Dear Dad,

I would apologize that this has been done with a letter, and not in person. But I'm going to have be honest with you and tell you that I cannot even look you in the eye anymore. To say I'm devastated is almost glib. I don't think that they've invented a word in any language to explain the emotion I'm feeling.

You robbed me, Dad. You broke me.

There is a ragged bleeding hole where you ripped away the best part of me. That's something I know that you can't understand. While you are biologically my father, you were never really one and we both know it.

Mum used to say that you'd never cared about anyone but yourself, that she knew that you would drop us and run away the instant that doctor you were always on about showed up. She resented you, I'm not sure if you knew that. I could never forget it. You would leave and we would wait for it to be the time you just never came back.

It was easy for you, wasn't it? I don't think you even cried when she was dead, did you? Do you feel anything at all? I always doubted you were even human, even as a child I thought you had to be alien. There was no warmth to you at all, you never touched Mum and I unless you had to.

Family ends with DNA with you. I've always known this. So the worst thing, Dad, is that while you have destroyed me, I can't even be surprised.

I feel like I should scream at you that he was your blood, he was your grandson, that he was the reason I got up in the morning. But that would be about as effective as trying to control when the sun sets.

But I will tell you this. He was the only family I ever had, my Steven. He was perfect, and beautiful. I wanted him to have everything I never had with you, Dad. I wanted him to have a safe, normal home, parents who adored him, to grow up without the shadow of your Torchwood hanging over him like I did. I loved him from the moment he was just a heartbeat inside of me. I put all of my love and my life into that wonderful little boy, and now I've nothing left.

There's no love left in me at all. All I have is hate and anger, all the way into my bones.

I close my eyes at night and all I can see is my broken little boy staring into nothing.

So I'm going away, Dad, as far away from you as I can get. This letter will be the last that you ever hear from me. I would kill you if I could, but we both know how effective that is. Have you ever thought that maybe that doctor of yours never was around because he knew what you were? A monster?

I don't imagine that my leaving is going to even effect you. You'll just continue to go through your innumerable years, destroying anyone who gets in the way of what benefits you the most. But I thought you should know, that I won't be there to be another of your casualties any longer.

Besides, how could you ruin me any further?

Goodbye Dad,
Alice.