A/N: Just fixed the breaks, saw them and realized they were fucking annoying.
Her Idiot
**The Legend of Zelda franchise and its characters are owned by Nintendo, not by me…
A shrill voice pierced the afternoon air.
"Link, get down here right now or I'm gonna kick your ass!"
Link stirred. What could Tetra want this time? He was in the middle of such a nice nap too…
He felt someone jab his stomach. Link groaned and slowly opened his eyes. Niko was hunched over him, trying to wake him up. He sat up, groaning.
"Dammit, Niko, not you too…What the hell does she want from me, anyway?"
Niko laughed sheepishly. "I have no idea. It's just that if you don't go down there she'll probably kill me too."
Yep, that was Tetra. She was Link's age, but everyone was afraid of her, since she had a very short fuse and as the fearsome pirate captain of the ship, she was an awfully tough cookie.
Link was probably the only one who could escape her full wrath, and that was because he had saved her life on several occasions. And even the Hero of Winds sometimes couldn't deal with her. Linksighed and got up slowly, hoping that this wasn't one of those times.
"LINK! IF YOU DON'T GET DOWN HERE THIS INSTANT-"
"Okay, okay, Tetra! Don't get your panties all twisted in a knot! I'm coming!"
Link realized that was a very bad thing to say. As he entered her room, Tetra slapped Link in the face with enough force to send him flying into the wall.
"Ow…" Link peeled himself off the floor.
"Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you, Link, I tell you keep lookout and what do you do? You fall asleep! And it's not the first time, either!" Tetra scolded.
Link held up his arms in protest. "I thought Niko was the one who was on lookout duty!"
Tetra crossed her arms across her chest. "No, Link. He was cleaning the toilets! Is that what you'd rather do?"
Link shuddered. The toilets on a pirate ship… Well you can say they were not exactly hygienic.
"No…"
"Link! Can't you stay alert for even a few hours? I don't ask you to steer the ship, to cook dinner, or to do anything like that! All I want you to do is to look out for things! Or is the Hero too dumb to doeven that?"
Link pouted. "But Tetra…"
"BUT NOTHING!" Tetra exploded. "ALL YOU EVER DO IS SIT ON YOUR LAZY ASS ALL DAY! WHY DON'T YOU EVER TAKE ANY RESPONSIBILITY AROUND HERE? DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED BECAUSE YOU
FELL ASLEEP? WE CRASHED RIGHT INTO A REEF! YOU'RE LUCKY THAT MY BOAT DIDN'T SINK!"
"Wait, what? Where are we going now, then?"
"TO GET IT FIXED, YOU DUMBASS!"
Link recoiled in fear. Tetra often got mad, but you wouldn't want to be around when she REALLY got pissed. Link sighed. He had to calm her down, or else he wouldn't be escaping without severe bodily harm.
"I'm sorry I fell asleep, Tetra… It's just… I was preoccupied."
Tetra was still fuming. "What the hell could you be thinking about? You're always daydreaming, too!" she snapped.
"Uh…you."
"What?"
"I was thinking of you."
"Oh. Wait. WHAT?"
"Yes, I know it's hard to believe, but I was thinking of you," Link grinned now, rather cheekily.
Tetra slapped him again. "Pervert!"
"N-no, Tetra! It's not like that! I was thinking about how pretty you looked yesterday, when we all went into town and you were dressed in that skirt and your hair was really nice and you looked really sexy-"
Tetra interrupted him. "Link…" she said. "Do you really think that way about me?"
Link's eyes widened. "Well, yeah, I mean, you're gorgeous, and you're a good person, although sometimes you're also a total bit-" Tetra punched him.
"Sorry! I'm sorry! Don't hurt me!" Link apologized profusely, clutching his face and curling up into a ball.
"Link…" Tetra said his name. Link was now wailing and sucking his thumb, locked in the fetal position.
"Link!" Tetra said louder. Link was now rolling around and crying for his mommy.
"LINK!" Tetra shouted. "What?" Link cried.
"Apology accepted." Link uncovered his face and opened his eyes, and was very shocked to see Tetra's face so close to his. Link blushed. She was so beautiful…
Tetra leaned in, and her lips met his. Link was flabbergasted at first but then kissed back. They broke apart from each other, faces both flushed.
"So…what does this mean?" Link broke the silence. "You know… for us…"
"It means that you'll get back upstairs and scrub the deck," Tetra replied nonchalantly.
"WHAT?"
"Yeah, you heard me, now get your lazy ass upstairs."
"Fine…"
"If you do a good job, I'll reward you."
"With what?"
"You'll see." Tetra smiled. "And this is to make up for hitting you earlier." Tetra swooped in and kissed Link again. Link was in heaven; the feeling of her soft lips against his was just…indescribable.
"They're just as sweet as I thought they would be…"He loved her so much…and she loved him back. It was a great feeling. Link felt her tongue pushing against his lips, requesting entrance. He obliged her, and they made out passionately.
CLICK.
The flustered couple quickly broke apart. Standing in the doorway was Tetra's pirate crew. Mako was holding a camera.
"Link… do you know what this means?"
"What, Tetra?"
"Something very, very unfortunate is going to happen to a bunch of goons that I happen to know quite well."
Link sweatdropped. The crew took off running.
"GIVE ME THE CAMERA! I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU GUYS!" Tetra shouted and chased after them.
Link grinned to himself. Good ol' Tetra. It had been a boring day, but now Link was sure that this was the best day of his life. He had gotten his first kiss from the girl of his dreams, and now, since Tetra was busy trying to murder her crew for interrupting their private moment, he could slack off from his duties again. Life was good. Link plopped down onto Tetra's bed, which was much more comfortable than his own lumpy cot. Oh well, I don't think Tetra will mind.Not long after, he was asleep.
Tetra stepped back into her room. She had, to say the least, given her "loyal crew" a piece of her mind. How dare they impede on their captain's privacy like that! As a result, Mako's camera was now
somewhere at the bottom of the ocean. Tetra looked at the blond haired boy sleeping soundly on her bed. She couldn't help but smile.
"Idiot," she mumbled. Honestly, he was the only one she knew that could make her feel so wanted, so loved. And she could never stay mad at him for long. Yawning, Tetra took off her boots and lay down next to Link. She hugged him, pulling him close and squeezing him like a teddy bear. "Link…you may be an idiot, but you're my idiot." At that moment, Link smiled in his sleep and hugged her back.
Yes indeed, he was her idiot.
THE END