Author's Note: I have decided to start off the next new chapters of The Heart of An Angel as a different story entirely. Here are the reasons why. As this is going on, the start of the second installment of THOAA marks the start of the next season in Supernatural, Season 10, so it would only make sense that the new season is represented as something separate from the story you know so far. Also, a lot of shit has happened by this point (both in THOAA and the show) so like the TV series, you guys probably need a recap. Lastly, Cassandra is an entirely different person from who she was at the start. She's matured, grown, and evolved into a new individual with new obstacles and a new set of problems. So it would make sense for the start of her new journey to be shown as its own set of chapters. So I give you the second "Novel" in this Fanfic, The Life of An Angel.

The Road So Far…

Carry On My Wayward Son

Muddy footprints littered the floor of the Bunker. Sam and Dean followed them with guns and flashlights in hand, to find a young girl, fast asleep in one of the beds…

There'll be peace when you are done

The impulse to move forward was so strong but it only weakened his ability to walk.

"CAS!" Dean immediately rushed to help him, bracing him over his shoulders.

Cas felt that his heart was about to burst from his chest. "NO. It's…It's impossible," he managed to gasp out, but Dean heard him.

"What?" Dean said, searching Cas' blue yes for answers.

Castiel: I feel the presence of an Angel. I have to see her.

Sam: Why? Who is she?

Castiel: My sister.

Lay your weary head to rest

"You aren't my friends," she said hesitantly. "I don't have friends."

"It's all real. Angels, Heaven…even God."

Don't you cry no more

"Why are you all frazzled-looking? Did you get lucky in the past five minutes?"

Dean: You're defending her.

Sam: Well, yeah. You're acting like a jerk towards her when she's obviously not a threat to us.

Dean: Nah, that's not it. You like her.

Once I rose above the noise and confusion

"She can't stay here. She's dangerous! She has powers that she obviously can't control!"

Just to get a glimpse beyond this illusion

"Sam, right now I'm not – "

" – Cas, I need you to read something. It's on the back of Cassandra's watch."

"What is it?"

Sam grinned with triumph. "It looks like Enochian."

I was soaring ever higher

"How old were you when you had your first kiss?"

Goddammit why did the conversation always get back to this? She didn't respond, looking down at the table.

Dean opened up a new beer and took a swig, but froze when he looked at her again. "Cassie?"

She didn't even look at him.

Oh shit. "You…have been kissed before, right?"

But I flew too high

Holy shit. There was no way that Dean Winchester had just gotten schooled in classic rock by a 22-year-old Virgin. This was not happening.

Though my eyes could see I still was a blind man

"You and Sam are hunters. If you had been given any reason to believe I was a monster…would you have killed me?

Dean swallowed suddenly, startled by the question. "That's kind of a dark topic for so early in the morning, don't you think?"

Though my mind could think I still was a mad man.

"How about we talk about how you have the hots for my brother?"

Cassandra blushed, but grinned. "You still haven't denied anything."

Dean paused a bit longer than should've been necessary. "I'm not into Cas."

"That felt forced."

"We're done talking."

I hear the voices when I'm dreaming

"I'm not putting my sister's life at risk for a second time! I don't care that she's not at her full power or that she doesn't remember me. I'll take her no matter what form she's in because she's my sister and I love her. And I am not, under any circumstance, taking the risk of losing her again!

I can hear them say

When was the last time that kissing felt like this? It was as if there was a current of lightning flowing through the both of them. There were burning sensations everywhere their skin touched and they hadn't even taken their clothes off.

Carry on My Wayward Son

"I'm unwell because the one person in my life who isn't supposed to keep secrets from me is doing just that, and dammit Cas you know I'd help you! Why isn't Cassandra something we can fix together?"

There'll be peace when you are done

"Why me?" he asked softly.

Dean swallowed nervously, leaning into Castiel's warm touch. "B-because I didn't have faith in God until you decided to have faith in me."

Lay your weary head to rest

"Hunters don't give away weapons like that to just anyone, and we only do it when we think it's necessary. So it means two things. One, that he thinks there will come a time when you need it, and two, he plans to teach you how to use it."

Don't you cry no more!

She realized there was a lot more in the mirror than there had been before. Cassandra thought she knew who she was, but she was just barely starting to figure it out.

Masquerading as a man with a reason

She rolled her eyes. This hunk of man is going to be the death of me, I swear.

My charade is the event of the season

"I'll never find love like this again, Sam. You're my first and my only. I don't remember my Angel life but I know that even if I had my memories form then it would still be true. You're the only man I've ever loved and I want to stay with you forever."

And if I claim to be a wise man

"Every Angel that needs a weapon is forged one after God sends in a commission for them. I know the names and faces of every client, Angel or otherwise. It's my job. We've been crafting weapons for the divine beings of this world for thousands of years. The jewelry industry is more of a cover, really, to hide the main operation of weapon-forging.

Well, it surely means that I don't know.

"This is all because of that human, isn't it? You don't care about the demons you've slaughtered, or how long you've been on this earth, you don't even really care about Sarah. It's him, isn't it? The human, Sam. He's the reason you're resisting."

"I am done with hearing about that flannel-clad denim doormat you call lover," he said the last word like it was a curse word he hated using.

On a stormy sea of moving emotion

"Oh. Well, that's good then. Why is Dean in Missouri?"

"Oh, he didn't tell you about his little rendezvous with Crowley?"

There was a long pause. "No," Cas said, obviously mad. "Why is he with Crowley?"

"They're looking for something called the First Blade so they can kill Abaddon."

Tossed about, I'm like a ship on the ocean

"Having that mark…it's going to change you, Dean. You may feel fine right now, but if you don't keep this thing in check…it's going to be the end of you."

"No, you'll be the end of me. It's always a fucking roller-coaster with you!"

"I don't intend – "

"Well, it doesn't matter because it is! You're a supernatural being, so of course I can't know your whereabouts 24/7 but that just adds to the stress! I don't know what I feel about you, but whatever it is I can't feel it because if we…" Dean swallowed, closing his eyes and turning away. "If we could be something, you'd outlive me anyway. So what's the point?!" Dean slammed his fist on the table, channeling all of his hurt and anxiety into that one punch. "And now you're looking at me like I'm some kind of freak. I'm not Sam when he was tripping on Demon Blood, or you when you were filled to the brim with Leviathans, I'm just me!"

I set a course for winds of fortune

Sam growled, "It wasn't the sex! It wasn't just sex, either. It was so much more than that!"

Dean still couldn't believe that Sam was so careless and selfish. "Oh wait, yes I can. "Yeah yeah, you guys made love. Great. But you were her first, Sam. Her first everything. You took her virginity and you're gonna end up taking her life!"

But I hear the voices say

"I wanted to tell you that whatever comes with having this Mark…you're not going through it alone. We'll deal with the consequences together. I'm here for you."

Carry on my wayward son

"I am so fed up with your constant suspicion and this bitch fest that you've been on. Okay? Ever since you two got back from Maine you've been possessive, irritable and overly-protective, and even Cassie sees the change! If you don't wanna trust me, then fine, but you should at least trust her! She fucking adores you!"

Sam winced. Don't bring her into his. "If you really have no romantic interest in her what so ever then why do you look at her the way you do?"

"Because sometimes, in the right lighting and at the right angle, she looks just like Cas!"

There'll be peace when you are done

If I tell him that I'm an Angel, I might as well announce it to the entire world. Hell would know, Heaven would know…

But wait. What if the other Angels could help? Maybe find a way to get Sarah out of her…

But they'd probably want her to go back to serving Heaven the ways he used to.

And she wanted a life with Sam.

Lay your weary head to rest

Sam smiled, holding her hand again. "You can consider yourself an official Hunter now. You took a bullet for us, you're pretty handy with spells, and you've got more guts than Dean and I combined."

Cassie smiled. "I seriously doubt that," she countered.

Don't you cry no more, no!

Cassie took a breath, then looked back up at Sam. "My brother is in this fight. More directly than I am, but it used to be that he and I were alongside each other no matter what. This is my fight too. It's who I am. Remember?"

Carry on

"You speak of the ideal circumstances, where everyone loves one another as brother and sister. What you describe is a Utopia, which does not exist."

"Sic liberare constringantur vincula vestra," she chanted and the angel-proof shackles broke. Gadreel stared at her, eyes wide.

She smiled. "It could," she said.

You will always remember

You know what? Fuck it. There's nothing wrong with what I feel. "He'd love to come," Dean smiled at him as he said it, and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. Color rose to his face and he was shy about it, but the message was clear to Cas.

You're mine and I'm proud of it.

Carry on

Sam: Metatron knows she's alive and on our side. She's already in danger. So instead of letting her become a target, we can turn her into a threat."

Castiel: You are Cassandra, Pure of Heart. Commander in Chief of Michael's Army, and the most ruthless Warrior in our Garrison. If the Angels knew that you are alive and well, they would join you in a heartbeat. Your return would be the biggest event in all of our history."

Nothing Equals the Splendor

Cassie: This tug of war game you've been playing with my body needs to stop.

Sarah: I wouldn't say tug-of-war. More like…a puppeteer controlling the motions of a marionette. You didn't put up much of a fight.

Cassie: Or else.

Sarah: If you had the balls to kill me, you would've done it by now. But you don't quite have the juice, do you? The only way to get rid of me is to wiggle your nose and concoct that spell you have in your pocket. But you wouldn't risk your life just to have me out of the way…would you?

Now your life's no longer empty

Sam sat up to face her, and stared straight into her eyes. "You made a promise to me that no matter what, you'd build a life with me. No matter what you learned about your past, or if you ever reclaimed your grace, nothing would change how we feel about…us."

"Sam…if I were another Angel, and I was possessing Sarah, what would you be trying to do?"

Sam didn't speak partly because he knew what the answer would be.

He'd do everything in his power to eject the Angel and save the human.

Because that was their job.

"it's not the same," he insisted.

Surely heaven waits for you

"A New York number?" Sam looked at his phone with scrutiny, but picked it up and answered. "hello?"

"Hi, is this Sam or Dean Winchester?"

"Yeah, this is Sam."

"Oh, good. I…my Aunt Jodie said I should talk to you."

"Sheriff Jodie Mills?"

"Yes. My name is Elyse, and I've been…well…this is going to sound crazy…"

Carry on my wayward son

Cas rolled his eyes. "For God's sake, Dean, we've been physically intimate, we share a bed, we've spent the night together on more than one occasion, shared meals together, all of that on top of the fact I raised you from perdition – "

"– Oh, come on! Not that again, you can't keep pulling that card on me – "

"– WE'RE TOGETHER, OKAY?!"

There'll be peace when you are done

Sarah: You promised. You said just a bit longer. You were going to find a way for us both to coexist.

Cassie: I'm sorry but I don't have the luxury of spending time searching for a cure anymore. He's right. I can't protect my family as a human. That's already been proven. Elyse and David are dead because all I could do was throw salt at a ghost and then crumble to pieces.

Sarah: We were supposed to be in this together! I was even starting to like you!

Cassie: I don't have a choice anymore. Time's up.

Lay your weary head to rest

"Just because our job is to protect people that doesn't mean we've never killed anyone," Dean said in a dangerous tone. "Make no mistake: The only reason you're still standing and not six feet under is there's a chance that Cassie is still in there somewhere. That is the only meal ticket you've got."

"Who are you?" She asked.

He pulled away and snapped his fingers. They had left Cassie's mindscape and were now inside a small café in the dead of winter. "I've been known by a lot of different names," he confessed, "But you can call me Chuck."

Don't you cry

Chuck: Even youths grow tired and weary. And young men stumble and fall. But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like Eagles, they will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not be faint.

Don't you cry no more!

Sam laughed darkly. "What did you expect? That after you'd defeated her, Dean and I would welcome you with open arms? That I'd fall in love with you on the spot, Cas would take you in as his sister, and everything would be hunky-dory? Life doesn't work that way. You can't just take someone's place and pick up where they left off!"

No more!

"Look," Sarah forced out with the little oxygen she had left, "I don't care if getting back your mojo changes how you feel. You save Sam. Help Dean. Fix Cas. Stop that Mega-man or whatever he's called. Do what I can't."

The chilling response echoed deep and dark inside her chest.

I intend to.

One month ago….

"If the spell works, and my Grace is awakened…" she looked out the window, contemplating. "I'm not going to be the same woman, am I?"

Castiel kept his eyes on the road, but images of his sister clad in silver armor slashing left and right at Demons flooded his mind. Cassandra soaring through the air, her pure white wings glistening pink and orange as the color of the sky was caught by the tips of her feathers. Her graceful movements, her coarse, wild tribal style of warfare, a technique that had been lost to the Angels for thousands of years since they adapted to be more refined as times changed. And her teeth clenched in fury, her eyes blazing with an icy coldness that was only ever seen in combat as her blades grew coated in black blood.

If all of that came back to her…

"No," he simply said.

Then…

Cassie's words echoed in Sam's mind, not meaning anything at first, then crashing on him slowly and painfully like a Sphygmomanometer.

Sam, there's a reason my healing didn't work on him.

Do you know how Cain became the first demon?

According to the story, he couldn't live with what he was becoming, and so he attempted to end his life. He died.

But it didn't work.

Dean's not dead.

He's something worse.

Now….

Chapter 1

Into the Fire

Sam paced back and forth in Dean's room while Cassandra watched silently from the corner. After a few moments of doing this, he finally looked at Cassandra again.

The woman he loved, who he thought he'd never see again, was there, in perfect health.

But it wasn't the same Cassandra.

And he didn't even have time to ponder what her resurgence meant because of Dean's disappearance.

"He can't be a demon, Cassie," Sam insisted. "Crowley probably has some demon scum parading around in his meat suit like it's the funniest – "

"He has an anti-possession tattoo," Cassie reminded him gently. "He can't be possessed, even in death."

"Dean is not a demon! He has been stolen or kidnapped, whatever you want to call it, but Crowley knows where he is, I'm sure of it."

Cassie bit her lip. "What should we do?"

Sam didn't have a chance to answer before there was a knock at the door.

They both stiffened, Sam pulling out his gun and Cassie simultaneously withdrawing her Suan Ywe Gou.

Sam blushed, surprised to see Hunter reflexes from Cassie.

But then he remembered.

Soundlessly she made it down the hallway, up the stairs and to the vault door of the Bunker.

She opened it to find another Angel standing there.

"Greetings, Cassandra the Dual Wielder," he said with a smile.

She lowered her blade and relaxed. "Hello, Joshua," she said.

"I'm glad you have returned to your full strength. Congratulations on your recovery," he said professionally but not coldly.

Sam eventually joined her outside the door of the Bunker.

"Your brother requests your presence. I'm here to escort you to Heaven's Gate so you can resume your duties," he beamed.

Escorting Cassandra was probably going to be the highlight of his career as an Angel. "Well, since the war is over, I'm not sure I really have any – "

" – Oh nonsense, we'll find a place for you in the new regime in no time! With your numerous talents and abilities, finding a new job won't be difficult at all," he assured her.

Cassie's eyes flickered to Sam's. "May I have a moment, Joshua?"

"Of course, take all the time you need," he said.

She ducked back behind the bunker door with Sam. She shook her head once they made eye contact in the dark space. "I can't leave while this is happening," she told Sam. "Dean is important to me too. We need to figure out what's going on."

Sam nodded. "Of course. I know that." Sam thought for a moment. "But your brother needs you. He's still weak because of his fading grace, and Cas can't do all the work of leading the Angels alone."

Cassie reached up on her tiptoes to plant a soft kiss on Sam's mouth, then pulled away. "Yes, but…I mean…there's a lot that we haven't yet discussed."

Sam tensed. "You mean with us?" he asked, immediately feeling a wad of anxiety form in his chest.

Cassie sighed. "I have all these…emotions, feelings…" she tried to get out, making vague hand motions. "I shouldn't have any of them. I should not have much of a regard for humans, let alone be emotionally attached to them…have…a...romantic...tie with…" and she trailed off, thinking about all of the mind-blowing physical experiences she'd had with Sam, and immediately fell silent, flushing bright red.

Sam pulled her against him in a tight embrace. "Feelings don't need a reason to exist, they just do," he told her. "As long as what you feel for me hasn't changed, then that's all that matters."

Cassandra shivered, overcome with all of her new memories. All including images of Sam. His smile, the tints of color in his eyes, how effortlessly he could envelop her in his arms and make her forget about everything. Not to mention the physical aspect of their relationship. Sam's intense sensuality in bed, a stark contrast to his firm yet gentle demeanor, and all of the firsts she's had with him. "It hasn't changed," she said breathlessly, "but the way I see these emotions is different."

Her two pasts were coexisting in parallel. The past twenty years as a human, the 4,000 years of being an Angel of the Lord. One of them had been a drifter, a silly girl in love, another had been a warrior with a past and family.

Now, she was both.

And also neither.

"Maybe this could be good for you," Sam said. "I don't want you to leave, but for now… reacquaint yourself with all the other Angels, get back in the swing of things, see if it helps you."

Cassie thought about it. When she closed her eyes and breathed in the scent of Sam, she could pretend nothing else existed.

She was just Cassie Trevelyan, the lover of Sam Winchester, and companion to the Winchesters.

But she knew in her heart she couldn't be just that anymore.

Cassandra finally pulled away, and nodded. "Okay. I'll report to my brother, receive a new position, and then come back. In the meantime, you search for Dean and when you've found something, pray to me, and I'll come."

Sam smirked. "Or, I can call you," he reminded her, handing her the cell phone she'd left behind.

She blushed. "Oh. Right." Cassie cleared her throat awkwardly, then shuffled back over to the door.

"Hey," Sam said.

She blushed redder, turning around to face him.

"I love you," he reminded her.

To Cassie's surprise, a grin automatically appeared on her face. "I love you," she replied, then stepped out into the sunshine, closing the door behind her.

"Well?" Joshua said expectantly.

"Lead the way."

"Of course. But one thing first."

From behind his back, Joshua revealed what looked like a white women's business suit with a light blue blouse to wear underneath the jacket, and a pair of black heels.

Cassie immediately glared disapprovingly at the ensemble. "No."