Alright, so I think that this is my best story yet, folks. I'm dead serious. This is a combination of my two favorite things; The Loud House and body switching stories. Crazy, I know! So I hope you all enjoy this, and PLEASE leave me reviews and advice when you're done reading! It's always appreciated! Thank you in advance and I hope you enjoy!
Fourth quarter.
Fifteen seconds left.
No timeouts, no foul to give, last possesion.
What's a guy to do?
Well, shoot, of course! What else could I have done in the situation? PASS? Nothing against my teammates or anything, but it isn't like they're the definition of clutch personified. I got my title for a reason, they get their championships for one reason: ME. I have no WANT to pass; especially in a regular season game like this.
Of course, I was getting ahead of myself. We were still in the huddle, after all. Coach was trying to draw up an extremely complicated trick play, but the general feeling was mutual:give the ball to ME. If we wanted a W, you had no other option.
"Alright, so WHAT are we gonna do?!"
"WIN!"
"AND WHAT ARE WE WINNING?!"
"THE GAME!"
"DEVILS ON THREE! ONE, TWO, THREE-"
"DEVILS!" we shouted in unison. Sure, you'd usually only see that sort of thing in high school ball, but the Los Angeles Devils of the Associated Basketball League did things differently. And who was it all thanks to? Read above.
We got into formation on the opposite side of our court, the crowd screaming like a pack of howler monkeys during mating season. We had become a hot commodity in recent years, and I'm pretty sure you can guess why at this point.
"Yo, Dee, you ready?"
"Hell yeah!" I said back to Sindarius. We had gone to college with each other about 6 years ago, and by then I had enough influence to get him on the Devs. We had always had chemistry toghether; there's nothing more dangerous than playing a well oiled machine. Me and Sin were a JUGGERNAUT; we couldn't be stopped.
"Alright, then! Ball!"
He passed it in to me. I pivoted and began to dribble down the court. Immediately, I was mobbed by the San Diego Vipers point guard. They were a tough team, and they were definitely looking to give us a loss. It was all tied up until then.
I crossed the ball to my other hand, causing him to chase it. Big mistake: I spun, sending him turning and almost faceplanting. The crowd was wild; they loved to see me break ankles. It was part of the gimmick, you catch my drift?
I was at the top of the key; five seconds left. I turned and passed to Sin. He and I had the plan all thought out, I would fake running my route and get to the outside to take the shot. He would dribble a bit and pass back.
But something was different this night. Because for whatever reason, even though I did MY part of the bargain, Sin looked the OPPOSITE direction and passed to Blake Batum. Now, Blake isn't BAD… but he isn't ME.
He shot the ball… it made a pretty arch, reaching the apex as the buzzer sounded. It fell, fell, fell…
SWISH!
You think the crowd was wild before? Well, they LOST IT. These guys went APESHIT when Batum hit the shot. It was like a miniature nuke had gone off in the stadium… and in my head. For while my team was mobbing Blake, I was storming over to the coach.
"COACH!"
He turned to look at me, a look of sheer bliss in his eyes.
"DEE! WE WON!"
"Yeah, I know! But what was that last play?!"
"WHAT?" he shouted. "I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"
"I was supposed to get the points! The buzzer beat-"
"YEAH, YEAH, COOL! WE GOTTA GET TO THE LOCKER ROOM!" he shouted, turning to face the 'hero' of the game again. Ridiculous! I'm the star player and some low life gets the glory? What kind of world is THAT?!
I can sure tell you right now, that is NOT how Deedee Murphy plays basketball. No, that isn't how it's done. I stormed out of the arena, and with good reason. I'm in the middle of an MVP caliber season and old buddy boy over there TAKES it! How disrespectful is that? Not only to ME, but to anyone with SENSE?
I was already in the tunnel when reporters gathered around me. I wasn't sure, but I knew I had just had a good game… forty points was no small feat, you know. But at that point, it was pretty irrelevant to me. I brushed them off and kept going.
I had reached the locker room, if I remember right, when some kid came up to me. He had the arena pass around his neck; must've been a reporter or some shit.
"Hi, Mr. Murphy! Can you sign my jersey?"
Now, before you say anything, no, I'm not one of those douchebags that ignores kids when they ask me for stuff. But at that moment? It wasn't the appropriate time or place for me. So, naturally, I leaned down to his level.
"No."
I didn't stick around to find out what happened next; I was already in the locker room, throwing off my sweat stained . Not to brag or anything, but I was a physical embodiment of a god! Like seriously, you don't get voted sexiest man in basketball with any old figure. You gotta be buff! And I was; working out 6 hours a day on practice days did wonders for your body.
Alright, I wouldn't say that I was a GOD LIKE man, but I was pretty damn close! I had it all, dude! Dark skin, high top haircut, chiseled abs… I was a stereotypical athlete. The thing that set me apart, though, was my eyes. They were green, but had streaks of orange speckled into them. Some medical condition, but there's a reason I was one and done at the university.
The rest of the team filed in, and coach went over highlights and the works. I really didn't pay attention. It's irrelevant to the story, anyways.
I was still throwing my stuff into my gym bag when Sin came up behind me. He was giddy with excitement; you could tell it in his eyes.
"Hey Dee, you coming to Batums place tonight? He's throwing a party to celebrate the win!"
Party, my ass. I was so pissed off, I'm surprised I even entertained the request. But still… a party? Even if it was the dude who stole my glory, it was BOUND to be a good time. And besides… if there was a party with rich people, chances were that there would be some hot women there too. And I don't mean to brag, but I do have a good taste in women.
"-sigh- Alright… can I get a ride, though? My cars in the shop still."
"Yeah, no problem, man! I got plenty of room in my car!"
"Yeah, thanks…"
At this point, we were the only two in the locker room. Sin knew something was wrong with me; I'd been on and off like this since college started. He walked over and sat down next to me, dropping his stuff on the bench.
"Dee, why are you upset, man? We won the game, didn't we?"
"Well, yeah…" I muttered. "But-"
"Dude, I know you wanted to take the shot, ok? I'm sorry I didn't pass to you. I just thought that-"
"What?" I asked, getting defensive. "What did you think would happen?"
"Err, maybe that wasn't the best thing to say. I was scared the ball was gonna get stolen, you know?"
"Yeah, right…" I sighed. "I would've stole it right back."
Sin looked down, contemplating, before he looked back up and put his hand on my shoulder.
"Look man, I know you're stressed right now. What with all the MVP shit going on and all… but you can't let this get you down, bro! You gotta learn to love yourself! If that makes any sense…"
"Hey man, you make perfect sense," I said, standing up. "It's probably just stress, anyway… think we could stop by BK on the way? I've been wanting sone onion rings for a while now."
He stood up, smiling.
"Yeah, man, I think we can do that. Bros?"
He held out his fist. I smiled, doing the same.
"Bros, man. Bros."
Blake Batums House…
"Hey, man! This party is rocking!"
"Don't tell me! Thank Blake!" I yelled back, trying not to fall over. I had lost track of the time; it was around 2 in the morning, I think. Half the team had shown up, and there was the smell of beer and weed EVERYWHERE. Like, in the corner of the kitchen, you could've gotten high just by walking through there. Pretty insane shit, man, pretty insane…
I'll admit, I was high as I'll get out. I'm a regular pot smoker; mostly for medical purposes, but occasionally I'll break out the bong and do some recreational. Luckily, I haven't been asked to do drug screening yet, but I knew that was gonna change soon; the league had made it clear they wanted me in the doctors office sometime this season.
But anyway, I think it was around three, four o'clock-ish when we heard the sirens coming up the hill. They started off faint, but they just gradually grew louder and louder… until they were right outside the door.
Blake turned and shut the music off, puzzled. No one came up this hill without getting through the guards at the front gate… unless…
"HIDE!" He whispered loudly, motioning us to go upstairs. Most of us did, but there were a few drunks and stoners still hanging around, laughing and giggling like a couple of teens that had heard a dirty joke. Even I was still there, talking to Blake as he went to the door.
"Hey, dude, what gives?" I asked, smiling. "It's probably nobody! Turn the mu-"
BANG!
Before you could say "Wilt The Stilt," the door had been kicked open. Police officers were EVERYWHERE: they came in yelling, holding up search warrants, just insane shit. Blake was almost immediately dragged out of the house, but I was behind a recliner before they saw me.
Everyone at this point was in a panic; there was running around, screaming, I think a TAZER even went off somewhere in the middle. I just sat behind the chair, hoping nobody would come over and-
"GOT YA!" someone shouted, grabbing my arm. Now, mind you, I was drunk and shit, but that didn't stop me from DECKING the poor dude that grabbed me. He must've been a rookie cop; he looked young. I knew what had happened, and had almost made it back behind the couch when I WAS tackled, this time from behind.
"DEMETRIUS MURPHY!" The officer shouted over the noise. I wasn't surprised he knew my name; I was famous enough to have my face known worldwide. "YOU'RE UNDER ARREST FOR POSSESSION OF CANNABIS, ASSAULTING AN OFFICER, AND RECKLESS ENDA-"
I didn't hear anything else. I was still in shock over what he had said before. ARRESTED? I had only been arrested once before! And that was only for stealing a stupid goat mascot from a rival college!
It was pointless to argue, though; the officer had already shoved me into the back of a car and was driving down the hill before I knew what was happening. I was pretty sure I was asleep for a while; I woke up as we were on the highway.
"H-Hey, man, let's be reasonable here! I didn't do-"
"Look, man, I really don't care," the officer said, keeping his eyes on the road. "I'm just doing my job, Murphy; I'm sorry you were in the wrong place at the wrong time."
I sulked un the back, handcuffs on my wrists. How demeaning! A star basketball player, chained up! I'm pretty sure you'd never see Lebron Wade or Dwight Bryant in a situation like this!
"Man, LET ME GO!" I shouted, shaking around. He kept driving, closing his eyes to relax himself.
"Hey, man, we just gotta get you processed and then you can get out on bail. Hey, speaking of which, can you sign a basketball when you get released? My son's a big fan, and I would be dad of the year if I could score it!"
"-sigh- Look, dude, I ain't giving shit to a dude that threw me into a cop car! You're serious with that?!"
"-sigh- See, that's the thing about you star athletes these days! So ungrateful! I mean, learn some respect. You're no different than any of us common folks, you know? Ungrateful punks…"
"Ungrateful?!" I asked, insulted. "Who the fuck you calling ungrateful, you piece of-"
The car in front of us suddenly hit his brakes. For what, I'll probably never know, but all I know is that we hit ours too late. The officer slammed into the back of the front car, sending me flying into the back seat. I hit at about 50 miles per hour, and I saw stars… pretty, pretty stars…