I suppose one could say I have led a difficult life. Being as I have died quite a number of times, had to see many of my friends pass away, and well, have been diagnosed as schizophrenic by quite a few of my friends. It's not difficult to go through such things as I have, not when you are someone like myself. Yet, I suppose (if you're human) you wouldn't think so. Although, despite what you think, cat's do lead complex lives.

We must fight for what is right, just as human's must, and believe it or not, we do strive to protect you yellow bellied cowards. I cannot say this aloud though, for fear I will be killed. Since, as I write this, I write with human hands. As I look at this computer screen, I look with human eyes. And, if I spoke to you today, I would speak with human lips.

Many of us felines have been turned into humans, believe it or not. You would not be able to comprehend this, for many of you are very close-minded. Then, after I spoke my story, you would think me mad. But, am I really mad? If you checked my genes, you would find feline blood, yet, on the outside, I look and basically am human.



I imagine now, I should tell you my story. Yet, I warn you though, I have led a grueling life. A person such as yourself might be startled by the images put forth. Yet, it is something I must deal with, for I must get such things off my chest. It is not hard to say, perchance that I am confused on the matters at hand. Although I have lived through a lot, there are certain things I wish I had not lived through.

I was born, long ago in a castle. My tribe was known as the Featheracats, a type of feline that can transform into half-bird, half-cat, and half-human. We have the body of a human, with hands, and feet, and we stand upright like you human's do, but we also have large wings that break out from our back. This is a painful experience, but we learn to deal with it, just as if it were a normal thing. We have ears like felines, and a tail.

The Featheracats are quite intelligent. Despite that we lived long ago, we are extremely talented, and technologically advanced. My mother was the Queen of the Featheracats, and my father, the King. My father died when I was very young though, and the only memories I have of him are in my dreams, and when he appeared to me as a ghost once when I was going through a difficult time.

I've gone through lots of difficult times, and I've died more times than I even care to remember. But, thanks to one particular tom, I didn't stay dead long, Ever. It was as if I wasn't meant to die. And, even if I was, it wasn't going to happen. Every time I did die, I was brought back by my mate, Anubis, the God of The Dead. Yes, it's all coming together now, isn't it?

Well, I say I have gone through difficult times, and that is true. I suppose it would make more sense, though, if I explained in more detail. And frankly, that is what I plan to do.

"Stephanie. . . Stephanie!" my mate at the time yelled. My name was Stephanie then, as I still did not know that I was the Princess. I was young when I came here. . . to the present. His name was Otho, and, he was evil, though I did not know this at the time. I grinned as I came near, nuzzling him lightly,

"Otho. . my love." I replied, planting a light kiss on his lips.

Otho was a sweet tom, but he was using me. He wasn't really nice deep down. In fact, he was dark and cold, and once I realized it, he vowed to murder me. Needless to say, he never succeeded, and, he never will.

I had many mates. . . It seemed that I could never settle down, or rather, I was so deeply confused that I didn't know what love was. And, every time it came near, I felt threatened, and therefore, I shunned it, making up some lame excuse. Sometimes, even, the excuses were simply ludicrous all together. For a good while, I had myself convinced that I was lesbian, while on the contrary, I was just bisexual.

It was as though I couldn't get away from anything. Anything at all, no matter what. I had always found myself ordinary, and worthless. In fact, I was certain that the whole world would be better off if I was dead. Yet, the whole world didn't care if I died. They probably wouldn't even notice. Now, my friends, on the other hand, they would notice, and would miss me. I could not allow that to happen.

After Otho, I had another mate, but we were only together for a short while, because I found myself falling in love with a tom named Anubis. Now this feeling inside me was really love, and I felt it. My heart skipped a beat at the mere mention of his name. I felt my paws begin to tremble when he came near, and when he held me, nothing in the entire world mattered.

Anubis loved me like no one else ever loved me, and he cherished me like no one else could cherish me. He was my soul mate, I thought. We even had kittens together, but I left him because I thought I was lesbian. You see where that came in now, hmm?

I was determined to ruin my own life, because I was so afraid of love. I guess it was Otho that did it, and I still haven't forgotten, nor forgiven him for it. He betrayed my trust, but I suppose all evil cats do that. It's their lot in life, I suppose. Since then, I have vowed to rid the world of evil cats.

I met many cats over the years. Some nice, some. . . not so nice. The not so nice ones didn't live long after they came near me, or if they did live, they lived with scars and pain. I loved fights, and I still do. Everytime there was a fight, I wanted to be a part of it, and I usually ended up uninjured, or terribly injured. It was something I enjoyed. It was my escape. A place where I could take out all my hurt and pain, and it wouldn't matter, cause the cats I hurt. . . were out to hurt me anyways.

I always thought that if I fought hard enough, or not, that maybe I would be able to retire in time. Though, this thought was far in the back of my mind, and I rarely ever listened to that voice in my head. I fought, to fight. Because I could, and because it gave me a place to just let it all out. Though sometimes, I didn't care, and I didn't fight back, because I half-hoped they would just kill me. A few times, they succeeded.

Yet, each time they did succeed, I was brought back by Anubis. At one time, though, I would not allow him to bring me back. . .

"No, Anubis. . . I need to stay here for a while. I'm not ready to go back."

"I understand. . . But, we miss you. I miss you." he had said, moving closer. Despite that we were in the Land of the Dead, he could come near me, and, he did. He was a God, in more ways than one, and frankly, he still is. Although, that is not the point.

That time I had died in a terrible way, and my body was lost. I had purposely lost it, in some way, because I did not want to live again. Besides, when a body is so badly damaged, the soul can not return to it, because they will simply die again. So, if I was to come back, it would have to be in a new body, which is exactly what happened. Not that I minded, really. I would rather look as I do now, than as I did. I had managed to be 'born again' secretly, keeping it from Anubis, being the clever queen I was.

I had approached him, grinning,

"Do you like it?" I'd asked, draping my arms over his shoulders. He luckily recognized my voice and my eyes, so he smiled, wrapping his arms around my waist,

"You look great no matter what."

I chuckled and kissed him, gently massaging his neck with my paws. I loved my new look. I was red with black paws, yet I still had my green eyes, and the pentagram etching on my paws. I'd said I looked like a reverse Minifire(a queen I actually met later on) yet I still liked it.

It was rather wonderful to be back. I had needed my little break, but what I didn't need was what came next. . . Despite that I had found my dream tom, it seemed that I was falling for another tom, and I hated myself for it.

These sorts of things can leave an imprint on a cat, and it did. My love for Solid Snake grew stronger by the day, so I had to break free from it. I convinced myself that I was lesbian. He understood, I imagine, and I was soon chasing after a female named Idina. It wasn't long before I told Anubis, and we broke apart, but I soon realized that Idina didn't care for me. She had been gone for months almost, and when she returned, I broke it off with her. Not long after, a beautiful cloud leopard queen named Nebulosa approached me. She seemed to understand me, and she was kind and gentle.

I soon fell in love with the beautiful queen, but then, I could deal no longer with not seeing her often and I grew close with my close friend Cassanova. Nova was even more sweet, and even more gentle, yet I played with the thought of being with him. Once before, we had had sex together, as humans, after a trip on ecstasy. The remembrance of that night played over and over in my mind.

Nova and I worked together at a Bar, and we were both vampires. We were also able to turn from cat to human, and back again. Together, we danced on the bar, our bodies close to one another, the music playing over in our minds. To us, it was only a dance, but to the crowd, it seemed as though we were together. So, we played on that, teasing one another. Once, I got rather close to his face, acting as if I would kiss him, but then, I turned away. He smirked, but we soon got caught in the moment, and we actually did kiss. I loved it, his lips pressed close against mine, the whole rest of the room melting away as I found myself lost in his embrace.

Although, that night we exchanged touches, the boss was out of town, and we were soon in the back of the Bar, our clothes in crumpled heaps, and us on top of one another.

That night was only the start of many things. Nova fell in love with me, but I felt I couldn't give myself over to the feelings I had for him.

Anubis was captured, and near the point of death. I soon found myself falling for him again, and Nova hated me for it. I felt myself going back and forth between the two, confused about why I had these feelings, for I still thought I was lesbian. I had to talk to Nova, even if he hated me,

"Andy, go with the one that makes your heart skip a beat." he said. I thought about this for a few moments, then nodded, kissed his cheek and darted off.

I simply had to see Anubis before I made my decision, and our conversation lead to. . . more than that. Somehow, Cassanova found out, and he hated me even more,

"Andy. . . I thought you cared. . ."

"But I do, Nova! Please, just listen to me. . ."

"No, just go back to Anubis. Thats what you want, isn't it?!"

"No, actually, its not!" I sighed, turning from him, "I did love Anubis, and, I thought that my feelings for him were still there. Thats why I went to see him. To see if I really felt for him. But, I dont, I didn't. Well, Nova," I looked at him, smiling slightly, "You're the one that makes my heart skip a beat. . . Not Anubis."

Nova stared for a minute, then smiled and we kissed our most passionate kiss ever. I never will forget it, not that night. The memory of that night is etched into my mind like a wood carving.

I'd never been happier than I was when I was in Nova's embrace. We danced on the Bar better, we kissed deeper, and we moved closer. Life as I knew it had changed completely. It was as if the sun shone brighter, just for us. The stars, like tiny pinpricks in the sky, burning miles away, were bright in our eyes. Our love was like no love in the world, and when he held me, it felt as though I could melt away, and forget everything that existed. Every bad thing that happened around us didn't matter when we held one another, because we were in love.

Love was not a new experience to me, but love this deep and meaningful, I had never known it before. . . I had never known it was possible to be loved so deeply, and to love so deeply. Cassanova was perfect in every way, he could do no wrong, and I believed that he would never do wrong. I had to be wary though, for I had believed the same about my other mates, and we all know how that had turned out.

Nova and I were perfect for one another, but we kept growing seperate ways, and often times, we didn't see one another for months at a time. I was either protecting the Featheracats, for I was Queen now, or I was protecting something else. Nova was much the same way. I could deal no longer with not being loved, or, rather more corectly, not feeling love.

I, took my pain and anger to a human. . . A human that most of you should know. . . Yes, I know it sounds crazy, and I know that it was. I went to the past by using my powers, I became human, and I. . . went with Elvis. I am certain all you can do is laugh at me, and think I was crazy. Well, I know now that it was crazy, because I ended up pregnant. . . with a human child. I had ruined my life, and Nova's. . . So the next time I saw him, I told him, and we ended up breaking it off. I haven't seen him since.

Not long after the incident with Elvis, and the pregnancy, I was in a fight. The outcome: I was stabbed in the stomach, therefore loosing the child. It seemed as though fate wanted nothing to do with a child coming to life when it was conceived in the past by a now dead man. I cant say I blame them. In my idiocracy, I guess I decided that my sexual needs were more important than the point that by going into the past I could have altered the future. Like I said, it was crazy, but thats not important. Life was normal as it could be, one could imagine.









An Outsider's View:

Andreaste leaned against the warm brick wall in the ally, a young man standing before her. She spoke, her voice calm and collected, sounding slightly seductive,

"So. . . what's your name?"

The man studied her, his eyes looking over her thin, yet muscular body; her shapely hips, then up to her flat stomach, and finally her rounded, shaped breasts, then, he met her green, piercing eyes. He spoke, his voice low with a hint of an accent,

"My name's Antonio. What's yours, my pretty?"

He moved a hand to her side, then moved closer so one of her legs was between his. She smirked, but it wasn't genuine, though the man didn't seem to notice for he was looking over her body once again. She rolled her eyes, and put her hand on his chin, bringing his head up so she could look into his dark, brown eyes.

"Look, I'm not out here for sex. I'm here for blood. Particularly yours, and if you don't mind, I'd rather it if you didn't call me 'my pretty.' I don't belong to you, nor will I ever belong to you. If anything, it is you that will belong to me. Got it, Antonio?" she said, smirking. She then moved her leg against his inner thigh. "And, if you're thinking of running, or hurting me. . . Remember where my leg is. So, tell me, will you live with death?" she showed her fangs, and Antonio gasped, staring at her in shock, his eyes revealing his fear.

"You're. . . a. . . a. . . A VAMPIRE!!" he said, but Andreaste covered his mouth before he could scream any more.

"You make it sound SO terrible. . . But, yes, I am. And, you haven't answered my question! I'm not patient, An." she said, leaning against the wall more, but moving her leg up, causing Antonio to look a lot more uncomfortable.

"Oh God. . . I'll do it!! Please, don't kill me!!"

"Oh, I wont kill you, Antonio, dear. . . Though, I am kind of hungry." she laughed, and grabbed the back of his neck, pulling him forward, then, she sunk her fangs into his neck, drinking the cool, warm, dark red blood. She then pulled her fangs out, licking her lips before she spoke again.

"You wont die. . . I'll make sure of that."

Antonio gasped in pain, and he almost passed out,

"You're evil." he said weakly. Andreaste laughed softly, "Not entirely." she said, and picked him up, letting her wings come out from her back, then she flew to her apartment.

After this, Antonio and Andreaste became close friends, and one night, he asked her if she would probe his mind, and find out things about him. Frequently, Antonio had been forgetting things that had happened to him for moments at a time, and then finding lion fur in his bed when he awoke in the mornings. He found this rather curios and though Andreaste knew the reason for it, and assumed he did as well for he knew she could change into a cat, she decided to find out how he could do this.

Antonio watched Andy as she put a hand to his temples and began to look into his thoughts. His mind was full of dark, foggy images, yet one stood out; he was in a cage, and doctors surrounded him; they spoke:

"He may not live through this, but we must try. If we can succeed in making him human, then we can do anything." the first said

"It's not about him living. . . It's about making him normal. He's a lion, he's dangerous. . . As a human, he'd make a wonderful weapon." the other replied, a slight harshness in his voice. Tomasia sat by, waiting quietly, in her only form, a cat.

"You're right. . . Inject him." the first doctor said, adopting the same harshness as the first. The other doctor smiled sadistically and shot a liquid into Antonio, and he changed into a human before their eyes, but his memory is pushed into the depths of his mind in the process.

"They. . . wanted to make him a weapon. . . they said it didn't matter if he lived. . . I saw. . . I saw him change." she said, softly, to no reply from the others, except for a mere startled blink from Antonio as if he had known all along.