Chapter 1
It all started with a warm summer breeze, where a duelist by the name of Johnathan who aspired to be like Joey Wheeler was walking through his nonexistent school. Unfortunately Joey Wheeler was an alias as the real identity of this great dueler was a guy who likes cats named Steve. Steve liked his wonderful fan almost too an obsession where he was a fan of his own fan. They both had posters of each other, while one was normally distributed through stores one the other one was distributed from random stalking agencies. During this day they stalked each other and ran around in circles and eventually ran into each other. Incidentally when they crashed their lips also crashed each other. This soon causes their faces to become like cherries as they were both red. Soon both of them thought of each other's cherries. Jonathan proceeded to say sorry for crashing into him and stand up while holding his hand up offering to help Steve up.
"Sorry, here let me help you" Jonathan apologizes.
"Its alright, thanks" Steve accepts the hand.
"Hey, are you Joey?! I'm your biggest fan!" Jonathan excitedly asks.
"I sure am! Handsomest man full time, and best duelist in the world full time as well, thanks for your support, never could be the best without guys like you!" Steve
"U-um, yeah, I could never live without you, if you get what I mean" Jonathan blushingly said.
"O-oh, really? You want to come to my hotel room and have a duel with me?" Steve shocked by the assertive statement continues the conversation.
"S-sure! I'd love to, I mostly main face hunter!" Jonathan confusing Steve.
"Um, I think that's Hearthstone, but whatever come on." Steve urges.
"Y-you're right, I'll give you my slim jim as thanks, if you win the game of course" Jonathan arrogantly states.
"If you win, I'll give you my beef jerky" Steve backfires.
Mistakenly these two didn't understand the other's euphemisms, but both are striving to win so that they can obtain each other's "blunt knife"
10 Minutes Later at the Duelist's Hotel
"I HAVE LETHAL!" Jonathan excitedly shouts
"No you shall not have my HARD AWP!" Steve finally understanding the metaphor.
"Oh I will have at your Banana come up your B bombsite!" Jonathan proceeds to exemplify his expertise in CSGO.
"Well, take this, I activate my trap card "Dragon's Bite" on your Flame Swordsman!" frustratingly shouted by Jonathan
"Well, too bad YOU'RE THROWING THIS GAME! You activated my trap card" Steve profusely says while unzipping his pants.
"W-w-what are you doing?!" Jonathan looks away and closes his eyes.
Meanwhile Steve using his "trap card" proceeds to move some cards while Jonathan isn't looking.
"I'm just messing with you!" Steve laughs.
"But this part isn't, let's make this interesting, where loser goes to the shadow realm." Steve proposes.
"Isn't that where you die?" Jonathan questions.
"Unlike how it was televised during the duelist kingdom era, it is actually a realm where you are forced by the winner to give them your 'rare card' and go back into your worst nightmare like going back to 'school days'." Steve explains.
"F-fine, you will not have my 'rare card' though, since I will win. Jonathan replies nervously due to his realization of the metaphor used.
"I activate my trap card! THORN BIND HOSTAGE!" Steve proceeds to use his 'misplaced' card.
"I activate my trap card! ANCHOR HOWL!" Jonathan backfires.
"STAAAAAAHHHHHP" an unknown voice yells.
This voice came from the door to their room which was now open. The person standing there with his odd haircut and his brain which was just like his third leg, small and disappointing. This person was of course known as Tristan, but in all actuality was a sexually confused guy named "Brain". Although his name being ironic, was rather quite intelligent when it came to sexual tension and failed intercourse.
"Brain?! What are you doing here?!" Steve surprisingly questions.
"I'M HERE TO SMACK YOU WITH MY LIMP FISH! OBVIOUSLY NOT YOU IDIOT, I'M HERE TO STOP THIS MONSTROSITY BEFORE YOU PROCEED TO CREATE ONE!" Brain proceeds to yell.
Steve proceeds to push Brain out and argue.
"GET OUT, GO MAKE OUT WITH YUGI OR ROLLIN OR WHATEVER HIS NAME IS" Steve urges.
"I-i-it's not like I want to go copulate with him or anything!" Brain tomato red blushingly says.
"B-b-but I guess I can rush his B bombsite with banana" Brain proceeds to delve into his delusions.
"What's this about rushing my B bombsite?" Rollin who happens to be there as well.
"N-N-N-N-N-N-NOTHING! J-j-j-just that I want to put my…" Brain continues to become smaller than his own "tentacle".
"Don't make me come at you" Rollin angrily taunts.
" You can come in me anytime" Steve proceeds to flirt.
" H-hey, Steve he's mine, d-don't make me break your penis!" Brain unknowingly argues.
"The penis isn't a bone dummy" Jonathan begins to explain.
"J-just because you're correct doesn't mean you're right!" Brain argues.
"People die when they're killed" Rollin proceeds to mock Brain.
"So I'm giving my 'p250 asiimov' through trading of certain 'firepower' to Brain" Rollin clarifies.
"Yep, and I'm giving Jonathan my 'toothbrush experience' with my floppy dorito. Steve proceeds to finish off the clarification.
"Ok, guess Brain is the foreigner invading from New Mexico while Rollin is Trump trying to make a wall to block his 'invasion' and making anus' great again." Jonathan proceeds to surprisingly tell the truth.
"I'll start to to administer emergency penis rations to Jonathan using brute force and that will be it" Steve clarifies.
"It's not strength it's skill" Jonathan smirks whilst blushing fire truck red.
10 minutes later after some penis wars
"PREPARE YOURSELF FOR I SHALL SHOW YOU MY LITTLE TOMODA" Steve brazenly shows off his magnum.
"TOMODA! HE PEAKED!" Jonathan blushing more red than the red sea that followed after the rushing of his B bombsite.
"I'm curious! ARE YOU KIDDING ME! TOMODA HOW MUCH ARE YOU GOING TO PEAK OUT OF HIS PANTS!" Jonathan screaming like a certain caster.
"LET ME SHOW YOU MY KUNAI WITH CHAINS!" Steve announces as he finally creates a Nudesto Beach in his nether regions.
"Oh yeah?! TAKE THIS UNLEASH THE HOUNDS!" Jonathan unzipping his pants and unleashing nothing more than a worm.
Meanwhile in the adjacent room over…
"10% strength, 20% thrust, 50% concentrated power of the penis, fifty percent pleasure, and 100% hard" Brain starts to sing with some edited lyrics.
"LOOKS LIKE WE NEED A BIGGER DRILL!" Rollin assumes the position using 'spiral power' to inflate his drill.
"CASTLE OF STONE!" Brain casts.
"THAT'S NOT A CASTLE! IT'S A TOWER!" Rollin retorts.
On the roof above the two rooms
While they engage in their 'penmanship' duel and the other two are engaging in the most sexual duel ever there was one person who was disgusted and unhappy by these pairings. This person was of course Bakura. Like the others in the gang, Bakura was an alias for a guy named Jeff. Jeff although completely normal to the outside world, was the outcast in the gang for actually being in a relationship and interested in the other sex. Bakura was obviously in a relationship with Tea whom was surprisingly not under an alias. Unfortunately just like Tristan everyone else in the group pronounced it like the stuff they drink that wasn't bodily fluids exiting through their nether regions. Bakura was devising a plan while puking at the loud shouts exiting from both of the rooms below which he unfortunately heard.