a/n: Any constructive criticism welcome. First fanficiton in a long, long while. I hope you all enjoy. Title comes from the song by Keane which was a huge inspiration for this fic.
His eyes caught sight of her far in the distance walking with Lori and Carl.
A basket of laundry gripped tightly in her hands as she nodded to Lori who chatted to her the woman's hands often reaching out the hold onto Carl's shoulder affectionately.
Carol's eyes would linger on the hand.
She looked blank he noticed with a frown, she wasn't the same woman who'd smile to herself wandering around camp any more. Any smile or expression she gave didn't meet her eyes they always had a lingering look of sadness in them, She put on a show for the entire world.
One of strength, One of moving on but he often caught her staring at the ragged doll hopelessly. Her thin hands twisted it with nervous energy, often bringing it up to inhale deeply trying to catch any trace of her little girl.
The last day at Hershel's did more to break her than years with Ed ever could.
He looked away from her quickly and down at the one arrow he had left as his hands fidgeted with the thing stabbing a hole in the thigh of his jeans.
Sometimes he wishes he could rip that doll from her and hide it far away stop reminding of how he failed. He knows Sophia never really had a chance somewhere deep down but he couldn't face up to that realization just yet.
Probably never will.
He wonders how she looks at him now, the only one of they're little family who gave him a proper chance now feels like a stranger to him.
A deep voice whispers consiprationally in his ear.
"You better stop pining over her." It hisses. He politely tells it to shut up. "You know you aint nothing to her." It laughs cruelly. Daryl snarls muttering something he's not sure he can make out himself as it laughs.
"What did you just say to me?" Her voice sounded Surprised, He jumps up to stand pulling the arrow out and wondering how the hell she got to close so fast.
"What are you talking about I didn't say nothing to you." He growls eyes narrowing in suspicion.
"You sure?" She raises an eyebrow but he knows she doesn't really care any more.
He just grunt stomping off into the opposite direction. Picking up his crossbow and announcing to rick he's going hunting. Carol looks after him giving a sigh, She looks up at the clothes line placing the basket in his previously occupied seat and carries on her daily tasks.
She's sitting in the camper staring into a book blankly eyes not following the page when he comes back after hunting.
"How'd it go?" Dale asks conversationally, following the red neck in. He knows they won't starve without this one hunt but it's been tense around camp and he's desperately trying to keep everyone together and spirits lifted.
"Have some good eatin' tonight." He says voice coarser than usual, It makes her look up worriedly.
His eyes are red and his knuckles are too bruised for just squirrel hunting.
"What happened to your hand?" She asks looking back down at the book.
"Walker." He says offhandedly shrugging the question off, dropping his crossbow on the table.
She frowns at his tone but says no more. As he passes to the bathroom he casts a glance at the book in her hands he notices the rose he'd given her pressed flat against the page. He doesn't know what to make of that and so says nothing.
Dale feels the tension and moves to sit across form her hands reaching out to grasp the table as he looks up at her with wide curious eyes.
"What's going on with you two?" He whispers, She smiles slightly at his nosey nature.
"Nothing going on we're just.." She stops not entirely sure what to say, Once he had been her lifeline but now she thought about it she notices the distance between the two.
The older man opened his mouth but stopped as the bathroom door opened abruptly. They both look up at Daryl, who in return isn't quite sure why he's getting such odd looks.
"What?" He asked irritated. They both say nothing dale getting up making an excuse about taking over watch again. Daryl watches the man's back turning to face Carol eyes narrowed.
"Mind telling me what that was bout?" He asks gruffly leaning back against the counter.
"Nothing. Dale just asked if I was okay." She lies finally turning the page not looking up at him.
"And?" his voice is unsure and gentle he offers her a smile when she looks up.
"I'm fine Daryl." Her smile doesn't reach her eyes and he's getting annoyed at the face she puts on, he's getting more annoyed that he's the only one who apparently cares.
"That is bullshit." He along with his patiences snaps. "You aint fooling no one." His voice starts to rise, and she's slightly intimidated.
"What do you expect? I lost my little girl. I lost her." Her voice quivers and the books drops the the table as she grabs at her hairs hands running through the short strands. "She's gone. I have nothing left, Is that what you wanted to hear?" Her blues eyes are large and wet and Daryl isn't sure why he wanted her to stop pretending any more.
The grey haired woman gets up to move past him but he catches her wrist in a gentle but firm grip.
He licked his lips slightly opening his mouth to say something when she pushed forward pressing her mouth to his. Leaning into his body she pressed her chest to his. The kiss was desperate and awkward and Daryl's brain practically exploded with the entire thing. He pushes her back she stumbles and falls back into her seat he goes stumbles slightly towering over her crumbled body.
"The fuck?" He grunts as he pushes himself up and practically throws himself out of the camper.
Carol shakes as she sits, she knows she has to get started on dinner but can't find the strength to get up. Horror of what she had just done came to her. What must he think of her. She chokes, a hand coming up to her mouth she bites down on her knuckle a sob bubbling to the surface.
That's how Andrea finds her, curled in on herself blubbering sitting in the booth.
The young woman tries to calm her, kneeling before her and hushing her gently. She's trying to be patient as she holds Carol's hand tightly.
She must be as fed up with the useless old cow as everyone else is Carol thinks bitterly.
He paces like a cage animal a few yards from camp. He's confused and he's doesn't feel like he's ready for what had just happened. Eye's are on him he can feel the burning glare of Shane and Dale but he continues to pace. He kicks at the ground occasionally.
"You know that meant nothing, baby brother." The voice is back and he stops pushing the balls of his hands into his eyes. His breath is ragged he can't be doing with the mocking anyone. Couching on the ground like that he must look insane but he doesn't care. "She's desperate, if it wasn't you it'd be Shane. Hey, maybe he'll give her a good seeing too." He feels queasy at that last taunt, anger bubbles in his gut.
"Shut up." he grunts again trying to banish Merle from his brain. "Just shut up."
"What's the matter? Don't tell me you got feelin's for that hussy now." The hiss is low and dangerous. "Giving up on your own flesh and blood so you can chase some tail?"
He stands shaking his head to himself, his hands coil into fists practically shaking. Once the voice goes quiet again he heads back to camp. His posture is tense, he's frustrated and he needs a release. A sick smile comes to his face as he purposely heads to Shane walking past the dangerous man, Daryl bumps his shoulder into Shane's.
Carol stays with her for awhile. Whispering gentle encouragements to her as she holds her hands. Carol looks up at her with gratitude in her eyes. The blonde grins happy to see her calmer, happy to know she's helped her in some small, tiny way.
The argument outside is loud and they're both surprised to see Rick pushing himself inbetween Shane and Daryl.
"What is all this?" Andrea asks Lori who shrugs holding Carl close to her.
"I don't know they just started going at each other." She rolls her eyes.
Carol moves out of the RV to help break up the fight in some way. She's stopped by Andrea who catches her by the shoulder.
"Best not get in the way." Lori Supplies the explanation for Andrea.
Carol nods slightly wringing her hands around each other.
The three men finally tare them apart, Rick ordering to separate parts of the camp. Daryl stalks of to sit by the fire immediately giving a strange glance to carol as he left. Shane although stood there jaw jutting out stubbornly, they stared at each other for a moment before Shane too stalked off, although to his tent. Carol and Lori walk to the fire checking on the large thick stew in the pot.
They call everybody for dinner just as the sun starts to set.
Dales eyes scan the area, trying to desperately keep a good look out in the poor sight seeing conditions of the murky night. He hears watches silently as Carol leaves her tent. He's scared at this unusual behavior, but his panic is calmed when she stops short of leaving the camp and starts to unzip the small tent just slightly out of the way. His interest is peaked, as the door is ripped open by a sleep deprived Daryl Dixon who begrudgingly lets her inside. The tent is quickly sealed again and he sees a lantern being turned on. They're shadows make a very interesting display. Looking the other way he decides not to listen in and checks his watch humming to himself contentedly.
"I wanted to apologise." She starts, kneeling on the floor of his tent just by his feet.
Daryl is sitting up and staring at her unsure, arm leaning on a propped up knee. His eyes narrow somewhat as she talks as if he can't fully comprehend her words.
"It was.. inappropriate of me... I...I shouldn't have." She looks just about anywhere but him.
He clears his throat and nods staring at her through the dull light.
"I'll just get out of your hair." She murmurs and moves to leave.
It's then that any restraint Daryl Dixon had for the women broke, She looked so lost and dejected. It stung him to see her look that way. And far the second time that day he reach out and grabbed a hold of her wrist. She turns looking at him, He hates to admit it but he notices fear there.
"Daryl?" She whispers not knowing what he was doing as he moved both of them closer.
He pushes forward.
Lips covering hers in a gentle kiss.
She's shocked but starts to return the kiss shuffling awkwardly with the blankets and clutter in his tent and places a hand on his thigh. His hand moves underneath the hem of her top rough hands rubbing against soft flesh. Carol pulls back slightly. She's surprised by the move and breaks the kiss.
"You okay?" He murmured hands on her hips.
"Yeah just surprised me is all." She nods gently, voice quivering slightly as she breaths.
She's probably just looking for comfort tonight but that doesn't stop him from kissing her cheek sweetly before moving to return back to his previous goal of lifting her top up over her head.
This time he succeeds and he tosses the worn material over into a corner.
He's new to this and his hands are shaking when he pulls her top top of him. She wasn't wearing a bra- part of him thanks god for that- and he can't stop staring at the gorgeous freckle covered skin of her chest. He notices that she's shaking slightly too and it makes him feel less pathetic.
Catching her mouth in another kiss before moving down her neck a hand slowly coming up and cupping her chest, he's clumsy and he's not sure what to do he tries to pinch her nipple but that makes her bend away from him and he must done something wrong when she asks gently
"Have you done this before?" Her gentle tone isn't insulting but it sure hurts like hell.
"Course I have." He grunts but makes a mental note to be more careful. She laughs softly her hand coming under his wife beater and removing it for him.
Her hands smooth over his chest as they kiss.
And he can feel himself get more excited by the minute. He's pressing against her bottom and there part of him that's worried she can feel it. His hand glide up her back bringing her towards his mouth as she kisses her chest worshiping the skin. He looks up at her for conformation before taking one of her nipples into his mouth. She moans slightly hips rolling into his and arms wrapping around his neck. He smiles leaning down further and kissing all over the soft mound of flesh moving to the other and repeating the process.
His hands go to her trousers and she looks down following his lead and undressing until she's naked, kneeling before him.
He pushes his trousers down, reaching down and rubbing his erect member as he stares. Carol's face and chest redden at the look, soon he kneels in front of her also pushing her onto her back the red neck crawls over her.
Looking down he tries to memorise everything.
She lays flat of the ground, large blue eyes meeting brown she give shim a tiny smile which he returns.
She takes one of his hands intertwining the fingers as he lowers himself.
His face is buried into her bosom as he sinks himself into her cautiously. She cries out his name. Her free hand tangles itself in his mop of dark hair. He grunts taking a moment to get used to the sensation of being inside a woman. The urge to orgasm is approaching all to fast and he's terrified of making a fool out of himself as he begins to move his hips.
Carol winces, his thrusts are awkward and his other hand that is pressing her back flush against him scratches her and his fingers are digging in to tightly.
Breathy moans come forth as he's now reaching that place within her.
His moans are louder than hers but he doesn't say anything unlike herself who continuously whispers his name. Her legs wrap around his hips. Toes curling ever so slightly.
Daryl's hips push forward faster he's trying desperately to hold on but all the soon he feels himself release within her. He lets out a loud groan face hidden in her neck as he collapses on top of her.
Hand still tightly holding onto hers.
Carol smiles burying her nose in the top of his head inhaling deeply.
He reaches out one handedly to gab a blanket to cover the two of them with as he pulls out or her. He doesn't know how he can actually look at her face after lasting all but 4 minutes but she moves his chin up to meet her eyes.
"The was lovely." She said gently, he looks away from her nodding. He lays his head on her chest listening in the the gentle rhythm of her heart. She runs her hands through sweat dampened hair as she basks in the heat surrounding her.
And it's how they're found in the morning by Lori.
Daryl curled protectively over Carol in his sleep and carol finally looking the most content she had been in weeks since the last day at Hershel's farm.