~Hey everyone! I'm Ellen and this is my first EVER fanfiction and I decided to do it with Pirates of the Caribbean! I've seen the movie 3 and a half times! I love it! And I love the Wizard of Oz, hence this story! So if it sucks, blame the ferret! *points accusingly toward the ferret* Flames are ok but good reviews are better!~
DISCLAIMER: I own everything! *runs away from all these lawyers* Ok OK! I OWN NOTHING! NOTHING!
I was walking home from school, clutching my pet ferret, Tutu.
"Oh, Tutu! How come we have to live near Mr. Barbossa who gets mad at you for digging up his roses! Let's go tell Auntie Ln!"
I entered our backyard and went into the small storage shed in the far corner. Auntie Ln and Uncle Bob were taking care of the pot plants.
"Auntie Ln! The most horrid thing happened to Tutu!"
"Dear, I'm trying to work here!" Auntie Ln exclaimed, going back to her work.
"Oh, but he almost him over the...."
Uncle Henry interrupted, "Don't bother us. If we mess up..." he shook his fist at me.
I cringed and walked inside of our house and into the living room. I found Jack (one of my Uncle's "associates") lying on the couch upside down.
"Gimme another, dude!" Jack said, moving his hands around like a maniac.
I perched on the arm of the couch, "Jack, what am I to do about Mr. Barbossa! He's threatening..."
"Listen luv. You ain't using ye brains! I think ye have none!"
"I do too!"
"Jus' don't go near Barbossa's place and then Tutu won't go after his roses. Savvy?"
"God, you just don't fucking listen! ARGH!" I threw my hands up in the air and stomped into the kitchen to see Elizabeth. She was cooking some weird smelling concoction.
"LIZ!" I screeched.
"Oh, I'm getting too old for this, Dorothy. Be kind to ol' Barbossa. He hasn't a heart left. I think it would be wise to take pity on her."
"I do try! I honestly do!"
"Try harder. Now get out!"
I wandered back outside only to go into the garage to seek Will out. He came out from under the car, his face splotched in oil.
"You're not going to let Barbossa keep bullying you, are you? Gee, have a little courage!"
I stuck my nose up in the air. "I'm not afraid of that creepy old leering man!"
"William?"
I turned to see Auntie Ln standing in the doorway.
"Uncle Bob wants to see you."
Will got up and left, after doing an imaginary tip of his hat.
"Oh, Auntie Ln! Mr. Barbossa said he was going to...."
"Are you on something? Stop imagining things like that!"
"But I..."
"Now go run along and don't get into any trouble."
I left the garage and walked a little ways over to the park. I let Tutu sit on my shoulder as I wandered around.
"A place of no trouble? I don't even think there's such a place in a crazy world like this. But there must be. Somewhere far away."
I started to sing softly.
"Somwhere, over 2302 miles, way out there,
There's an island I saw of once in a movie.
Somewhere, over 2302 miles, waters are blue,
And the rum that you plan to drink really do come true.
"Someday I'll wish upon a star
And wake up passed in a Faithful bride bar.
Where pirates plunder, pillage and loot
their weasly black guts out
is where you'll find me.
Somewhere, over 2302 miles, sparrows fly.
Swanns fly over 2302 miles,
Why then, oh why can't I?
If happy little blacksmiths can be eunuchs,
Why, oh, why can't I?"
I blinked. That last part didn't fit in all that wonderfully. I heard a soft purr of a motorcycly engine! Mr. Barbossa! I ran all the way back home.
I skidded to a stop and hid behind the mailbox to eavesdrop. And to pick-pocket Barbossa.
"About Dorothy..." Mr. Barbossa said.
"What the hell has Dorothy done NOW?" Uncle Bob said, aggravated.
All I gotten was this wierd medallion. It was a gold circle with a pirate face on it. I put it in my pocket.
"I gotten bites all over me!"
"Ew, she bit you?"
"No, her ferret!"
"Dorothy bit her ferret?"
"NO!"
I came from my hiding place and held Tutu protectively in my arms.
"That ferret is a menace to tis town! I'm taking it to the police!"
"Police? Tutu? Hell no! You can't!" I cried out.
"If you don't hand over that ferret, I'll sue you for that ferret harassing me and sue McDonalds for making me fat! There is laws for these things!"
"What if she keeps it locked up without food or water?" suggested Auntie Ln, appearing out of thin air.
"That's for the law to decide. Unless you want to go against it."
"Uhhh.... I'm afraid we can't go against the law, Dorothy." Auntie Ln emphasized, jerking her head to the direction of the pot plant shed.
"I'll kick your ass if you dare to take Tutu away from me! Uncle, Auntie! Don't let her take Tutu!"
Uncle Bob pried my fingers off my poor ferret and handed it to Barbossa. Tears started to stream down my face and I ran into my room. I laid on my bed crying until I felt the slightest pressure on my back. Tutu!
"You've come back! Oh, Tutu!"
Suddenly a huge gust of wind started to bang against the house.
"Dorothy! A tornado! Come quickly!" Auntie Ln's voice rang out.
I yelled back, "Screw you! No way are you going to trick me into coming out!"
I couldn't hear a response since the winds kept getting louder and louder. I held onto Tutu and laid on my bed. I peeked out the window. All I saw the pot plant shed fly through.
"We're not on the ground!"
Various random things flew past. I sat on my bed and started eating popcorn. All of a sudden, Mr. Barbossa riding his motorcycle is out there! His motorcycle changes into a ship and his clothes change into rags and a big ugly hat!
"I'm blind! BLIND!" I screamed covering my eyes.
The house kept spinning and I kept screaming and then...
THUMP!
I opened my eyes and got Tutu. I walked out of the house only to reveal a port in some island.
"Tutu, Me thinks we're not in California."
DISCLAIMER: I own everything! *runs away from all these lawyers* Ok OK! I OWN NOTHING! NOTHING!
I was walking home from school, clutching my pet ferret, Tutu.
"Oh, Tutu! How come we have to live near Mr. Barbossa who gets mad at you for digging up his roses! Let's go tell Auntie Ln!"
I entered our backyard and went into the small storage shed in the far corner. Auntie Ln and Uncle Bob were taking care of the pot plants.
"Auntie Ln! The most horrid thing happened to Tutu!"
"Dear, I'm trying to work here!" Auntie Ln exclaimed, going back to her work.
"Oh, but he almost him over the...."
Uncle Henry interrupted, "Don't bother us. If we mess up..." he shook his fist at me.
I cringed and walked inside of our house and into the living room. I found Jack (one of my Uncle's "associates") lying on the couch upside down.
"Gimme another, dude!" Jack said, moving his hands around like a maniac.
I perched on the arm of the couch, "Jack, what am I to do about Mr. Barbossa! He's threatening..."
"Listen luv. You ain't using ye brains! I think ye have none!"
"I do too!"
"Jus' don't go near Barbossa's place and then Tutu won't go after his roses. Savvy?"
"God, you just don't fucking listen! ARGH!" I threw my hands up in the air and stomped into the kitchen to see Elizabeth. She was cooking some weird smelling concoction.
"LIZ!" I screeched.
"Oh, I'm getting too old for this, Dorothy. Be kind to ol' Barbossa. He hasn't a heart left. I think it would be wise to take pity on her."
"I do try! I honestly do!"
"Try harder. Now get out!"
I wandered back outside only to go into the garage to seek Will out. He came out from under the car, his face splotched in oil.
"You're not going to let Barbossa keep bullying you, are you? Gee, have a little courage!"
I stuck my nose up in the air. "I'm not afraid of that creepy old leering man!"
"William?"
I turned to see Auntie Ln standing in the doorway.
"Uncle Bob wants to see you."
Will got up and left, after doing an imaginary tip of his hat.
"Oh, Auntie Ln! Mr. Barbossa said he was going to...."
"Are you on something? Stop imagining things like that!"
"But I..."
"Now go run along and don't get into any trouble."
I left the garage and walked a little ways over to the park. I let Tutu sit on my shoulder as I wandered around.
"A place of no trouble? I don't even think there's such a place in a crazy world like this. But there must be. Somewhere far away."
I started to sing softly.
"Somwhere, over 2302 miles, way out there,
There's an island I saw of once in a movie.
Somewhere, over 2302 miles, waters are blue,
And the rum that you plan to drink really do come true.
"Someday I'll wish upon a star
And wake up passed in a Faithful bride bar.
Where pirates plunder, pillage and loot
their weasly black guts out
is where you'll find me.
Somewhere, over 2302 miles, sparrows fly.
Swanns fly over 2302 miles,
Why then, oh why can't I?
If happy little blacksmiths can be eunuchs,
Why, oh, why can't I?"
I blinked. That last part didn't fit in all that wonderfully. I heard a soft purr of a motorcycly engine! Mr. Barbossa! I ran all the way back home.
I skidded to a stop and hid behind the mailbox to eavesdrop. And to pick-pocket Barbossa.
"About Dorothy..." Mr. Barbossa said.
"What the hell has Dorothy done NOW?" Uncle Bob said, aggravated.
All I gotten was this wierd medallion. It was a gold circle with a pirate face on it. I put it in my pocket.
"I gotten bites all over me!"
"Ew, she bit you?"
"No, her ferret!"
"Dorothy bit her ferret?"
"NO!"
I came from my hiding place and held Tutu protectively in my arms.
"That ferret is a menace to tis town! I'm taking it to the police!"
"Police? Tutu? Hell no! You can't!" I cried out.
"If you don't hand over that ferret, I'll sue you for that ferret harassing me and sue McDonalds for making me fat! There is laws for these things!"
"What if she keeps it locked up without food or water?" suggested Auntie Ln, appearing out of thin air.
"That's for the law to decide. Unless you want to go against it."
"Uhhh.... I'm afraid we can't go against the law, Dorothy." Auntie Ln emphasized, jerking her head to the direction of the pot plant shed.
"I'll kick your ass if you dare to take Tutu away from me! Uncle, Auntie! Don't let her take Tutu!"
Uncle Bob pried my fingers off my poor ferret and handed it to Barbossa. Tears started to stream down my face and I ran into my room. I laid on my bed crying until I felt the slightest pressure on my back. Tutu!
"You've come back! Oh, Tutu!"
Suddenly a huge gust of wind started to bang against the house.
"Dorothy! A tornado! Come quickly!" Auntie Ln's voice rang out.
I yelled back, "Screw you! No way are you going to trick me into coming out!"
I couldn't hear a response since the winds kept getting louder and louder. I held onto Tutu and laid on my bed. I peeked out the window. All I saw the pot plant shed fly through.
"We're not on the ground!"
Various random things flew past. I sat on my bed and started eating popcorn. All of a sudden, Mr. Barbossa riding his motorcycle is out there! His motorcycle changes into a ship and his clothes change into rags and a big ugly hat!
"I'm blind! BLIND!" I screamed covering my eyes.
The house kept spinning and I kept screaming and then...
THUMP!
I opened my eyes and got Tutu. I walked out of the house only to reveal a port in some island.
"Tutu, Me thinks we're not in California."