This time when the others started ignoring him, they did it one by one. First came Stan and Kyle, of course, those two did everything together. Then Kenny, then Token and Jimmy and Craig and Tweek and Clyde and Wendy. Soon, Eric Cartman found himself all alone.
Except for one person.
"So...am I to understand that you're the only one still talking to me?"
Butters smiled, patting him on the shoulder.
"Yes indeedy, Eric!" he chirped.
"You. The only one who still cares about me aside from Mom and Mister Kitty."
"Well, sure I am! Look, I got nothing against the other fellas and I understand why they're all sore at you-"
"Butters, I farted in Tweek's face! It's not like I tried to kill all the Jews again or gave anyone AIDS!" Cartman reminded him.
"I guess they thought it was the last straw or something," Butters said. "I still think they're being a little silly, but I can't hold it against 'em." He smiled, hugging Cartman. "But anyway, Eric, don't you worry! As long as I'm around you'll always have a true-blue friend! No one should be left all alone in the world, that's just sad."
Cartman sighed. On one hand, it wasn't like he missed Stan and Kyle and Kenny and everyone else, and anytime he did all he had to do was remind himself how much they sucked. On the other hand, being stuck with Butters was probably worse than being all alone.
Then again, he would need someone to take the blame for him, someone to borrow money from and someone to take it out on when things got too messed up. Butters had always been very good at those things.
"Thank you, Butters," he said, almost with sincerity. "As far as stupid assholes go, you're not so bad."