Title: Mariposas

Pairings: Harry Potter/OFC, OFC/OMC

Summary: Anna Maria Mariposa is a Butterfly Princess. She is also engaged to Harry Potter. The only problem is that she loves Ralphie. What will she do?

AN: Don't ask. Seriously, don't. I've been kicking this around for a while and finally decided to write it. Yes, I know it's ridiculous. It made me laugh and go "WTF" while I was writing it. So, no lecturing me on how dumb this is, kthnxbai.

…

Read and Review though. And you can tell me how dumb it is; I don't actually care. I'm just not gonna do anything about it.

Disclaimer: Heh, I own nothing except Anna Maria Mariposa, the kingdom of Monarch and Ralphie. Anybody want 'em?

Anna Maria Mariposa was Princess of Butterflies. She had long blond hair that shimmered with rainbow colors in the sunshine. Her large eyes were sky blue and she had thin black antenna coming out of the top of her head. That was normally the only sign that she wasn't completely human. When she wanted, she could transform into a butterfly with rainbow wings.

As Princess of Butterflies, Anna Maria was heir to the throne of Monarch, the most regal and powerful Butterfly kingdom. Unfortunately, this position also made her a bargaining chip for her father, Victor, King of Monarch.

However, being Princess of Monarch meant that Anna Maria was also part witch, since there was a long-standing relationship between Monarch and the wizarding world that involved several marriages. So, Anna Maria got to go to Hogwarts, where she was now in her sixth year.

It was at Hogwarts that she met the boy to whom she was now engaged, Harry Potter. It was also at Hogwarts that she met the boy she loved, Ralphie. Sadly, Ralphie was a nobody. An unknown wizard from an obscure family, her father did not see him as a suitable match. Harry Potter, however, was an excellent match. Anna Maria's father was fond of extolling his virtues:

"Anna Maria, look how he flies! Almost as though he had wings himself!" "He's famous, sweetie! The Boy-Who-Lived! Even the wizards' Ministry admits it now!"

Anna Maria was fond of telling her father she didn't want to marry Harry:

"I don't care how well he flies. It's not like he actually has wings—he has to use a broom!" "I don't WANT famous, Daddy, I want someone who loves me!"

When she started this, their discussions inevitably devolved into shouting matches and left both of them equally mad at each other. More importantly, from Anna Maria's viewpoint at least, it didn't change her father's mind in the least. He was still determined she would marry Harry Potter.

One day, Anna Maria was lamenting this to Ralphie, "He's so mean! I can't believe my own father doesn't want me to happy! Harry and I don't even get along! And, he's got that Weasley girl he's always with; let him marry her."

"Um, Anna Maria, I might have an idea…" Ralphie started.

"What?"

"What if you married a wizard who was also a Butterfly?"

"That might work… But, I don't know anyone like that. And I wanna marry you!" Anna Maria pouted.

"See, I think my plan will fix all that. If I was a Butterfly…"

"How are you gonna become a Butterfly?" Anna Maria interrupted, "I've never heard of a spell for that."

"Well, I won't exactly turn into a Butterfly, but I've been working on becoming an Animagus, and my shape is a butterfly. I'm really close—I even got the wings last night!"

"I didn't know you were working on anything like that—"

"—you've been busy and preoccupied—"

"True enough. I think that would work. I think I remember some ancient, randomly obscure law that says a Princess can marry anyone she likes if they can become a Butterfly… I think they thought it was impossible… And if nothing else, it'll make it easier to run away…"

"Yeah, very true…" Ralphie nodded, then stared at Anna Maria, "What do you mean, run away? As in elope? Your dad would kill me…"

"No, he wouldn't. We Butterflies have strict policies against killing. After all, how will people think we're perfect little fluttery things if it gets out that we kill people? It'd ruin our reputations," Anna Maria paused, looking appropiately righteously indignant, then continued, "Anyway, how much longer do you think you'll need?"

"Two or three days, probably, although I should probably register. I don't have any clue how long that takes…"

Anna Maria nodded, interrupting, "So, today's Thursday, right? So we can tell Father on Sunday—that's the best day for announcing betrothals anyway, so it's perfect."

"But…"

"Hush. You need to go finish your little spell so I can get out of this marriage. See ya later!" Anna Maria walked off, rainbows flashing off her hair, leaving a dumbstruck Ralphie in her wake, wondering what in the world he'd just agreed to.

Sunday

Victor frowned when he saw his daughter walk into Dumbledore's office dragging Ralphie. Harry Potter and the headmaster were already there, ready to finalize plans for Anna Marie and Harry's wedding.

"Anna Maria Mariposa, what do you think you are doing? You know he has no place here," the King of Monarch thundered (well, as much as a Butterfly can, at least).

"Good afternoon, Ms. Mariposa, Mr. Packer," Dumbledore said affably. Harry echoed the headmaster. He didn't look any happier than Anna Maria felt.

"Hello, Professor. Hi, Harry," Mariposa replied, then turned to her father, "I brought Raphie here so we can tell you something. We're going to get married."

"Perhaps. But not to each other. I don't know who Ralphie will marry, but your future husband stands over there," he pointed to Harry, who waved self-consciously.

"No, I'm going to marry Ralphie. He's a Butterfly!"

"That's impossible!" Victor spluttered.

"Show him, Ralphie!" Anna Maria sang.

Ralphie frowned momentarily, then began to glow and shrink. A minute later, a small black and blue Butterfly fluttered where he had stood.

"See?" Anna Maria cried triumphantly, "You cannot stop our love!"

She twirled on the spot and shrank. Victor cried out, but couldn't stop her; a rainbow-winged Butterfly floated next to the other one. The two Butterflies turned to look at each other, then fluttered excitedly out the open window behind Dumbledore's desk.

Dumbledore calmly watched them flutter away, a wistful smile on his aged face. Victor sank to the ground, crying. Harry stared after the Butterflies for a moment, then jumped up, punching the air.

"Yes! I'm free! Wait till Ginny hears this!"

THE END

AN: So, if you've made it this far, you may as well Review, even if all you're gonna do is ask me what in the world I was on when I wrote this. (The answer, btw, is Mountain Dew, not enough sleep and too much schoolwork. Just in case anyone actually was wondering).