I'd done so many things wrong.

It started when I was a child. I treated my only freinds like dirt and treated the people who never really cared about me like they were the whole world.

Reno, Rude, Aeris, Biya....I'm so sorry.

Then I made the greatest mistake of my life. The one that would change my world and kill my heart. I left Aeris and joined the Turks. I still came to visit my friends in the slums...but it wasn't the same. We couldn't walk down the street without people hurrying their children inside and giving me a blood thirsty look. I was a Turk. Their enemy.

Reno disapeared for awhile and Rude joined the Turks with me. Aeris stayed with her church and Biya continued her street life.

Rude and I were two among the three rookie Turks. Our leader, Chris was not the nicest guy I ever met. He was cruel to anyone who crossed him. But then again he had been a Turk for eighteen years.

Thats what Shinra does to you.

He was always ranting about some man, some famous Turk named Vincent Valentine. Said that he was the best Turk there ever was and ever would be. The man had a ruthless heart. I remember asking him what happened to this famous Valentine. Chris's face had paled and he whispered: " He crossed Professor Hojo."

I had been a Turk for a year when I got the news. Biya died.

She wasn't having a big fancy funeral like she deserved mainly because she didn't have enough money. Even I, the infamous Turk didn't have enough. I was living on whatever Shinra gave me which was usually just enough to make it through a week. But I decided to suffer. One of my closest friends had died. I pitched in as much as I could as did Aeris and Rude. We never heard from Reno.

Her funeral was on a Saturday. I remember it was raining. Rude, Aeris and I stood there in front of the grave each remembering our past with her. I whispered a prayer that my mother had taught me when I was two. And I remember before leaving I read her epitaph. I'll always remember it.

For a heart so golden
You got what you did not deserve
In Heaven you shall rest
Before spreading your beautiful wings
To fly

When I was eighteen, Chris died and I was given the position of leader. The other Turk was killed in an accident two months afterwards. Now it was just Rude and I. They brought us cantidates from SOLDIER that they believed may be able to handle the role of a Turk.

There was no one that Rude or I could agree on either because they were so innocent or because they just didn't fit the catergories.

Until the last one.

" Carter Miller," Rude read. The boy stepped in. He was about my height with messy hair that was obviously dyed black. I couldn't tell what color it had originally been though. The boy had greenish eyes that were alight with excitment. His eyes faltered though, when he saw Rude and I.

I handed his a small handgun. " Hit the target," I said shortly.

The boy laughed. " Man, Tsengy, you've gotton harsh." Then he raised the gun and shot four times at the target. I raised an eyebrow at him as Rude ran to get the target. He brought it back and handed it to me. I raised my eyebrows in shock.

All bullseyes.

The boy laughed again. " Don't you recognize me, Tsengy? Rudie?"

Rude stared at the boy for a moment then laughed. " Sorry, man, you had red hair last time I saw you."

" Damn," the boy said. " I forgot I dyed my hair."

" Reno!" I cried.

" Finally," Reno muttered. Rude looked at our old friend's files.

" Reno," Rude said. " It says here that your nineteen."

" That's odd," Reno had said innocently.

Reno became our third Turk and a girl named Jem, became our fourth.

Then I turned twent-two. On my birthday, things went all to hell. Jem died in Reactor that was blown up by a rebel group called Avalanche. The next day, our old home was destroyed by the falling of a Plate, I slapped Aeris in front of her friends because it was my job, Reno was seriously maimed and President Shinra was killed leaving everything to his ninteen year old son, Rufus.

Aeris escaped and I thank Shiva for that.

Now I'm lying in the Temple of Ancients and I'm regreting all of the things I did or never did. They say when a man is dying, his life passes before his eyes. I think it already has.

Elena...

" Tseng what's this? Can we find the Promised Land with it?"

"...I wonder. Anyway we have to report to the President about this."

" Be careful, Tseng."

" Yeah...Hey Elena, how about dinner after this job is over."

"Th...thank you very much. If I may be excused....

Aeris...

" Tseng!"

" Hi Aeris!"

" I'm going to the playground, wanna come?."

" Yeah...I should come to protect you, because it can be dangerous getting there."

" My hero..."

Reno...Rude...

" Hey big boss! Whats up?"

" Reno...you are a loyal Turk right?"

" Loyalist ya got...except for Rude...'cause he doesn't talk."

" I heard that!"

" Reno I'm serious."

" Whats wrong?"

"....We have to destroy Sector Seven."

"......"

" Reno?"

" ....Yes sir."

Biya....I'd like to think that I was coming to join you in Heaven but...you were such a good person and I am a monster that does whatever he is told.

Maybe-!

There are footsteps outside! Maybe someone is coming to help me!

" Hey it's Tseng!"

Oh Shiva, no....Aeris....

I look up and see her emerald eyes peering down at me cautiously. I have betrayed her too many times now. Now she is wary.

" Tseng of the Turks?"

Cloud, Cloud is here too. Hey Chris, Vincent Valentine is here too.

I have nothing to lose.

" Ugh..." It's harder to speak then I anticipated. " I've been had. It's not the Promised Land that Sephiroth is after...."

" Sephiroth is inside?!"

" Look for yourself," I whisper. " Damn..." I wince as pain floods through every vain of my body.
" Letting Aeris go was the start of my bad luck...the president was...wrong..."I murmur of myself. Oh, Shiva, the pain is beyond words.

" No!" Aeris yelled. " You're wrong! The Promised Land isn't like you imagined." She turned her back to me. The pain in my heart mathes my physical pain. " And I'm not going to help. Either way there was no way that Shinra could have won."

" ....Pretty harsh," I whisper. Do you remember when we were kids, Aeris? Do you remember sliding down the icy banisters in te winter? " Sounds like something...you'd say..." Using the altar behind me and wrapping one arm around my wounded stomach and struggled foward towards Cloud. " The Keystone...place it on...altar...." I don't know if my words come out coherent but I stumbled off of the platform and out of their way. Blood is soaking my clothes and nobody cares.

Through half opened eyes I watch Cloud go over to Aeris. She's like a sister to me. " Are you crying?" Cloud asks her.

" Tseng's with our enemy, the Turks, but I've known him since we were little...there's not a lot of people I can say that about. In fact there's probably only a handful of people in the world who really know me."

I'm glad you remember, Aeris.

Cloud, Aeris and Vincent walk to the platform and sink into the floor.

" Aeris...Elena....Rude....Reno...I'm so sorry."