Dangerous perfection.
Mini Preface.
I sat in pain and anguish looking at his ghostly, ill face. His eyes wide shut lost in another world. The faint sound of his breath as it shuddered, weakening with each second that passed by. My heart was pounding to break out of my chest, and my heart felt weakened and sick as I thought of what was to come, gripping his hand tightly in mine, holding on to his last few breaths. How can I live with myself if he died? How, when it is my fault! ALL my fault!
Bella
It was the usual, groggy boring day in the painfully boring town of Forks. I woke to the sound of the rain hammering against my window, and sighed in annoyance. There goes the skimpy dress I had planned for school today, I thought. A sharp groan came out of my mouth as I slashed the covers off of me and onto the floor, angry and frustrated, just like every morning. Charlie, my useless father, had already left for work, as I could hear the humping against my bedroom wall coming from my mother, Renee, and her secret lover. I grimaced, not really caring what my parents did, as long as they left me the fuck alone!
My phone started vibrating on my bedside table, and I grinned, knowing instantly who the caller was.
"Alice" I said, grinning wildly. She always rang every morning, at the same time. It was customary for her to check my choice of outfit that day, and report back to our third little group member Rosalie. After all I was the group leader, and if you wanted to be in our group you followed my exact orders, whether you liked them or not.
"BELLS! I'm having an absolute fucking nightmare right now!" She moaned, in annoyance. I rolled my eyes and held back a laugh at her pure dramatic flamboyance. "Seriously Bells it's not fucking funny, I could really hang myself right now!" I heard a bang at her end, as she kicked something and groaned in anger now.
"Calm down Alice! No need for the dramatics this morning, we've got enough problems with the newbies coming in to town, I don't need to be dealing with your breakdowns on top of it!" I angrily pointed out.
"Sorry Bells" She said, sighing in defeat. Nobody dared stand up to me, not even Alice, who was pretty much the closest thing I had to a sister.
"Now tell me the problem...cutting out all the un-necessaries!" I demanded.
"Wardrobe nightmare, to put it finely!" She stated. I rolled my eyes at her again. She had two rooms bigger than her gigantic bedroom, filled with neatly placed outfits, all organised in perfect order. It was like walking into Sacs! I would have been jealous, if it weren't for the fact we owned three actual designer stores, which we could shut down any time we wanted and take anything for free, and then just sell it on to the wannabes! I had unlimited access to stuff two months before anyone else, including all the A-listers. Such is the life.
"Well I was going to wear that black, slutty, mini, but judging by this crap weather, mini is out and leather is in! I don't want to see a damn mini on anyone got it?" I ordered.
"Got it!" She answered.
"Go for your skinny's, halter, all the silver and black accessories you can find, and tell Rosalie the same, today were going to look hotter than hot! And you better not wear anything below a 4 inch heal" I hung up and threw my phone to my bed. It was stressful being in charge, and sometimes felt a little boring, but that was what Forks high school was like. If you weren't a somebody you were nothing. The school was over crowded with the richest kids in the whole state of Washington. Their were generally 6 different groups in our school. The preppies (commonly known as the stalker-wannabes), who were so desperate to be cool they would hang on your every word and mimic everything you said, did, wore and it was rather disturbing and irritating! The scholars (commonly known as shit-poor-nerds) who didn't have a dime to their name but were total ass nerds who sucked up to the teachers and got ridiculously high marks in every single thing they did. Hated them with a passion. The losers...need I say any more without vomiting all over my gorgeous new leathers? The jocks (commonly known as the hot guys of the school) who were sporty, non intellectual, and just wanted to jump your bones and ogle your goods. The outsiders (who were commonly known as the 'actual real hotties' of the school) because they generally consisted of your typical bad boy characters, who hid their stonned eyes behind black sunglasses, wore all black, and never smiled. Their only contact with you was either to stick their finger up at you or somewhere else in you, and they generally hung around in two's or solo. And then there was us...The bitches. Me, Alice and Rosalie, not counting our little minions Jane, Tasha, Lauren and Leah, who followed us around like puppies with real longing in their eyes. They were practically our 'staff' as such! We were complete bitches, through and through. Screwed our friends boyfriends, messed around with married men, treated everyone we hated like pure shit, and never fucking cared about anyone else but ourselves. We were hot and we knew it!
And today was no different. I pulled up outside of school, in the black BMW that drove me to school every morning, and exited racking in all the gasps from on-lookers. My black leather skinny pants hung to my legs, showing them for what they were, hot. I added a gorgeous, royal blue halter top that paraded my cleavage for all to see, and flashed my small but hot curves for girls to cry at, and boys to salivate. And topped it off with 6 inch black, strappy heals, 1 carat diamond ear studs and a couple of silver bangles completing my look. I grinned wickedly at the reaction I got as I walked to meet Alice and Rosalie who were waiting by their cars. Rosalie owned a red BMW convertible, and Alice owned a yellow porches. They waved as I glided over, and threw myself into a girlie hug. Alice had followed my instructions perfectly. She wore her gorgeous blue skinny jeans that had holes cut in them to look kind of stylish punk, and a green, tight halter neck with matching green stilettos. Rosalie was wearing her washer grey skinny jeans, black and white thick heels, and a grey halter with all the right accessories. We looked positively hotalicious as we entered the school that we owned, grinning to ourself knowingly as every person's mouth we passed dropped to the ground. Victory!
Edward
FUCK! I exclaimed throwing my empty pack of cigarettes to the floor and kicking the bed in rage. I couldn't find my cigarettes anywhere and I was fucking desperate for a smoke. "Maybe if you cleaned your room" Carlisle suggested, pissing me off further. As if I wanted to fucking tidy a room up, I just wanted a damn smoke was that too much to ask? I fell to the ground pushing all the clothes that had been their for weeks and had gone crusty, out of the way whilst I searched for the packet I knew I had.
"Here have mine!" Emmett offered, laughing to himself at my doorway. I grimaced at him for finding this funny, by willingly snatched the packet he was offering from his hand, and hurriedly chucked a cigarette into my salivating mouth, sighing relief as the coarse taste burned my throat, satisfying my craving. "Your dry, you need a fix!" Emmett said, seriously now. I could tell he was just using my anger for an excuse to go get himself a fix. He just needed me along for the ride, and to be perfectly honest I wasn't fucking opposed. Anything to take the focus away from the first day back at school. A new school I might add!
Carlisle, mine and Emmett's dad, had been offered a job at Forks' hospital, and since he preferred boring, wanky, half empty towns with barely any trouble, it was perfect. He also wanted to get me and Emmett away from the bustling city of New York, where he knew we had fallen into some wild, partying habits. When he had said we were moving to a smaller town, we expected somewhere on the outskirts of New York, somewhere where people were still living, but not this fucking shit hole. It was like the walking dead here. Emmett hated it to. He fucking understood me more than any other ass hole, and vice versa. He was a year older than me, but you wouldn't of guessed by the way I was always looking after him when it should be the other way round. Emmett had, had a hard time after our mother died just over 6 years ago now, when I was 11. He started hanging out with the town gangster's who loved having fresh meat in their group, as someone to standby whilst they illegally sold drugs to street buyers. It was good for them because Emmett had always been this bulky, huge, scary looking beast that nobody wanted to fuck with, so they showed him the trick of the trade. At 14 he'd had his first shot of heroin and crack and he was thereafter hooked on the shit. When two of the gang members were shot dead in some dodgy exchange one day, Emmett decided to leave the gang life behind and just live life as a depressed, brooding, drug taking teenager. He gave me my first pipe, at aged 15. We sat on the edge of a really, fucking tall sky scraper, and smoked the shit till dusk screaming shit down at the little tiny dots below us, and washing the bad taste in our mouth down with pure, straight up, Russian Vodka. I vomited down on all the little tiny dots, and then laughed it off thinking the mother fuckers deserved it. That's when Emmett got arrested and I got a night in a hospital ward, on a drip. Lot's of nights like that followed. Piss ups in random places, high usage of class A drugs, and many nights either in wet, dusty, cold cells or warm, sticky, sickly hospital beds. We were practically killing ourselves, but we didn't give a fuck. Once damaged always damaged. So the decision was simple for Carlisle. To get us away from the temptations of city life. As if we couldn't find any drugs here in this town!
"Oh by the way, Carlisle's bringing some slut over for dinner on Saturday. Some nurse he met at the hospital. Ellie or Elsie or something like that any way! Just a word up!" Emmett said as we grimaced in unison. Carlisle had the fortunate quality of looking like a 20 year old model, when he was really 43. Girls salivated over him every where he went, but he always turned them down or if he did start anything with them it wouldn't last long. He missed our mother, Elizabeth, more than we ever realised. He'd still cry over her, but I guess he had found some bint to take her place already, and I wasn't very pleased whatsoever. I grinned at the wicked thought of making this women's life a living hell as soon as she entered those doors. VICTORY!
Alice
Just another start to another boring day. It didn't matter whether it rained or shone like the golden city, it was always the same. A drag. Nothing to do but pretend that I'm ok living the crazy, out of control, roller-coaster every damned day of my life. Pretending, and putting on a front all the time.
"Your not wearing that are you?" My mother protested, as I dragged myself down the staircase.
"Of course, it's hot mom!" I exclaimed.
"Sweety! Your absolutely stunning, you don't need to wear stuff like this! You look like your going clubbing. It's only school hunny!" Right! Only school. Forks high school was not just a school! Only a hot bed for under-age drinking, drug taking, sex and making other people's lives a living misery. If you weren't part of the in-crowd (as they say) you'd spend your days wishing that you were dead. Not that being 'in' was any different! My mother, Esme, one of the greatest mother's of all time, gave me her pleading frown. She knew she couldn't stop me from wearing these over-dressy clothes, but it didn't stop her from trying her best to make me be the little girl I used to be.
"Mom, this is what we all wear! Don't worry I'll wear a jacket or something!" I promised, even though I knew she knew I'd just stuff the jacket under my chair or in my boot before I got to school. She smiled any how, her sad, defeated smile, and watched me drive off, like she always did. I felt bad but if only she knew the true horror of life as one of the 'bitches'. It wasn't easy.
I pulled up outside the building, sighed and fixed my confident smile. As usual I checked my review mirror to make sure my short, spiky black hair was all in place, and sighed in relief knowing how lucky I was to have perfect, non difficult hair. Rosalie was lucky that way to. She was blessed with long, luscious, curly blonde locks, that made her look goddess like. There was never a lock out of place, and she didn't suffer from frizz or split ends. I could see girls in school clutching at their scissors, just dying to cut her hair off. People hated her for it, but she didn't care. Bella had more of a flat hair style. It was naturally straight, but lacked any bounce. Not that, that mattered, since she had her own personal hair stylist that came to her house every morning to make her look like a rock star. I always thought Bella looked great with her natural hair. Not many girls could pull of the flat, straight look but she could, because she had this natural beauty awe surrounding her.
"You look hot Al!" Bella enthused as we made our way into the school oozing sex, confidence and downright bitchy-don't-fuck-with-me-ness! I was thankful we only had two classes together. Maths and English, two of the worst subjects in the history of subjects. Drama was definitely my thing, and I had it with the hottest guy in school. Jasper. I had crushed on him since we were at elementary school together. He was adorable, and such a sweet guy you couldn't help but love him. Even Bella adored him at one point. That is until that summer, the summer we never talk about, that changed all our lives for the worst. Then we came here, and he became the school freak, secluded from everybody, because talking to him would kill your reputation. So I had to be careful, until I figured out a way to get to him without jeopardizing my social life.
"Guys, see you at lunch! We have important shit to discuss! I have all the down low on the newbies, it is fucking raging!" Bella exclaimed, excited. We said our goodbyes, French cheek kissing style, and ran off to our classes. Man I couldn't wait until last period! Drama with Jasper. A place where I can pretend to be somebody else! Someone Jasper would like and even grow to love. Someone who is not afraid to be herself, and tell people the truth. Someone...victorious!
Jasper
"FREAK!"
"LOSER!"
"FUCKING VIRGIN PUSSY!"
"THERE GOES THE BIBLE BASHING FREAK-O-ZOID!"
Just another day of the same old taunts and empty words from the brainless socialites of the most sinful school in Washington. As if it actually bothers me.
"NOTHING I HAVEN'T HEARD BEFORE!" I'd shout back, smiling proudly because I knew it pissed them off when I was cocky and unmoved by their lame attempts at trying to bring me down. I sat at my usual table in the corner of every classroom, alone, the way I liked it and doodled away whilst listening to the teacher intently. I was a pro for multi-tasking. A grade student, perfect record, not a hint or sprinkle of sin or debauchery like the rest of the kids here! They would try their upright best to break me down, by placing pages from playboy magazine in my locker, or passing me notes that degraded god's name in the most vile way, but I shoved it off knowing it was just another day like the rest, and that eventually these people would grow up to be brainless nobodies, junkies, prisoners or living in run down trailers, with 6 kids to feed and wondering why life went so wrong for them. Karma was a bitch.
After History class I took my place at the smallest cafeteria table in the lunch room, alone, as usual, and sat with my salmon sandwich's, coffee, packet of oreo's and bible, and delved into Genesis chapter 12. I could feel the eye's on me, burning my skin, but I never looked up, because all they wanted was another chance to lash more pathetic taunts in my face, anything to see some kind of rise. The usual jock 'accidentally' spilt his usual leftover food onto my lap, causing a huge uproar of laughter in the room. And then just as I was waiting for my usual morning juice shower from the usual cheerleader, there was a sudden silence to the room. I looked up, curious to see what possible thing could have possibly shut these deadbeat's mouths tightly closed, and then rolled my eyes. Newbies. The only thing more interesting to these people than me. At least they'd have some new toys to play with for a while, leaving me alone. Or so I thought. As I turned back to read more from Genesis I caught an interesting glare from one of the girls. I frowned, confused why she would be looking at me, when everybody's attention was fixated on these new kids. Plus she was one of the 'leaders' of the popular crowd, or whatever they called themselves, so it was a necessity that she would be glaring at them and not me. But she wasn't. Her beautiful golden, Topaz eyes, piercing into mine like drippy honey. She was without question the most angelically, beautiful girl in the whole of the school. Alice Brandon. And I had been in love with her since the first time I saw her in elementary school, in her cutest little pink and white butterfly dress, and pink ribbon that tied her silk black hair together. She was magnificent. And we were best friends. Until after that summer, which I remember so well, when she came back no longer with pretty ribbons in her hair, or cute print dresses. No longer with her long black silk hair. No longer with her adorable, happy little smile, or free spirited awe. She was dark, and distant, and had chopped her hair to shreds. Her and her nasty friend Bella, whom spread personal, agonising stuff about me and my family around school and the entire neighbourhood just to get back at me for trying to take Alice away from her, which was not true. She had changed, and she no longer spoke to me, or wrapped her tiny little long arms around my neck, clutching at me like I was her favourite teddy bear. I never saw her look at me again. Until now. And I had to wonder, why? What did she want? Some kind of ploy to bring me down? If anyone could it would be her. As Hazlitt once said "Faith is necessary to victory". And Alice definitely was...victorious!