1. The first time he went there alone, without his mom, he was 16. Finn didn't know where to go, he'd stormed out of Glee Club heartbroken, angry, confused, and not thinking. As he drove aimlessly in tears he thought about where to go, and knew home was out of the question. He couldn't face telling his mom the truth, it hurt too much. So he went to the second place he thought of and when he arrived, he just broke down into more tears. After passing through the gate, he parked his car and sat cross-legged on the soft grass below him as the tears fell down his cheeks. Once the long minutes of sobs slowed down, Finn began to speak,
"Hey Dad, I know it's been a while since mom and I have been here and I'm really sorry about that. But today I'm here alone, and I know you must feel like a total loser seeing your son sob like a little girl, and I'm sure if anyone from the school right now saw me they'd laugh in my face. I feel like I've let you down Dad. I'm sorry you got an idiot as a son, who's not a hero like you, who's naive and believes what any girl tells him, and cries like a baby in the middle of a cemetery. I'm so sorry."
That's when tough Finn Hudson broke down once again. He hugged his core and rocked back and forth on the ground letting his salty tears soak up his t-shirt. Seconds turned into minutes, before Finn had composed himself enough to speak again, "You want to know why I'm crying Dad. It's cause your son's stupid, and doesn't know the basic things of sex Ed. Who thinks he can actually get a girl pregnant from swimming sperm in a hot tub. Who, even though in the back of his mind knew it couldn't be true, believed it, because the truth was too hard to bear. Quinn lied to me dad. She told me I got her pregnant and then was going to let me go through our whole lives thinking it was my kid. I don't understand how someone could do that. And Puck, Dad remember Puck the baby boy down the street mom used to tell you about having play dates with before you died and was my best friend until now? It's his baby not mine. That girl had the decency to sleep with my best friend and then say the kids mine. " Facing the truth just made it even harder for him; he didn't get how someone could do that to him. Why he was the chosen one to get all this hurt put on him? He could literally hear his heart breaking in two the more he thought about the reality of his life.
"And dad the only reason I know this is not because of Quinn or Puck. Nope they went along with it; it's all because of Rachel Berry. She's the only person in the world who actually cares about my life. The whole Glee Club knew about this, and never told us, they just were going to go along with it because they didn't think about how this would affect me and just how it'd effect them. Dad I thought there were good people in the world but I'm not sure anymore. The only one I know is Rachel. Gosh I'm a pathetic loser, again I'm sorry Dad, so sorry." He sat there just crying there for hours, eventually drifting off to sleep until his Mom found him there and he had to tell her the truth. She knew it was times like these when he really needed a father.
2. Finn pounded the steering wheel in frustration as he drove, and shouted swear words to no one in particular as he arrived at his destination. He paced back and forth angrily stomping before finally sitting down frowning and beginning to talk, "I'm such a screw up. Why is popularity so important to me? Why do I think my image is better than serious relationships and hurting people you care about? Dad I really messed up this time, and I don't know if I will ever get the chance to fix it. It's all because of Rachel Berry, that girl I told you about the only person in the world who actually cared about me. I broke her heart and now I think she's breaking mine."
"Ahhh!" Finn shouted in frustration and the maintenance crew, and grieving families all looked at him like he was crazy, but he didn't care.
"I had Rachel Dad, we were dating and it was good. I mean I liked her, but I was still upset about the Quinn thing. Then out of temptation, I broke up with her, thinking she was bad for my image, and she was just too much work. Then I realized she was the only thing that I really need but it was too late Dad. She found someone, and at first lied to me about it but still she's with someone else. To make it worse I made a reckless decision that I regret deeply now, and I know it's gonna hurt Rachel in the future. Now her boyfriend's at our school and he's like the perfect guy for her. I want Rachel back Dad but now I don't think I ever will get another chance." With that, he sat like last time, there for hours in frustration letting his thoughts run wild, and he knew this was another moment where he needed his Dad to show him right or wrong.
3. He happily placed flowers down on the grave, along with an American flag this time around, and smiled grinning ear to ear when he sat down on the almost summer grass. The wind blew around him and he soaked up Ohio's, May, sun.
"I bet your wondering why I'm here this time Dad, and why I'm so happy. Well clearly, my life is doing pretty well, and I am here once again because of Rachel Berry. I'm in love with Rachel, and she knows it. I know I disappointed you at regionals because we lost, but we got another year. Plus I got something better out of our loss, like the best girlfriend ever. Before regionals she was still sad about that jackass Jesse and I was trying to cheer her up on the stairs, telling her we could win and she kissed me, and it was like the best kiss ever. Then right before we sang I, told her I loved her and even though we lost, we were still awesome. This summers gonna be epic cause were together, so I just thought I'd tell you that Dad. That I'm not a total screw up and you can be proud of your son for one thing." Finn just sat there smiling in contentment looking up at the clouds peacefully. He always tried to be good for his dad, and show him that he could be a man even without him and Finn finally felt like he was going that.
4. The car slammed to a halt and he marched up the path angry and crying. He didn't know when his life could get this messed up. The snow crunched below him and Finn didn't even bother to worry about how freezing he'd be or how wet his butt would get when he sat down. He wanted to punch something, or kick a chair, but from experiences, he knew that didn't make the pain subside. So he just sat breathing heavily, and choking back angry tears.
"I've lost all hope for good people Dad. Of course I know that mom is a good person, but of course she is she's my mom. Burt's pretty good too, I mean I know he can't replace you but he helps fill in the voids in situations where I really need a father figure. Except right now I just really need to talk to you Dad. And like I said I've lost any thoughts that people can really care about me." Finn sat; punching the ground, then made snowballs and threw them at no one in particular. His pants were seriously soaking and he knew he was probably gonna get a cold after this, and he'd hear a fit from his mom about not wearing a coat, and Kurt would yell at him for ruining his jeans. However, currently he could care less.
"Am I not good enough for any girl dad? I guess not cause every girl I date has to cheat on me. Maybe because I'm just an idiot who isn't hot, or doesn't listen well. Do I really deserve that much hurt, I mean what have I done to the universe to deserve every girl I love to cheat on me with Puck. That's right Rachel, the one I said that cared about me more than anyone in this world, besides mom. She kissed Puck while we were dating, just because I did bad things with Santana when we weren't even dating. She knew how much it would hurt me after Quinn and she did it anyway. Who can I trust in this world if Rachel Berry cheats on me? No one dad, and I'm once again sorry your son can't even make Rachel like me enough to not cheat on me." This time he didn't sit for hours in sadness or happiness, he just got up and left. Because he knew people always said his dad was watching over him, but with all these awful things happening to him, he was losing faith.
5. Mediocrity is kind of a funny feeling, and that's exactly how Finn felt when he showed up. Not happy, but he had no anger or sadness in him either. He knew he should be feeling something right now, but he did not.
"I honestly don't know why I'm here Dad, it kind of just felt like the right place to go. We just won regionals Dad and it was pretty awesome since we wrote original songs. I was sad that Kurt wasn't with us and he lost but we still did really good, and Rachel performed this amazing solo. The thing is Dad I know I should be feeling like super happy right now and I am, but then there's this feeling that's pulling down my happiness. Plus I have like a super hot popular girlfriend now, so my life is doing pretty well, but I don't really feel anything. Does that mean there's something wrong with me? I should be going crazy now and I'm not, I just feel normal. This is one of those times where I really need you dad." With a deadpan face and no emotions, Finn just sat staring off into space thinking. He knew his Dad was watching him now, but he didn't understand what he was trying to do for him, giving him a life with no emotions.
6. He sat there quietly not saying a word as he drove to the familiar destination, while she sat staring at him then drifting off to sleep wondering where he was exactly driving her. Once they arrived he shook her shoulder and she shot awake, and lazily looked around the car puzzled. He just smiled and took her hand and said, "There's someone I'd like you to meet Rachel." She didn't ask any questions as he opened the door for her and then walked hand and hand to same place he'd been to so many times. She just looked at Finn waiting for him to say something; while he basked in the silence, realizing that for once in her life Rachel Berry wasn't talking. So he smiled down to her and she smiled back, wondering how he could be happy here. Then he proceeded to do like he always does and sat crisscross on the grass and patted the ground next to him, signaling for her to sit. She smoothed her skirt out and sat down on her knees right next to him.
"Rachel Barbara Berry, meet my Dad. Dad, meet Rachel Berry."
Rachel smiled and waved a small wave, "Hi Mr. Hudson it's very nice to finally meet you." She said, then stuck her hand out pretending to shake someone's hand in the air. A smirk appeared on Finn's face as he took in the sight.
"Yeah Dad this is the same Rachel Berry I've been talking about since I was 16. The only one to tell me the truth and the one whose heart I broke, then the one who broke my heart, and made me feel nothing when I should have been happy. The one who I cost Nationals for, the one who cares about me more than anyone in the world. That Rachel Berry is here to finally meet you." Rachel just sat in awe as she watched Finn talk with such ease and happiness and she couldn't help but feel tears stinging the backs of her eyes. Finn looked over at her, grabbed her hand, and nodded for her to start talking so she did,
"Well hello Mr. Hudson, I'm sorry for breaking your son's heart and I hope you don't hate me too much for it. I would just like to say that you have a very talented boy on your hands and I'm sure if you were here you'd be very proud of him. I do not know if you've ever heard him sing but he's fantastic, and he cares about everyone in his life a lot. Also, your son doesn't know it but he has the potential to do anything he wants and dream huge if he tried. I know he can do anything and your son is growing to be a very honorable man."
It was Finn's turn to look like he was going to cry now, as he saw his girlfriend fall into the crazy thing he'd done all these years, and talked to his Dad like it was totally normal. He couldn't help but smile as he watched her talk enthusiastically about something that happened the other day, just like she was talking to Finn or her dads. She looked up at him and giggled, knowing he was staring at her but he didn't care that she knew. The couple sat like that holding a conversation for a while, like they were sitting and talking to Christopher at the dinner table. When they were done Finn grabbed Rachel's hand as they walked back to his car and he looked at her. At that moment, he did not believe he could love her anymore than he did.
7. Rain pounded on his windshield as the wipers moved as fast as they could trying to fight the droplets pelting down on the glass in the night storm. Still Finn drove through the gates and parked in the familiar spot, and he went out into the storm not even worrying about an umbrella because he was so sad and lost in thought. As his flashlight searched through the rain and darkness, he found where he was going only to see a tiny ball curled up next to the grave. She looked up at him with red rimmed, puffy eyes that seemed to match his perfectly and they both stared at each other in silence. Then just like that, they both had the same thought and went running to into each other's arms, and he rocked her back in forth rubbing her back while her hands got tangled in his hair and the feeling of him in her arms. Finn placed her down on the ground with him cradling her, and they sat like that in the silence for a long time. Then Finn talked to the only person he could address right now, the other being too painful.
"I bet your wondering what were both doing here aren't you Dad?" But before he could finish his explanation she stopped him,
"I already talked to him Finn. I'm sorry I'm here but after sitting crying in my bed for the longest time, I didn't know who to talk to, so I came here. It felt like the right thing to do, but I'll leave if you want to talk alone, I just needed comfort and it helped" She started to get up but Finn tightened his grip on her and she slumped back into his chest realizing she could not fight his strength. He just looked at her stroking her hair and she noticed some tears trickling down his face, so she wiped them with her finger. Then he pulled her face in her hands and kissed her with all the emotions he had been holding back. She returned his kiss with just as much passion and when they pulled back, they just gazed into each other's eyes.
"I love you Rachel."
"Finn don't. I love you too but don't."
"No Rachel. God damn it why are you so stubborn? Can't you see what were like when we're apart. We don't function, and we're so tethered that we somehow ended up at the same place in our depression. We are not just some high school romance like you want us to be. We're more than that and I'm not gonna let what some people search their whole lives looking for go to waste. Don't you see how lucky we are Rach? We found our soul mates so young, I know you don't want to hear it but that's what we are. So I refuse to let you think these feelings will go away when and you will forget about me when you leave for New York. I know that I will always love you Rachel Berry, no matter how far away from each other we're always there. It's not a choice between love and Broadway, you can have both Rachel! What do you want Rach, what does your heart really want?"
The tears were pouring down both their faces, when he finished his heart pounded out of loss, sadness, hope, anger, and love. After what felt like an eternity, Rachel kissed him, with more passion then their last kiss and their tongues danced with each other in their mouths with so much fire. Their eyes locked after and Rachel whispered in a barely audible tone, "Double or nothing. Both Finn, I want both. I love you." With that he smiled, then scooped her up in his arms, and began to walk back to his car but before they left he whispered back, "Thanks Dad"
8. The sun shined bright this morning with only few clouds as the couple strolled hand and hand to their spot. Once the destination was reached they turned to each other and Finn questioned, "Hmm who do you think should tell him Rach?"
"Well I just don't know Finn. I think maybe his son should do the honors."
A giant smile appeared across the man's face and with her permission; he picked up her left hand and shoved it towards the tombstone smiling. "Dad I don't know I got to be the luckiest man in the world but I am, because I'm marrying Rachel Barbara Berry!" The happy couple just stood there, gripping each other's hands and giddily smiling at each other.
"I'm sorry it's been a while since we've been here Dad but we've been so busy in New York and the move into our new apartment was very stressful but we finally got back to telling you."
"Yes Mr. Hudson I'm sorry it took so long. But we'd also like to give you this," then Rachel placed the open envelope on the grave which read, 'You're cordially invited to celebrate the wedding of Finn Christopher Hudson to Rachel Barbara Berry on October 20th, 2018'
"We'd really enjoy it if you came Mr. Hudson and we will be leaving a seat for you at the wedding party table." The happy couple smiled and stood in comfortable silence just soaking up the memory, before leaving to visit old family and friends.
9. He started with, "Dad once again there's someone I'd like you to meet. Say hello to your beautiful grandson Christopher Finnegan Hudson. Born November 12th, 2019 at a healthy 8 lbs. 12 oz. I don't know how my tiny wife carried that around. But look at him dad, isn't he beautiful."
"And look grandpa, he's got your and Finn's smile, and thankfully your noses too."
"Yeah but he got your gorgeous brown eyes, and I hope he gets your brain. I know he got your powerful lungs because they're what keep us up all night these days."
The couple sat their bickering playfully at one another, fighting over which characteristics their son got. As Rachel strolled off to the car placing their son in the car seat, Finn just stood taking in the beautiful image before him. "Thanks Dad for watching over me, and giving me the two greatest gifts in the world. I love you." Smiling he walked over to the car and gave his wife a big kiss.
10. They trudged up the icy path together, with Finn holding a protective hand around her making sure she didn't fall. Rachel knew he was being overprotective, but he did it out of love so she didn't stop him. They stopped at the same spot out of memory and Finn placed the present on the grave and began speaking, "Merry Christmas Dad. I know Rachel and Christopher don't celebrate it, but you did, and mom does. Despite me telling Rach that I know our kids and her are Jewish so we don't have to do stuff, she still insists on giving me a little Christmas every year and now she wanted to give you some. Although, as you can see she already is giving me two beautiful presents very soon." Finn added as he looked over at his very pregnant wife holding their 3 year old son in her hands.
"Mommy why is Daddy talking to no one? When I do that you two look at me like I'm silly." The couple just laughed at their child seeing how much he truly is like his father.
"Sweetheart you're dad is talking to your Grandpa." Chris looked around searching for someone that he knew but saw no one and Rachel realized she needed to explain more, "No sweetie not Papa Burt, or Grandpa Hiram or Granddaddy Leroy. You see honey have you ever wondered why your named Christopher?"
The kid nodded enthusiastically and she smiled down at him with her husband urging her to keep going, "Well darling, like I have explained to you before, everybody has two real parents, a mother and a father, but you can have many mommies or daddies in your life. Like how my parents are Shelby and one of your grandpas, but I really have two daddies. Well your Daddies parents are Grandma Carole and someone you've never met named Grandpa Christopher. He's the guy you're named after. Grandpa Christopher was a soldier, like the ones you see on TV who wear all the camouflage. He died when Daddy was just a little baby and that's why you've never met him. But he's here all the time, so Daddy and I have been coming here since we were very young to talk to him because he should be just as much a part of our lives as any other of your grandparents." Chris seemed to ponder this and Rachel and Finn anticipated seeing if Rachel's explanation made sense to him. Luckily, he seemed to understand what his mother had said then walked forward from his mom to stand right in front of the grave and said,
"Hi Grandpa Christopher. It's very nice to meet you, I'm your grandson and I have the same name as you. I'm 3 and I want to be just like Daddy when I grow up and play football and fight fires and sing loud and find my love just like mommy." The parents laughed at their son and Finn wrapped his arms around his wives large belly and whispered, "We've done good Rach"
11. The day was dark and cloudy as the family walked up the path that they had walked so many times. This time they stopped a little further though and Finn ordered everyone to sit down. The silence fell in between everyone and his wife and his faces were covered in tears, as the wounds were still fresh after a year. The sobs filled the silence for a while until Finn spoke up, "Chris, Caroline, Barbara say hi to grandma and grandpa for me."