A Dickful Wonder
Relationships NaruSai/SaiNaru
Rating: M (just in case)
A.N: For Sai and his impeccable naming skills.
"I don't understand".
Sai's look of utter confusion would have been really adorable if the matter in question didn't involve my penis. I tried my best to keep my cool.
"Look here babe. I really appreciate you, um, for making it factually correct. But can't you just call me something else? You know, like Ramen-kun or something?"
Sai's perplexity didn't seem to abate.
"But you used to complain before that it wasn't true. Now it is. What's the problem? You don't mind when Ugly waxes poetic about Hinata-san's ample bosom. I really don't get it. Only women are allowed to be vocal about their lover's bodies? It is very..."
Sai scrunched up his face.
"Sexist. Yes."
I badly wanted to wipe that annoying self congratulatory expression off of his face. It eerily looked like a replica of Bastard's smug-ass face. Even more than usual. Ugh.
With long suffering patience(can you see me Baachan?) I went on to explain that Sakura-chan didn't call Hinata-chan Opal-eyed Booby or something like that in front of others. As for our little conversations about our respective partner's... ah... assets, it was private. The prerogative of best friends.
Sai responded with his faux smile.
When Sakura-chan found me later slurping my woes away, she patted my head.
"So...he's still sticking with 'Dickful'?"
"Yup."
A.N: It's always made me snort how Sai bestows his delightful little nicknames on people. If the names are just the opposite of what Sai actually feels, then Naruto's nickname should be a compliment, yeah? Not to mention how gayer that makes the artist nin. One can't but wonder if Kishi is a violently repressed fella... Deconstruction, people. It's all about deconstruction.