Another one of my xovers with Final Fantasy VII and Sweeney Todd. This is probably my last one for a while now too. This one is based on the scene "Little Priest" in Sweeney Todd and I have to say I found this very fun to write! I changed the different persons in the original song to jobs in the Final Fantasy series, a list of them can be found in the end of the fic.
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy or Sweeney Todd.
Little Turk
After being defeated in the last battle by Cloud, who now was considered a hero, Sephiroth was back in Genesis' café, a glass of Banora ale in hand. He was pretty angry at the moment; he thought the power of Jenova would have guaranteed world domination, but he had failed, or the power of Jenova had failed him.
During all his time trying to take over the world, Genesis had stayed in this café doing what he started years ago. Not that business went better now.
"So the only one you succeeded to kill was a flower girl?"
Genesis was chuckling next to his friend, earning an angry look from the other.
"Not only that, but you brought her here too? It's a trophy of failure, my friend. What are you going to do with that?"
Sephiroth took a sip of his ale and then studied what was left in the glass. What am I going to do with it? Sephiroth wasn't sure himself.
"I can go and drop her in a lake or something."
"Oh yeah, we could do that."
Genesis rise from his seat walking to one of the windows and push the curtain to the side to look at everyone passing. People didn't remember either him, Sephiroth or any other great SOLDIER anymore.
"I don't suppose she's got anyone going to come poking around looking for her since you killed her in front of everyone..."
Then an idea hit him. Smirking he tilted his head a bit wondering what Sephiroth would think about his idea. Genesis slowly started to sing then.
"Seems a downright shame..."
"Shame?"
Sephiroth didn't even look up at his friend as he continued singing.
"Seems an awful waste
Such a nice plump frame"
Slowly Genesis turned around walking toward his desk in the back of the café.
"Wot's her name has-
Had-
Has!
Nor it can't be traced."
Sephiroth, still not really caring what Genesis had in his mind at the moment, drank the last of his drink and then continued looking at the now empty glass.
"Bus'ness needs a lift,
Debts to be erased
Think of it as thrift,
As a gift...
If you get my drift..."
At his desk, Genesis turns his head toward his friend for a moment.
"Seems an awful waste"
Turning back to his desk he takes the ladle in a bowl of disgusting minced meat and lifts it up only to drop it back down.
"I mean, with the price of meat, what it is
When you get it-
If you get it..."
"Ah!"
Sephiroth look up at his friend when he understands what Genesis was thinking.
"Good you got it!"
Genesis turns around quickly and starts to walk back and forth, now singing a bit faster than before.
"Take, for instance, SOLDIER Rhapsodos and his pie shop,
Bus'ness never better, using only pussycats and toast,
Now a pussy's good for maybe six or seven at the most,
And I'm sure they can't compare – as far as taste."
Sephiroth start to sing as well with his friend now.
"Genesis!
What a charming notion!"
Rising from his seat, Sephiroth walks up to his friend and sing after Genesis.
"Well, it does seem a waste!"
"Eminently practical and yet appropriate as always,
Genesis
How I did without you all these years I'll never know!"
Sephiroth grab Genesis by his hands and they now dance with each other while they sing between each other's lines.
"How delectable!"
"Think about it!"
"Also undetectable!"
"Lots of other people will-"
Spinning around in their dance, they smile to each other with as much insanity as their idea is. Both of them having an evil glint in their eyes.
"How choice!"
"-Soon be fallin' victim, won't they?"
"How rare!"
"Think of all them pies!"
Letting go of each other Sephiroth walks over to the window Genesis was by before. He continues to sing as he watches the people outside pass.
"For what's the sound of the world out there?"
Genesis walks up next to his friend leaning on the window sill also watching the people outside now.
"What, Sephiroth?
What, Sephiroth?
What is that sound?"
Sephiroth leans closer to the window to get a better view of everyone outside.
"Those crunching noises pervading the air"
"Yes, Sephiroth!
Yes, Sephiroth!
Yes, all around!"
"It's man devouring man, my friend-"
Straightening from their leaning positions they sing the next line together.
"And who are we to deny it in here?"
Genesis turns to walk to his desk as they take a break in their singing.
"These are desperate times, Genesis, and desperate measures are called for."
This could be something fun… Sephiroth think as he walks after Genesis to his desk as his friend takes out a finished pie from the old oven and places it on the desk in front of Sephiroth.
"Here we are, hot out of the oven."
Looking suspiciously at the pie in front of him, Sephiroth remember the taste of those pies.
"What is that?"
"It's Turk,"
Genesis leans on his desk looking out a window were you can see a Turk standing by an alley like he's waiting for someone. On the next line he start to sing again and Sephiroth too.
"Have a little Turk."
"Is it really good?"
Sephiroth walks over to the window to look as well. Genesis follows close behind.
"My friend, it's too good at least!
Then again, they keep their body in form
So it's pretty fresh."
Sephiroth look doubtingly at the Turk across the street.
"Is there any fat?"
"Only where it sat."
"Haven't you got poet
Or something like that?"
Nodding toward a man leaning against a wall reading a book, Sephiroth earns an angry look from his friend. Messing with you is always enjoyable…
"What was that?
I'll not put myself on your killing list!"
Genesis' angry singing tone made Sephiroth smirk and he chuckled as he glanced at his friend's angry face.
"Try the Turk!"
Genesis nods toward the Turk that now start to walk down the street. Watching him leave they walk across the café to another window and study the people they can see.
"Gambler's rather nice."
Comments Genesis as a man walks past outside playing with a pair of dices in his hand.
"If it's for a price"
Sephiroth looks around for anyone interesting as his friend continues.
"Order something else, though, to follow
Since no one should swallow it twice!"
"Anything that's lean?"
"Well, then, if you're an adventuring Soldier
You might enjoy sneaking Ninja!"
They watch a Ninja in foreign clothes sneak around in the middle of a crowd.
"Anyway, it's clean
Though of course, it tastes of wherever it's been!"
"Is that Fencer
On the fence there?"
Sephiroth turns his gaze to a man sitting on a metal fence blocking the way into a small alley. Genesis turns his attention to the person as well.
"Mercy no, my friend
Look closer-
You'll notice it's retired SOLDIER!"
"Doesn't look so strong,
More like ShinRa Warrior."
"No, it has to be SOLDIER- it's green."
Tilting his head to the side a bit, Sephiroth could very well imagine all the mako making their flesh change color. He puts a hand on his friends shoulder to turn around with him and they walk away from the window.
"The history of the world, my poet-"
"Save a lot of graves
Do a lot of relatives favours."
"-Is those in here serving those out there."
Stopping at a window still with the curtain over it Genesis and Sephiroth turns toward each other.
"You hunt ev'rybody
So there should be plenty of flavours…"
"How gratifying for once to know-"
With mischievous smiles they sing together.
"That those out there will serve those in here!"
Pushing away the curtain, Genesis leans on the window sill, Sephiroth doing the same. A person clad in green and white dress like clothes catches Sephiroth's eye.
"What is that?"
"It's Bishop
Finest in the shop"
Genesis walks back behind his desk.
"Or we have some Animist's pie peppered
With actual Dragoon on top."
Picking up some kind of spice with his fingers, Genesis drops it in the air and look at Sephiroth with an amused expression on his face.
"And I've just begun-"
Genesis hands a pie to Sephiroth with a mischievous smile.
"'Ere's a Chemist- so oily
It's served with a doily-
'Ave one?"
Sephiroth look a bit disgusted at the pie as the minced meat in it drips out of it. Putting it down, he walks to the other end of the desk.
"Put it on a bun
Well, you never know if it's going to run!"
At the end of the desk lies Genesis sword and Sephiroth picks it up and walk to the end of the desk where Genesis's singing.
"Try the Fighter
Fried, it's drier!"
Genesis look as Sephiroth examines his sword and sings.
"No, the Gunner is really
Too coarse and too mealy"
Walking around the desk Genesis stands next to his friend to sing the next lines.
"Then Monk-
It's compacter!"
"Ah, but always arrives overdone."
Sephiroth holds Genesis' sword close to his friend's neck and takes a short break from the singing, thinking on one specific person.
"I'll come again when you have Hero on the menu."
With a mischievous smirk, Genesis takes Sephiroth's Masamune from his waist, now too holding it against the other's neck. They once again start to dance around in circles in the little café with their swords at each other's necks, smiling evil smiles.
"Have charity towards the world, my poet"
"Yes, yes, I know, general!"
"We'll take whoever that we can get."
"High-born and low, general!"
"We'll not discriminate great from small!"
They walk together side by side to the window and watch the still passing people outside almost chuckling at their insane idea.
"No, we'll serve anyone-
Meaning anyone-"
"We'll serve anyone-"
And then they sing the last lines of the song together.
"And to anyone-
At all!"
I tried to use the jobs the characters in FFVII has and then some random jobs that would fit with the lines. Here are the different jobs I used in this fic:
Turk – I found them fitting as a title and it was the first thing I had in mind when I was inspired to write this
Gambler – this is the job Cait Sith has (I know it's a robot, but Reeve is the one controlling it! Kind of)
Ninja – of course it is Yuffie's job
Fencer – it's a job where the user uses rapiers
SOLDIER – seriously, with all the mako would it be a surprise if their flesh was green?
ShinRa Warrior – what I first wanted was to have ShinRa Infantryman or only Infantryman, but it would be too long
Poet – in the original song Sweeney sing poet and I kept it (even if it's not a job) because it would be fun since Genesis is a poet
Bishop – it's a mix between White mage and Elementalist and was mainly put there because it did fit very well and since it's a type of White mage, it would work as Aerith's job
Animist – I think this job only exist in FF Tactics, they copy attacks from monsters they fight
Dragoon – when the user uses lances and/or spears, Cid's job
Chemist – they are the ones that can use special items in FF games, I could imagine Hojo being a Chemist as job…
Fighter – isn't it a pretty basic job in the whole FF series?
Gunner – Vincent's and Barret's job
Monk – I got surprised when I found out that Tifa's job was called Monk…
Hero – is not a job, but Cloud really is one!