Halloween Scrooge for the Cullen's Bullpen October Challenge.
Rating: T for a wee bit of language ( and for those of you that know me, I know you're shocked, no M rating, no sexual warning. I know, I know it's shocking but lets see what you think of just a godd old fashioned yarn.)
A/N: Please review as they are the reward for my efforts and the proof that someone is actually out there at the other end of this screen.
Temperance was tired, beyond tired, to the point where she had crossed that invisible line of restlessness where she could not fall asleep. She was irritated with Booth, he had been relentless today, wanting her to come over tomorrow for Halloween to carve pumpkins and go trick or treating with Parker, then he wanted to drop the child at his mothers and go out in costume. She had told him no at least a dozen times. He had been asking her out for weeks now and she had refused to go anywhere that was not directly case related. She had shut him out after finding out about Cam, it had just been too much. She didn't even want to analyze why, she just knew she hit a wall and needed to shut everything down. Normally she would just move on but he wouldn't let that happen, he kept asking her to go out, to go to dinner, to go to lunch, it was really getting annoying.
Then there was Angela, almost as bad as Booth with her persistent request for Temperance to join her at a Halloween bash at some bar. She had been distancing herself there too. It just seemed like the organized life she had with the people she considered her friends had been turned up side down lately. She had seen them turn against each other, make questionable ethical decisions and sacrifice their work integrity. She had been hurt by them, betrayed by their knowledge of Booth's affair with Cam, but on an even more personal level, they had abandoned the empirical methods of science that she had once used to guide her team. She had stepped back then, letting them follow Cam's lead, she didn't have to participate and she felt no need to compete, she knew she was the best in her field so she concentrated on just doing her job. Actually she was starting to feel better, until this week, when everyone seemed to become obsessed with trying to get her to do something for Halloween. They were all trying to use this holiday as an excuse to get her to go out, as though it hadn't been her choosing in the last few weeks but merely the absence of an appropriate occasion that had kept her from socializing with them.
She didn't want to be rude, she just wanted to be left alone. Why couldn't they all just leave her alone? Temperance curled onto her side trying to push the thoughts out of her brain. Hodgins had called her a Halloween Scrooge, she only had a vague idea what that meant and no inclination to ask him for details. She had turned and left for the night even though it had only been 5 o'clock; she had been there for the last 35 hours straight and needed to lie down where she couldn't be interrupted. She closed her eyes, stretching out and feeling the sheets slide across her aching muscles. She had briefly wondered at the irony of them wanting to celebrate a holiday of the dead when they already spent most of their time with dead people. She didn't believe in the after life, ghosts, gods, demons, spirits and all that nonsense, she believed in science. She turned again, searching for that spot that would be so comfortable her body would relax into sleep. She began reviewing cases in her head until at last, sleep took her.
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It was cold and Temperance was unsure of where she was so she stood for a moment trying to get her bearing. Her feet were bare and she was standing on what felt like a wooden floor, she was wearing her sweats and a tank top. As her vision seemed to clear she realized she was in a hallway, at the end was a large wooden door, it looked worn and heavy and she couldn't recall having ever seen one like it. There was a design carved into the door and she moved toward it to try and determine where she might be. At first she thought it was lettering but on closer inspection she realized it was more like some form of hieroglyphics although not from any civilization she knew.
"Temperance Brennan." The voice was so low and so loud she felt the vibration through her feet and into her sternum. She spun around to see a hooded figure, all in black, looking very much like the imaginary grim reaper. She almost laughed out loud, she was dreaming, she had to be dreaming and even as she thought it she knew it was true. She tried to wake herself, concentrated on her room and struggled to push her eyes open but it wasn't working.
"You can't wake yourself from this dream Temperance; you will only wake when it's over. This night is a gift to you, a gift from those that you have helped to find eternal peace, if you use it wisely you can have more that you ever imagined out of life, if not, well…"
Her humor faded as she stared into the hood searching for some hint of features but there seemed to be only a liquid darkness, shifting slightly as he spoke. Dream or not it was starting to give her a creepy feeling and somehow this gift didn't sound like anything on one of her shopping lists.
She opened her mouth to speak and he silenced her with a simple shake of his head, no she was not to speak yet.
"Tonight there will be three knocks at the door, three children will come to you one at a time. You will answer the door and when they say trick-or-treat, you will tell them you want to see a trick and then you will give them a treat. You will do exactly as you are instructed, do you understand?"
Temperance stood stunned for a moment, questions racing through her brain. "Who are you?"
"You know who I am." As he spoke a chill passed over her, goose bumps raised on her skin and beneath the hood she once again sensed movement within the black landscape and even though she didn't find the answer acceptable she didn't want to ask it again.
"What kind of a treat am I supposed to give them?" She realized as she spoke that she had just consented to be a part of this charade.
He reached into his robe and produced a small black bag and held it out to her but she only looked at him. "Take it and don't open it until you are handing them a treat."
Before she could think she was reaching for the bag, as she took it from his grasp he slipped a black crusted finger out and stroked it on the back of her hand. Temperance snapped her hand back; his touch had been ice cold and rough, like running your finger against fish scales. She rubbed her hand where he had touched her, surprised that her skin still felt cold. She looked at him quizzically and a deep laugh echoed from within him. She wondered again why it was she wasn't waking from this nightmare.
"You are an interesting woman; most people would have run screaming by now. You can stop concerning yourself with waking; you'll wake when I'm done with you, and not before. I believe your first guest has arrived." As soon as he finished speaking there was a knock at the door and although she only glanced at it, when she looked back, he was gone. The knocking began again and Temperance moved to the door, it was heavy to open, even if it was solid wood it still seemed disproportionately heavy and she struggled to pull it open. Pushing it firmly back she finally turned and gasped in surprise.
"Trick-or-treat." Temperance could only stare at the little girl, her mouth slack, her eyes wide with shock. The child glanced over her shoulder as though seeking solace from someone that Temperance couldn't see; when she turned back she was smiling. "Excuse me, but my brother is waiting." Temperance looked up but there was nothing but darkness beyond the porch, no lawn, no walkway, just pure uninterrupted space.
"I like your costume." It was all Temperance could manage to say, she loved the costume and remembered it well. Her mother had sat on the floor in the living room and painstakingly painted the skeleton in accurate detail onto a black leotard at Temperance's insistence.
"Halloween has two origins, in one it is the day of the dead, a celebration for those that have died, in the other you dressed to scare off spirits on the one night the Druids believed they could cross over into our world. Either way there is nothing about dressing as a Disney princess or a Power Ranger." She was smiling, glad to have someone who appreciated her attempt at authenticating the holiday and didn't dismiss her.
Temperance looked at herself, she was seven years old, her hair was under a black knit cap, her face painted black and white, the skull appearing fairly accurate with her large pale eyes swimming in her small face. She was slender and more fragile than she recalled, filled with hope, still thinking she would find a way to fit into the world. Temperance clutched her fists and felt the bag in her hand, suddenly recalling what she was supposed to say. "Show me a trick and I'll give you a treat."
Young Tempe lifted her hand, she was holding a mirror, "the best way to scare a ghost is to show them a reflection of themselves." She held up the mirror to Temperance and there was her mother, cooking in the kitchen, the scene flashed and it was her father reading the newspaper, Russ chasing Tempe in the backyard. The scenes continued to change, a playback of her childhood, all the happy moments that Temperance had shoved deep within herself because they were too painful. She felt her heart constrict in her chest with loss and longing as she watched herself happily move through life, her mother rocking and singing to her, her father helping her with a science project, Russ walking her to school. Part of her wanted to turn away, but she couldn't tear her eyes from the mirror. Every moment was there, the sound of their voices, their laughter, the way her mother said her name. Temperance was sobbing when the mirror went black.
"Why did you show me that?" Her chest was heaving as she spoke.
"Because we were happy once and you've forgotten, you left it all behind. We were happy for 15 years and you live as though our life began on the day it all ended. Everyday that you chose to forget you become less of who you really are and it's killing me, eventually I'll disappear completely from your memory and then who will you be?" Tempe put out her small gloved hand and smiled, "it's time for me to go, I can hear my brother calling." With her hand shaking Temperance opened the small black bag and reached inside, it felt as though there was just one thing in there. She pulled it out, a small candy bar with a skeleton on the front. She crouched down and placed it in the small outstretched hand.
"Thank you, and please, remember me." She opened her arms and after a seconds hesitation the child hugged her, Temperance squeezed her small frame against her, feeling a warmth pass between them she smiled softly. When she pulled away she was immediately confused, she was in bed, hugging her pillow, in her own room.
Temperance sat up, shaking her head she ran a hand over her face. What a bizarre dream, it was so detailed, so real. She was exhausted, glancing at the clock she noted that she had only been asleep for a couple of hours but she wanted to remember the dream. She decided she would throw some notes about it on her laptop before laying back down, she knew dreams had a way of fading by the time you got up the next morning. She stood and stretched, her body was sore from the long hours she had put in at work. She made her way to the kitchen to get a glass of something to drink and to locate her computer when she heard a knock at the door. It was late, who would be at her door in the middle of the night, except maybe Booth. She opened the door, fully expecting to see him there but her eyes dropped down in shock and Parker looked up at her.
"Trick-or-treat, Dr. Bones." Temperance looked around and saw no sign of Booth. Would he come with Parker in the middle of the night as some ploy to get her to go with them tomorrow? It wasn't like Booth to have Parker up so late and she didn't think even he would sink that low.
"Parker, where's your father and what are you doing here in the middle of the night?" She opened the door for the child to step inside, still half expecting Booth to step into view and smile at her. She closed the door and turned to him. He was in full costume, a pirate, with an eye patch and all. How did he get here?
"I came to see you Dr. Bones, no one else can come, you don't like them anymore." Temperance was confused, staring at him, she went to push her hair behind her ear when she noticed the black bag in her hand. Was she still dreaming? She had to be, the creepy reaper man had said three children, this must still be a dream. It would certainly explain Parker being here.
"Parker, who is it that you think I don't like any more?" He looked distressed to her; his unpatched eye was shining with the threat of tears.
"All of them Dr. Bones, my dad, Miss Angela, Mister Jack, Mister Zach and even uncle Sid. You want them all to go away." He just stared at her then and waited, so Temperance decided to say the desired statement and see what happened.
"Show me a trick and I'll give you a treat, Parker." He smiled at her then, relieved that he was able to give her his message.
"You have to look at me Dr. Bones." She knelt down to his level and he lifted the eye patch. There was no eye in the socket; just a silver sphere and she trembled slightly at the thought of what had happened to him. He blinked and images started to appear on the surface of his silver eye, first it was Angela, yelling at Booth, are you an idiot? This is going to hurt her terribly. I wish I didn't know. You have to tell her Booth, and if you don't, I will. Cam, Booth? Is there no occasion when you use both of your heads at the same time?
The next image was Zach, looking more lost and forlorn than ever, asking Jack if he thought Dr. Brennan had given up on them, if she would ever be friendly to them again. Jack sadly shook his head and said he didn't know, but he sure missed the old her. Then there was a scene with Jack explaining to Angela that really they deserved it and if Cam was a government plant to test their integrity, they had failed that test miserably.
The final image was Booth, sitting in his recliner at home holding a photo of the group from Sid's the year before Cam arrived. He was talking to himself about being stupid, about how he had let her down, how he had wanted to be the one person in her life that never hurt her. He closed his eyes and put his head back, a tear making its way down his cheek he spoke to the empty room, why didn't I tell her that I loved her before all this started? How did I let this all get so fucked up and how am I ever going to make it right? I've lost her; I can't believe I've lost her.
Parker blinked and the images were gone, Temperance heavily exhaled the breath she had been holding. She was still staring as Parker replaced the patch over his eye. "They all love you Dr. Bones, they're like your family, but you don't want that anymore, do you? Now, you just want to be left alone." Her heart was heavy at the thought of her friends feeling so wounded. She really didn't think it matter very much to them; she figured they would find their way with each other and just move forward. She hadn't shut down to hurt them; she had shut down to keep them from hurting her.
The image of Booth loomed in her mind, he loved her. Could that even be true? It was more than likely just the fantasy ravings of her subconscious mind; this was, after all, just a dream.
Parker reached out and hugged her tightly around the neck, "good-bye Dr. Bones." He released her and held out his hand. Remembering the black bag Temperance opened it and reached inside, again it felt as though there was only one item in the bag. She pulled it out and looked at it; it was a packet of candy corn with a keychain tied to it that was a small skeleton. He was delighted, the smile spreading wide across his face, looking so much like his father in that instant that her heart beat harder in her chest.
Confused by the fact she was still in a dream she decided to go get her phone and let Booth know that Parker was with her. She stepped into the living room and retrieved her bag but when she turned around he was gone. She opened the door and stepped outside to see if he had wandered out, knowing in her heart that he had never really been there. The door closed behind her and she spun around, finding it locked securely. She was angry and more exhausted than she could ever recall being in her entire life. She leaned her head against the door and closed her eyes for a moment, willing it to open. When she opened her eyes again it she was no longer outside her home, she was leaning against the heavy wooden door in the hallway that went no where. She jumped away from it when she heard the knock. With tired resignation she heaved the door back and looked to the porch.
"Trick or treat." Temperance was in awe of the child before her, she appeared to be dressed as an angel but somehow it didn't feel like a costume. Her very presence was almost transparent when she moved as though she was barely existing, her skin so pale she was luminous against the darkness behind her. Temperance wanted to touch her, to stroke her hand along the stark white wings that stood furled against her back, to smooth back the silky strand of hair that had fallen across her forehead. The urge was powerful, the draw to this child was like no feeling she had ever known and when the small face turned to her with sad eyes and lips trembling she wanted nothing more than to scoop her into her arms and fix whatever was breaking her young heart.
Once again Temperance knelt down to be at the child's level and to look more closely at this ethereal being. "Why are you so sad?" Her voice was as gentle as she knew how to be.
"I am the child that will never be." A single sparkling tear rolled over her cheek and down her chin. Temperance knew the child had a message or her but she was worried about her.
"You're here though, what do you mean?" She felt like the entire night was filled with riddles and she was tired of them.
"The way things are now, I will never be born; I am only an image of what could be."
Temperance didn't understand so she decided to see what the little girl had to show her. "Show me a trick and I'll give you a treat."
The child brought her hand up from her side and was holding a clear ball, about the size of a grapefruit. At first she thought it was a large Christmas ornament, so delicate and fragile but there was no stem. As Temperance watched a scene appeared in the center and she smiled, it was like a crystal ball from fairy tales. There was a man in a lab coat being ordered around by another man in a suit. The man in the suit was talking harshly and the younger man shuffled along, doing as he was told, cleaning slides, emptying dishes. When the man in the lab coat turned around Temperance scowled, it looked like an older version of Zach.
"It is Zach, in the future, you left the Jeffersonian and he never finished his thesis so he never received his doctorate, after Jack and Angela were gone he just gave up, became lost. His new boss is not as understanding as you once were." She couldn't believe her eyes, her brilliant assistant, an attentive student, her friend, reduced to this clean up position in the lab. It couldn't be true.
"What do you mean Jack and Angela left?"
The scene in the globe changed and she was seeing a hospital, a corridor, at the end of the hall there was a man yelling. She watched as an orderly approached him and said something to him and he settled down. As the scene drew closer she realized it was a mental institution, there were people moaning and screaming behind each of the doors. The man from the hallway drew closer, babbling to himself about the government and conspiracies. Temperance felt her stomach turn before he ever looked up and still when he lifted his head her breath caught in her throat. His blue eyes had a frantic wild look and a small muscle twitched in his cheek.
"What happened to him?" Her voice was low, weighted with grief.
"He had a psychotic break, exposure to an experimental neuro-chemical during an investigation triggered his symptoms. His paranoia escalated until he ended up here. He began going in the field after you left, he felt an obligation to step in and continue the relationship with the FBI. He really only went to oversee the transportation of the bodies back to the lab, he wasn't an anthropologist, he was just trying to prove something."
Temperance shook her head, trying to make the vision leave her brain. "Why are you showing this to me?"
The child's face was serene now, "it's not over, please keep watching."
They both turned their attention back to the ball, watching intently. A young woman was driving a car; she looked so much like Angela that Temperance knew right away that it must be her daughter. For a moment she had hope, thinking at least Angela's future had turned out well. It wasn't until the woman stepped out of the car that her destination became clear. Temperance held her breath, hoping this scene before her could not be as she thought. The woman walked a short distance after parking and stopped to look up, the stone was white marble, with Angela's name carved boldly across the front. Dead. How could Angela be dead?
"This doesn't make any sense, how could Angela be dead?" There was something about seeing Angela's name in the stone that felt like a blow to Temperance and the tears that had been threatening spilled down her face.
"She was raped and murdered on her way out of a nightclub when her daughter was two years old. It was three weeks before her first big New York showing. She didn't live long enough to see her daughter grow up or her work become a success."
"What's her daughter's name?" Temperance was openly crying now and didn't care.
"Alexis, she was raised in foster care, there was no one to take her." A loud sob came then and she heaved for breath and just as she was going to protest, the scene changed again. Temperance knew where it was going next and she didn't want to look, couldn't bear to know. She squeezed her eyes shut, but the child waited patiently.
Slowly she opened them and there he was sitting by a window, in a wheel chair, his face blank. A nurse came and got him and she realized it was a VA nursing home, the military takes care of its own, that's what he always told her. He was thin, a ghost of his former self, his eyes a dark shadow with no hint of the spark they once carried. Her heart seized at the site of him and she covered her face with her hands as she sat crying.
"He eventually rejoined the military in special ops, training snipers; he never should have been there because he just didn't care anymore. You were gone, Parker moved away with his mother, his job no longer gave him the satisfaction it once did, so with nothing to lose he went back and this was the result." When Temperance looked up the child was softly crying, her hand over the globe. "It's hard to see him like this." It struck her as odd that this child would be so reactive to the scene with Booth, as though she knew him.
"I just want all this to be over now." She was pausing, small sobs coming between her words. The globe changed again and she could see herself, standing over some bones at a table, obviously working. She looked old, her eyes cold and distant, she was not at the Jeffersonian. She saw herself at home, her world was quiet, desolate and she had become bitter and reclusive. Her face looked pinched and she seemed resigned to her own isolation. Temperance stared in disbelief. Is this what she was to become? Is this who she wanted to be? Was it enough to have left a contribution to science, without having lived an actual life? They were all so broken, so damaged and they had once been so full of life, so happy.
The small girl put the globe behind her back and looked up; the grief in her eyes seemed endless. She cried silently as she watched Temperance struggle through all she had shown her. She put out her hand and Temperance noticed that she was once again holding the black bag in her own. The treat she pulled out this time was a plastic bubble, the kind you see in bubble gum machines near the check out at the grocery store, inside was a small ring with a heart on it and some gum and a button that said Bad to the Bone. The young girl smiled and her wings rustled with her excitement.
"Do you want to wear the ring?" Temperance was poised to open the container for her.
"No, the ring is for my mother, the button is for my father and the gum is for me." She was smiling broadly now, a charming smile that melted Temperance's heart. The child hugged her and for a moment Temperance could feel her in her arms, warm and solid and then in an instant she was gone. She stood up and walked back inside, not bothering to shut the heavy door, the hooded figure was once again standing there, waiting for her.
"It's been a long night for you Temperance, I know you're tired, but you have some decisions to make about your life. Most people make decisions without ever knowing the consequences; your gift is being able to make an informed choice. Your past was shown so you would remember what it is you're giving up in your quest to be alone, the child in you that was once happy that will be forgotten. Your present was shown to you so you could see that these people care about you, they think of you as family and they realize they have hurt you, but are sorry. Sometimes we hurt people without meaning to; you should understand that very well. There will always be times that the people you love hurt you, it doesn't mean you have to stop loving them. The child in you has never stopped loving your parents, even with all the pain they caused you. The future was shown to you because this is where you are now headed. If you continue to live your life alone, not opening yourself to friendship or love, not taking any chances then what you have seen will surely be your future. This is your gift Temperance, from the dead that you have allowed to find peace, use it wisely."
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The phone was ringing and Temperance opened her eyes and blindly picked up the receiver.
"Brennan."
"Hi Bones, I thought I would give it one more shot. Parker and I are going to grab a bite to eat and then head over to the pumpkin patch; it's now or never if you want to get in on the fun. He insisted I call this morning and make absolutely sure that you didn't want to go."
She glanced at the clock, 9 a.m., she couldn't even remember the last time she slept until nine. She felt so refreshed, so relaxed. The word no was on her lips when the dream came rushing back to her. She could change her life; she could actually have a life if she would just allow herself. It was time to make things right.
"Bones? Are you there? I wouldn't be bothering you but as I said, Parker insisted, so if you want me to just tell him you have to go into work today, I will." She could hear the disappointment in his voice.
"Okay Booth, I'll go. What time are you going to be here?"
"You'll go? Really? Um, we can be there in fifteen minutes." He sounded like he was in shock, but she knew he was smiling.
"Make it twenty so I can shower." She was smiling herself. They said their goodbyes and she jumped from the bed to get ready.
Exactly twenty minutes later there was a knock at her door and after her dream she found that she jumped when she heard it and then laughed softly at herself. It was only a crazy dream. When she opened the door Booth's slow smile caught her off guard so Parkers hug was a welcome distraction. As Seeley passed her she grabbed the lapel to his jean jacket, staring at the small button that said Bad to the Bone on it.
"Where did you get that?" She looked shocked.
"Parker gave it to me this morning in a treat bag he brought over for me; he has one for you too. He said it was my present from the Halloween ghosts but personally I think Rebecca is letting him watch too many of those Halloween specials that are on right now." She leaned up suddenly and placed a kiss on his cheek.
"Wow, what was that for?"
"Because you asked me again to come with you and because I wanted to." He eyed her suspiciously before letting the grin break his face.
"Dr. Bones, I have a present for you." Parker's voice captured their attention and Temperance lifted him to the stool so she could talk to him. He handed her a small plastic pumpkin, inside was a cluster of goodies, she poured the contents onto the counter, the hair rising on her arms as she did so. One small candy bar with a skeleton on it, one bag of candy corn with a skeleton key chain tied to it and a plastic bubble with a heart ring inside.
"She ate the gum." It was out of her mouth before she could stop herself, before she was even able to think about what she was saying. She opened the plastic case and slipped the heart ring on her little finger, shaking her head in disbelief. The ring is for my mother and the button is for my father. She hugged Parker tightly, whispering a thank you to him and assuring him that she loved the gift.
"Bones, are you alright?" She was acting strangely and now he was a little worried about her.
Her head snapped in Booth's direction and she looked him right in the eyes, "never better Booth, never better in all my life."
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