A/N: Here we are. I thought of this when rereading the part of the manga where the Queen mentions wishing Ciel could make Christmas pudding with her and Albert. So I came up with this. Completely pointless, but fairly cute, yes? I would make it my Christmas fic this year, but I had already come up with something and it changed into this instead.

Title: Of a Messy Mixture that Passes for Cookies

Author: liketolaugh

Rating: K

Pairings: Queen Victoria/Prince Albert

Genre: Friendship/Family

Warnings: Pre-series, historical inconsistencies (Albert died fourteen years before Ciel was born)

Summary: Out of all the nobles' children, Ciel was Queen Victoria's favorite. He was the first one and the only one that she invited to make cookies with her and Albert. Or: Seven-year-old Ciel makes cookies with Queen Victoria and Prince Albert.

Disclaimer: Sadly, Black Butler is not mine.

Ciel smiled up at the two adults with him sheepishly, blushing. Victoria laughed and Albert chuckled at his slightly flour-dusted face.

"That's fine, my boy," assured Victoria, bending to pick up the bag of flour that the extremely undersized Ciel had only managed to carry halfway from the cupboard. "I suppose it is a bit heavy for a boy as small as you."

Ciel pouted at her. "I'm not that small!" he protested.

"No," teased Albert. "You're smaller!"

Ciel made a face at him and Albert ruffled his hair before going to get the rest of the ingredients.

"Here, Ciel, I'll measure out the ingredients and you may mix them, is that all right, Ciel?" consoled Victoria, still chuckling.

Ciel, smile already back on his face, nodded enthusiastically, lifting up his hands for the mixing bowl she passed down to him and setting it on the special table-stool that one of the servants had brought in. Sadly, the high counters were above his head. Oh, how he hated being small!

One by one, Victoria measured out the ingredients Albert brought over, adding the different spices one at a time. Ciel mixed them in quickly.

He jumped as he felt something be dropped on his head. It broke and something cold and slimy dripped down the back of his head. His eyes widened and he put his hand to the back of his head, and when he pulled it back, it came away with something thick and clear on it. He looked over his shoulder to see Albert smirking at him, snickering and only holding one of the two eggs called for in the recipe.

"Oops," the man said innocently, not fooling anyone. "I dropped an egg."

Ciel gave him a bright smile that instantly made the man wary. "That's all right," he said cheerfully, turning back to the mixture as Victoria mock-scolded her husband, who pretended to look chastised. When neither of them were looking, he abandoned the mixture and darted to the cupboard, where he grabbed one of the few things he could reach and lift. A pepper shaker. He opened it and hid it in his pocket, darting back to his bowl before either of the adults could miss him.

Finally, Victoria added the last ingredient just as Albert began to mix together the wet ingredients. Ciel stirred it together quickly and announced, "I finished!" He quickly put his hands in his pocket and dumped a little pepper into his hand.

Albert leaned over to look into the bowl and smiled. "Oh, goo-"

Ciel threw the small handful of pepper at his face, aiming for his nose and mouth.

Albert instantly straightened up, alarmed. He made faces at the taste of pepper and Ciel waited, giggling. One second. Two.

Albert sneezed violently. "Ciel!" he protested, then sneezed again.

Victoria laughed. "Oh, you did so deserve that, Albert. Did you think that Ciel wouldn't retaliate?"

"I'm never taking my eyes off that brat again," Albert grumbled. "Where on earth did he get pepper?" He sneezed.

Ciel returned the pepper to its place quietly.

"From the cupboard, I'd imagine," Victoria replied dryly. Then she waggled her finger at Ciel and mock-scolded, "And you, my boy, should not throw pepper at my husband's face, even if he did throw an egg at you!"

Ciel gave her a pitiful face, and it lasted less than five seconds before they both gave up their acts to burst out laughing. Albert just grumbled, giving Ciel a suspicious look before continuing in his task of mixing up the wet ingredients. Then Victoria claimed both bowls and mixed them together, back turned. Ciel gave Albert a hopeful look, pointing at the bowls of nuts and raisins. After a moment, Albert grinned, eyes sparkling with mischief.

A moment later, Victoria cried out as she was pelted by handfuls of nuts and raisins. Then, slowly, she put down the bowl and turned around.

Ciel hid behind Albert. His fear proved to be justified a moment later when Albert had to duck a spoonful of butter.

What resulted was a five minute chase and a lot of spilled butter. Ciel finally slipped on a particularly large glob and fell on his stomach, and both Victoria and Albert set upon him, tickling him mercilessly.

"Stop!" Ciel choked out between laughs. "Stop!"

A few minutes later, they both did, all three of them breathless with laughter.

"Look at you!" chided Victoria. "You're a mess, dear boy!" She glanced at Albert. "Both of you!" she added. "Go clean up right now!"

"But we have to finish the cookies!" protested Ciel.

"Nonsense," dismissed Victoria. "The mixing is done and now I can just ask John to finish it up. By the time we actually manage to get all of us clean they'll probably be finished."

"But Victoria!" Albert and Ciel both protested.

"Now," she said firmly.

Both pouted and slunk off to clean up.

Hours later, Victoria's prediction proved to be correct; by the time all three of them were presentable again, John had just set the first plate of cookies on the table, which they set upon with much laughter and teasing and milk.

Ciel did so love making cookies with the Queen and her consort.

I feel embarrassed. I put more effort into being historically accurate with the cookies than with Albert... though to be fair, I really couldn't involve Albert and still be historically accurate, and his Wiki description really caught my imagination. The cookies, by the way, are called Hermits, which apparently were a big hit in the 1880s, which was before chocolate chip cookies were invented. Please review!