Hey guys, I have a new poll on my profile about which story I should update next. If you care enough to put in your two cents, please swing by. Of course, writing little one shots like this instead of updating doesn't really help. But I do hope you enjoy it anyway.

Rules of Engagement

Summary: In which Hiashi attempts to marry off Hinata. And fails miserably in the process. NaruHina, oneshot.

Gaara was not a happy camper.

Not that Gaara was generally a 'happy camper', but really, this was crossing the line.

When he had initially been told of his receipt of a message from Konohagakure, he had thought it would be for a revised trade agreement or perhaps a message from Naruto. He wasn't counting on being pulled into a dated marriage contract with the oldest daughter of Hyuuga Hiashi. So now they – he, his siblings, Matsuri, and Baki – were nearing Konoha, all of them in a very sour mood.

Tsunade was at the main gate to greet them, and, if possible, looked more upset than they.

"You cannot believe how sorry I am that you were dragged into our village politics," said the Hokage through gritted teeth. Gaara knew the anger was not directed at him, but at the Hyuuga head and nodded.

"Hiashi has been an awful pain in the ass since his daughter left his custody fully, trying to find a hole in the legality of it all somewhere so he can marry her off to somebody important. You're about the fifth one in the past few months." She turned around and swept off, the Kazekage keeping pace with her angry stride. "But this is just ridiculous! Did he elaborate at all in his correspondence as to his excuse for this nonsense?"

"No, Tsunade-san. I was merely told that the previous Kazekage had made arrangements between myself and the eldest daughter of Hyuuga Hiashi, and that I should hasten to Konoha to formalize the agreement completely." Nobody missed the cold, irritated edge in Gaara's voice.

"Unfortunately for us, Hinata's on a mission at the moment."

"And why is that unfortunate?" growled Kankurou under his breath. Tsunade shot him a haughty look.

"She may be your new worst enemy, Kankurou-san, but Hinata is an expert at law, clan law especially. She herself is the only reason she hasn't been married off yet. And you don't have to worry about her wanting to marry your brother. Hinata is a very happily committed right now."

"So we'll have to deal with him on our own?" Temari cringed at the very idea. The politics she'd been taught all her life had to do with war and trade, not marriage. Things that she, Kankurou, and Baki knew about pretty manners and courtesans could not fill a teacup. They certainly didn't know how to deal with high and mighty Hiashi.

"Yes."

The remaining walk to the Hokage's office was silent and tense. Matsuri decided against telling Gaara he had a bit of dirt on his face; that might've been the final trigger for his bloody rampage.

Hyuuga Hiashi, in his immense wisdom, had decided to be, as the youngsters said, 'fashionably late'. He arrived at Hokage Tower half an hour after he had received the summons from one of the Hokage's personal chuunin assistants, Izutetsu or something. That meant that he had kept the Hokage as well as four deadly and rather aggravated Suna shinobi waiting. Matsuri was really too nice to be mad at him. Well, until she remembered that he was attempting to marry off Gaara. Then she had no qualms about glaring at the pompous man like the rest of them.

"Kazekage-sama, it is a pleasure to meet you," said Hiashi, bowing slightly.

"I wish I could say the same," Gaara said, choosing to keep his voice level. After all, if he started out with a threatening growl, then if he got any more pissed, he would have nowhere to go but into a screaming fit. And that was just not cool.

Hiashi stiffened but smiled tightly. What an impudent snot! And he didn't even bother to wash his face before their meeting, if the little spot of dirt on his left cheek was any indication. "I see you're not looking at all the benefits that you would receive from a marriage with my eldest."

"I think you should prove the validity of this agreement before you go into any benefits that we may reap," said Temari, sizing up the Hyuuga coldly. They could definitely take him out, but corpses were such an inconvenience to dispose of. Damn. They would have to wait for Hinata – or a miracle – after all.

"In the oldest of all clan agreements… created before the creation of the Godaikoku…blah blah… supersedes almost all other contracts… blah blah blah… blah blah… and, despite current tensions Konoha was feeling with Sunagakure, the Yondaime Kazekage and I drafted a document that ensured the union of Hinata and Gaara." Hiashi drew a neatly-folded sheet of paper out of his kimono and unfurled it proudly, like a flag. It looked very official, Temari thought with some trepidation.

"Give me that," snarled Tsunade, tearing it from Hiashi's grasp. "Is there any way to authenticate this signature or this seal?"

"Baki would be able to," said Gaara dully. Kankurou nudged him sharply in the ribs. "We can't help you if you don't help yourself," whispered his older brother.

"Even if he hadn't known Baki's skills he would've found a way around that. Our best chance of avoiding a migraine right now is to play into his hands for the moment so he develops a false sense of security and wait for Hinata to arrive."

A frowning Baki looked over the seal and signature before nodding. "This is definitely his work," he told them, with an unpleasant emphasis on the 'his' as he handed the paper back to Hiashi with distaste.

Hiashi smiled, triumph shining in his eyes. "Will you submit then?"

"Of course not," Temari snapped at him. "Right Gaara?"

He didn't answer.

"Gaara?"

Perhaps she had misjudged? Perhaps the allure of someone to love was too great? Gaara had spent the majority of his life without someone to care for him, and now it was being handed to him on a silver platter. Perhaps he would –

"I can't believe you had to ask me," he said. The other Suna shinobi smiled in relief. Hiashi scowled.

"Then what will it take to convince you?"

"Well, first off, why don't we wait?" said Tsunade, the epitome of calm.

"Wait? Whatever for?"

"Oh, I don't know, your daughter? The other half of this marriage contract?"

As she suspected, Hiashi tensed and frowned. That's why he was springing this on Gaara now – Hinata was out on a mission. And as long as she was not here to defend herself, marrying her off would be a hell of a lot easier.

As if cued, Shizune poked her head in. "Tsunade-sama, Hinata has arrived from her mission."

"Send her in then."

"Um… she requests an hour's break before meeting with you, Tsunade-sama."

"Request denied. Tell her to get in here."

"…are you sure?"

"Shizune."

"Yes, ma'am…"

There was a moment of hushed talking they could catch from outside the office. And then the door opened.

Hinata walked in. She was wearing an ANBU uniform but her mask was missing; half of a katana, one end a hilt and one end splintered metal, was strapped to her back. She was covered in blood, all over her exposed arms and making her dark blue pants even darker. She was also covered in mud, what smelled like shit and only the gods knew what else. Her hair hadn't been that color before she'd left. Tsunade gaped at her.

"What the hell happened?! I thought this was supposed to be a simple mission!"

"That makes two of us." Hinata's voice was still as quiet as ever, Temari mused, thinking back on their first ever chuunin exams. But it wasn't stuttering. Instead, the silvery softness of her voice was laced with an undertone of cold steel. She was a real shinobi now, and even if they couldn't get out of this mess, Temari was relieved that this woman would not be some incompetent prig of a ninja.

"So I suppose this is why you requested the break?"

"Indeed. Unless other people enjoy the scent of death and manure, I was hoping to bathe."

"Wounds?"

"They didn't break skin, I just have some bad bruises." So all of that blood was that of her enemies. Gaara hated to admit it, but he was impressed. Suddenly her eyes caught sight of Hiashi and the neutral look on her face faded into annoyance.

"You…"

She marched over to his chair, placed one foot on an armrest and with the opposite hand snatched the broken katana from off of her back. He leaned away from the deadly-sharp splinters of steel that teased his throat as she glared at him.

"When are you going to leave me alone?" she hissed, eyes flashing.

"When you stop associating with that boy!"

Hinata sighed and withdrew, placing the sword on her back again and backing up so that she stood in front of the huge desk facing the visitors.

"Never, then. I still want to request a break. Hiashi, leave. Come back in an hour."

He looked shocked at her impudence. "How dare you – Hokage-sama –"

"I couldn't agree more, Hinata-chan. Hiashi, get out. Come back in an hour."

He stood up regally from his seat, tossing his head with all the arrogance of a king. For a good long moment he glared at all of them.

"The door's right over there, in case you've forgotten," Hinata said politely. With one last derisive sniff, he swept out of the office, the ends of his kimono fluttering with every movement. Hinata sighed again.

"Ugh. How long has he been on this new… thing?"

"About a week now."

"Right after I've left for a mission. He's getting smarter." She turned to the Suna shinobi and managed a smile. "If you want to break for lunch, there's a great barbeque place just down the street from Hokage Tower."

"That sounds good," said Temari, the unofficial spokesperson.

"So we'll meet back here in an hour and a half?"

Tsunade frowned. "You told Hiashi an hour."

"And how long did he keep you waiting?"

Temari grinned reluctantly. "Point taken."

"Not only is the 'tit for tat' mentality acceptable in high society, it's totally okay for you to be late for a meeting with him since you're the Kazekage's party. Kage outranks clan leader. Even if he wanted to, speaking out against something like that could smear him politically. Of course, he doesn't think you know that, and will be unpleasantly surprised by your tardiness." Hinata smirked at their stunned faces. Kankurou's grin mirrored his sister's.

"You really do know your stuff!"

Gaara, Baki, Kankurou, Temari and Matsuri were just finishing their leisurely lunch at Yakiniku Q when Hinata strolled through the door, greeting a familiar waiter with a smile. She looked infinitely more ready to face her father now. All the blood and other unidentified materials had been washed away, leaving her pale complexion for the world to see. Long, dark hair, unbound from its previous bun, shimmered a bit in the light as she walked over to their table and a casual red dress accentuated her body in all the right places. She was transformed. More than one head turned as she made her way over.

Gaara had to admit to himself that if he ended up married to Hinata, he wouldn't be miserable. Not with a body like that! He heard Kankurou whistle lowly next to him, and knew he felt much the same. Hinata finally reached their table and Kankurou looked up at her with a hopeless grin. Gaara rolled his eyes – he knew that grin. He knew that there was a well-rehearsed pick up line lurking behind it. Maybe, was it love at first sight or do you want to walk by again? Or perhaps – he repressed a snort as he thought of the last time his brother had used this one – I hope you know CPR, cause baby you take my breath away!

Much to Kankurou's dismay, she looked right past him and straight at Gaara.

"Did you have a pleasant lunch, Kazekage-sama?" Hinata asked him, smiling.

"Yes, thank you very much Hinata-san. Your help in this matter has been most advantageous for both parties involved. Without you…" Gaara trailed off grimly. Hinata was pleasantly surprised by his little speech; she had been led to believe that Gaara was cold and withdrawn, despite his obvious changes since their first chuunin exam. Though, it may have been the fact that she had seen him slaughter three Rain-nin in cold blood that stopped her from looking into the situation.

"I'm confident we can avoid any unnecessary marital entanglements. For several reasons," she said with a secret smile, fingering her silver necklace. Temari thought it rather peculiar that the end of the chain was hidden down the front of her dress, but soon let it go to focus on more important things.

"If you're not ready to depart, I would be happy to wait outside."

"No, we were just about to pay and leave." Baki flagged down their waiter and handed him exact change, plus a tip. The man bowed in return.

"Thank you, Kazekazge-sama and company, for dining at our modest barbeque restaurant," he said formally. He politely avoided looking at the dirt on the Kazekage's face. Gaara nodded in return.

"Hinata-san, should we expect you and others at the regular time this week?" said the waiter, turning now to Hinata.

"Probably… though I don't know when Kiba-kun will get back from his mission. Yes, I suppose."

Matsuri turned to her as they left the restaurant, gathering up her courage. It was difficult to speak to such a self-assured and competent woman. The only reason she didn't have this same trouble with Temari was because she'd known Temari for most of her life.

"Do you… go there often?"

"Hm? Oh yes. You see, Shikamaru's team and my team try to meet there once a week."

Temari perked up as she heard Shikamaru's name. "Are you guys close?" She tried to keep her voice casual.

"Yes, our teams are quite close. Our sensei and their sensei were romantically involved you see, and ever since Asuma-san died, we've tried very hard to keep in touch with them."

"Oh god, I'm sorry –"

Hinata waved a hand to cut her off. "It's nothing. Asuma-san died about five years ago. I still wouldn't recommend mentioning it around Chouji-kun, Ino-chan, or Shikamaru-kun, though. It's a hard loss…"

"Of course."

There were several moments of silence.

"So… the Hokage told us you were already 'happily committed'," Kankurou said to break the quiet, and Gaara had to roll his eyes. A rosy pink blush appeared on Hinata's pale cheeks.

"Ah, yes," she said, stumbling a bit. She missed Kankurou's wounded look. "And we're here already!"

Shizune let them in with a nervous look on her face. As suspected, Hiashi had arrived at Tsunade's office at the proper time. Judging by the look on the Hokage's face, it hadn't been a pleasurable half hour.

"I trust we are all ready to continue with the talks?" Hiashi said silkily, trying to cover up his annoyance. He would've succeeded, but Hinata knew just about every sign – the strained muscle in his right hand, the tightening of the more-prominent-than-ever wrinkles next to his eyes. She suppressed a smirk.

"Quite," She replied, the epitome of demure. "Could you please explain the reasoning for this partnership to me?"

"Based on the clause set down by the man who would become Shodai Kazekage and our very own Shodai Hokage, any two children of any powerful politicians within the Godaikoku can be wed by the eldest's twentieth year in order to cement peace in times of non-combat. Peace is like a fire – it needs to be nurtured, and a political marriage is an excellent way to help it along. The Yondaime Kazekage and I wrote up a contract that was in accordance with this clause."

Hiashi did not mention that both of them expected their respective child to die before they could be wed. He thought that might've been damaging to the negotiations process.

"That can't be the end," said Hinata at once. "What are the conditions for termination of the contract?"

"There are three way to terminate this contract. One – both politicians give mutual consent to dispense with the contract."

"If that's true then why are we even here?" Temari demanded, crossing her arms over her chest angrily. "The Yondaime is dead! There's no way we can verify if he wanted this to go through now!"

"Ahh, but Hiashi can argue that since he did not dispute the terms of the contract before death that the decision stands," said Hinata with a frown. "The two other ways?"

"A large donation – Hinata's dowry – was given to the Kazekage at the time the contract was drafted. If you returned the money to the Hyuuga clan, I would have no objections to the contract's termination," said Hiashi, smirking slightly. Gaara glared. Suna was still a poor nation, recovering from the reign of the previous Kazekage. The ridiculous amount of money he was sure Hiashi had dished out was lost forever – housing for orphans, irrigation for limited crops, replaced medical equipment. They could not afford to return the sum to the Hyuuga.

"And the third way?" Hinata's voice was still calm.

"One of the two children involved must be committed – as in engaged to be married or married - by the time this contract comes into play," said Hiashi, smirk widening. "And if that is all, I will begin making plans for the upcoming nuptials." He leaned back in his seat, looking supremely satisfied with himself.

"But father," said Hinata sweetly, "It seems as though you're overlooking an important detail. I'm already committed."

"Committed as in engaged, my dear." Hiashi's voice was equally kind. "'Dating' is not a sufficient enough stage to be considered committed."

"Oh, didn't I tell you? He proposed a month ago," said Hinata, pulling the chain out from under her neckline to reveal a simple silver ring with a small spiral carved onto it. Hiashi's eyes bugged out – his hand, lightning-fast, attempted to snatch the chain from around her neck but Hinata was faster.

"Absolutely not!" he roared, standing up. "NO! I forbid it!"

"There is nothing you can do about it," Hinata said calmly. "We are getting married, and we going to stay married, and you are going to have to deal with it!"

"NO!"

Hinata stood, eyes widening slightly, as he lunged at her, looking for all intents and purposes like a man possessed. Four ANBU appeared out of nowhere to restrain him. He struggled fruitlessly for a few seconds before tearing out of their hold and marching toward the door.

"This isn't over!" he yelled, slamming the door behind him.

Hinata took several deep breaths, trying to calm her racing heart. "It's been over for a while," she muttered to no one. "You just have to accept it."

"He proposed?!"

Hinata looked at Tsunade with a large smile and a trademark blush. "Yes."

Tsunade grinned almost insanely before pulling the startled kunoichi into a hug.

"Eep!"

"Congratulations!"

"Umm… thank you…" Hinata choked out, uncomfortably aware of the Hokage's impressive bust against her cheek. She repressed a relieved sigh when she was released. "Please don't tell anyone… we've been trying to keep it low-key…"

"You mean you've been trying to keep it low key," Tsunade replied with a grin.

"I managed to convince him… we have too many enemies – him especially. We'll see how long it lasts…" She didn't sound hopeful.

"He's due back from his mission this afternoon," said Tsunade, still grinning. "Why don't you show the Kazekage around Konoha in the meantime?"

"…so the spot where Nidaime-sama sold dango for his first D-rank mission eventually became the most critically acclaimed dango and tea shop in the country," Hinata said, pointing to a large, rather ornate looking café. It was crowded with villagers and ninja of all ages. "It remains a very popular establishment."

"This is way more informative than anything that lazy bastard ever told me," Temari said brightly. She had seen Konoha in a new light today. Hinata rolled her eyes.

"Shikamaru-kun is a good ninja, but he isn't exactly a tourism poster boy." Her knowing look melted into a kind smile as she surveyed the Suna party. "I think you've seen all of the important things. Were you planning to leave for Sungakure tonight or to stay?"

Temari looked at her brother curiously. "Gaara?"

"We should stay!" said Kankurou before Gaara could say anything. "We've never really gotten to enjoy Konoha before now – it's a perfect opportunity!"

"We still have to resolve the conflict between the Ieyasu and the Tokugawa clans back home," said Baki, shooting a stern look at Kankurou who rolled his eyes. "It wouldn't be prudent to stay an unnecessary night."

"What do you think, Matsuri?" said Gaara calmly, seemingly ignoring the other two. A pretty blush lit up the small brunette's face and she smiled. He'd seen fit to ask her for advice in his decision! Matsuri was in heaven.

"U-um… I trust your judgment, Gaara-sama."

"We're leaving," he said after a moment of silence. Kankurou scowled petulantly; Baki smiled in approval.

"I'll escort you to the Main Gate then," Hinata said. "It's only a couple minute's walk from here –"

"HINATA!"

Of all the smiles the Sunagakure ninja had seen that day, the one Hinata now donned was the brightest, the sweetest, and the most sincere. Forgetting her role as a hostess for the moment, she took off in the direction of the shout, throwing herself into the arms of a familiar blonde man. They proceeded to engage in a kiss that would be considered well beyond the bounds of appropriate PDA by most people. Uncaring, the couple's lip lock continued until the blonde's dark-haired companion scowled and spoke up.

"Get a room already…"

"Ah, shut up you bastard," Naruto growled without venom, his eyes never leaving Hinata's flushed face.

"I missed you," she said breathlessly.

"I thought you weren't supposed to be back for another week!"

"I got back early, the mission was a bust," she said, shrugging. He leaned down and whispered in her ear. Hinata giggled. They were in their own world.

"In case you didn't notice, the Kazekage is still here, Hyuuga," Sasuke drawled, knowing that embarrassing Hinata was the quickest way to get her to stop. Predictably, she pulled away from Naruto and turned to face a highly amused group of Sand ninja with an even redder blush.

"Um, s-sorry!" she squeaked out, attempting to disappear behind Naruto. He didn't let her, instead wrapping an arm around her waist and grinning madly.

"Gaara! What's up? What brings you to Konoha?" Naruto crowed, totally disregarding all and any politeness that should have been used when addressing a leader of a powerful ninja village. The other man only smiled.

"An unfortunate run-in with a certain Hyuuga…"

"Whaa? Hinata wasn't giving you trouble, was she?"

"Daddy tried to marry me off to Gaara while you were gone," Hinata explained. Naruto glowered, eyes flashing red briefly.

"Again?" He hissed under his breath.

"Please don't get upset–"

"How can I not get upset by this? Your father keeps trying to get you engaged to every man but me!" He maneuvered their bodies so that they were facing each other and cupped her face in his hands. "I'm sick of hiding it in the shadows, Hina!"

"But –"

"HEY! EVERYBODY!" Naruto's booming voice had the attention of everyone within a thirty foot radius. Hinata was close to hyperventilating.

"Omigod –"

"I'M GONNA MARRY THIS WOMAN!"

The crowd erupted into cheers as their Hokage-to-be picked up his fiancée and swung her around before depositing her back on the ground, dipping her like a seasoned tango danger, and kissing the daylights out of her.

It was a testament to her maturity that Hinata did not faint. Her face, however, seemed to have invented a new shade of red. Naruto gently removed the silver chain from her neck and slid the ring off. He secured it on her ring finger and then smiled at her.

"No more hiding," he said firmly.

"No more hiding," she agreed, rolling her eyes. The effect, of course, was lessened by her blush.

"Congratulations," said Gaara, with a hint of emotion. For him, it was saying something and Naruto understood that.

"Thanks!" Naruto was grinning. "By the way, did you know you have dirt on your face?"

END

I know, I know… not that much NaruHina. And the ending was lame. But the NH moments near the end were nice, right? RIGHT!? And I don't know what's up with the GaaMatsu…just kinda snuck up on me. :D