A/N: Oh, this idea just came to me 30 seconds ago. Here I am, sending the wonderful Myrah a PM, and BAM! It hits me. I hope you enjoy the insanity.

Warning: Don't read on unless you are a girl, or an incredibly brave boy.

Disclaimer: I do not own Maximum Ride.

Claimer: I own this plot and Fang's power.

Making Connections

(Fang's POV)

Oh, so you've just finished reading our book, right? I thought so, newbie.But here you are, hanging on my few words and squealing with fangirl-ish glee whenever I mention Max and take off my shirt, exposing my incredibly toned stomach and chest.And you're wondering, 'Gee! Why doesn't Fang have a cool power like the rest of them?'

Well, the joke's on you. And the rest of the world for that matter. Because I do have a power. And it's much better than breathing underwater or flying fast.

But I don't think I want to tell you. Yet. I'll make you all suffer.

Because I'm that kind of a guy.

Oh, that won't make you suffer? Then allow me to just..do...this.

I am slowly taking off my shirt. Now, I am dancing. And twirling my shirt around my head.Uh, pelvic thrusts. Smirk.

What's this? Oh no! A bucket of water just poured down on me. I'm shaking my hair, water's flying everywhere.

Isn't it a wonder why I'm still single?

Oh, here goes the belt. What? You want me to stop? Well, if you insist.

So you want to hear about my power now? Well, other than my drop-dead sexiness, I have underwear vision!Oh, you don't think I'm serious?

I am. I'm as serious as I am gorgeous. It's not like X-ray vision. I look at a person, and I see their underwear on the outside of their clothes.

Just like you. Oh yes, the power even works over the internet. No one is immune to my powers! Mwahaha!

Oh, shit! Here comes Max! Quick, act cool!

"Hey, Max." That's it, Fang. Work the charm.

"Fang, why are you wet? And where is your shirt? Dear God, you were stripping for those girls on the internet again, weren't you!" NO! I'm found out!

"No." Don't panic, man! Calm...

Oh, damn my power! Max's red lacy undergarments appeared before my eyes. Don't laugh, Fang. No. That'll only make it worse. Stop! Oh, the torment!

I walked away.Yes, I walk away when it becomes too hard to control my laughter. You would, too!

Actually, I usually just don't talk much. If I open my mouth, I just might burst into fits of uncontrollable laughter.

Oh, don't look at me like that! I bet you're thinking 'Whoa! A teenage boy who walks away from lacy thongs!'

Believe you me, if it was anyone other than Max, I'd be right there, pulling the Fang charm. But it is Max.

What's so funny about Max's thong, you ask?

Just the fact that she hasn't changed it since Iggy made a slingshot out of her last thong a few months ago.

That's right, kids. Max doesn't change her underwear! Quick, go post it on your blog!

So now you're probably thinking: 'Uh-oh! If Fang's uberly awesome power works over the internet, he can probably see my Angelina Ballerina underwear! No!'

Yes, I can. Thank you for finally realizing that.

Oh, don't you just wish you could see my boxers.

Not dissin' my power anymore, now are ya?

Nope. Because it's the best power you can have.

That's why I have it.

Here I am, in the local park, basking in the glow of having a secret power.

Jealous, much?

A/N: Oh, don't even ask where this came from. XD

Don't flame me saying I'm weird. Don't tell me it's OOC. Because I already know those things.

Suggestions are welcome, reviews are love.