Half-Wit's SS Nuzlocke Adventure
Chapter 1: The Saga Begins…
Rules: Any Pokémon that faints is dead and must be released or boxed permanently. You can only catch the first Pokémon you encounter on each route/area. You must nickname every Pokémon you catch. You cannot catch duplicates or any Pokémon in the same evolutionary family.
Half-Wit's rules: No healing items may be used except berries bought for you by your Mom. If the first encounter in an area is one you've caught or evolved, you may skip it for the next encounter. If you encounter a shiny, you may catch and use it. After defeating all 8 Johto Gyms, you may revive one dead Pokémon of your choice. You may choose to save this revive for later, but can only do this ONCE in-game! Let the Nuzlocke begin!
Ring! Ring! Ring! The alarm clock blared loudly throughout the small bedroom, shaking violently.
"Ugh…" A hand slapped the clock, knocking it off the nightstand, then it retreated back under a blanket covering a bed.
Sunlight slowly began filling the room, revealing a shelf full of Pokemon stuff, a laptop and TV, and various other items. Giant robot toys lined wall-mounted shelves and dirty clothes were piled on the floor. The light eventually made its way to the lower left corner of the room where the bed rested, awakening the person buried beneath the covers. He kicked them off and groggily sat up. He wore a Batman t-shirt and a pair of jogging pants and had a five-o'clock shadow.
"Morning already," he moaned. He picked up his alarm clock and looked at the time; six-thirty AM Johto time. "Guess it's time to get dressed." He took his pajamas off and put on his trainer's outfit and hat.
"Mike? Are you up?" A feminine voice asked. A woman opened his bedroom door and peeked in. "Good, you're actually awake. You're not oversleeping this time!"
"I know mom, I know," Mike replied groggily.
"And I hope you keep up with your Pokemon trainer's license this time!" Mike just groaned groggily. "Also, you Poke Gear came back from the repair shop." Mike's mom shoved the device in his face. "You're lucky it wasn't smashed to bits! Honestly, what were you thinking? Picking up that box by yourself!"
"It was my job, mom…" Mike answered, still half-asleep.
"Well, you should've let the Machoke lift that box." Mike raised his eyebrow at his mom. "Oh, don't give me that look. Professor Elm is waiting for you over at the lab. You know, you're lucky he's giving you a second chance, with you challenging all those gyms without a license!"
"Okay," Mike said with a yawn. "I'm heading out. I'll talk to you later." Mike stumbled out the door, holding a mug of coffee.
"Be careful! Don't associate with thugs!" His mom yelled after him.
Mike was an adult male in his early twenties. He had lived in New Bark Town most of his life, going to school and doing odd jobs here and there to help out his single mom. Today, he was finally going to live out his dream of being a Pokemon Trainer. Most of his classmates started their Pokemon journeys long ago, but Mike got left behind. He did start an unofficial journey when he was 17, but lost his trainer's license and had his Pokemon taken from him. Now that his ban had been lifted, he has been given another shot at living out his dream to become a Pokemon trainer.
"Ugh, I hate coffee," Mike groaned as he swallowed a mouthful of java, still trying to wake up. He took one step off his front porch when something round and blue smacked him in the face; a Marill!
"Marill! Get back here!" A female voice screamed. Before Mike could peel the Aqua Mouse Pokemon off of him, it bit him on the face. Mike screamed in pain and dropped his coffee.
"Get this frakking thing off me!" Mike pulled on the Marill with all his strength, but to no avail.
"Marill!" The Marill happily let Mike go and ran behind a girl around Mike's age. "Aw, Marill wanted to say good morning to you!"
"That thing tried to eat my face off!" Mike yelled. Marill growled at him.
"Mike! How could you say that?"
"It's true! I got the teeth marks to prove it!" Mike pointed to his face which, indeed, had several puncture wounds from Marill's small but sharp teeth.
"Those could've come from any Pokémon! How do you know a Zubat didn't come in your room and do that while you were asleep last night?"
"Lyra, that doesn't even make any sense…"
"Hey, it can happen!"
"Whatever, I'm heading off to the lab…"
"Oh, later Mike!" Lyra waved after him as Mike plodded off to the lab, rubbing his sore face. Marill growled viciously after him.
Mike was about to enter the lab, when something caught his eye. There was a kid hiding in the bushes beside Elm's laboratory. He was wearing some sort of weird purple suit and a Guy Fawkes mask, and had dark red hair. Mike knew who this guy was…
"Peyton! What the hell are you doing?"
"Shut up! I'm on a mission to save Johto from the evil government!"
"Whatever," Mike sighed. "Oh, and stop messaging me on Pal-book."
Mike went inside, leaving Peyton outside. He walked into Professor Elm's research room. The room was a mess! Boxes were stacked everywhere and papers, charts, and open books were strewn across the desks and floor. Professor Elm himself was hunched over his laptop, typing like a madman. He was the ultimate authority on Pokémon evolution and one of the smartest guys Mike knew, but he was unorganized, awkward, and overly devoted to his research. Mike had been working as a handy man for Professor Elm since his first foray into Pokémon training went awry.
"Ah, Mike! Here to pick up your Pokémon, I see?" Elm asked, not looking up from his screen.
"Yup," Mike answered. "I'm leaving as soon as I get my starter."
"There are three in the machine, Chikorita, Totodile, and Cyndaquil. You can only pick one."
"I picked Chikorita last time, so I think I'll go with this one." Mike grabbed the Pokeball labeled "Totodile." The ball opened up in a blinding flash, and a small, blue, bipedal alligator stood beside Mike. He wore a fedora and had a necklace made of gator teeth around his neck.
"'Ello, mate!" He exclaimed with an Aussie accent, causing Mike to jump back.
"Wha-but…I thought… Pokémon could only say their names!"
"I don't appreciate you stereotyping, mate," the Totodile warned bearing his teeth. "Didn't it ever occur to you that all Pokémon could talk? That we could say more than just our names?"
"Uh, no not really… Professor, are you hearing this? Did you know Pokémon could talk like this?"
"Yeah, whatever, I think that's a great Pokémon, too…" Prof. Elm mumbled, still staring at his screen. "Oh, and about that last job, could you go to Mr. Pokémon's house on Route 30? I need to get a rare Pokemon egg from him, but I'm too busy with my research."
"More like too lazy…" Mike grumbled. "Fine, but this better be added to my last paycheck. C'mon, Totodile."
"All righty, mate," Totodile replied, following Mike out the door. "By the way, I would appreciate it if you'd call me Dundee." Dundee adjusted his fedora.
"Dundee?"
"Yeah, it's what me mum used to call me."
"Hmm, I like it! Dundee!"
The two of them trudged through the grass on Route 29. Dundee took down a few wild Pidgeys along the way, but other than that, the route was an easy one. Eventually, the two arrived in New Bark Town's neighboring city, Cherrygrove.
"Hmm, not much of a city, eh mate?" Dundee remarked.
"I said the same thing when I first came here," Mike replied.
"Hey young man!" Dundee and Mike stopped. An elderly man ran at them from the right, moving at a much faster rate than any man his age should be moving.
"Can we help ya, sir?" Dundee asked.
"Look old man, I don't need you giving us any type of building tutorial. I know what everything is and-"
"Oh, that's not why I stopped you," the old man replied. "I just noticed you're not wearing any shoes and was going to offer you my spare pair of Running Shoes." The old man held out a pair of brand new tennis shoes.
Mike looked down at his feet. He hadn't realized it until now, but he had completely forgotten to put on his shoes and socks when he left, and now his feet were dirty and covered in leaves and twigs.
"Thanks," Mike grumbled, taking the shoes from the old man. He dusted off his feet, put on a pair of socks from his backpack, and shoved his feet in his new shoes. "Hey, these feel a lot better than my old shoes. Thanks, random old man!"
"No problem, sonny! Now, I'm sure you're busy, so I'll leave you to whatever it was you were doing." Mike and Dundee waved at the old man and headed into town. "Kids these days, always in a hurry…"
"We better hit the Pokémon Center before we head on to the next Route," Mike said.
"Sounds good to me, mate," Dundee affirmed, obviously tired. The two headed inside the Center and Mike gave Dundee to the nurse.
"So, how's business," Mike asked her, trying to pass the time.
"Lousy," the nurse answered bitterly. "I spent four years and fifty-thousand Poke-dollars on medical school, then not a month after I get a job here, they replace me with this machine…"
"Wow, that sucks," Mike said nonchalantly.
"Here's your Totodile back." The nurse sat Dundee on the counter and he jumped down beside Mike. "We hope to see you again." She slumped back down in her seat.
"Later," Mike said, waving at her. He and his Pokémon left the Center and walked next door to the Poke Mart. "I'm just going to pick up some Potions. Excuse me, clerk?"
"May I help you sir?" The store clerk asked.
"I'd like to purchase five Potions, please."
"Sorry sir, but all potions have been recalled. Something happened to Silph Co.'s latest shipment of spray-based medicines, and they've all been sent back."
"Aw, what?" Mike asked in disbelief. "How long before you guys get a new shipment in?"
"We have no idea, sir. We've tried ordering in from other stores, but it's the same story at all of them. Silph Co. told us it could be weeks or even months before the problem is fixed."
"Wow," Mike replied. "I guess we can't buy anything then. Let's head out, Dundee."
"Right-o!"
The two of them headed on to Route 30. Mike pulled a branch from a tree and started using it to fend off the numerous wild Weedles that inhabited the Route; Weedle was highly poisonous, and he didn't want to risk getting Dundee or himself stung. Dundee wasn't helping, however. He was fighting them off with his claws.
"Dundee! Don't do that! You'll get stung! I don't have any Antidotes and we're too far away to get back to Cherrygrove in time if you get poisoned."
"Don't worry 'bout me, mate!" Dundee stomped on a Weedle, squishing it. "I can take care of me self!" The two of them trudged through the grass, where they finally arrived at a house. Dundee peeped inside one of the windows.
"Don't bother, Dundee. Mr. Pokémon's house is farther north. This is just some crazy man who's obsessed with-"
"Apricorns!" The man inside yelled, opening his door and crushing Dundee against the side of the house. "I love, love, love apricorns! Here take this Apricorn Box!"
"Uh, thanks?" Mike took the huge, cooler-like box. "But you already ga-"
"Any time!" The man then began twitching. "Apricorns!" He screamed at the top of his lungs as he ran back inside his house.
"Ugh, me snout…" Dundee groaned, rubbing his sore snout. "Who the hell was that bloke?"
"Some crazy man…" Mike tossed the apricorn box over his shoulder, where it landed in a huge pile of apricorn boxes. "I already have one of these."
The two wandered farther north, bypassing the road and cutting through more high grass, battling any Weedle or Pidgey that came their way. After a long bout of fighting Weedle and knee-high grass, they finally made it to a quaint little house surrounded by trees and high ledges. Smoke billowed from its smokestack invitingly.
"This looks like a nice place," Dundee pointed out.
"Yeah, Mr. Pokémon doesn't like the hustle and bustle of the city. He's an okay guy, but can get a bit touchy around Pokémon."
"He better not start grabbin' all over me," Dundee growled.
"Mr. Pokémon? You home?" Mike asked, letting himself in.
"Ah, Mike! How's Professor Elm?" Mr. Pokémon asked.
"He's fine. Still got his nose in that laptop, though…"
"He always did get wrapped up in those MMOs online…"
"You mean he's been playing computer games this whole time?" Mike groaned.
"I'm afraid so. I believe he sent you here to retrieve this." Mr. Pokémon handed Mike an egg with red and blue triangle-shaped patterns.
"That would make a huge omelet," Mike joked as he shoved the egg in his backpack.
"Oh, Professor Elm gave you another Pokémon!" Mr. Pokémon exclaimed. He picked up Totodile. "Oh, this one is quite rare! Let me examine it." Mr. Pokémon pried Dundee's mouth open to look at his teeth, but Dundee smacked him away with his tail.
"Hey, hey, hey! Hands off, mate!"
"Touchy little fellow, isn't he," Mr. Pokémon chuckled. "Professor Oak, come here for a moment!"
An elderly man with white hair and a white lab coat rose up from behind a computer system. He was upper-middle aged, somewhere around his late sixties, but his face was wrinkled and his back was slightly hunched over.
"Ah, Mike! I've heard all about you."
"Thanks Professor-"
"You're the hooligan who beat the E4 without a Pokémon trainer's license and made a fool out of the Indigo League!" He shouted angrily.
"Um, sorry?" Mike apologized awkwardly.
Oak sighed. "But, if Professor Elm believes you can be trusted with another Pokémon, then he must see something in you." Professor Oak pulled something out of his pocket. "This is my latest invention, the Pokedex. It is an encyclopedia of Pokémon, but it only catalogues the ones you capture."
"Um, Professor Oak, I have an app on my smart phone that does the same thing," Mike explained, whipping out his phone.
"Just take the damn thing," Oak asserted, shoving the Pokedex in Mike's face.
"Well, that was awkward," Dundee said, following Mike out the door.
"It always is when I come here…"
"Say, if you don't mind me asking, what did you do to get your first trainer's license revoked?"
"Well, I had finally beaten the Elite Four on Indigo Plateau, but when they went to register my trainer's card for the Hall of Fame, I didn't have it. Turns out I dropped it somewhere along the way!" Mike grinned sheepishly and Dundee fell on the ground in a face-fault.
The two of them took the shortcut back to Cherrygrove City, jumping ledges to avoid the grass. Dundee had been injured during their trek through the grass. They made it into the city fairly quickly and after a quick stop at the Pokémon Center, the duo was ready to head back to New Bark Town. But before they left, a red-haired boy stopped them…
"Peyton, what the hell do you want?"
"Mike, why the hell didn't you respond to my Pal-Book message, you a-hole?" Peyton asked angrily.
"Because I was busy... Why the hell am I even friends with you on there anyway?"
"Because I'm more awesomer than you and I'm going to save Johto from the aliens and lizard men!" Peyton hoisted a Pokeball high in the air. "And I'll do it with this Pokémon I rescued from the lab!"
"You mean stole?" Mike asked.
"No!" Peyton snapped. "I've had it up to here with you! You never reply to me on Pal-book, you always avoid me in public, and you're helping out that Illuminati member, Professor Elm!"
"Have you been smoking something?" Mike asked.
"Battle time!" Peyton yelled, sending out his Pokémon, a Chikorita.
"Well, looks like you get to fight your first battle, Dundee!" Mike said.
"This'll be too easy, mate!" Dundee walked up to the Chikorita and scratched it lightly.
A critical hit! The Chikorita passed out from the attack, heavily wounded.
"Damn you, you anti-Johto, Illuminati-supporting son of a bitch!" Peyton ran off in a huff, taking his Chikorita with him.
"Wow, overkill Dundee?"
"I barely touched it, mate!" Dundee defended, shrugging his shoulders.
After another bout of jumping over ledges, they reached New Bark Town. Mike went into Professor Elm's lab where he was met by policeman and carnage. Bullet holes peppered the walls, burned papers were scattered everywhere, and Elm was having a panic attack in the middle of the room.
"Professor Elm, what happened?"
"He's in shock, son!" The officer answered. "Who are you? Don't you know this is a crime scene!?"
"Hey, this must be the culprit!" Another police officer exclaimed. He drew his pistol and pointed it at Mike. "Hands up!" Mike backed away slowly, doing as he was told.
"Wait!" A voice cried out. Just then, a Marill jumped on Mike bit him on the face again. "He's innocent!" Lyra ran into the lab, holding a picture in her hand.
"Do you have any proof?" The officer asked.
"I was taking a picture of my Marill and caught this by accident." Lyra handed the officer the photo; Marill stood at the center, smiling brightly, but behind him in the bushes, was a red-haired man.
"Hmm… Professor, does this man look familiar to you?" The officer showed Prof. Elm the photo, causing him to freak out.
"That's the maniac! Don't let him get me!" Prof. Elm climbed on top of a bookshelf in fear.
Mike finally pried Marill off of his face. "Yeah, that was Peyton. He took off towards Violet City."
"How do you know him?" The officer asked suspiciously.
"I barely know him, actually. He friended me on Pal-Book and messages me all the time about his conspiracy theories. I think he's finally gone off the deep end."
"Very well, you're story checks out. We'll put out an APV on him. Good luck on your adventure, kid!"
The policemen left and Elm climbed down. Lyra, Mike, Dundee, and Professor Elm then started to clean up the mess.
"Oh, Professor I got that egg," Masaki remembered.
"Oh! Let me see!" Elm exclaimed. Mike pulled it out of his backpack. "Wow, I've never seen anything like it before!" Professor Elm placed it inside a clear glass device on his desk. "At least now I have something to do while I wait for my insurance money so I can buy a new laptop and get back to playing World of Warcra… I mean, research!"
"Whatever," Mike said. "I'm heading out."
"Wait!" Professor Elm cried. "Take these with you!" Professor Elm handed Mike a handful of red and white balls with little buttons in the center.
"Sweet, Pokeballs! Now I can add some new team members!" Mike ran out the door, Dundee behind him. "We'll catch something here on Route 29, then cut up to Route 46 and catch a Geodude! That will be so freaking useful against Faulkner!"
Mike wandered around in the grass and ran across a Pidgey, quietly scratching the ground. Dundee was on it, and surprised the Tiny Bird Pokémon. Dundee scratched it, but the Pidgey countered with a vicious tackle. Dundee slapped the Pidgey with his tail, knocking it backwards. Mike through a Pokeball at it, catching it.
"Woo, got our first team member!" Mike exclaimed. Dundee celebrated with him. "Now let's see our new teammate!" Mike opened the ball and the Pidgey popped out.
"Ugh, that really smarts," it said, rubbing its head.
"So, what's your name?" Mike asked.
"Zephyr…" the Pidgey answered back, still quite sore from the attack.
"Awesome! Welcome to the team, Zephyr! Now let's go catch a Geodude!" With Zephyr perched on his hat, the three of them marched through the gates to Route 46, where they encountered a Spearow.
"Aw, what?" Mike groaned. "I guess we'll catch it…"
Zephyr charged the Spearow and hit hard, but the bird Pokémon countered by pecking at Zephyr ferociously. Battered, Zephyr flapped its wings to blow up sand to escape, but the Spearow hit it again.
"Damn, that's the most vicious Spearow I've ever seen…" Mike said in awe.
"This is ridiculous!" Dundee shouted. "Switch me out before the Sheila gets herself killed!"
"Hang on, she's got this…"
Zephyr took another hard hit. She was hurt badly, holes pecked all in her body. This Spearow was insane! Sand all in its eyes, the Spearow attacked again, but Zephyr flew out of the way. Zephyr then tackled the Spearow and Mike tossed a Pokeball at it, catching it.
"Good catch, mate!" Dundee congratulated.
"Good work, Zephyr!" Mike patted her on the head. "Ride in here until we get to the Pokémon Center." Mike gently stuck Zephyr in the backpack. "Now, let's meet our new teammate."
With a blinding flash, the Spearow was released from her Pokeball. She had a sinister look on her face, as she groomed her tattered wings. Her face had a scar across her left eye and her beak was sharpened to a point. Her talons were long and unkempt, perfect for catching prey.
"Pretty impressive for a bird, eh?" The Spearow bragged. "I'm Kim, and you should consider an honor to have me on your team, trainer!"
"I'd rather you be a Geodude," Mike mumbled, angering Kim.
"What the hell? You'd pick me over a stupid rock! C'mere you little…" Kim attacked Mike, pecking him on the head. Dundee laughed.
"Hey mate, if we wait 'till dark, you can catch a Hoothoot! Then we can call ya bird-keeper!" Dundee chuckled.
"Shut up!" Mike wailed as Kim scratched his face with her claws.
After a bit of training on Route 29, Mike healed his Pokémon and bought a few more Pokeballs and headed through Route 30. There, he caught a Kakuna named Una.
"Dammit! Why couldn't you have been a Weedle? At least you'd be able to attack…"
"Too bad," Una replied. Mike shoved her in his backpack.
"Sorry, Dundee. Looks like you're the only guy on the team."
"No worries, mate! I don't mind being surrounded by ladies…" Dundee winked at Kim and Zephyr, who gave him a disgusted look.
The four of them pushed north, where they battled a few easy trainers and grinded a bit before finally heading into Route 31. There at the beginning of the route was the entrance to Dark Cave. Mike and his Pokémon team peered inside the uninviting blackness of the cave.
"We're not going in there, are we?" Zephyr asked nervously.
"C'mon, love! Where's yer sense of adventure?" Dundee nudged Zephyr gently.
"It'll only be for a minute," Mike said. "I just want to catch something and we'll be on our way."
Mike cautiously stepped into the cave, his team following close behind him. It was so dark, neither of them could see three inches from their faces. Growls from various wild Pokémon reverberated throughout the cave. Mike pushed deeper and deeper, until something smacked him in the face.
"Ah! Dundee, get it off me!" Mike screamed. He ran outside with it still clinging to his face; a Zubat!
"Whoa, easy there citizen!" The Zubat said. "There's no need to be afraid. I heard you and your team wandering around in the cave, so I came to see if you needed help."
Mike blinked as he looked the Zubat over. It wore a yellow, skintight suit with the letters "BF" printed on the chest. "Wh-who are you?" Mike asked, shocked by the Zubat's appearance.
"Why, I am Batfink!" The Zubat answered, posing heroically. "Hero of Violet City, defender of justice, and all around nice guy!" After Batfink had finished his speech, Mike threw a ball at him, capturing him. Then Mike let him out. "Young man, that was uncalled for!"
"Look, I'm sorry but I need to fill out my team," Mike explained.
"Very well, as long as you help me with something," Batfink replied. "I am on the lookout for a sinister villain, Specter. He's a ghostly fellow who has been terrorizing Sprout Tower at night."
Mike thought for a moment. "Sure!" He answered, realizing that the bat Pokémon was referring to a Ghastly. "We'll rest up at the Pokémon Center first, guys."
"Sounds good to me," Una said.
"But I was just getting started…" Kim wailed, ripping the head off of a wild Weedle.
"I could actually do with a bit more training," Zephyr stated, tackling a Kakuna.
"Nope, off to the Pokémon Center!" Mike shoved his Pokémon inside. "We can't use any potions, so I'm not taking any chances. Sprout Tower will provide us with some more experience before we face Faulkner. This would be easier if I had found a Bellsprout to trade for that Onix, or found a Geodude at Route 46, but that didn't happen, so we're gonna have to train hard."
"Feh, I say we charge right in that Gym right now. I can take whatever he throws at me!" Kim bragged.
"Kim, you need to watch yourself, love," Dundee warned. "You're a bit brash, don't 'cha think?"
Kim scowled at Dundee. "You better watch it, ya Aussie bush hick, or I might just have 'ta peck your damn eyes out! And don't think I can't because I'm just a couple of levels behind you!" Kim roosted on the window sill. "Fine, I'll rest, but you better not leave without me. I'll be hungry for Bellsprout salad when I wake up…"
"That Sheila has issues…" Dundee grumbled. "She could be trouble down the road, mate. You sure you don't want to box her?"
"Nah, she'll be useful against the Azalea Gym," Mike answered. "Keep an eye on her, though. Keep an eye on everybody. I don't want to lose anyone this early in the game."
"I got 'cha back, mate," Dundee replied, looking over the other Pokémon, who were all quietly sleeping, save for Batfink, who was keeping a diligent eye out the window. A worried look spread across Dundee's face.
"Hey, everything will be fine," Mike reassured. "We just gotta stick together and work as a team." Dundee turned to Mike and gave him a fake smile, then he leaned up against the counter, put his hat over his face, and shut his eyes. Mike did the same.
"I sure hope you're right, Mike. I sure hope you're right…"
Body count: 0
Current Team: Totodile Lv. 11, Spearow Lv. 9, Pidgey Lv. 8, Zubat Lv. 5, and Kakuna Lv. 6.