This is my first time writing...well pretty much anything since about the 6th grade when it was required for everyone to write a story. This is more of an experimental "I want to get into writing but want to gauge my ability first" thing than an actual story, which is why it's so short. I'd love a healthy dose of constructive criticism. I want to know what kind of horrible writing sins I've committed. Please don't hold back on the criticism. You can call me the worst writer in the world, I'd just prefer you told me what i'm doing wrong rather than just downright insulting me.

In this particular little story, I wanted to portray the Talon company mercs as actual people with some emotion rather than just big targets with guns.
_

Geoff woke up to the sound of gunfire. Moments later, a loud crash sounded from downstairs, followed by screaming and more gunshots. Panic and fear completely overtook Geoff's body. Terrified, Geoff scurried under the bed, covering his mouth to keep from crying out. At this point, he couldn't even hear his mother screaming. The silence was sickening. Geoff stayed under his bed for what was probably only a couple minutes, but felt like an eternity. The silence was finally broken when his door slowly creaked open.
"Come out, come out wherever you are!" a voice called in. It sounded like an older man, probably dad's age.
Footsteps rang out through the room. The intruder was getting closer to the bed. Tears streamed from Geoff's eyes as he fought every instinct to cry and sob, his heart pounding in his ears. Who were these people? Why were they here?
Geoff was hysterical. He wanted to kick, scream, cry, and sob. Suddenly, the footsteps stopped. Everything went quiet again. The silence was short lived, however. Just as Geoff reached for the sheets hiding him, a hand reached through and grabbed Geoff's hair as the man screamed
"C'mere ya little brat!"
Geoff thrashed and screamed, hitting at the man's iron grip, but it was useless, the hand didn't let go. He was dragged by his hair out from under the bed. Still screaming, he punched and slapped at his assailant's arm, before a heavy steel-toed boot was thrust into his stomach. Still sobbing hysterically, he curled up from the impact and vomited across the floor. Geoff looked up at the intruder in his home. He was a man covered in black combat armor. A black balaclava covered his face. Upon his chest was an emblem of a white talon. The masked man grabbed Geoff by the wrist and dragged him down the stairs, where his father lie dead in a growing pool of blood with his favorite handgun by his side, three bullet holes in his chest. Geoff was dragged out of his house, across the dirt, and into the settlement's center, where the mayor was hanging from a noose around his neck. More men dressed in the black combat armor stood in a line. All of them wielded large guns, most of which, Geoff had never seen before. Geoff was shoved onto the floor where his neighbors and other residents were being held.
"Listen up, scumbags." one of the men stepped forward. "My name is Ian. I'm from Talon Company. See, It's difficult living in these times. Crazy green super mutants kidnapping people and dragging them off to god knows where and crazed raiders killing and mutilating everyone in sight. Even when you're not dealing with them, you have the challenge of finding safe, non-irradiated water and food. So as you can understand, trust is a hard thing to come by. You see, we had a deal. Your mayor here promised food and supplies to us. In return, we left you guys alone. This took so much generosity from us. I mean seriously, we could've easily just gone in, killed you guys, and taken everything. I took a huge leap of faith trusting your spineless mayor here, and what did he do? He tried to steal from us. Why he would do such I thing I can't imagine. Now, I know he wasn't the only one involved. An idiot like him never could've done it alone. I need to know who else was involved." Ian circled the settlement's residents slowly. When nobody spoke up, he grew impatient. "Alright, I tried to be nice, but looks like I have to do this the hard way. Until someone speaks up, I'm going to execute you, one by one. Starting with..." Ian scanned the group and walked up to Geoff , then placed the barrel of his revolver against Geoff's forehead. "If nobody speaks up, I'll have no choice but to shoot" Still nobody said anything. With a sigh, Ian looked down at Geoff, who was crying his eyes out, slobbering, and getting mucus everywhere "Sorry, kid. Don't get mad at me, this is one of your neighbors' fault" To create suspense, Ian pulled back the hammer until it clicked. Moments before he was about to shoot, a voice spoke out "It was me." a middle aged man wearing dirty rags stood up.
"Good, at least you were being honest." With a smile, Ian looked down at Geoff, then pulled the trigger. Geoff's head jerked back as blood, bits of bone, and brain matter flew out from the back of his head. Ian turned toward his men
"Kill them all, then burn the houses, but leave the traitor alive. I want to kill him slowly."