Numbuh 707 (otherwise known as 'Jamie' Jasmine Bond) was having a very bad day. And it started so well…
The alarm clock shrieked in the early hours of the morning, snapping her out of fairly pleasant dream but Jamie wasn't resentful of this, after all no day was a chore when you had things like the KND Labs to look forward to. She sprung from her bed, and jogged over to her closet. Unlike most of her fellow operatives Jamie's closet (and room) were both very neat, a result of an agreement established between the girl and her parents – i.e. they extended Jamie's curfew if she kept it neat (but not too neat, a kid's got to have standards after all). Jamie was fairly certain they thought her outfits were part of 'phase' she'd grow out of. Unlikely given it was a deliberate choice not a flight of fancy.
Jamie shrugged off her fluffy pyjamas and changed into one of her lumpy jumpers, taking care to mess her hair up vigorously as she did. Jumper on, she picked up a pair of her loose, billowing trousers from her drawers. Jamie then tucked them into the elastic of her painfully bleached socks adding an extra 'layer' to her nerdish appearance. Mostly changed now, Jamie was free to scurry off to her desk, shove on her fake glasses and snag her sneakers from their spot under her desk.
"Only two and half minutes, personal best I'd say Persephone," Jamie smiled brightly, picking up the ancient cat from where it was snoozing on her bed. "What do you think, boyish enough?" the elderly feline raised its head obligingly and nodded before drifting off back to sleep. Jamie shrugged and turned to face the full length mirror double checking her disguise.
Today was hugely important and her disguise had to be up to snuff or Numbuh 71.562 (who was said to be especially observant) was sure to find her out. She had gotten away with it in the Artic, but most of her fellow cadets weren't that smart – she was sure they'd make good enough operatives, Jamie hastened to add – they were just unlikely to look beyond their first assumptions. Her research down in the Deep Sea Science Labs meant that she'd be pretty isolated in the day to day workings (no one wanted to be near an explosives expert even if they enjoyed the tech they produced) but as the new scientist on rotation there'd be a huge level of scrutiny on her in the first week. Jamie narrowed her eyes and glared at the reflective surface quickly cataloguing her details. Epic bed hair, with her frizzy black hair bouncing around her head, huge cat eye glasses (a little too fashionable for Jamie's taste but she'd stolen the frames from her Papa so it was to be expected) muddying brown eyes further. There was nothing to be done about her teeth, abnormally perfect as they were (not even a single cavity it was so disheartening). Grey jumper, with excessively rolled up sleeves over her normal shirt, black trousers held up by a scruffy leather belt, tucked into ratty trainers. She nodded proudly at her reflection. It had been difficult since she was naturally quite cute but Jamie was fairly certain she'd managed to pull it off. Passing herself off as a boy that is.
Truth be told she was a little annoyed by the whole ordeal, but the scientists (or more specifically Numbuh 74.239) on the DSSL were notoriously anti-girl citing possible coogitisnal Octo-Oogie Tetra-Infecto Epi-Stractococcus infections – this was utter rubbish of course but they had the benefit of senior operative status. Jamie had only finished her artic training the previous summer and as such wasn't really able to fight their assertions. Also, Jamie was a full-fledged Nerd (even if she didn't normally look like one) which didn't give her any favours when trying to court command. Her habit of using words like 'court', 'visage' and 'cataloguing' in her sentences meant they had to have a 'nerd' translator (normally the sibling of a nerd) on standby whenever she talked to them. Small mercies that it had been one such operative who conducted her interview or she might not have made it through the lollipop round.
Deciding she was ready Jamie ran downstairs and streaked into the kitchen grabbed an apple. "Sorry Dad got to go, got big plans today, tell Papa I'll be out past supper," Jamie yelled as she breezed out the kitchen.
"This that science club of yours?" Dad asked over his newspaper not seeing her outfit.
"Sure is," Jamie agreed happily as she munched happily on her apple, making a beeline for her rucksack, which sat innocently by the door. "Bye Dad!"
"Bye sweetie," Dad called from the kitchen, as he said this Jamie stretched onto her tip toes and pushed open the door, peering out of the landing window, she could just see the school bus approaching in the distance so she scurried down the stairs and over to the bus stop.
As per usual she was one of four people waiting at the stand, 2 of whom were teenagers and remaining one might as well have been given how teenage-like she dressed. Jamie frowned but sat and was ignored by the older kids for being a 'snot nosed brat' as usual. Sometimes she really wished she lived in the suburbs with all the other kids but her Dads liked their urban flat and weren't planning on giving it up anytime soon, so she was stuck taking the long commute to Gallagher elementary school.
Finally, the bus arrived and Jamie gleefully jumped on, because this particular bus was special. Hurrying up the stairs, she quickly ran past the animatronic adult D.A.N. (or Decoy Adult Nockoff) who sat before the virtually empty seats and up to the door that separated the normal school bus from the KND portion of the bus. Two large boys, with their numbers 'subtly' painted across their chests stood guard.
"Who's the squirt?" Numbuh 69 asked elbowing his companion, Numbuh 4475.
"Dunno," Numbuh 4475 admitted. "Oi, nerd who are you?" He questioned leaning in to squint at the eight-year-old before him.
"Jamie- sorry, Numbuh 707 sir," Jamie replied saluting. Any aggression the boys held against her melted away.
"New recruit ay?" Numbuh 69 grinned brightly. "First time back there?"
"Yes sir, I'm getting assigned my sector today." Jamie admitted nervously trying to glance past them.
The boys shared a secretive smile and turned back to Jamie. "Oh? What sector, you a 2X4 scientist cause sector L really needs one - "
"Not likely, young Numbuh 707 is destined for much greater heights than a mere technology officer." A voice sneered. The guards quickly came to attention but Jamie could see the urge filtering through Numbuh 4475 to give the boy behind the door a wedgie. However, his professionalism won through and he begrudgingly opened the door revealing Numbuh 74.239's smug face. "Numbuh 707 we've been expecting you, come along," with mighty swirl of his scientist cloak – coat, coat! - he twirled around to march back through the walkway.
Jamie bobbed her head at the guards and hurried after, only to stop in her tracks, jaw agape. This part of the 9 o'clock bus was absolutely dripping in 2X4 technology and operatives from various sectors had made themselves comfortable. She could see girls and boys wearing the space kits required for Moon base operatives, their helmets sitting by their side. To the side she saw some of the international operatives, obviously here for a global meet-up of sorts. The kids that interested Jamie the most however were the ones dressed in lab coats and deep sea gear towards the back.
"Numbuh 707 we do not have all day," Numbuh 74.239 stated imperiously still marching forward. "Now, here are the basic facts you will be required to work by, until the end of your assignment with the Deep Sea Science Laboratory sector you will not attend school, a decoy has been sent to replace you, though you will be expected to keep up with homework."
"Yes sir," Jamie squeaked, desperately hoping the arrogant scientist would assume the squeak was due to nervousness and not girlishness.
"I will admit your research is fascinating but I warn you that the priority will always be with our P.I.M.P.L.E team, we have made some brilliant steps forward in our war against the teenagers and I will not allow it to stall simply because you require personal attendance," Numbuh 74.239 continued on as if Jamie had never spoken.
"Yes sir," Jamie agreed liberally, after all she wanted to see as little of the arrogant scientist as possible – great leaps her butt, their bio project was going to be an absolute bust in the long run, the machine was too big to start with, but Jamie could hold her tongue. No point in aggravating her boss as her Papa would say and as a photographer Papa worked with some very irritating people so he would know.
"Gentlemen, this is our newest recruit Numbuh 707, 707 these are the scientist of the Deep Sea Science Laboratory and our chief security officer Numbuh 2000." Numbuh 74.239 introduced her. Jamie waved shyly at the others and a little disappointed (but not surprised) to note that most of the kids around her were in the fourth or fifth grade. Ah well, this had been the assignment she wanted so she wasn't going to complain. At least not aloud.
Numbuh 2000 than screamed something about protecting the KND from adults but if Jamie was being honest all she heard was paranoid shrieking. Given that no one else was reacting Jamie assumed this behaviour was old hat for the head of security. Oh dear.
Jamie then took a seat next to the youngest scientist Numbuh 275 who looked up from his book and gave Jamie a bland smile. Jamie took a leaf out of his "book" and she tugged out her own chemistry book. She had a new type of knock out grenade that she wanted to finish by the end of the week and a glance to the schedule board identified that she wouldn't be arriving at sector J (and therefore the Aqua bus) for another hour.
The hour and subsequent journey passed quickly and before Jamie knew it she was in the entrance hall to the famed laboratory. Numbuh 74.239, who had obviously been assigned as her guide, quickly and efficiently toured Jamie around the Lab before safely depositing her in her lab which was located on the far side of the underwater tree house.
"Good luck with your research Numbuh 707, the Kids next door is expecting great things out of you, eventually." Numbuh 74.239 admitted evasively walking briskly out of her lab (her lab! Wasn't that amazing?).
Jamie wasted no time and within the next four hours she triggered no less than fifteen explosions 6 of which were controlled. It looked like today was going to be a day of new personal bests!
And then an explosion occurred that on the other side of the building and had not been triggered by Jamie. Her first port of call was the security officers and her worries were not alleviated by the communication, if anything it worsened them.
"Numbuh 2000, what's going on?" Jamie asked into her communicator, pitch steadily rising as fear made her squeakier and squeakier. Her stomach dropped when she overheard wailing on the other end of the makeshift phone.
"EV-AC-U-ATE!" Numbuh 2000 screeched, still pronouncing his words in the strangest way, over the sound of ray guns and rocket boots. "I RE-PEAT, EV-AC-U-ATE Teenagers have – aaargh!" His words were cut short by the sound of blaster. Jamie went cold and then moved on instinct.
Turning back to her monitor she briefly tried to get in contact with Sector J but the communication signal had been totally severed. She would not be rousing help this way.
She raced over to air tight container she'd placed all the prototypes from that day's work and ripped the door open, taking just enough care when placing them in her upgraded B.A.C.K.P.A.K (Big Advanced Container Karries Portables Aiding Kids) not to set them off.
Weapons stored, Jamie dragged herself up to the sealing and over to the air vents, grabbing the emergency G.I.L.S (Great imergency Leave Swiftly) from its box as she went. Jamie had always been a much better stealth fighter than she had been a brawler so when she moved through the network of tunnels over the treehouse, she knew no one would hear her.
First things first, she had to get a transmission off base, preferably straight to Moon base but Jamie would settle for back up from sector J and Ca. Relying on gut instinct she manged to find the signal nexus point, only having to shuffle backwards twice. She felt sick to her stomach when she padded over the room that the Teenagers were keeping the other operatives in. By the sounds of it, the Teenagers were indulging in some baseless bullying.
Jamie steeled her nerves though, attacking the Teenagers now, whilst gratifying would not help her fellow operatives. She was feeling extremely vindictive though, so she tugged out a handful of small spider shaped bots from the side pocket of her bag. Her A.R.A.C.H.N.I.D (Amazingly Repulsive Aroma Creator Helps Neutralize Infiltrators Definitely) were one of her more vicious creations. Based off skunk spray and then multiplied by the power of Gym it would take the teenagers months to get rid of the scent without her antidote but Jamie didn't care – they had invaded her sector and they were going to pay for that!
"Activate code word find," Jamie whispered into her palm, triggering a brief flash of red lights and spindly legs. "Target: Teenagers," with that the A.R.A.C.H.N.I.D scurried out of her hands and through the ventilation and into the room. Satisfied that they were latching themselves onto the necessary targets, Jamie moved on. She would trigger the explosion later, for now she had other priorities.
The pulsating Root network that allowed the isolated sector contact with the rest of the globe, came into sight causing Jamie to crawl faster. "Note to self, have vents cleaned." Jamie grumbled lightly as removed her walkie talkie and used a cable to amplify the connection. With a dry mouth pressed on the call symbol, the moon base digits plugged into the screen.
"Moon base come in, this is Numbuh 707 of sector DSSL requesting emergency contact, I repeat emergency contact requested." Jamie whispered onto the speaker, sighing with relief when the helmet head of a moon base operative came into view.
"Numbuh 707 what's your emergency," the operative asked, Jamie couldn't see his number on her blurry screen. "If this is about the ice-cream stores, I will tell you what I told Numbuh 71- "
"Teenagers have infiltrated the sector; I need immediate back up." Jamie interrupted the senior operative, too scared to bother about protocol. "The security team is not present and the Scientists have been taken hostage, please I need help, I don't have that much to fight back with and…"
"Breathe soldier," the operative claimed, he was obviously training to be the next artic drill sergeant but Jamie did as instructed and took a deep gulp of dusty air. "I'm passing you onto the supreme leader now okay? We're sending back up to your sector as we speak." With that the screen flickered for brief moment until the much clearer image of the Supreme leader and venerated operative Numbuh 247 came into view. Jamie first thought when he came into view was this: today was a heck of a first day. Jamie shook her head clear and tried to salute only to bang her hand on the very low ceiling of the vent. She bit her lip to avoid crying, she didn't want to give away here position any more than she had already.
"Sir, Supreme leader sir," Jamie said, salvaging her botched salute.
"At ease, Numbuh," The supreme leader glanced down at a piece of paper on his desk, "707, I need an explanation of what's going on."
"Sir, I can't say anything about the infiltration except it happened, but, but I can tell you that there are four Teen Ninjas at least and probably more, they also seem to be concentrating on the scientists, but I don't know, I don't know," Jamie held onto her tears for dear life. Numbuh 247 seemed to notice this though.
"Hey, Numbuh 707, don't be sad, you've done an amazing job already, okay? We have our best operatives on the case," he comforted the second grader. "But I need to know, do you have any idea what they're after?" A business like tone returned to his voice, replacing the soft comfort.
"Nnn-o-o, sir, I'm, I just, I joined the sector today sir, I'm the new attack weaponry engineer and they didn't want my lab near the bio research so they put me on a- help!" Jamie's conversation was interrupted when a huge muscled hand ripped open the ventilation shaft and yanked her out. Jamie lashed out kicking, screaming and biting as she tried to escape the Teenagers grip but it was no use.
"Well look what we have here, another snot nosed nerd," he sneered "You trying to call your punk little friends baby?"
Jamie spat in his eye for the offensive terminology. She was not a baby.
"Why you little!" He snarled hurling her over his shoulder and then chucking her into the room with other scientists.
"Found that one crawling around the ventilation shafts ma'am," The behemoth explained to his superior, a slim brown-haired girl.
"Hmm, well it's of no matter, we got the plans, weakling broke whilst you were out," she replied waving her free hand, the other wrapped around a thick manila folder. Jamie glanced over to the other boys who glanced away ashamed. Jamie turned back to the teens and could just about see the words printed across the folder – Project immunity. It was the scientist latest attempt at a vaccine against the dreaded Chicken Pox.
"Mam, the KN dorks are approaching." A voice crackled over the Teens coms.
"Alright let's move out," the girl began and Jamie went cold. She couldn't let them take those files, if they got them they could find a way of worsening the pox and set back preventive research by decades.
With her heart pumping out of control in her chest Jamie spoke. "Code word: Battle stations!" and with that an almighty bang sounded and clouds of pink smoke billowed everywhere.
"What the hell is that!" A voice shrieked but Jamie paid it little attention. She surged to action, thankful that they hadn't restrained her. Using the smoke and god-awful smell to cover her, she snatched the folder from the girls weakened grip and ran.
"After her!" They yelled and at the moment Jamie very much wished she was fitter than she was but she didn't have a choice. She flung herself through broken windows and up ladders, only just managing to avoid the rocket booted teenagers that chased relentlessly after her.
Jamie would never forgive the other boys for forcing her into a situation where she had to run so much – she left artic training behind months ago!
A ray of light appeared however, when the sweeping beams of a pod of B.L.U.B.B.E.R appeared just beyond the windows. Jamie ran as fast as her little legs could carry her into the hanger and was relieved to see that a school bus had been hurled through the wall.
"Help!" She yelled flapping the folder to get their attention. One operative, Numbuh 362, let loose an oath and shot forward to fire at the approaching Teenagers.
"What the hell is that smell?" One of the kids asked as the foul scent floated over them. The female teenager let out a screech of inarticulate rage at the question.
"BAD QUESTION! BAD QUESTION!" Jamie screamed as the teenager became more determined and a laser skimmed past her ear.
"Kids Next door, Battle stations!" Numbuh 362 yelled. The operatives hurled themselves into fray various weapons on hand. Jamie threw herself behind the group and handed over the file to one of the messenger tagged operatives then turned right back around and threw a M.A.R.B.L.E in the teenager's face.
"I am not a baby!" She crowed victoriously as the behemoth teen crashed into the floor with a pained groan.
"Nice shot!" Numbuh 60, who Jamie knew from her time in basic training (though he'd been with the advanced batch), bellowed over the battle. "How'd you learn to throw like that at training?"
"Motivation sir!" Jamie shouted back as she threw yet another explosive at the teens, who were losing badly now. Numbuh 60, because he's very clearly insane no matter how well he hides it with proper protocol, gave a delighted laugh at her response.
The teens gave another inarticulate howl of rage when they saw an emergency escape pod surge past the window, taking the research with them. "Retreat," the leader spat, turning around backwards through the corridors, obviously heading back to the ship they'd used to infiltrate the base. "Mission's a bust,"
Jamie staggered with relief and fell to the floor, chest heaving as she desperately tried to get her breath back.
"Medic!" Someone yelled, but Jamie raised a hand and batted aside the concerns.
"Isss. Fine." She panted "just. Tired. Too much running." She groaned.
Numbuh 60 laughed again, fists clenched at his waist and head thrown back. Wonder if he knows that he laughs like a supervillain, Jamie thought idly.
"Well done Numbuh 707, you've a great service to the kids of the world today. Now rest," Numbuh 362 told her patting her hand as she was carried over to the gurney and wheeled into one of the medic vans that had arrived.
Jamie gave her a grateful smile and promptly went to sleep. She was not supposed to have exciting, dramatic missions, its why she chose the DSSL sector in the first place. Being a hero was way too tiring.
Authors note: * I tried very hard to make an acronym for backpack but all I got was Big advanced container Kan so if anyone can think of good acronym can you PM me it and I'll alter the definition and give credit where its due.