your head out of that damned computer for a second--"

"Well, excuse me for working, Colonel Stoic, but this is what I'm here for!" At that, McKay clamped his mouth shut, his lips forming a straight, thin line. He had crossed his arms tightly around himself, as if preparing for a barrage of insults. Instead, McKay made the first move. "Now, be quiet until I get back." Turning on his heel, he left before Sheppard could say anything.

Twenty minutes later, McKay returned with a heavy wooden plate filled with food. After finding the colonel sleeping, he placed the plate next to Sheppard on the bench. As soon as the plate touched the bench, Sheppard sat bolt upright, wobbling just a little.

McKay took a step back. "You know, you really shouldn't wake up like that. Great. Now you're dizzy. Drink." If he wasn't going to take care of himself-- "What are you doing?"

Sheppard was rising unsteadily off the bench, panting. "I just... I just need to stand--" His head was ringing from the constant humming in the room. How could McKay not hear that?

"Sit." McKay gently pushed him back down.

"I am not a dog, Rodney!" The colonel said irritably, leaning back on the bench until his back touched the wall.

Thumb on chin, finger tapping nose, McKay stood appraising the pallid man. "Mmmm. I was thinking more of a petulant child, really, since you're acting like one." He now pointed to the plate of food. "Eat." Once again, he left before the colonel could say anything, returning to the mysterious console.

Sheppard smiled fondly at McKay's back. He knew the scientist meant well, even if he was abrasive about it. Reaching with a shaky hand, Sheppard drank from the water bottle, and poked at the food. The appetite he was so proud of earlier had dissipated somehow, but he finally took a bite regardless. Before he knew it, the plate was empty, the water was gone, and his eyes were closing of their own volition. Sheppard longed for nothing more than to be in his quarters asleep. For days.

"Sleep," McKay murmured, without turning to look at his withering friend.

Curling up in the hard bench, Sheppard dropped his head onto the make-shift pillow again. McKay's jacket smelled faintly of aftershave and peanut butter power bars; the colonel smiled a little before falling asleep. From far off, he heard his friend tsking and tapping at his keyboard. One of these days, that keyboard is gonna break, Sheppard thought.

Below the clacking sounds, the hum of the room intensified, sending a painful spike through the pilot's head. Then, just as suddenly as it came, it was gone. A sound like static filled his aching head as something connected with his mind. His body felt like a lead weight as his mind floated through the thick darkness. Although he couldn't see anything, he felt safe. His surroundings became lighter and lighter until things took shape.

Okay, so now I'm dreaming about the lab. And that console Rodney wanted me to touch earlier. Why?

Now he seemed to be standing over it, watching it light up, displays flickering here and there. From the display to his left, he saw Rodney walking determinedly through the courtyard to meet Teyla, who stood near a hut. From another screen, he saw Lieutenant Collins and two scientists emerge from the dense forest.

Moving his phantom hands over the console, a sensor array popped up. Suddenly, he knew exactly where he was the planet, and where that planet was in its solar system, and where in this galaxy that solar system was. The information was staggering, causing him to reel for a moment. Through this console, he could sense everything. If he listened carefully, he could hear every heart beating on the planet.

Tuning out the thump-thump of hearts, Sheppard observed his surroundings. His mind stretched across the planet like a giant piece of plastic wrap. This should hurt, right? The warm sun made him relax as the outpost fed him information. Weather, vegetation, wildlife. It was all here. Something like a beep echoed in his head.

:Your assistance is required:

Where?

:Proceed twenty-five degrees north; point five four kilometers:

Looky there.

What he saw was a small hut, near the center of the village. Moving quickly towards it, he paused, looking around him. Wait a minute. I'm not walking, am I? I'm floating! What the hell? Sheppard could have sworn he felt the ground beneath him, even heard his footfalls. But no one acknowledged his presence. Lorne was talking to one of the tall male villagers, who looked uncomfortable. The major must have said something funny, because the man suddenly threw his head back and laughed.

The villagers were kind, but a bit on the superstitious side. They told no stranger their names, and didn't really talk all that much. They were kind enough to let the explorers into their temple and precious forests to study them. For that, Sheppard was thankful. Not getting beat up or captured this time around was refreshing to one's soul. Particularly his; another visit to Beckett, and his name would be engraved on one of the exam beds.

As he drifted past Lorne, the entrance of the hut drew his mind inside, moving between floors and walls. Now he was in a control chair room, drifting around it. Instinctively, Sheppard reached out to it. The chair was cold in his non-corporeal hands; around him, he could feel the air stirring. Convincing himself he had to sit in the chair, he slid over it not unlike silky fabric. The chair activated, and he saw something he never wanted to see for these people. If he had a physical body, he would have screamed.

Wraith!

He's gonna be pissed.

McKay carefully pulled the comm from the colonel's ear. The man needs to sleep, or a very important astrophysicist will be missing his head, he mused. For once, Sheppard didn't flinch. Just as he placed it on the bench, a crackle of static came loudly over the radio. "Colonel Sheppard? This is Teyla. Come in."

Moving away from the sleeping form, McKay tapped his comm. "Yes. Teyla. This is Doctor McKay. The colonel is indisposed at the moment. Anything I can help you with?"

"Hello, Doctor McKay. There is something that you would be quite interested in seeing. The villagers have a hut that stands near the edge of the courtyard. Please meet me there."

A quiet groan escaped the colonel's lips, and his breathing picked up again.

Frowning, McKay glanced over at the wan man on the bench. He didn't want to leave Sheppard alone, but there were things that had to be done. "Yes, yes. I've seen it. I'll be right there." Snatching up his interface tablet from the console, he took one last look and exited the room.