Disclaimer: No, but if they needs some writers let me know!

A/N: I'm not terrible good at humor but I read a fic a while back that made me LMAO and I just had to try some.

Sarah watched as their six month old tried to stand again. She was amazed at Mira's quick development. Splinter smiled. "I had forgotten how quickly my sons advanced." Mira grunted as she fell back on her bottom. It was also amazing how resilient she was.

Mira turned over and crawled to Sarah, who scooped her up. "Muh, muh."

Sarah cuddled her daughter, who looked so much like her mate. "That's my good girl. Are you ready to eat some lunch?"

"Muh, muh."

Splinter followed the two into the kitchen, where he found a seat at the table. Sarah handed him his grandchild. Mira cuddled into the warm fur of her grandfather.

"I'll get the formula." The formula wasn't milk it was a mixture that she and Donnie had come up with. It was a simple combination of meat proteins and vegetables ground into a paste. They had made several large jars full. She scooped a hefty size into a bowl. Her little turtle seemed to have an appetite that would match Mikey's any day.

Splinter held Mira as Sarah fed her. "She is remarkable. She reminds me so much of my sons when they were small."

Sarah laughed. "You must have really had your hands full. One turtle tot is enough. I can't imagine four."

"Muh, muh." Mira turned her head and looked at the door.

"Yes, Daddy is on his way home."

"It is amazing that she can sense the two of you." Splinter wiped some of the formula from Mira's chin.

"Donnie seems to think it's because he combined our DNA and although he only took small parts of mine that it caused Mira to pick up those specific to the bonding process."

"Do you think she will bond with a mate as you did with my son?"

Sarah thought that over for a moment. "No, it's different with her. What I sense from her is weaker. She seems to sense our emotions but I think it's more empathic than bonding. I don't think she will have the ability to bond properly."

Splinter seemed relieved by this information, perhaps because the bond already put two of his charges in danger. Mira gurgled and he turned her on her back to rub gently on her tummy. She gave a satisfying burp.

"Good one, little dudette." Mikey grinned as he and the others made their way into the kitchen.

"Uh, uh, uh!" Mira was already trying to pull herself up with edge of the table.

Donnie smiled as he entered, taking her from Splinter. "Have you been a good little girl?"

"Duh, duh, duh!" Mira babbled as she grabbed at her father's mask.

"And what about you?" Donnie teased as Sarah stood to greet him.

She grinned as she placed a warm kiss on his cheek. "I'm never good."

Raph chuckled as he tickled Mira's chin. "Hey, munchkin."

Leo was the last to show, a hand pressed over his left shoulder. He chuckled lightly at his family's banter, trying not to appear too bothered by the wound on his shoulder. But after years of seeing her boys come home hurt, Sarah had already spotted him and was moving in his direction. "It's nothing, just a scratch."

Sarah shook her head and pointed at the couch. "I'll be the judge of that." She turned to get the first aid kit from the bathroom.

Leo groaned and Mikey laughed. "You might as well go ahead, dude. You won't hear the end of it if you don't."

Donnie lifted his head from the probing fingers of his daughter. "Yeah, believe me I know."

Leo groaned again but resigned himself to Sarah's hands. He settled on the couch. "It really is just a scratch." He told her again as Sarah sat on the arm of the couch facing his shoulder.

"Leo, you know, even if it is just a scratch, we need to clean it. We can't risk any kind of infection."

Leo frowned but moved his hand to reveal two deep scratches. They weren't deep enough to need stitches but they did need to be cleaned. "So, want to tell me what's going on?"

Leo sighed. "Just some punks breaking into an electronics store. One got lucky."

Sarah frowned and Leo braced himself. He had an idea what was coming and he wasn't in the mood to explain. "You know darn well that is not what I meant. Leo, you've been moping around for weeks. You and me used to talk all the time, now you hardly say anything to any of us." He glanced at the kitchen out of the corner of his eye. She caught the glance and wasn't exactly sure how to take it. "Leo, are you jealous?"

He waved his hands defensively. "Oh, no! Not like that. Not of you and Donnie. I mean I….guess I've been feeling a little left out. Every time Donnie's not around Mira wants to go to Raph, and if Raph isn't around then Mikey takes off with her as soon as Donnie puts her down." He looked away with a slight blush. "I just want to spend time with her that's all."

Sarah broke into a big smile. "If that's all the problem is then I've got just the thing."

Leo looked a little frightened. "Now, Sarah don't go making a fuss about it…"

Sarah grinned mischievously. "No worries. You just gave me an excuse to spend some time alone with my hubby." She stood and called into the kitchen for her mate.

Donnie appeared still holding Mira, who was now trying her best to figure out what the belt was that lay across his chest. "What's going on?"

"Leo just made a great suggestion. He thought it might be good for us to get out. I hear they're playing some of Brahms' piano concertos in the park." She took Mira from her husband's bewildered arms and plopped her in Leo's lap. "Now, you be a good little girl for Uncle Leo."

Leo blinked down at the tot in his arms and Mira blinked back up at him. He couldn't resist the smile that crept across his lips. Sarah and Donnie had yet to leave them completely alone with their niece. Usually one or the other was close at hand at all times, even if they were just in the next room. So, this would be the first time both of Mira's parents would be gone at the same time. He'd be the first one to truly keep Mira on his own.

"Wait a minute. How come Leo gets to watch her?" Raph protested.

"Yeah, she likes it best when I read her my comic books." Mikey folded his arms over his chest.

Sarah ignored their protest and smiled at Leo. "She's already been fed so she may take a nap in a little while. We won't be too long." She turned and took Donnie's hand leading him out of the lair. The still confused turtle followed his mate into the tunnels beyond. When they were far enough away that they couldn't be heard, she stopped.

"So, what was that about?"

"Leo thought Mikey and Raph were hogging Mira, so I just thought he'd like to babysit for an hour or two. Besides," she wrapped her arms around his neck, "I think I'd like to have you all to myself for a little while." She kissed him deeply. He pulled her to him wrapping her tightly in his warmth.

"Good idea." He said huskily as she pressed her body to his in just the right places. "Really, really good idea."

Mira looked at the entrance to the lair. She could sense her parents not far away and they were happy. But why had they left? Usually her daddy would stay and play with her after he got home from wherever it was he went. She looked back up at the blue masked uncle that held her. He was arguing with her other uncles. The one that wore orange always smelled like candy and read her lots of funny books. The other one was the one that brought her presents and made her feel extra safe. But this one that wore blue she wasn't so sure of. He always seemed tense. Was it something she'd done? Did she make him unhappy? Mira looked at the door and then at Leo and proceeded to wail.

The three brothers looked down at her in surprise. It was rare to hear her cry and it was definitely something they didn't like. "What did you do, Leo?" Raph groused taking a few steps forward.

"I didn't do anything."

"Maybe, you're holding her wrong." Mike started forward as well.

"I am not. You guys back off. Donnie and Sarah left me in charge. I can handle this." Leo blinked down at the tot that was still wailing with a bit of dismay. Now, how exactly was he supposed to do that? He put her to his shoulder and rubbed her shell gently. "It's alright Mira. Mommy and Daddy will be back in a little while. Uncle Leo's got you." Still she wailed. Okay, plan B. He got up and walked her around the room. The wail quieted slightly but didn't cease.

Raph frowned. He couldn't stand to see his munchkin cry. "I'll take her."

Leo shook his head. No, he wasn't giving her up that easily. That's when he spotted the art book on the coffee table. He turned her around and cradled her in the crook of his arm. "Let's look at some pictures, Mira." He sat down on the couch and opened the book with his free hand. Mira fell silent for a moment as he slowly flipped through the pages, but just as he was about to say told-you-so, she began a new onslaught of cries.

Splinter entered the room, his ears pressed back against his head. "Leonardo, what is going on? Why is Mira crying?"

"Everything's fine Master. I don't think she likes Sarah being gone."

"I don't think she likes you." Raph grumbled. "Maybe, I should call Cat or April to come help."

"Would you like my help, my son?" Splinter offered speaking a little louder to be heard.

Leo shook his head. "No, I've got everything under control." He cringed as Mira began again. "Wait I've got an idea." He smiled as he headed for his room.

Donnie paused in his exploration of Sarah's neck to listen to Mira cry. He wondered if anything was wrong. Sarah caught his face in her hands. "She's fine. They're just getting acquainted. Besides, Splinter is there, it'll be fine." She kissed him drawing him back into the moment. There was a moment of silence and then more crying.

"Maybe we should go check on her?"

Sarah shook her head. "I promise she's fine." After a few more moments there was silence again and this time it lasted. "See?" She teased. He growled playfully, pressing her back into the mattress with his strong yet gentle hands to begin exploring his mate's even more sensitive areas. They had only made it as far as their secret spot before desires had overwhelmed them.

Leo sat Mira on the floor of his alcove and took out his paint set. The tot watched him with curiosity as he laid a large piece of paper in front of her and then settled on the floor placing her in his lap. "Now watch Mira." He took a brush and dipped it in a small jar of blue paint. The little turtled watched as he painted a flower.

She was fascinated. "Buh. buh." She tried to take the brush from him.

"You want to try?" He let her hold the end as he controlled the strokes as he painted another flower. He grinned when she smiled at him. "This isn't so hard."

No sooner had the words left him then Mira had reached down and grabbed the small jar of paint, dumping it all over her plastron. "Oh, no." Before Leo could stop her she'd already stuck her hands in and rubbed it on her face.

Mira laughed as Leo groaned. "We'd better get you cleaned up before your Mama sees you like that." Leo got up and carried her to the kitchen where Mikey was making a pizza.

"Dude, what happened?"

"It's just paint." Leo handed her to Mikey. "Watch her while I get a wash cloth."

Mikey grinned. "Sure." He sat her on the floor next to him as Leo left the room. "Uncle Mikey is making a pizza. Want to help little dudette?"

Mira grinned and pulled herself up on Mikey's leg. She couldn't see much from down there. Mikey put a little more flower on the table as he began to knead the pizza dough. "Mi, mi, mi." Mira pulled at Mikey's knee pad.

"What kind of toppings should we put on it this time? What do you think Mira?"

"Mi, mi, mi." Mira reached out and grabbed the tablecloth trying to pull herself up to see what he was doing. Unfortunately, the bag of flour was sitting close to the edge and it toppled over.

Mikey caught the dough before it followed. "That was close. I-Uh, oh."

"Uh, oh what?" Leo appeared in the doorway with a wash cloth, which was now basically useless. "Mikey!" Mira sat on the floor covered from head to toe in flour.

"What? I didn't do it, she did." Mikey sputtered as he looked down at his niece. Mira giggled happily as she rubbed her fingers in the new substance.

Leo groaned. "Now you're going to need a bath, Mira-chan." He picked her up and headed for the bathroom after popping his brother on the head for good measure. He sat her on the warm rug. "You stay there, Mira. Let me start the water." Leo started the water, testing it to make sure it wasn't too hot or cold. He turned around to see that Mira had completely unrolled the toilet paper and was headed for the living room. "Oh, no you don't." He scooped her back up and placed her in the water which wasn't more than an inch deep. She examined the water with curiosity and began splashing. Although sitting up wasn't normally an issue for her as her shell helped keep her upright, Leo was sure to keep a steadying hand on her.

Looking around he realized that all Mira's bath supplies were in Donnie and Sarah's bathroom. So he settled on the bottle of shower gel that Mikey used. Releasing her momentarily to squeeze some onto the washcloth, he began scrubbing the blue paint from her plastron. Mira giggled happily as she splashed the water with both hands. Leo smiled. He cleaned her hands, shoulders, and legs. And then moved on to her little round head. "This isn't so tough."

He realized his mistake shortly before she started shrieking. The soap had flowed down into her eyes. Leo cringed. "I've really got to stop saying stuff like that."

Raph graced the doorway. "What are you doin', Leo?" He could tell it wasn't a cry like earlier this was one that meant she was hurt. He pushed past his brother and took her from the water.

"Raph, I'm not done washing her off."

Raph grabbed a towel from the rack and began wiping her eyes then wrapping her in it. "She's clean enough." Mira sniffled, tears still streaming her cheeks although the initial howling had ceased. "Sarah didn't say anything about you givin' her a bath anyway."

"She was dirty. Mikey dumped half a bag of flour on her." He took the tot from his brother. "How about we watch some TV?" He asked the little turtle.

"Tuh, tuh." Mira said with a little less enthusiasm.

Leo carried her into the living room and sat her on the floor next to the TV where her blocks were stacked. Mira smiled and began grabbing the blocks. Leo settled on the couch and flipped through the channels. Raph decided he might want to keep an eye on Mira himself so he settled into the arm chair. He'd already texted Cat and asked her to head home from the garage. He had a feeling they might need some backup.

Sarah raised her head slightly from where it rested on Donnie's chest. Mira was in pain but it had only lasted a moment. Donnie stirred beside her. He opened drowsy eyes to gaze at her. "Is something wrong?"

She shook her head slowly. "No, it's alright."

He turned onto his side, pulling her closer, burying his nose in her hair. "Are you sure?"

His breath was warm and she sighed at the sensation. "Yes." She drew back enough to look into his gentle eyes. "We'll have to go back soon."

He smiled. "Yeah, I know but not just yet." He met her lips, kissing her deeply and completely. Sarah responded in kind slipping her arms around his neck and drawing him closer. He couldn't suppress the little gasp when she slipped her hands inside the edge of his shell, rubbing tenderly on the sensitive flesh. He released her lips to whisper softly in her ear. "I love you."

"And I love you." She placed some kisses along his neck before meeting his lips again. She drank in his deep scent that reminded her so much of a forest in the springtime. Her fingers roamed the large muscles of his arms and shoulders. Oh, how they made her feel so secure and safe. And just for a little while longer she could have him all to herself.

Leo found some wrestling on the television, which was a usual compromise for Raph and him. Mira played contentedly on the floor for about three minutes before she spotted something moving in the corner. She glanced up at her babysitters who were presently very interest in the TV. They wouldn't be any help finding out what that thing was. So she decided to investigate herself. She crawled over and watched it wiggle for a few moments before placing it in her mouth.

She crawled back to her blocks with a mouth full. Raph's eyes went wide. "Uh, Leo what is that in her mouth?"

Leo jumped to his feet and ran over. He tried to stay calm. "Mira, you need to let Uncle Leo see what you have in your mouth." Mira made a face but wouldn't open her mouth. "Please open up." Instead of complying with her uncle she promptly chewed and swallowed.

"Uh, oh. I hope that wasn't something she shouldn't have ate."

"Where did you get that from?" Leo asked trying not to completely freak out about the fact that she might have ate something not so – well, eatable.

Mira pointed to the corner where she'd seen the wiggly thing. She didn't understand what they were upset about. It tasted just like her formula. Both Leo and Raph went to the corner. There was a place where the wall had begun to crumble a bit leaving a pile of dirt. Upon seeing a worm crawling through it, they had a pretty good idea. Raph gaged. "You think she ate one of those?"

Although they were turtles eating bugs and worms was not something they did on any regular basis, not when there were a lot better options. Leo picked up the worm and showed it to Mira. "Did you eat one of these?" Mira smiled and tried to grab it. "I guess that's a yes." He shrugged. "I don't know whether to be worried or relieved."

Mikey entered and placed the still hot pizza on the coffee table. "Alright guys, this is going to be awesome. It's a jalapenos and anchovies with extra chocolate sauce."

Mira crawled to the coffee table and pulled herself up. She peered down at the pizza with interest. Leo caught her hand as it reached for the unfamiliar food. "No, no Mira it's very hot. You'll burn yourself."

"Besides aren't you full of worm now?" Raph smirked.

Leo glared at him. "You were watching her too."

Mikey's eyes went wide in disgust. "You let her eat a worm? Eewww!"

"This coming from the guy that likes jalapenos and anchovies with chocolate sauce." Raph remarked, folding his arms over his chest. "I'd say at least it was healthier than the junk you eat, Mikey."

Mira had lost interest in the pizza momentarily to watch Mikey sip at his soda. "Uh, uh, uh." She tried to reach it, pulling herself up on Mikey's knee.

"Are you thirst, Mira?" Leo asked.

"She probably wants something to wash the worm down with." Raph snickered. Mira pointed up at the soda.

Leo shot Raph another unamused glare. Turning back to Mira, he patted her on the head. "I'll get you something to drink." He went to the kitchen to retrieve the cup with a straw that they used for her. After filling it with some apple juice, he returned to find that Mira had something new in her mouth. "Guys were you watching her?"

Raph glanced at the little turtle. "She's been right here the whole time. I didn't see her get anything."

Mikey shook his head. "I didn't give her anything."

But Mira was defiantly chewing on something. She'd chew, make a face, chew some more and make another face. Leo sat back down beside his brothers, looking around to see if he could spot what she might have picked up. The culprit was soon discovered. Beneath the coffee table was the bottom portion of a slice of pizza. Mira had obviously scooped off the top and stuffed it in her mouth without her uncles seeing. Leo glanced back at his niece whose eyes were starting to water. "Uh, oh. This is not going to be good." Mira swallowed and turned a funny shade of yellow-green. "Mikey, she got a hold of your pizza."

Mikey grinned. "Maybe she liked it." The little tot's response to that was to begin to cry, rubbing at her tummy. Leo opened his mouth to call for Master Splinter but there was no time, as everything she had just swallowed came right back up. The three brothers gaged as their feet were covered in the nasty smelly contents of the baby's stomach.

Mira fell backwards on her bottom and began to grin. She felt relieved and her tummy no longer hurt. Splinter entered, his gaze falling immediately on the mess before him. "My goodness, what is going on?"

"It seems Mikey's pizza didn't settle too great with Mira." Leonardo explained.

"Maybe it was the worm." Mikey retorted.

Leo picked up the little turtle covered in vomit. "I guess this means bath number two."

Raph stood up. "No way! You already got soap in her eyes! I'll take her."

Splinter stopped them with a raised hand. "I will take her. I suggest you three clean up this mess."

The turtles had just finished cleaning up the floor when Sarah and Donnie appeared in the entrance. They looked particularly revitalized and content. A stark contrast to the others who were now looking very tired.

Sarah looked around. "Don't tell me you guys lost her?"

Splinter chuckled as he emerged from the bathroom a clean Mira wrapped in a towel. "She is right here."

"Muh, muh!" Mira waved her arms happy to see her parents.

Sarah took her from Splinter. "I hope she wasn't too much trouble while we were gone." She glanced at Leo.

He smiled. "No, not at all."

"A perfect little angel." Mikey agreed.

"Yeah, she ain't been no trouble at all." Raph said with a grin.

A/N: I thought about putting a poopy diaper incident in here, but couldn't fit it anywhere. I may put it in a later fic.