I lie in the night with these casts on my legs,
Shackled and bound in the long-lasting night
Not a sound from my mouth
But the words in my head
They just won't stop coming in a torrent:
"God, why all this pain and why all these tears?
How can I know that you're truly near?
Why must I suffer if You call me Dear,
If you call me Beloved and Blessed?
"And I hear all these stories that make me weep so,
Stories of a man and a mother You know,
They argue so harshly, their relationship is gone,
How can You let this go on?
And a girl in a car that crashed just recently,
How could you let it be?
And a girl that stays in a hospital like I did,
Waiting for the time to come home,
But her problems keep coming and she never leaves there –
How can you let this happen at all?
The earthquakes, the wars, all of this mess,
Just... Why?"
And I cry,
"You say that You're here, but it doesn't seem like it!
The chaos is reigning, and I can't find a reason why...
Why to try holding on, when my hope is almost gone,
And these tears they keep falling, and the fears keep on flying,
And where are You to make it alright?
Where are You tonight?"
And worn out by yelling, I let the rain fall.
I've said my piece, and just don't care at all now –
At least, that's what I tell myself as a lie.
But I do, so I just cry, "Why?"
There's a whisper in the corner of my trembling heart,
Ready to answer if I let it start. It's saying, "Open your heart...
Open your heart to understand why.
"The world was created as perfect, remember.
Perfectly perfect, beyond all compare.
Evil was not my design in the least.
Love was the design.
Love was choice, what I gave you.
Love always involves a choice.
I saw every sin before the Creation,
And yet I made the world anyway.
Like a parent – they know their kids will disobey,
Yet they have kids anyway.
"I will make your suffering turn into good.
I Promise.
I gather up every tear that you cry;
I know your hardship, I paid the price.
I made the worst thing in history – my death –
Turn into something good. So why do you doubt
That I can't do the same for you?
"I can't explain why for every person –
I tell no one any story but their own.
But I Promise it's for the best reason ever.
They'll see, and so will you, that what I say is true.
Your suffering is an example for others
So I will be seen through you.
"And soon, it will be over,
The hard past will be worth it.
I Promise.
You'll be free from every trouble soon.
You ask, why not now?
Well, the story's not over.
You're only halfway, haven't read to the end yet.
So don't judge so quickly, because I know the end.
It won't be a Happily Ever After.
It will be a Joyously Ever After Forever.
All the pain, all the agony, gone in the blink of an eye.
And you'll wonder why you ever asked, 'Why?'
My Dear… I am here."