Summary: The Line of Durin is ended.
Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield.
Trigger Warnings Miscarriage.
Slash, Mpreg.
Also Medical inaccuracies.
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Bilbo cried until he had no more tears to cry and then he begged Gandalf to take him back to Bag-End, Thorin was gone and with him Fili and Kili.
The heaviness within him was ignored as they travelled and Bilbo felt new tears fill his eyes with the coming of each new day and could give himself no reason to hold them back and Gandalf couldn't look at him without guilt in his eyes.
Bilbo declined staying at Beorn's and Gandalf allowed it. Bilbo just wanted to get back to Shire, so much so that he hardly noticed his lack of appitite, blaming it on his grief when Gandlaf pointed it out to him.
Bilbo almost sighed in relief to see Rivendell and he almost managed a smiled before his vision went black and he dropped to the ground to the horror of his companion.
Gandlaf carried Bilbo quickly to Lord Elrond, who took Bilbo to a privet room and refused Gandalf entry for hours.
Bilbo woke with a feeling of emptiness and a wave of sorrow. He frowned at the Elf Lord that sat in the chair beside his bed, he tried to sit up but a burning pain across his lower abdomen halted him.
"Be still, Master Baggins." Lord Elrond said softly.
"What happened?" Bilbo asked as he gazed at the Elf.
"We had to remove the babe." Elrond informed him quietly, "It was dead inside you and was making you quiet sick."
Bilbo gazed at Lord Elrond incomprehensively, "Babe?"
Elrond's face twisted, "You were pregnant, Master Baggins, I would guess during the battle the afterbirth separated from your womb."
"What does that mean?" Bilbo found himself asking, voice small.
"Essentually, Master Baggins, the babe starved within you."
Bilbo felt tears in his eyes and turned his gaze to the ceiling.
Elrond stood gracefully and walked to the door.
"Can I see him?" Bilbo asked as Elrond opened the door.
"Of course, we were unsure if you wanted to bury him here or take him to the Shire."
"I want to take him." Bilbo said, "Could, could you make a stone coffen for him?"
Elrond's eyes grew wet and he nodded, "We will."
Elrond left and returned moments later a very small bundle of blankets held in his arms.
Bilbo found himself reaching for the bundle, hardly aware of his actions and there was heaviness in his arms instead of his belly and Bibo let his tears stream down his face as he buried his nose in the babe's dark hair and sobbs made his body shake as he counted tiny fingers and toes and pressed his hand over where a heartbeat should have been.
Elrond watched him without comment and found himself leaving Bilbo alone with the remains of his child, the grief too much to watch.
Bilbo looked down at the babe, he looked like he was sleeping had there been a heartbeat under his hand but there was none. Bilbo let his thumb trace the apple of a cheek, he prayed that Mahal and Yavanna were kind, that they had placed the small soul into Thorin's ams in the Dwarrow Halls of Waiting and if being half-Hobbit excluded him from being welcomed there Bilbo hoped that his parents were the ones that would be given the baby soul, he knew that they would show him the love an care he would miss because Bilbo had failed in protecting him before he entered to world.
He hoped that Thorin would forgive him for failing to protect the small being he hadn't been aware of. Bilbo's tears fell on the babe's face and began soaking the blankets he was wrapped in.
"Dwarrow give their children an outer name and a secret name." Bilbo whispered to the child quietly, "Your father gave me his and I will carry it with me until I enter Yavanna's Garden. I cannot gift you wit a Dwarrow secret name but perhaps yoru father would not mind you having a secret name in the tongue of Hobbits."
Bilbo kissed the child's forehead, "Pellelee (Peh-lay-lay), is the name I give you, it means 'Beautiful Soul'."
Bilbo held the child close to his heart, speaking quietly to him, until Elrond returned hours later and apologized for having to take the child from him.
"Where is Gandalf?" Bilbo asked when he realized that the Wizard had not bothered him.
"He found other business to attend when I refused to answer his questions about your injuries. I will organize you an escort to the Shire."
"Thank you." Bilbo said.
Bilbo couldn't bring himself to ride a pony, he had to walk with his Pellelee, his hand not leaving the carven stone since he had placed the small body within.
The wagon didn't jostle, and the Elves riding slowly beside him did not look at him, Bilbo was glad of the iilusion of privacy and ignored the slight commotion when they arrived at Bag-End, the twin sons of Elrond lifting the Stone coffen and carrying it to where Bilbo wanted it.
Bilbo knelt next to the stone and pulled from his pocket an acorn, which he planted at the head of the coffin, he would plant flowers around the little coffin because he could not bare the thought that his Pellelee would not be surrounded by flowers in the afterlife, he hoped that Mahal would allow his babe to see his parents in Yavanna's Garden.
Bilbo never knew how long it was before Hamfast led him into Bag-End and helped him to bed, he never asked where the starter flowers came from but he appriciated that he did not offer his help in planting them around the stone, nor did he ask if they needed watering.
Bilbo watered the blooms everyday and sat among them and talked, he told the story of his journey unknowing or uncaring about the other small faunts that wandered near to hear the tales.
But most often Bilbo prayed that his Pellelee was held safely in Thorin's arms and that Fili and Kili were happy with their new cousin and Bilbo prayed that they would forgive him for sending Pellelee to their arms so soon.
*I may add to this later but I haven't decided yet.*