Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, Hetalia, or the Princess Bride. I'm too lame. :/

The young blonde grumbled about his ailments, burrowing further beneath the thick comforters tucked around him as he tried to ignore the dull ache coursing throughout his body and the relentless chills. Being sick was never fun - especially not for a twelve-year-old boy. If not for the terrible dizziness that overtook him if he sat up straight or the waves of nausea that would strike without warning, then Peter Kirkland would most definitely be taking advantage of this; after all, what kid didn't want days out of school to slack and play video games? Peter couldn't even find it in himself to groan and turn his back to the door as he heard it creak open; leave it to his mom to come and harass him as he lay in anguish….or even worse, his dad.

"Peter, how are you feeling?"

The child rolled his bright blue eyes dramatically at his ceiling, using every ounce of strength (that wasn't running his mouth or producing witty backtalk) into rolling onto his side to face his mother.

"How do I look, mom?"

Silence settled over the room quickly as the individual in the door shifted nervously.

"I've told you, Peter…I'm not your mom. I'm a boy."

"Yeah, whatever, Mom."

The poor, uncomfortable man sighed, but plowed right past his "son's" terse replies and onto the subject that brought him here in the first place. Other than, of course, maternal concern.

"Um, well...Berwald has a story that he wants to read to you. You know, to help you feel better," Peter's "mother" stated as he settled himself carefully on the edge of the bed, patting the ill boy's leg with what he hoped was a comforting "it really sucks to be you right now, even if you can be a brat" smile.

"Whoa. Dad can read? Really?"

A thoughtful expression flashed across the Finnish man's face before he replied, "Well, he picked out a book for me to read to you."

Peter frowned, drawing a quick "But that's not a nice thing to say about Berwald at all! Mind your manners, Peter" from a rather distraught Fin.

"L'sten t' y'r m'th'r."

As if on cue, Berwald appeared in the doorway with an old volume tucked beneath his arm, lips pressed into a thin line as he nodded curtly at his "wife's" sheepish smile. The towering Swede wasted no time in joining the pair on the bed, gently placing the book in his partner's lap.

With another roll of his eyes, Peter mumbled, "this should be fun." Both parents gave him a rather upset look.

"Sh'ld I g't the b'x, Tino?"

"No…let's just read him the story," Tino replied a little apprehensively.

Peter slipped further beneath his covers, more than a little worried about being put in his box, again; after expressing his (rather odd and ill-placed) hatred of England, his adoptive father decided it to be a good idea for his time-outs to be spent under a box with "England" written across it. "Let's just let mom read," the child whined from below his snug barrier.

Berwald ducked his head, leaning towards Tino as he mumbled in a low voice. The latter nodded and smiled, lifting the novel and staring intently at the cover.

"Berwald says that this is a special book that will make you feel better if you read it enough. Everyone is his family read it to each other when they were sick, and now h- we can read it to you. He thinks you'll really enjoy it, Peter; it has all of the things you like!"

"So it has sports and the ocean and cool things like that?"

"Of course! Even pirates and monsters, since we know you love them so much."

The twelve-year-old sighed, shifting ever so slightly as he made himself more comfortable. "I guess it won't be too lame, then," he mused as he turned full attention to his mother-that-wasn't-a-woman.

Tino smiled again, apparently not at all bothered by Peter's lack of enthusiasm.

"Alright, Peter. The Prince's Bride, by M. Williams…chapter one."

Oh dear lord what have I done. I...huh. I'm not sure what on earth possessed me to write this, other than the encouragement of my two friends and my intense love for both Hetalia and this movie? Auugh, I don't quite know where I'm going with this, but I do have the characters assigned. I refused to start until that was done, lol. Some of them may be painfully obvious, but please work with me.

I'm doing my best to be original and add my own spin on this, while staying true to the script of the movie. I'm not quite sure how that's going to work out, or if I'll even finish. If this is interesting enough for others, chances are that I'll finish.

I know that, unfortunately, a lot of this characters are going to end up seeming incredibly OOC. I ask for your forgiveness, and that you please understand that I need to work with what I'm given. While I will try to work their canon and headcanon personalities into this, I also have the personalities of the movie's characters to stay true to, as well. Hopefully, you find that my selections for each character are tolerable for matching the personalities as best I can. And while this is not an excuse, it is also my first time writing as a majority of these characters, and I'm still trying to get a feel for them.

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed~

Turoruuuuuu