The Bishounen Files:

Driving Lessons...x_x!

Warning: This story makes almost NO sense what so ever, yesh....all these bishies come from different shows, so of course there is not plot or reason for it...or anything else that would be in a sane fic. ^_^

Wufei: *looks up at the DMV building* Why are we here..??

Duo: *shrugs* I dunno..it's just another attempt to write us into another weird situation..(Author: HEY!)

*The rather large group of bishounen walk to the place in a parking lot to take their driving lessons*

Kenshin: So these are cars...? *pokes one with his sakabatou (reversed-blade sword), causing the alarm to go off*

reeeoooeeoooooreoeoooooo! *Yesh..it's sound effects! x.x;*

Mirai Trunks: You sound like you've never seen a car before..

Kenshin: I haven't x_x..

Trunks: *sweatdrop*..

An old man steps out of a lil office, with funky gray hair, sunglasses, and a hawaiian shirt* Hi..my name is Howard..I'll be taking some of you on your test drive..

Ranma: *blink* Haven't we seen this guy before??

Gourry: I dunno..he looks kinda familiar..

Howard: Okay..first up..Quatre Ra..Raber..what does this say!? um..Winner.

*Quatre steps up meekly* Its Raberba..Quatre Raberba Winner *smiles all cutely*

Duo: Just rolls right off your tongue. u_u;;

Howard: This way..

*So Quatre and Howard walk over to a little silver Mercedes Benz..*

Quatre: What a nice car! Of course..its not as good as my Sandrock though..

Howard: Yeah yeah..get in.

*Quatre hops into the drivers seat* Are you sure this is safe??

Howard: Oh yeah sure..

Quatre: I don't see a cupholder for my tea cups! *looks around frantically*

Howard: Just turn on the car..

Quatre: Okay..but I'm not happy! *turns on the ignition, and the two are off*

Duo: I hope I go next! ^-^ *grin grin*

Wufei: Maxwell....

*A woman, with short dark brown hair steps out of the office next* Okay! Um..lets see..Chang Wufei! You're next!

Duo: Noooo...

Wufei: WHAT!? AN ONNA?? I'm not riding with a woman! INJUSTICE!

*The lady sees the young screaming pilot, and grabs his arm* Why hello you must be Wufei! ^^ My name is Shiina.

Wufei: WOMAN!..get you're hand off me!

Shiina: DON'T CALL ME WOMAN!!! *grabs him by the ear and drags him to a tiny, old, beat-up volkswagon bug colored mustard yellow*

*Duo starts cracking up* Have fun Wu-man! *wave*

Wufei: Wh-what kind of machine is this!? Only weaklings drive these kind of things! *points* And the color..ugh!

Shiina: AIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEE! JUST GET IN!

*Wufei freaked out by the crazy woman jumps in* x.x..what a undignified onna..

- --

Kunou: Fiends! When shall it be my turn to drive??

Ranma: As long as I don't get stuck with any of you morons..I don't care!

Hotohori: Mmm..what are these...'automobiles' all these people are talking about? *has this thoughtful/pondering type look on his face...*

Sano: I think they are those shiny things out there...but there is no way you're getting me into one of those things! *shakes his head* No! Not after that horrible..t-train..r-

Saitoh: Ah..so the Chicken is scared of some machine?

Sano: SHUT UP! I'm not scared of one of those! Watch. *goes up to a car and punches it..*

OIIEEEEEE OIEEEEEE! BEEEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP BEEEP! *goes the lil alarm..o.o* (and the sound-effects strike again..)

Sano: AHH! WHAT THE HFIL WAS THAT!? *runs and hides behind Chichiri*

Chichiri: Don't ask me, no da!

*finally another driver-teacher thingy person steps out..*

Lady: Why hello there! Let's see..I'll be taking 6 people with me! We'll be learning how to drive big automobiles..like vans! So..Hotohori, Chichiri, Nuriko, Tasuki, Sanosuke, and Saitoh! Come with me!

Saitoh: WHAT!? I have to ride with this..this..*pulls out his sword, getting into his gatotsu stance*

Sano: There is no way I'm going in THAT thing with YOU! *makes his hand into a fist*

Nuriko: ..What's with those two??

---

Back on the road with Quatre...

HONK HONK! (Look..it's another sound effect. x.x;) A car comes from behind Quatre and Howard...

Quatre: Well what is his problem!? *sticks his head out the window* WE SHOULDN'T BE FIGHTING AT ALL!!!

Howard: Um..Quatre..you're only going 15 miles in a 50mph zone..

Quatre: Yeah but..we might hurt something if we go that fast!

Howard: ....

- --

A young blonde girl steps out of the office.

Duo: Hey she's cute! She's gotta be my instructor!

The girl: Let's see..Trunks Briefs?

Duo: AWWW!

Trunks: Hehehe..um..yeah that's me! *runs up to the girl*

The girl: *smiles* Hiya! You must be Trunks?? My name is Amai! (Sweet in Japanese)

Trunks: Uh...yes.. *flashes a smile*

The girl: okay..get in the car..NOW NOW NOW! I don't want to hear any questions, GOT IT!?

Trunks: *also freaked out like Wufei earlier* ..Y-yes ma'am..*thinks to himself* Her name doesn't suit her at all..

Amai: WELL HURRY UP! WE DON'T GOT ALL DAY!

*Trunks scurries to a dark blue Ford pick-up truck and hops in*

Kain: Aren't you glad you don't have her..??

Duo: Uh-huh..

- --

Nuriko: I wanna drive this thing first! Hey it might be fun! n.n

Tasuki: Naaah..let me! I'll do much better..*grins, showing off his kawaii little fangs*

Sano: SHUT UP YOU COCKAROACH!

Saitoh: I do not want to deal with an insolent little brat like you..

Sano: WHAT WAS THAT!?

Chichiri: Uh..why don't I drive, no da?

Nuriko and Tasuki: NO!

Hotohori: Since I am the most beautiful here...I shall be the one to take this..'driver' position. What do you say madam? ^-^

The lady (let's call her..Mrs. Ichigou ^^;;): My what a lovely young lady! Sure..you can drive first!

Nuriko and Tasuki: HEY!

Hotohori: But..I am a man..

Mrs. Ichigou: Oh. o.o;

*Hotohori steps into the van, the other five bishies going to the back, and Mrs. Ichigou sitting in front*

Mrs. Ichigou: Okay, first...I need to see if you can turn the vehicle on. *smiles*

Hotohori: *sits there, staring at the lady*

Sano: STOP PUSHING!

Saitoh: Moron! You were pushing first!

Nuriko: I say I should drive!

Tasuki: Yeah right! You don't even know what this thing is!

Nuriko: SO?! You don't either!

Tasuki: Of course I do!  *whispers to Mrs. Ichigou* What is this thing?

Nuriko: *sweatdrop*

Chichiri: C'mon you guys, why don't we just have a nice time, no da!

Sano: NO! YOU WERE PUSHING FIRST!

Saitoh: I WAS NOT! Baka...

Mrs. Ichigou: ...*goes through the whole turning on the van process...*

Hotohori: Amazing...I've never seen anything like this...

Mrs. Ichigou: *chuckles* My, Hotohori...where have you been?! Ancient China or something?! *starts laughing*

Hotohori: *ahem* As a matter of fact, yes.

Mrs. Ichigou: x.x....*starting to get a little freaked out* Just...turn...on..the car.

---

*the next instructor-another young girl-steps out*

Duo: Okay! She has to be my instructor!

Heero: Baka.

*The girl (whose name shall be Shokora* ^-^) took out her little paper* I'll be taking...Kunou Tatewaki, Hibiki Ryouga, Mousse...

Ranma: Yeah! I'm not stuck with them!

Shokora: And..Saotome Ranma! ^-^ Please...follow me.

Ranma: NOOOOO!

Ryouga: Oh, so Ranma...you think your too good for us??

Mousse: *who doesn't have his glasses on* Yeah Saotome! *glares at Soujirou*

Kunou: Why must I be with these...these...

Soujirou: ...But I'm not...

*BONK*

Ranma: I'm over here Mousse!

Mousse: *puts on his glasses, with a lovely bump forming on his head*

Shokora: ....can we PLEASE get going??

Kunou: takes Shokora's hand and kisses it* Anything for my lovely--

Shokora: *hits him over the head with her clipboard* Get in the car.

Kunou: ...just like the Pig-tailed girl and Tendou Akane...oh! Which one shall I choose! Such lovely maidens *and he continues like this...*

Ranma: Let's just get this over with...

---

*Finally, after much discussion, Hotorhori began to drive, coming up to the freeway*

Mrs. Ichigou: So this is your first time driving? ^^

Hotohori: Yes.

Mrs. Ichigou: Oh! Don't forget to check the rear-view mirror!

Hotohori: *blink* Mirror? *sees himself* What a beautiful creature! I get more lovely everyday...*admires himself...holding up traffic...*

Nuriko: Not again...

Tasuki and Chichiri: *sweatdrop*

Sano: HEY! You took my belt thing!

Saitoh: I believe they are called 'seatbelts' ...*cough* besides, it's mine.

Sano: ...*grabs the seat belt* It's mine!

Saitoh: MINE! *tug*

Sano: MINE! *tug*

Tasuki: Don't they ever SHUT UP?!

Nuriko: I wouldn't be talking, ya flame-shooting bum!

Tasuki: Shut up!

Nuriko: P

Tasuki: P

*And the two senshis have a who can stick-their-tongue-out-the longest contest*

Chichiri: *sighs* I don't see why they all fight so much, no da.

- --

*Wufei and his instructor Shiina are stuck in traffic, due to our little Chinese emperor* (Unknown to Wufei at the time...)

Wufei: WEAKLINGS! GET MOVING! THE GREAT WUFEI IS DEMANDING!! *waves his katana in the air and starts honking the horn, which starts playing "Home on the Range"*

Shiina: ....o.o

Wufei: WHAT IS THIS?!

A burly motorcycle tattooed, bandana-wearing motorcycle guy who is in front of Wufei's *lovely* car steps off and starts walking to him*

Big motorcycle guy: You the little punk making all the noise..?

Wufei: Have you no honor?! Don't you know who you are talking too!? *is amazed someone would talk to him, Chang Wufei, like that!*

Shiina: *mumbles* I don't think he knows who he is talking too..

Wufei: ..And what is with these undignified tattoos?? *points* I say its time you listen to my justice speech weakling..I Chang Wufei --

*The big motorcycle guy walks away..not wanting to deal with this guy* Scary..

Wufei: HEY! YOU GET BACK HERE! Where's the justice..!?

*Quatre and Howard sit there, also stuck in traffic, listening to classical music..(Quatre insisted..x.x;;)*

Quatre: Hey that guy looks like Wufei..!!

Howard: yeah..whatever..*goes to sleep*

Quatre: I'm gonna go say hi! *hops out of the car in the middle of the freeway*

Wufei: Raberba..!?

Shiina: What the..?

Quatre: Hi Wufei! Isn't this a lovely day to go driving?? *smiles all sweet-like again*

Wufei: Not when weaklings are on the road! It be worse if Maxwell was here..*sticks his head out the window again* GET MOVING YOU SUNDAY DRIVERS!!! *honks his horn, forgetting the little song it played*

Quatre: WUFEI! We shouldn't be fighting! And..what was that??  *looks around, wondering where that song came from*

Wufei:  What injustice.....*hangs his head in shame of the car*

*Howard, waking up with a loud snore, notices Quatre's gone* Where'd that kid go?? *gets outta the car too*

Quatre: Wufei this is a very ugly car..

Wufei: ...-.-;;

Howard: QUATRE! Get back in the car! You might get run over!

Quatre: Okay okay..touchy..goodbye Wufei! Have fun driving! *waves, running back to his car*

Wufei: Even Raberba thinks this car is unhonorable! *slams his head against the steering wheel, accidently making "Home on the Range" start playing again*

---

An old lady walks out of the office..

The old lady: I'm going to be taking two people..*pushes up her glasses, looking at the clipboard* Okay..first..Himura Kenshin, and Trowa Barton?

The two bishounen step up.

Kenshin: I'm Himura Kenshin, de gozaru yo! ^-^

Trowa: *nods* Trowa Barton.

*The old lady looks at the two* My my..in my day..young men didn't wear their hair like that! After we go driving I'm takin' you youngins for a hair cut!

*Trowa and Kenshin exchange worried glances*

The old lady: Kenshin..you're up first! This is a stick-shift so it may be a little more difficult. *she gets in the front passenger seat of a tiny red Honda as Trowa stepped into the back, bumping his head*

Trowa: ....

*Kenshin sits there staring at all the..buttons and lights and stuff* There is nothing like this in the Meiji era! *pokes at the buttons*

The old lady: Um..why don't you turn on the car..?

Kenshin: *sits there* Oro..?

Old lady: Turn..on...the...car...hm?

Kenshin: *blink*

Old Lady: The car..*points to the keys already in the ignition* turn it on….

*Trowa just sits there..*

*Kenshin turns on the car, hearing the engine turn on* W-What's that!?

Old lady: It's just the engine sonny..

Kenshin: Oh..*sits there*

Old lady: Um..why don't you put your foot on the gas.

Kenshin: *looks at her all funny-like*

*The old lady points to the gas petal* It makes the car go..

Kenshin: *pushes his foot on it with a lotta force and they zoom out* Indeed it does! ^-^

Trowa: *gets a whiplash* ...x.x; ow..

---

Trunks: *drives along a very unbusy road* ..Sooo..umm..

Amai: NO TALKING! KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD!

Trunks: O-okay..*keeps his eyes glued to the road* Can't we at least turn on the radio?

Amai: NO TALKING!

Trunks: *turns back to the road, glaring at it and mumbling* I can fly..I don't know WHY I am taking these lessons..

Amai: WHAT DID YOU SAY!?

Trunks: uh..n-nothing ma'am..

---

A really old guy in a hat comes out..

Old guy: Hello *cough* My name is Bob.. I'll also be taking two people..lets see..*squints at the clipboard, obviously forgetting his glasses* Duo Maxwell..and Heero Yuy?

Duo: Yeah!! It's my turn!! Heheheheh..*rubs his hands together* C'mon Heero!

Heero: ..Omae o korosu! ;;

Old Bob: *walks over to a black convertible* Okay Duo..you're first up..

*Duo happily hopped in the front seat with the old guy as Heero sat down in the back*

Bob: I'm guessing you know how to turn on the car Duo?

Duo: Oh yeah sure! It cant be as hard as piloting a gundam..

Bob: Gundam? *blink*

*Duo turns on the ignition, and they zip off as Bob's hat flys off, * WHOO-HOO!!

Heero: BAKA! SLOW DOWN! *Duo's braid smacks Heero in the face*

Duo: *not listening to Heero* Hey this is fun! ^^ *turns on the radio as loud as he can*

Bob: You youngsters call this music!?

- --

Kenshin: *goes through a red light* I'm amazed on how fast this goes!

Old Lady: Kenshin! You went through a red light!

Kenshin: Oro??

Old lady: ..red light? It means stop!

Kenshin: Ohh..*stops the car in the middle of the street*

Old lady: Ack! Go go go!

Kenshin: But you just said--

*Trowa smacks his own forehead*

---

Quatre: Howard..why are all these people yelling (Wufei was yelling the most x_x) and sticking up their mean finger??

Howard: Their annoyed because of the traffic..

Quatre: But...they shouldn't be fighting at all! *sniff*

Howard: ..... *also wonders why traffic isn't moving...*

- --

Shiina: And then my husband left me! I mean..that was a total shock! And my poodle, Fufiee died!

Wufei: Poor poor weak onna..

Shiina: WHAT!?

Wufei: ...I said..er..injustice! *looks out the window, planning a way to get out before Shiina tells him more of her life-story*

---

Another guy steps out of the office, wearing a plaid jacket and dirty blue jeans..

The guy: Hi! I'm Herb and.. let's see..and I'm here to get..Vegeta and Son Gokou!

Vegeta: WHAT!? I'm not riding with Kakarotto!

Gokou: It'll be fun!

Herb: *smiles all happy-like* Okay you must be Vegeta and Gokou! Wow..how'd you two get your hair like that!

Vegeta: I'm the Saiya-jin prince Vegeta! No one questions my hair!

Herb: Er..sorry! Why don't we hit the road? ^^;

Vegeta: *blasts at the road, leaving a hole* There..I hit it.

Gokou: ^^; Um..I think he meant..to go driving..heh..

Vegeta: Shut up Kakarotto..

*So Herb nervously directs the two super saiya-jins over to a pine green Chevy SUV..*

Herb: Hop in Vegeta!

Vegeta: *raises an eyebrow and steps into the drivers seat while Gokou sat in between Herb and Vegeta*

Gokou: Wow..this is pretty cool!

Herb: Yep..the seats are genuine leather, and the dash board too!

Gokou: Really??

Vegeta: ....*could care less..* Can we go now??

Herb: And plus this baby has a built in air-conditioner all over! Along with a tv in the back!

Gokou: Wow...

Vegeta: *glares and starts the SUV up himself, zooming out of the parking lot..*

---

*Duo drove happily along the highway, the radio blasting, while Bob was sleeping (with all the noise..I dunno how..), and Heero was glaring since all the wind (plus Duo's braid) was hitting his face*

Heero: Duo..turn that thing down..

Duo: What did you say!?

Heero: I said turn that thing down!

Duo: WHAT!? I CAN'T HEAR YOU! THE RADIO IS TOO LOUD!

*Heero, getting annoyed, reaches and turns off the radio* I said turn down the radio!

Duo: OH! OK--*realizes he doesn't need to scream anymore* okay. x.x;;

*Bob wakes up* Wh-what's goin' on..?

*Heero also smacks his forehead, like Trowa earlier..*

---

*Ryouga is the first at the wheel*  Okay...let's see.....

Shokora: You know what you're doing, right Ryouga?? ^^

Ryouga:  Oh..yeah sure! *smiles nervously*

Ranma: ....sure he does...

Ryouga:  *turns on the car, and pushes the break*  Hmm...that's funny...the car is...not moving...

Shokora:  Put your foot on that petal...*points to the gas*

Ryouga: Oh! ^^ *pushes down on it, similar to what Kenshin did earlier*

*Ranma, Kunou, and Mousse all are pushed back against their seats, getting a whiplash*

Shokora:  I hope you all have your seatbelts on!

Mousse: *puts back on his glasses* That might be a good idea.

Ranma: *sighs and looks out the window*  I really don't want to die today...but with Ryouga driving...

Ryouga:  Shut up Ranma!

---

The old lady: Kenshin! You're driving on the sidewalk!

Trowa: o.o;

Kenshin: I-Is that a good thing..?

The old lady: No! Ack! Hurry get back on the road! Watch out for that fire hydrant!

*Kenshin turns the steering wheel quickly until they're back on the street* Phew..so how am I driving so far Ms.?? ^^

The old lady: ...

---

Sano: MINE! *tug*

Saitoh: MINE! *tug*

Nuriko: *turns around and faces Saitoh and Sano* WOULD YOU QUIT YELLING!

Tasuki: Hah! I won! You turned around!

Nuriko:  That's it. *starts choking Tasuki*

Tasuki: *grabs his iron tessen, while being choked*

Nuriko: Oh no you don't! *grabs it and throws it out the window*

Tasuki: *watches his precious tessen fly out into the wild blue yonder* O.O! AHHHHHHHH! Why the hell did you do that for?! My...my...*also starts choking Nuriko*

- And the two now have a ..choking contest..thing...-

Chichiri: *Sigh*I wish I was in a different car!

Hotohori: Very beautiful…

Mrs. Ichigou: Hotohori! GO! We probably got a million cars behind us! *looks out the side-view mirrors, worried*

Hotohori: *ish in his own lil world*

---

Wufei: *sticks his head out the window again* YOU WEAKLINGS!? WHAT'S THE HOLD UP??

Shiina: And then my little boy told me he got an 'F' in algebra and I was just...

Wufei: HURRRRRRY UP! I can't sit here with this onna any longer!  JUSTICE!

*A rather loud car pulls up right next to Wufei's 'beautiful' mustard color volkswagon bug, also getting stuck in the traffic*

Duo: Aw man! Why'd we hafta get stuck here!?

Heero: ...You're the one driving! *glare*

Duo: Well, how did I know there was some ...traffic jam or somethin'...?

*Wufei turns around ready to yell at the car next to him to turn down that radio* M-MAXWELL!? YUY?? Nooo..

Duo: Heeey Wu-man! *waves*

Wufei: *thinks to himself* Even Maxwell has a better car then me!

*Heero just sits there glaring*

---

Mirai Trunks: *keeps driving, glaring at the road* Can we at least turn on the air-conditioner??

Amai: SHUT UP AND KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD!

Mirai Trunks: *trying to hold in his anger* I am keeping my eyes on the road!

Amai: ARE YOU QUESTIONING MY AUTHORITY!?

Mirai Trunks: ....no ma'am........¬.¬;

---

*Kenshin continues driving, with two wheels on the curb and two on the street, making the car bounce heavily*

Trowa sits there, the motion sickness setting in..

Old lady: Kenshin! Get off the curb!

Kenshin: Oro?

Old lady: The curb! Your driving sideways!

Kenshin: Ohh..I thought everything tilted in a strange way..de gozaru yo! ^-^ *with the twitch of his wrist, he gets back on the road* I think I'm getting used to this now!

Old lady: *wipes the sweat off her forehead with a little handkerchief* Well..at least your back on the road..

Kenshin:  De goazru!

Trowa: ...........u.u must..go..to ...bathroom...*puke*

Old lady: Trowa, honey are you okay?

Trowa: ..yeah..*puke*

Old lady: My my my! Look at this mess! I wouldn't call that 'okay'. Whenever my grandchildrens get sick I give them this! *holds out a bottle* Now ...it may not look appetizing..and..I don't remember what's in it...but it works ! *stuffs a spoon into Trowa's mouth*

Trowa: *choke* *cough* *gag* *hack*

Old lady: See? Now aren't you all better now?

Trowa: ..*puke*

Kenshin: Oro?

- --

*Vegeta and the others sit at a red stoplight..*

Herb: And...this car is loaded with horsepower!

*Gokou looks at the guy blankly*

Vegeta: ..ugh..come on come on..what's with this?!

Herb: Yep..AND the wheels! Genuine leather! You can pop those things with a 12 foot needle and they still won't bust!

Gokou: N-needle??

Herb: Oh you hate needles too? Yeah..I remember goin' to the doctors office one time..man..that nurse just jammed the sucker in there! Oooweee! I was cryin' like a baby when I got home! My lil wife..she goes on sayin' "Oh Herb! You just don't know how to take those things like a man! Why..papa told me back in their day they had them needles as big as a barn they did!"

Gokou: *faints*

*Veggie-chan blasts the red light and goes..annoyed as ever*

*Herb not noticing Gokou fainted, keeps talking about needles..barns...and all that good stuff..*

Vegeta: *twich*

---

*The rest of the bishounen stand there, wating by the office as a plump little woman, about 50 or so steps out* Okay..lets see..I'm here for Vash the Stampede?*thinks for a second* Well that's an odd name..

*Vash steps up triumphantly to the lady* Yes! My turn!

The little plump lady: Oh you must be Vash! My name is Mrs. Carnway! Follow me please!

*Mrs. Carnway (I have no clue how I thought up that name..x.x;) walks over to a huge semi* Okay hop in! You're gettin' a crash course in semi-trucks!

Vash: ... But I thought I was gonna drive a car! A really *nice* car.. Not..this..thing..*stares at the huge truck in front of him..*

*Mrs. Carnway pushes him in* C'mon c'mon..I want to get this thing on the road!

Vash: Ow ..okay okay..be a little more gentle will ya?? *rubs his neck as he sits in the drivers seat* Um..how do I start this thing?

Mrs. Carnway: Just put the keys inside the ignition..

*Vash jams the key inside the ignitiron, and slams his foot on the petal* ahahahaha! yeaaaah! *starts honking the horn* Hey this is better than I thought! *honks the horn again*

Mrs. Carnway: Stop that!

---

*Heero sits frustrated in the back of the convertible, typing away his ever-so present laptop* Hn..

Duo: *turns around and leans over the front seat*  Hey Heero..you got any games on that thing or something?? I'm bored...

Heero: No. *click, click*

*All of a sudden Quatre comes running in between the cars..again* Hey guys! ^_^

*A faint voice of Howard yelling to Quatre to get back in the car is heard in the distance* x_x..

Duo: Quatre? O.o;

Quatre: I thought I heard you guys pull up! Hey I like your car Duo! It's nicer than Wufei's..*blink*

Wufei: Err....

Duo: *just wanting to annoy Wufei* Heh..yeah..and Wufei sitting in there doesn't make it any better looking....

Wufei: *his face turns beet-red as he tries to hold in his anger*

Quatre: I told him it would be nice to add somemore cup holders in that..and maybe paint it a nicer color..get a new horn...or just get rid of it and get another one..*goes on about car tips..*

 Wufei: AHHH! THIS IS NOT EVEN MY CAR YOU WEAKLINGS! *jumps out of the car and starts banging it with a katana* Weak car! *bang* No dignity! *bang*

Shiina: Mr. Chang! You stop that right now! That's a 200 dollar fine!

Wufei: *bang* ..o.o;

---

Vash: *speeds down the highway in the big ole semi..honking that wonderful horn over..and over...and over..*

Hey can we stop for some donuts later?!

Mrs. Carnway: *holds onto her seat for dear life* IF YOU DON'T STOP HONKING THAT HORN WE AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE!

Vash: *gulp* Soo..that means..no donuts?

---

*Kenshin, Trowa, and the old granny also get stuck on the freeway*

Kenshin: There are a lot of these "cars" here..*blink*

Trowa: It's called a freeway..there must be some sort of traffic jam or something..

Granny: So Trowa, my boy..how are you feeling??

Trowa: I--

Granny: *stuffs some more of that 'medicine' into Trowa's mouth* No need to say anything! Just take somemore of this..

Trowa: ...*twich*

Granny: Need anymo--

Trowa: *takes the bottle and starts to chug the stuff down*

Kenshin: O.o;; Uh..Trowa? I don't think you should drink anymore, de gozaruuu..

Trowa: *chug chug chug*

Kenshin: Um..M-mrs? What exactly is in there?

Granny: Why..it's been so long ago that I don't remember!

Trowa: *chug chug chug..etc..-_-;*

Kenshin: *sniffs the bottle a little* T..this is...SAKE! O.O!

Trowa: *hiccup* Hehehehehehheeeeee.....ooOooOooooo....h-heeeey Kenshin....waannaaa know somthing? *hiccup*

Kenshin: *blink*

Trowa: hbabballblighieeeigabii! HAHAHAAAA! *slaps his knee all drunkedly and keeps drinking*

Kenshin: Oro..

Granny: OH! Now I remember! I must've switched the two bottles around! *starts laughing* My my my..

Trowa: *hic* And then I told Heavyarms ..*hic* heh..heh..hehehe..*waves his finger around* HEAVYARMS! Now..why did yaaa have to..*hic* run out of those bullets *hic* for?!

---

Herb: And you know what that raccoon did?! It went right up and bit my nose!

*Gokou..who now recovered from his faint sat there and listened to Herb talk about all his wacky..wood..adventures..(x.x;)

Gokou: Ouch..soo..what did you do? ^^;;

Vegeta: Ugh...

Herb: I killed that dang varmint I did! Then of course I took it home for the lil misses to cook....she always told me how her pop would bring home those raccoons for supper! So I said..'Darlene! I'll go get ya one them varmints..and we'll have a great feast!"

Gokou: Ya know..I'm hungry! Hey Vegeta..why don't we stop somewhere??

Vegeta: *mumble* Kakarotto no baka...

---

Amai:WHAT DID I SAY!? KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD! LOOK IN THE REAR-VIEW MIRROR! DON'T FORGET THE TURN SIGNALS!

Trunks: ....

Amai: HEY! I'm talking! I expect you to listen Trunks!

Trunks: That's it... *stops the car (rather quickly..o.o) and hops out* I can't take any more of this..if you want to drive..fine. *walks away, all angry-like*

Amai: Come back here! We haven't gone over the traffic signals yet!!! HEEEEY!

Trunks: *happily hears her voice fading away*

Now since Trunks was kinda mad...he kinda forgot he could fly..so the purple-haired saiya-jin wandered around the woods, until he came to another road..*

---

A little grey-blueish Jeep Wrangler speeds down the highway...

Amy: *leans her head back on the seat* I didn't know it took this long to go the mall..

Bry: Who was the one who said 'Take this road! We'll be there in no time!' ?

Amy: Sorry 'bout that.. ^^;;

*Amy leaned over the side of the jeep, yawning, but she spotted something in the distance...*

Amy: ..B-Bry-chan?

Bry: Not now...I need to look to see where we get off...

Amy:  Forget about that now!  I see somethin'.

*A very bored Trunks sits by the side of the road..all...um...bored-like*

Bry: Tell me about it when we get to the mall...

Amy: But it'll be too late by then!  *squints* That looks like...no...he's not even real.

Bry: Amy-chan, what are you talking about? *keeps her eyes straight on the road (like the good lil driver she is...*cough*)

Amy: T...T..Tr

Bry: Amy are you okay?  I mean...you're acting kinda weird...weirder than normal.

Amy: *ingores Bry's last comment* Tr...Trun.. *points*

Bry: *looks to where she is pointing too* TRUNKS!  *Stops her jeep right in front of him*

Amy: ...it looks like him...but...

Bry: *glomps the unsuspecting bishie* I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!  IT IS TRUNKS! I DUNNO HOW YOU CAN BE LIKE REAL AND ALL...BUT WHO CARES?! IT'S TRUNKS!

Amy: *sits there, very confused*  ...what?

Trunks: *forces a smile, even though his oxygen is throughly leaving him* Uh...I never knew I had fans...^^;;

Bry: I love Trunks!  *starry eyes*  Hey Trunks, you can come with us!  We, meaning my best friend-Mirai chibi Amy-chan aka-Duet-chan, that's what I call her- and me are gonna go to the mall!

Trunks: O-okay...

Bry: Great! ^^ You can sit in between us in the front!

Amy: ....*still sits there, confuzzled as ever* Whaa..?

*Trunks squeezes in between the two girls* 

Bry: *happily starts driving again*  This has to be a dream or something! Wow..it's..it's Trunks! ^_^!

*Amy finally snaps out of it, poking Trunks to see if he is real* 

Trunks: *blinks*

Amy: Whoa...so you ARE Trunks!  Can I have your autograph?! n_n!

Bry: *sweatdrop* Amy-chan....Trunks is a hot, fighting bishounen, he doesn't sign autographs 'sides, he's my --

Trunks: Okay! ^^  I never thought people knew about me.. *happily signs his name*

Amy: Thanks!

Bry:  *glare*

- - -

Trowa: *jumps out of the car through the open window, sluggishly walking inbetween the cars* Heheheheh...don't mind meeeeeeee!  *bangs on people's windows with the sake bottle*

Kenshin: Trowa!  ..m-maybe I should go get him...

Granny: Oh no, Himura-dear! This is too funny to watch!  Why...I haven't had such entertainment since....well...this old woman can't remember! ^^ Where'd you youngins say you came from?

Kenshin: Orooororoo....

---

Duo:  *is now sound asleep, his feet up on the dashboard, and his arms comfortably behind his head*

Heero: ...*types*

Quatre: You know the best kind of tea is...well...I don't know!  I mean...I've tried so many..

Wufei: Won't this torture ever END?!  *leans against his car*  Well...at least Maxwell is asleep..so it's a little quieter...

Duo: *snore*

Heero: Even when he's sleeping his loud....baka.

Wufei: I take that back. 

---

Amy: *hears a noise* W-what's that?  *looks up to the sky, seeing something coming down*

Bry:  I dunno...

Trunks: *looks up too..* That looks like...

*the item lands in the back seat, with a lovely bang*

Bry: AHH! MY CAR!  *sniff* Oo..I hope it didn't hurt Natakuuu...

Amy: *lunges over the front seat, picking up the thing*  It's...a.......a fan?

Trunks: *sighs and mumbles* Great..I wonder...Nuriko probably got mad at Tasuki...

Bry: Did you say something Trunks?

Trunks: Um..nope!  ^^;;

Amy: It's an..iron..tess...tessen...Tasuki?!  It look likes Tasuki's ...iron..tessen!

Bry: WHAT?!  Tasuki?!

Trunks: *looks at the two girls, surprised* You two KNOW Tasuki?

Amy: If Tasuki is here, then that means others from Fushigi Yuugi...like Chichiri...Hotohori...Nuriko..or…..! ^^

Bry: And...maybe even more bishounen! 

Amy: *her eyes turn into little hearts* Like Duo! Maybe Kenshin..or Rooster-head! Or...*goes on and on*

Trunks: *is now the one who is confused*

---

Hotohori:  *keeps staring at himself in all off the mirrors, smiling*

Sano: ....*plugs his ears*  I'm not listening to youuuu...

Saitoh: You act like a child!  Moron..

Sano: SHUT UP!

Saitoh: I thought you said you weren't listening to me. *smirk*

Chichiri:  We really should start going, no da!  People seem to be getting angry..

Nuriko: *looks up from choking Tasuki* Hey you're right...but where is that one lady?

Tasuki: *who is also choking Nuriko* Didn't she run out of the car screaming...and mumbled something about a nervous breakdown?

Nuriko: Shut up, fang-boy! *choke*

Tasuki: You were the one who threw my tessen out the window! *choke*

---

*Duo and the old driver instructor both are snoring rather loudly*

Heero: *winces, trying to type*

Wufei: And then...bam!  I hit that weakling--

Trowa: *walks up, staggering* HEEEEY!  It's....it's Wufei..*twich*...bahahhhaaaaaa...WHAT'S UP MAAAAN! *slaps Wufei's hand* 

Wufei: WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS BARTON?!

Quatre: Is...that Trowa??

Trowa: *mimics Quatre* Is that Trowa?  HAH! Of course it's Trowa...*slaps his own knee* Trowa....hahahaaaa! Who ever thought of THAT name?!  *giggles all scary-like*

Quatre: I thought you liked the name Trowa....*blink*

Heero: ...*looks up, wondering who is making all the noise, since Duo is asleep*  Trowa?

Trowa: Ehh...it's Heero!  *twich* Blow anything up yet?!  *laughs like a maniac*

Quatre: T..Trowa, what's wrong with you?? 

Wufei: ...he must be intoxicated or something..o.O

Quatre: Oh Trowa!  I am ashamed...I never knew that you drink!  Now....all my friends are just ..crazy....*sniff*

Wufei: ...what??

Trowa: Hey...Heero...I wanna tell ya a seeecret..

Heero: ...mission accepted.

Trowa: *whispers* hgabbliitriekkfdiitom! HAHAHAHAHHA!

Heero: .......ow.  *hits his ears to see if he can hear*

Trowa: Haa...second person I did that to! D

Duo: *snores*

Trowa: *looks over to the kawaii-sleeping-Duo*  Heh...look...it's Duo....

Wufei: ...of course it's Maxwell..its not like you have never seen him before...-.-;

Trowa: *wanders right up to Duo, and looks at him*

Duo: *his kawaii nose twitches for a second, as he mumbles something*

Trowa: ...*pokes his face*

Duo: *snore*

Trowa: *poke*

Duo: *swats his hand away*

Trowa: *giggles insanely, poking his mouth, making Duo have all these funny faces*

Quatre: .....

Heero: .....*scoots to the other side of the car...even he's freaked out by Trowa at the moment*

Duo: *opens his eyes slowly, letting out a long yawn*

Trowa: Boo.

Duo: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! 

Wufei: HAHA! MAXWELL!  You weakling.....

Duo: *clutches his chest, to make sure his heart is still beating*  ..o.o; Good...

Trowa: HAHAHAHAHAHA!  Duo Duo Duo.....*chugs down somemore sake* *twich*

Duo: Trowa? *blinks*  Hey guys, what's up with him?

Heero: He has discovered sake...that's what.

Quatre: Trowa! Aren't you under age or something?  *is all worried, not to mention scared*

Trowa: Hey Duo....I wanna tell ya a secret.

Duo: Okay! ^^ 

Trowa: *whispers* hagfhbpefjjvfodgyrlyotrieeeee!  HAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Duo: Wait...I didn't catch it. x.o; 

Heero: *bangs his head against the seat Bob is sitting on*

Bob: *wakes up quickly, thinking it's an earthquake* AHHHHHHH!  *runs out of the car.......*

Quatre: Okay...that was loud...

Trowa: *starts yelling*

Duo: *turns the radio even louder so he doesn't have to hear Trowa screaming*  Man....

Quatre: There's no earthquake....

Heero: .....DUO TURN THAT THING DOWN!

Wufei: ALL YOU WEAKLINGS SHUT UP!   THERE IS NO EARTHQUAKE....and MAXWELL...TURN THAT OFF!

Heero: *twiches*

Duo: *pouts and turns it down a little* Fine...I'm going back to sleep though...

Quatre: How can he sleep though all this? 

Trowa: *who finished yelling, pushes his nose against someone's window, looking in* HEeeeeelLlooooOooooooo...

*the two old ladies in the car begin to scream....*

Heero: Omae o korosuuuu.....

---

*Now, Bry, Trunks, and Amy get stuck in traffic too, slowly inching to where some of the other bishounen are*

Amy: So...you think there will be some more?!

Bry: I hope so! ^^

Trunks: ....Oh yeah...they're probably around here somewhere...*sweatdrop*

Amy and Bry: REALLY?!

Trunks: *who can't hear for a minute* Yeah.....

*The little jeep inches up somemore..*

---

Ranma: Turn right, ya moron!

Ryouga:  AH! Shut up Ranma!  I know what I'm doing!

Shokora: .......

Ranma: ...I still think I should be the one driving..

Mousse: *looks to Kunou* What makes you think you can drive better than us Saotome?!

Ranma: Mousse..put on your glasses..idiot.

Kunou: HOW DARE YOU COMPARE ME WITH ...SAOTOME!

Ranma:  WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN?!

Kunou: *closes his eyes* Well...I...the Blue Thunder of Fuurinkan High am much more handsome...and better suited for Tendou Akane.

Ranma: Shut up!  (Uh-oh...we're being to sound a lil like Sano, now aren't we?? ^^)

Shokora: Um...Ryouga, where are we?

Ryouga: ....we're...um....

Mousse: Lost.

Ranma: Oh great...now I'm lost with all you morons! -.-;

Ryouga: *turns onto another road, hitting the freeway* HAHAHA! HEY! Loook! We're not LOST!

Ranma: Oh great...we're on a freeway...but we still don't know where we are!

-yells can be heard from the van in front of them-

Shokora: *peeks out the window* Hey...isn't that some of those guys who left before you? But..where is Mrs. Ichigou?

Ranma: Hey it is!  Well...Ryouga, buddy, I guess I owe it to ya this time.

Ryouga: *blink*

---

*The jeep...or...'Nataku' pulls up behind a certain ugly volkswagon bug*

Bry: Well..there's an ugly car.

Amy: Ick...it needs a different color or something!

Trunks: ....*thinks to himself* No..that looks like the car Wufei drove off in....o.o; Nooo! I can't be stuck in traffic with him....or any of the other gundam pilots..get those five together....*shudders*

Bry: Is...something wrong Trunks-chan?

Trunks: No! No...*laughs awkwardly* Why would anything be wrong for?

Bry: You just shuddered a second ago.

Amy: *blink*

WEAKLING!

*snore*

*hic* ooOOOoooooo...heheheee...*hic hic*

Trowa...maybe you shouldn't drink anymore!  How about some tea instead?

IF EVERYONE DOESN'T SHUT UP RIGHT NOW I SWEAR I'LL--

Amy: .....B-Bry...did you hear that?

Bry: ...I...I think so...

*The two hop out of the car, peeking from behind the mustered colored volkswagon bug in front of them*

Trunks: Here we go....*sits back to see what happens*

*two loud squeals of glee are heard* ...

Quatre: *jumps about a mile high* What was that?!

Wufei: It sounds like some crazy onnas or someth----

*GLOMP*

WU-CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

Wufei: *Looks down to see a girl, about his age or some smiling up at him*  WHA?!

Amy: Wow..I never thought....that....you were like..REAL! I mean...*huggles* Hey where's Duo??

Wufei: *shocked* M-Mawell? He's...uh...*point*

Bry: *hops right next to Heero* HIYA! My name is Bry...and....you are like my fav. bishounen from Gundam Wing and and...*talks about a mile a minute*

Heero: Nani? o.o;;

Trowa: *drinks somemore sake* .....ooo..this stuff really*hic* makes you see things..*hic*

Amy: *hops into the car, right next to Duo* Awwwwwww! Isn't that kawaii?! He's sleeping...^^

Bry: And like..I was wondering..*proceeds to talk*

Amy: *pokes Duo in the side* Duuuuuuuuuooooooo...o.o

Duo: *snore*

Amy: DUO!

Duo: *wakes up quickly* WHAT WHAT?! 

Amy: *starry eyes* Wow..

Duo: *turns around and sees he girl staring at him with a dreamy look in her eyes* Wh-who..

Amy: *huggles him tightly* WOW! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR LIKE...REAL!  You'relikemyfavoritebishounenandIthinkyourreallykawaiiandsweetandthebestestgundampilotandyou're

braidissoooooooadorable...and I like looooove yooou! *huggles*

Duo: *is presently losing oxygen, as poor Trunks did earlier*

Quatre: *blink* Where'd they come from??

Trowa: *hic*

Wufei: ONNAS! ;

Heero: ....*just stares at the red-haired girl* ...

Bry: Oh oh oh! Could you do your famous glare for me???  *smiles all sweetly*

Heero: *blink* M-mission accepted.   *does..the..OFFICIAL 'Heero-Yuy-Glare-Of-Death'(c)2000*

Bry: YATTA!

Amy: *lets go of Duo for a second* Don't ya just wish ya had a camera? ^_^

*Duo catches his breath for a minute* 

Bry: Hey Amy-chan....pinch me to see if this isn't some great dream or something..

Amy: Okie. *pinches Bry in the face*

Bry: OW! Hey not that hard!

Amy: Sorry! ^^; Wait wait! Pinch me now...

Bry: *pinches her friend in the face too*

Amy: HEEY!  *rubs her cheek*  You didn't have to do it so hard..

Bry: Well you did it first. P

Amy: I didn't mean too! P

Bry: Did too!

Amy: Did not!

Bry: Too!

Amy: Not!

Bry: Too too too!

Amy: Not not not!

*The gundam pilots just stare at them....well...except Trowa who finally passed out*

Quatre: C'mon girls, let's not fight..! ^^;

Amy: *squeals* AWW! It's...QUATRE!  Kawaiiness!

Quatre: o.o; *hides behind Wufei*

Wufei: ; Raberba...

Bry: *Looks down* Hey...what happened to Trowa?

Wufei: *gives a little smirk* The weakling drank to much sake..

Amy: *blink*

*all of a sudden Kenshin comes running in between the cars, looking for Trowa*   Trowa!  Where are you, de goazrrrruuuuu??

Bry: Hey Amy...that sounded like Kenshin...

Amy: ....it did, huh??

Duo: I wonder what Kenshin wants...

*But....before Kenshin could make it to the others, the two fangirls attacked*

KEEEENSHIIIIIIIIIIN!

Kenshin: ORO?!

Amy: Aww! He said 'oro'!

Bry: Hey is Sano around??

Kenshin: *just kinda stands there...confused like so many others have been today*

Amy: Aww! Isn't he just so kawaii??

Bry: Yeah! ^^

Amy: Oh! We almost forgot...  *runs to the jeep and gets Tasuki's iron tessen* This like...fell into Bry's car...

Heero: Isn't that....what's his name?

Bry: Tasuki!

Heero: *glare* Sorry.

Bry: *glares back*

Amy: Okay...it's freaky when BOTH of them glare.

Duo: Yeah....

Kenshin:  I wonder why Tasuki's tessen is here...I thought he went into that thing with Saitoh (a little squeal from Amy can be heard), Sano (there's a squeal from Bry), Chichiri, Nuriko and Hotohori (the girls are now constantly squealing..).

*A certain huge semi-truck pulls right behind the now larger group*

-Vash hops out-

Vash: Hey guys! ^^  Wow...I didn't know driving those big things could be so fun!  Plus..I got some donuts...anybody want...*trails off*  Who are those two? 

Amy: VAASSSSHHHH!  *glomp* 

Vash: Why hello there! ^^

Bry: Amy-chan....*pulls her off* Let's go find Tasuki and give this back to him!! n_n

Amy:  Okay! *turns around and waves to the guys* Be back sooon! ^_^

Duo: See ya! *waves and does his kawaii-grin*

Wufei: MAXWELL! *bonk*

---but before the two girls leave the G-boys, Trunks and Kenshin...Sano comes running, Saitoh chasing after him with a sword---

Sano: OKAY OKAY OKAY! I'm sorry....geez...

Bry: SANOOOOO! *glomps him as he runs by*

Sano: *blink* 

Nuriko: Well....I STILL say I should drive...you are too immature and---

Tasuki: WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?!  You threw my iron tessen out the WINDOW!

Bry: *pokes Tasuki in the back with the fan* Here!

Tasuki: *turns around to see the red-headed girl with his tessen* You found it!!! *is all happy again*

Nuriko: WHAT?!

Amy: Well...I actually saw it first. ¬.¬...

Bry: Yeah...yeah I found it! *hands it to Tasuki, ignoring her friend*

Ryouga: Where are we?

Ranma: Idiot...

Amy: Wow...so many bishounen are all showing up....o.o...this is weird.

Bry: Oh well. ^_^

Kenshin: Now Sano...maybe you should apologize to Saitoh...

Sano: What?! No way.

Saitoh: See...Himura gets it...the Rooster doesn't though.

Sano: Take that back!

Saitoh: Why should I, moron!

Gourry: Well...we got into a little accident...but everything was okay! ^^

Zelgadis: I am never riding in a car with you ever again.

Shougo:  I still say my montage was better than that car....

Matsumoto: Yamadera you scare me sometimes...^^;;

Quatre: *blinks* Was everyone stuck on the freeway too?

Duo: I dunno...guess so! ^^  Oh well...*blasts the radio even louder*

*the two old ladies in the car (the ones Trowa freaked out) stare out the windows, looking at the rather large group that suddenly gathered together on the jammed freeway*

Edna...is there some party going on?? 

I don't know Agnes....

Tamahome: ....it was horrible driving in a car with him... *directs his thumb to Nakago*

Nakago: Shut up...like you could do any better...

Nuriko: Well it couldn't have been as bad with Tasuki over there..

Tasuki: *huggles his tessen* I thought you were gone for good....u.u

Chiriko: ....*blink* I never seen Tasuki act like that before...

Chichiri: It's scary, no da!

Shiina (who hasn't spoken for awhile o.o;;) Weren't most of these guys at the DMV? o.O;;

Wufei: ........weaklings.

Heero: I'm surrounded by bakas....LOTS of bakas....*glares at Duo* Well...Duo is just being..Duo......*then he glares at Vash who is chowing down on donuts* Okay......*then he glares at the fainted Trowa, who is not fainted anymore but is like...dancing ..or whatever you would call that* Next time he even goes near a bottle of sake I swear I'll kill him....*Next, Heero glares at all the people in the surrounding cars who aren't doing anything but just staring at the group* Probably scared....mm...I would be too...

Hiko: Well....I thought I did pretty well in this thing....I bet I did better than the baka deshi over there!

Kenshin: -.-....at least I don't have some dent in my car..

Hiko: ....*glares* I didn't do that...

Kusenagi: So...you weren't the one who hit the brick wall?  *smirk*

Hiko: Shut up....he doesn't need to know that.

Kenshin: *smiles all smug-like*

Tenchi: Well...I thought it was kinda fun....even though Kain's cape kept getting stuck in the door..

Mamoru: You wore you're cape inside the car? O.o

Kain: Hey...I got fond of that cape....

Trunks: Hey...where's my dad and Gokou?

Goten (GT):  I dunno.....didn't they leave after you?

---

*Gokou sits at a resturant, pigging out on everything* I didn't know that driving lessons were this fun! ^^

Herb: Ya know what....ya saiya-jins are allright!

Vegeta:  *sits there, with his arms crossed over his chest and glaring*

---

Bry: ...*stands there kinda in a daze* Amy.....you're positive this isn't a dream? 

-silence-

Amy?  *blinks and looks around*

Amy: *ish all talking with Duo, Vash, Wufei and Kenshin*  

Bry: *sweatdrop* She's hopeless..... and to think...this all started on the way to the mall....*blinks*

~* And Hotohori is still admiring himself.... *~