Author's Note: This poem by Robert Browning has always been one of my favourites, and as I was looking through my book of favourite quotes for inspiration, I stumbled upon this one and thought how perfect it would be for a Jake and Bella story. Ageing was something that Bella was always afraid of, so I thought I would write something along the lines of how Jacob changed that.....Hope you enjoy:)
Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer.
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Grow old along with me!
The best is yet to be,
The last of life for which
The first was made:
Our times are in His Hand
Who saith, "A whole I planned,
Youth shows but half; trust God:
See all, nor be afraid!"
~Robert Browning~
Bella used to think that ageing was a curse, something to be put off and avoided at all costs. When you are in love with a vampire who is permanently and gloriously seventeen, age has the appearance of an inexorable enemy, creeping up on you slyly, softly, subtly. It wraps itself around you like a wispy, grey cloak and whispers tauntingly in your ear. And one day, you wake up and….you are not young anymore. You look in the mirror and there are lines where there were no lines before. Your eyes look tired, dull somehow, your face worn and sagging. There is a hint of white in your hair where before was nothing but brown. And with a sinking heart you realise that life has passed like sands through an hourglass and you didn't even notice.
Yes, in the past, age was an enemy to be fought off with all the strength one had. Every birthday that passed on which she was still aging, still human, felt like a tiny failure, another trickle of sand through the hourglass. Lost time.
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But that was many years ago. When Bella was still young and foolish and thought that forever would be the ultimate paradise. She knew otherwise now.
It had taken her a long time to get used to the idea of mortality after Edward had left her. A long, painful time in which she internally kicked and screamed and cried like a toddler whose parent had refused to buy it an ice-cream. Yes, she could think of her behaviour in such juvenile terms now. Because it had been juvenile. And she could marvel now at the patience and courage of her best friend who had stuck by her and loved her and shown her how to live again when she had given up on life, when all she wanted was death because her forever had been taken from her. He it was who showed her that there was a life worth living even without Edward, even if it meant she had to grow old and die one day. But even more than that, he did what she once would have thought impossible. He turned age from an enemy to a friend.
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She remembered very clearly the exact moment that Jacob Black managed to completely turn around her outlook on life. They were standing together on a beach, facing each other before God and man and as he repeated the words "till death do us part", all the while looking deeply into her eyes, something changed inside her. She didn't realise what it was at first; she just knew that she felt….lighter somehow. Happier. Readier to face the life ahead, be it long or be it short. Because she knew that she wouldn't be facing it alone – they would be growing old together.
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And now Bella found that when she woke up on her birthday morning, instead of feeling a settling dread in the pit of her stomach, she felt joy. Because as she looked in the mirror and saw the added lines, the streaks of grey, all she had to do was look at the man behind her to see the same changes mirrored on his face. Suddenly age was not a fearful bridge to be traversed alone, for she had a friend right beside her, holding her hand the whole time, encouraging her as they crossed it together. And each line, each white hair, had a story, a past. They had not appeared overnight as she had used to believe. Rather they had come gradually over time, a line here, a grey hair there. This line was for when their little daughter Sarah had been very ill that one summer; these ones for when Charlie passed away; those grey hairs for when Jacob's business was struggling – each and every one of them had a history; a past that they had shared and fought through together. And whilst the stories were often sad and did not always have happy endings, each time they had come through it together, a little stronger, a little wiser, a little closer as a result, was a small victory.
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Bella used to think that aging was a curse, something to be put off and avoided at all costs. But as she sat next to her husband with her daughter and son-in-law across the room and a grandchild on each knee, she knew that it was a blessing. It was a different time of life, it is true, and it was not always easy, but with her best friend by her side to go through it with her and hold her hand through the tough moments, she knew she need not be afraid.
A/N: So, what did you think?? Please review and tell me your thoughts!