Hello, readers! :D Yes, I am still alive! xD For those of you who are following my story It Began and Ended With You, I'm sorry I haven't updated it in a loooong time… I got stuck on chapter 12, and when I moved onto other things, I kinda forgot about it. Maybe I'll continue it eventually, but for now, it's on hold. In the meantime, I started playing Dragon Age 2 again recently, and I fell in love with Fenris all over again. So, without further ado, here is a little Hawke/Fenris fanfic that I started writing last night. Right now, I'm thinking it'll be two chapters long… maybe three. But for now, here is the first chapter! Please read and review. ^_^
WARNING: THERE IS VERY BRIEF DANARIUS/FENRIS AT THE BEGINNING OF THIS FANFIC! Danarius kind of implied such a thing when he asked Hawke in-game "He's rather skilled isn't he?" during the Alone quest in Act 3, so I figured I'd take it up a notch and make Fenris's time with the bastard that much more pity-worthy. I apologize if you end up mentally scarred by the end of this chapter. ^_^;;
The room was poorly lit by candles that flickered along the stone walls. It was a well-furnished room, complete with a luxurious bed covered in brightly-colored Orlesian fabrics. The bureau and bookcases lining the edges of the room were carved of solid mahogany, polished so completely that the flames flickered in their surfaces like mirrors. Of course, the wood was polished to perfection: it had been he whom Danarius charged with the task.
The elf paused in his chores when he heard the door open, glancing over at his master just as he sauntered into the room. He instinctively bowed his head in submission to the powerful magister, fearful as any slave about being punished for disobedience. Danarius scrutinized his sleeping quarters with a grin before leering at his slave.
"I am impressed, Fenris. You completed this task quicker than I expected you would," he praised, taking a seat on the edge of his bed. "Now, then… there is another service I would like you to perform for me, my little wolf."
Fenris tensed slightly but made no protest, setting the polishing rag aside and getting to his feet. He knew what Danarius wanted. He had been made to perform such services numerous times before. When he was close enough, Danarius grabbed his wrist and yanked him down, crashing their lips together in a bruising kiss that was only a precursor to worse things to come…
Fenris woke from the nightmare—nay, the memory—with a yell and his markings flared to life, his body automatically entering a state of self-defense. His eyes were wide and blazing with fury as he looked quickly about the room, attempting to identify a threat as his breaths came out in shallow, near-panicked bursts. There was, however, none to be found. Gradually, he began to relax, the ethereal glow of his markings fading and plunging him into near-darkness. He sighed and swung his legs over the edge of the bed, hunching over and running his fingers through snow-white hair. There was no way he would be able to return to sleep now, he decided. He did not want to risk suffering that nightmarish memory again in the same night.
Suddenly, Fenris was snapped out of his reverie by the sound of something shattering downstairs. He got up and grabbed his sword from its resting place against the wall, holding it firmly with both hands. He didn't have time to put the outer layer of armor back on, so he left the room wearing only his leggings and tunic and hoped there weren't more burglars than he could handle on his own. Then again, if they were burglars, why should he care if they stole anything? Almost everything in the mansion belonged to Danarius, so Fenris had no need for most of it.
So, bearing that in mind, he wouldn't kill them if they were burglars. If they were some of Danarius's hunters, though, they would get no mercy from him. He crept downstairs and followed the noises to their source, but when he saw where they were coming from, his eyes widened with surprise. "Hawke?"
The young woman looked up from where she was kneeling on the floor and smiled sheepishly, revealing that she was picking up shards of a vase she had accidentally knocked over. So, that was what I heard, Fenris thought.
"Hey, Fenris. Sorry for breaking it, I… I didn't see it," she apologized. "I'll clean it up."
"No need," Fenris sighed, setting his sword aside now that he no longer needed to use it. "I have purposely broken much more valuable things in this mansion than that vase, so it is no great loss. Just leave it where it is; I'll sweep the pieces aside later." Fenris crossed his arms and looked at Hawke questioningly, frowning. "Why are you here?"
Hawke stood up and started playing with a lock of her chestnut hair: a nervous tick she had had since childhood. The look in her hazel eyes was one of uncertainty, as though she really didn't know why she was there. When she finally spoke, her voice was barely louder than a whisper, and it held a distinct tone of sadness within it.
"I… I couldn't sleep…"
"You couldn't… sleep?" Fenris spoke slowly as though tasting the words on his tongue, raising an inquiring eyebrow at the beautiful young woman standing before him. It just seemed really strange to him. Hawke had never come to him for that reason before, so he was curious to hear more.
Hawke's eyes shimmered and she took a few steps closer to the elf, inhaling shakily as she attempted to clarify for him. She could tell that Fenris was puzzled, but telling him the truth behind her presence at his home that night was difficult for her. It was difficult because she knew she would start crying if she said exactly what she was thinking. Perhaps that was the price she had to pay, however.
"I had a dream about Mother last night, and tonight… I-I just can't sleep in that estate… Even with Orana, Bodahn, Sandal, and Bruno there, it feels empty without Mother…" Hawke's eyes welled up with tears and the droplets soon overflowed and trickled down her cheeks, the hazel depths looking into Fenris's moss-green ones with a silent plea that was so desperate, it made the elf's heart ache.
Fenris's expression softened and he hesitated a moment before closing the distance between them and pulling Hawke into a gentle hug, uncertainly rubbing her back in an attempt to comfort her. "I see…" He trailed off and was silent for a few minutes, unsure of what else he could possibly say to her. He felt her trembling slightly in his arms, and it absolutely broke his heart to see her this way. It had been three years since the death of Leandra at the hands of that evil bastard Quentin, but it was perfectly clear to him that her death was still fresh in Hawke's mind. Even after several years had passed, it was still an open wound, and Hawke was so vulnerable… Finally, he spoke, and his voice was surprisingly soft as he did so.
"I understand that it's painful to sleep in your own home right now, but you need rest… If you must, you can spend the night here. I don't mind, as long as you don't mind the mess…"
Hawke's eyes lit up and she smiled up at him, her tear-filled eyes sparkling not only with tears, but with gratitude. She wrapped her arms around Fenris's slim waist and hugged him tightly, sniffling. "Thank you, Fenris. I… I know there are a lot of times where you don't agree with what I am, or what I'm doing, but… even then, you always hear me out when I have something to say. I really appreciate it…"
Fenris's brow furrowed slightly with anguish when he felt the young woman wrap her arms around his waist, his muscles tensing up a bit. His markings tingled at Hawke's touch, and he couldn't say for sure whether that was a good thing or not. When the markings had been given to him in that Maker-forsaken ritual, the agony he had experienced had been beyond anything he had ever felt, and had been severe enough to erase everything in his mind about his life before that pain. The memory of that pain still lingered not only in his mind, but in his flesh… so whenever Hawke touched him, his markings tingled and burned as though touched by a current of electricity. During that night of passion he and Hawke had spent together three years ago, his markings had tingled like crazy… but that hadn't been the reason for his walking out afterward.
"You don't need to thank me… Now, come on. I'll try to clean up the guest bedroom for you."
"T-there's no need for that. I… I don't want to be alone, Fenris. N-not tonight."
"What do you mean…?"
"Let me sleep with you tonight."
A/N: Again, I apologize if the image brought on by the end of Fenris's nightmare scarred anyone. xD I just figured such a thing happening to him in the past would make it even easier to feel bad for him. ^_^;; Please read and review, and I'll see you next chapter!