Here's to the Night

Lyrics by Eve 6

Story by Kelly Simms





So denied, so I lied.

Are you the now or never kind?

In a day and a day now,

I'm gonna be gone for good again.

Are you willing to be had?

Are you cool with just tonight?



I have denied everything about my relationship with Spike even to Spike. I lied when I said I didn't love him. Of course, I love him, but you see. Any guy I say I love you to leaves. I need him to stay. I thought I needed the others to stay, but I have never felt like this. He is my equal. Angel was my protector and Riley my protectee. There is no protection with Spike and me. Its just fight the fight, do what needs to be done. If I need help, I know he will be there. Except this time I have to go alone. I am not sure if I will be able to get back. This mission is to help Faith attack another apocalypse. I know Spike would come, but I need to know he is safe. It is one thing to put Faith and myself at risk. It is another to put a distracting husband in the mix.



Here's a toast,

To all those, who hear me, all too well.

Here's to the nights, we felt alive.

Here's to the tears, you knew you'd cry.

Here's to goodbye, tomorrow's gonna come too soon.



Yes, I said husband. Crazy huh. So here I am, planning to sneak off tomorrow morning, while he is still asleep. Horrible, Right? The weird thing is, I think somehow he knows. Tonight he is holding me just a little tighter, like he is afraid he will lose me. I have a feeling he will. You probably want to know if this mission is so dangerous why am I going. It is simple the slayers were created to save the world. Sure, we might die, but that is the fate of all slayers and one I have accepted twice before. It is never easy to leave my family and friends, but this time I am leaving my Spike too. I cannot think about this now. I am just going to fall asleep in the arms that tomorrow will be shaking with angry and fear. I kiss his cheek and drift off to sleep.



Put your name, on the line,

Along with place and time.

Wanna stay, not to go.

I wanna ditch the logical.

My bags are in Faith's car. All I have to do is sign the letter I am leaving Spike. Telling him some of what is going on. I left it optimistic saying stuff like see you when I get back in a couple of weeks, do not be all upset with me, remember to go to the blood bank, not the bar, and be have himself. God, I cannot do this. I cannot leave him. I will just tell Faith to go and I can sneak back upstairs. Faith is staring at me now. She cannot do this alone. Two slayers just might be enough but one it is a suicide mission. Well, either way it is a suicide mission, but two is always better odds to play. I climb into the car and watch our house drift away.



Here's a toast,

To all those, who hear me, all too well.

Here's to the nights, we felt alive.

Here's to the tears, you knew you'd cry.

Here's to goodbye, tomorrow's gonna come too soon.



I cannot hide my feelings from Faith. She knows that I want to be with him and she knows why it had to be like this. I lost count how many vamps we have slayed together, thousands maybe millions. If anybody can pull this off it is the two of us. She looks worried; I guess she sees the tears that are forming in my eyes. I have never been away from him this long since before we were engaged. Faith is saying something about how it is okay to miss him, but not to let it effect my fighting. I ask her how she can be such a heartless bitch. She says that it is easy when your only connection to the world is sitting next to you sobbing hysterically over a guy. I apologize and we start preparing mentally for the fight. As we pull up to where we were going Faith looks over at me and says good luck. I know that that was her goodbye and it was just as hard to say as it was for me to sign.



All my time is frozen motion.

Can't I stay an hour, two, or more?

Don't let me let you go.



Apocalypse defeated! I cannot believe how hard that battle was, but we are safe and on our way back to Sunnydale. I am going home. Home to yelling and screaming, but eventually hugging and kissing. I am at the door. Before I even open it, I am pulled inside, into a deep hug that even my slayer strength could not get me out of, but that is okay. I do not intend to leave this hold for a long time. I will not say never, because I know someday he will have to let me go again. For now, I will just stay here, forgetting everything but him.



Here's a toast,

To all those, who hear me, all too well.

Here's to the nights, we felt alive.

Here's to the tears, you knew you'd cry.

Here's to goodbye, tomorrow's gonna come too soon.

Here's to the night.