Dear Readers,
I write this letter to you from an island out at sea. Now that the thirteenth installment of the tragic story of the Baudelaire orphans has been released to the public, many people want me dead. But please do not read this book, it is to dreadful for even me to read. Thats why I threw all of my copies of the book, paper, and typewriter out to sea.
I must warn you that if you dare read this story you will come face-to-face with a wooden island, fire, an enormous fortune, a rope ladder, and a near fatal experience.
I caution you once again not to read this book as it is the most dreadful of the thirteen installments in the Baudelaires lives. You've been warned.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket