Disclaimer - I do not own VA or any of its characters. I also do not own any of the story from frost bite in this.

Okay everyone. SO this is my first Vampire Academy story. So I hope you guys like it.

My close friend WishIWasRose was talking to me when I thought up this story. So I hope you all like it because she did.

So Enjoy!

XOXO

Chapter 1

I headed out toward the back of the lodge, away from all the activity.

The hall eventually ended, but a door lading to some stairs sat on the left. The door was unlocked, so I followed the stairs upward to another door. To my pleasure, it opened up onto a small rooftop deck that didn't appear to see much use.

A blanket of snow lay over it all, but it was early morning out here, and the sun shone brightly, making everything glitter.

I brushed the snow off of a large, box-like object that looked to be part of the ventilation system. Heedless of my dress, I sat down on it. Wrapping my arms around myself, I stared off, taking in the view and the sun I rarely got to enjoy.

I was startled when the door opened a few minutes later. When I looked back I was even more startled to see Dimitri emerge. My heart gave a small flutter, and I turned away, unsure what to think. His boots crunched in the snow as he walked over to where I was sitting. A moment later, he took off his long coat and draped it over my shoulders.

He sat down beside me. "You must be freezing."

I was, but I didn't want to admit it. "The sun's out."

He tipped his head back,, looking up at the perfect blue sky. I knew he missed the sun as much as I did sometimes. "It is. But we're still on a mountain in the middle of winter."

I didn't answer. We sat there in a comfortable silence for a while. Occasionally, a light wind blew clouds of snow around.

I was night for Moroi, and most would be going to bed soon, so the ski runs were quiet.

"My life is a disaster." I finally said.

"It is not a disaster." He said automatically.

"Did you follow me from the party?"

"Yes."

"I didn't even know you were there." His dark clothes indicated that he must have been on guardian duty at the party. "So you saw the illustrious Janine cause a commotion by dragging me out."

"It wasn't a commotion. Hardly anyone noticed. I saw you because I was watching you."

I refused to let myself get excited over that. "That's not what she said." I told him. "I might as well have been working in a corner as far as she was concerned."

I relayed the conversation from the hallway.

"She's just worried about you." Dimitri said when I finished.

"She overreacted."

"Sometimes mothers are overprotective."

I stared at him. "Yeah, but this is my mother. And she didn't seem that protective, really. I think she was more worried I'd embarrass her or something. And all that becoming a-mother-too-young stuff was stupid. I'm not going to do anything like that."

"Maybe she wasn't talking about you." He said.

More silence. My jaw fell open.

You don't have the life experience for it – you haven't even lived your own life yet. You won't be able to do the kind of job you wish you could.

My mum had been twenty when I was born. Growing up, that had always seemed really old to me. But now... that was only a few years off for me. Not old at all. Did she think she'd had me too soon? Had she done a shoddy job raising me simply because she didn't know any better at the time? Did she regret the way things had turned out between us? And was it... was it maybe possible that she'd had some personal experience of her own with Moroi men and people spreading rumours about her?

I'd inherited a lot of her features. I mean, I'd even noticed tonight what a nice figure she had. She had a pretty face too – for a nearly forty-year-old, I mean. She'd probably been really, really good-looking when she was younger...

I sighed. I didn't want to think about that. If I did, I might have to re-evaluate my relationship with her – maybe even acknowledge my mother as a real person – and I already had too many relationships stressing me. Lissa always worried me, even though she seemed to be okay for a change. My so-called romance with Mason was in shambles. And then, of course, there was Dimitri...

"We aren't fighting right now." I blurted out.

He gave me a sidelong look. "Do you want to fight?"

"No. I hate fighting with you. Verbally, I mean. I don't mind in the gym."

I thought I detected the hint of a smile. Always a half-smile for me. Rarely a full one. "I don't like fighting with you either."

Sitting next to him there, I marvelled at the warm and happy emotions springing up inside of me. There was something happy about being around him that felt so good, that moved me in a way Mason couldn't.

You can't force love, I realized. It's there or it isn't. If it's not there, you've got to do whatever it takes to protect the ones you love.

The next words that came out of my mouth astonished me, both because they were completely unselfish and because I actually meant them.

"You should take it."

He flinched. "Take what?"

"Tasha's offer. You should take her up on it. It's a really great chance."

I remembered my mum's words about being ready for children. I wasn't. Maybe she hadn't been. But Tasha was. And I knew Dimitri was too. They got along really well. He could go be her guardian, have some kids with her... it would be a good deal for both of them.

"I never expected to hear you say anything like that." He told me voice tight. "Especially after-"

"What a bitch I've been? Yeah." I tugged his coat tighter against the cold. It smelled like him. It was intoxicating, and I could half-imagine being wrapped up in his embrace. Adrian might have been onto something about the power of scent. "Well. Like I said, I don't want to fight anymore. I don't want us to hate each other. And... Well..." I squeezed my eyes shut and then opened then. "No matter how I feel about us... I want you to be happy."

"But..." He said. I noticed then that my chest hurt. "Rose, I did take Tasha's offer. I told her the other day."

My heart felt like it was being ripped out of my chest. Every word that he had said had burned into my brain.

"You're going with her?" I choked out.

"Yes." He responded simply.

"Then go. Right now, go. There's nothing left for us, so please just go." I said as I dropped his jacket on the box and ran into the building.

I was too upset to go and look for anyone. I didn't even feel anything for anyone anymore. My heart had been shattered into a million pieces and it felt like no one would be able to fix it.

With the tears running down my face, I didn't want to return to the party so I continued to my room. My feet were cold from the snow and my eyes hurt from the tears and I felt like I wanted to dive into my bed and never emerge.

As I got into my bed I remembered all the good times Dimitri and I had had. But the first thing I remembered was how the night of Victor's love spell two months ago was when I first lost my virginity to Dimitri.

We were both lying in his bed. Him half naked and me fully naked.

I felt him stroking down my legs and knew there was something I needed to tell him urgently, but I couldn't remember what it was.

I felt as Dimitri pulled his pants off and we were both naked under the sheets of the bed.

I felt Dimitri's hands roam all over my body."Are you sure?" He asked huskily like I had a choice.

"Yes." I whispered as he slowly entered me and the night flew past.

It was only after we started our second round that we got rough and my necklace was ripped of that we both didn't know what we were doing. We looked at our positions and state and knew instantly that we'd had sex. There was nothing left to do now to stop or fix it but it still happened.

As I come to realize this I remembered Lissa. "Lissa." I said automatically to Dimitri and when both flew at lightning speed to save her.

But I never forgot that night. The pure bliss and warmth feeling and then the scariness of Lissa's disappearance

I lied under the covers for what felt like ages before I felt nauseous.

I fled from the bed and into the bathroom and emptied the contents of my stomach into the white porcelain bowl and stayed there until Lissa found me. I was still vomiting.

Once she saw my tear stained face all the questions came out and I answered them only wanting her support.

"What's wrong?" She asked worried.

"Dimitri's leaving." I sobbed out as I got up from the toilet.

"And why are you so upset about that?" She asked not knowing that I had liked Dimitri.

"Because I love him." I explained with those four words.

Lissa looked taken back then she asked one of the questions I had been waiting for. "Have you guys, you know, done it?" She asked slightly blushing.

"Yes." I said, she looked at me questioning. "It was the night you were taken by Victor and we had the lust spell. It just happened because of it."

Then she asked the most obvious question that I was waiting for. "Why didn't you tell me?" She asked really hurt.

"Because I didn't want to tell anyone and let anyone know. I could have been in trouble. He could have been in trouble. And I just didn't want anyone knowing without him telling me if he felt the same way. But he doesn't he's leaving me for Tasha." I said and walked back towards the bed and plopped myself down on it. "And if you're going to ask I don't know why I'm throwing up. I just feel really nauseous."

Lissa just sat at the edge of my bed and looked at me sympathetically. I hated to have people's pity but from Lissa it was worth it. She was the only one who truly cared for me anymore.

Okay... So how was that... Did you like it?

Let me know if I should continue or not? This chapter was just the introduction. I promise the next chapter will be a lot better.

The more reviews I get the quicker I update.

XOXO