"To have faith is to be sure of the things we hope for, to be certain of the things we cannot see. It was in their faith that the people of ancient times won God's approval."
- Hebrews 11: 1-2
Let us fully examine within ourselves what this season really meant…this is not about erotic love or that love with the opposite sex but rather a season of simple and pure love, of sacrifices and unparalleled devotion.
Faith
The sun was setting then - its orange hues filling the gaps in between the horizon. As the waves ever more crash through the sandy shores, a lone figure sat in silence. In a chair he laid his tired back against, simply observing the beauty nature poured before his eyes.
How generous, how genuine, how majestic is that sight. Yet, his eyes remained instilled in the dark, they cannot see what was before.
"Come here…"
"One, two, three…" a little boy hopped here and there, carrying a basket loaded with bread.
"Be careful…" came a lady's voice.
"Yes mom!"
He breathed in the cool scent of the western wind. The darkness was coming as the stars appear one by one. The moon shone all the more fully as the sun fights off the impending gloom.
He had been a counselor, a refuge, and a friend. He was, is and will always be a man of God. He, who is his sole refuge and strength.
"Sarah, is that you?" he whispered as a creak was heard not far from him.
A little girl wearing a pink dress nodded, beaming her whites as if telling him she had always been there. She then walked towards the man and knelt before him, her arms extending to his lap. She tried her hardest to give a very cute glow in her eyes. The man simply laughed.
He could not see what she was doing but somehow felt the eagerness in the child.
"Mister, why does everyone call you reverend?" she innocently asked, still in the same stance. Her voice was filled with anticipation. This man had always been a good playmate to her and she felt a special fondness towards him – like that of a daughter to her father.
"Reverend?" a pink-haired girl asked as she looked up at the man. He kept his eyes closed all the time…and she wondered why.
"Come on now, Lacus, this is Reverend Malchio…greet him the way you greet everyone else." A blonde man then quipped, holding the hand of his little princess.
The man in a "funny" outfit then knelt down and removed the hat he was wearing at the time. He bowed his head and moved a hand towards the girl.
She glanced back at her father who simply gave her a hearty smile. Letting go of the hold she had in his hand, she approached the kneeling man and took his hand in hers.
The said man smiled at the gesture and this caused an unusual easiness in the girl. She broke into a smile and hugged the man as immediately as the same graced her lips.
"I'm Lacus – nice to meet you, Mister Reverend!"
In all this, the blonde laughed with joy.
"Well, people call me that…" replied the man as he took little Sarah in his lap.
"What is a reverend?"
He paused for a while, then in a soft tone he replied.
"He is someone who is in service of our Lord." He explained.
"Aww…"
He smiled at the little girl then shifted his head towards where the waves met the sands.
"Why are you looking at the sea?" she asked, with the same innocence embedded in her tone. She looked at the sea, then at the man who held her carefully.
"It has a beautiful sound." He simply said, his ears attentive to the rumblings of his surroundings.
"Really?"
She jumped from his lap and then raced towards the railings of the balcony from not far, her eyes glimmering with excitement.
"Where? Where?"
The reverend laughed at this as he, too, stood up and went towards the little girl – her voice acting as his guide.
Getting the feel of the railings, he leaned slightly against it – keeping the warmth in his heart.
"You cannot see it with your eyes, young one."
"Why not?" she hastily replied, slight disappointment in her face.
"Tell me, can you see the chirping of the birds?"
"Hmm…"
The little girl remained silent as if thinking about something. She then looked up at the waiting reverend.
"I could see them flying in the sky…"
"You cannot, am I right?"
He handled the kids with such care and patience. His voice never demeaning or demanding. His tone was calm and soothing. It was as if peace was always on his side.
The girl nodded and mumbled a soft "Yeah…"
"Do you still want to hear the waves?"
"But I already do…"
The man again laughed. His hand patting the head of the girl.
"What sound is it then?" he asked, curious as what her reply could be.
"Umm, bruuushhh! Bruuushhh! Or something like that."
This earned another echo of laughter from her companion. He then stopped patting her head as he stood in silence.
"Don't you hear it, too?" she asked, noticing the sudden stillness.
"Do you want to know what I hear?"
"Yep!"
"I hear my mother's voice. And little Lacus'. And the little children's muffled laughter…" he answered, a smile painted on his face.
"How did you hear all of that?" bewildered, she asked as her hand found its way to the reverend's clothing.
"It's because you kept your eyes opened."
Confused, Sarah then closed her eyes.
"But I cannot hear anything…just bruusshhh…"
"Can you hear my voice?"
"Yeah, crystally clear!"
"Is it not what you hear then?"
"Huh?"
She then opened her eyes only to find the reverend back on his seat. She could not believe it. She heard him clearer when he was in fact seating a couple of inches away. Much more than when he was standing next to her.
Her eyes widened. She then ran her little feet towards his seat.
"Hmm, how did ya know I closed my eyes?" she inquired, suspiciously.
"I could tell."
She gave him a 'I-don't-believe-you' look. But then, the reverend just smiled, though he did not see such gesture.
Sarah was a bright one, in fact, she was the brightest among all the orphans. He saw something in her, the same glow he saw in a particular little girl too. And it may have been that very same reason he had always looked after her with much gusto. He took care of all the children and he treated each one with a certain degree of uniqueness.
"You should go to bed now." Suggested the reverend.
The little girl was in fact hesitant but with much persuading, she then gave in.
"What about you?" she asked, her little head slightly looking over at him from the inside.
"I want to hear more sounds."
He continuously wore the little smile on his face. Somehow, the children brought a very fond effect on him. She then gave him a good night as her figure disappeared from sight.
Seating once more in solitude, he breathed in the air. His hand slowly reached towards that part in his face which brought the same darkness in his life.
It must have been many years but he had remained steadfast. His heart was willing and his thoughts headstrong. When everything else was in turmoil, he found peace in silence and refuge in Him. He had protected the ones he loved by means of prayers – for such were powerful. And his faith, unwavering, kept him from falling off the pits of the unknown beyond.
It was in these nights that he called upon God – a special time a mortal and an Immortal meet. It was in this time during the dead of the evening that his sightless eyes more clearly see everything. His ears, all the more, eager. His spirit, all the more encompassing.
He knew the answer all along. The answer Mr. Yamato and the others had been searching for. Yet he did not want to give them that for he can see, rather, feel the determination in them – to search for their own answers in the course of their lives.
His sight was taken away from him but it was never a loss. For he can see more than what they can see. He can feel more than what they can feel. He can hear things their ears were deaf of.
Little Lacus held his hand tightly as she jumped from one pole to another. She then stopped as her eyes caught sight of the setting sun.
This, the reverend noticed.
"What is it?" he asked, his head shifting to where he can feel the warmth.
"It's beautiful…" she replied. Her eyes widened in astonishment. The reverend then fell silent for a moment and listened carefully. The pelicans were in the sea, creating a familiar noise as they caught fishes in their beaks. Others flew to the wide expanse, muffling their wings with the sound of a hem. Then, the waves were crashing the shores, like a rock tumbling over another rock – violent but enchanting. Then, there, too, was the faint sound of the passing wind. It was cool and calming. All these mixed together formed a near-perfect harmony – an orchestra playing in his ears.
"It is…" he replied. She then glanced at him, her free hand waving in front of his face. He felt the small brush of her finger on his nose.
"What are you doing?" smiling, he asked her.
"How could you tell? You cannot see…" she inquired. Of course, this was to take no offense to the man. Children will remain to be children. Honest and straightforward.
"But I am not void of hearing, or feeling…or smelling." He answered carrying Lacus on her arms. After which, laying her down on the graveled surface.
"Void?" she again asked. The word seemingly unfamiliar to her innocent being.
"It means not given with…or an exception among others." He knelt before her as he dusted the small fragments of sand on her shoes.
She looked at him as he did this, admiration on her eyes.
"Mister Reverend?"
"Yes?" He then stood up and held her hand. They again walked the side of the road.
"What can you see?" she then asked. They stopped walking for a while as he paused to think.
"What I see?"
"Yes. Tell me…please, Mister Reverend…" she pleaded. Young as she was, he could tell her wit and charm simply infectious. He could sense this young girl's intelligence and extent of knowledge. And at an early age at that.
"What do you want me to describe for you?"
"Anything!" jolly in her tone, she answered, gripping his hand tighter. They'd sway their arms momentarily and in doing so, fill the land with laughter.
"I see the sea on my right. And the sky above…still colored blue."
"I see only black…" she replied. The reverend stopped walking upon hearing this.
"Did you close your eyes?" he asked to which she responded with a "yes".
"Then you should see many things other than black."
She looked up at him, her eyes eyeing him carefully. She could still see the smile on his face, though the darkness started creeping in.
Once more, she closed her eyes.
"I see white dots…then a little glow of light from my…right!" she then opened them and pointed a finger at the direction of the setting sun.
"See? You saw many things other than black." The reverend then lead her towards the nearby structure.
"How come you can walk this road? Can you see it?" she asked once more. Since the time she met Reverend Malchio, she couldn't help but ask him many things. Somehow, she felt he was a knowledgeable man and a very honest one. Someone who could answer her inquiries without pretensions.
"I can see many things other than black."
"Hmm, then tell me…" she then stopped walking which caused the man to do the same.
"…what dress am I wearing?"
The reverend examined her, as if he had his eyes wide opened, acting as if he could really see the little lady with him.
"Well, no matter what dress you wore…I still think it fits you just the same." He then replied which caused the other to carry a wide grin on her face.
"Thank you." She answered as she let go of her hold on his hand. She then ran towards a familiar house and upon reaching the balcony, he shouted with all her strength.
"Come here, Mister Reverend!" she then waved at him, cheerfulness showing in her actions.
He could sense the happiness welling from the young Lacus' heart. He then walked towards her and upon reaching the steps, he could hear her guiding voice.
"There are a couple of steps there…one, two, three…"
This caused some flashbacks of memories in him that he held a firm grip on the railings of the paneled steps.
"Be careful!" she blurted as she went to his side. Obviously, she was worried.
"Yes, I will. Thank you, Little Ms. Clyne." He replied as he accepted the assistance offered to him.
He smiled at the thought. He then stood up from his chair and walked towards the shore. The sea was calm, not enraged with anger as it appeared earlier. It was more subtle, more relaxing. The weather was temperate. It was the perfect time to reflect on things – on different things.
He walked along the coastlines, having removed his shoes, he felt the brittle sand against his bare feet.
The children were all preparing a wonderful lunch for a particular visitor and her companion. When everything was set, they all went to their places and awaited their guests' arrival.
No sooner than they have finished the necessary preparations, their expected visitors came.
"Reverend!" greeted a lady's voice upon opening the door. She was welcomed by little children which caught her off-guarded. She laughed at the sight as each orphan tried to impress her as much as they could.
Momentarily, her eyes shifted in the room. She saw the table well-done and the other children cuddling her companion.
"Settle down children, we haven't got all day for the welcoming." Came the relieving voice of the reverend.
One by one, the children left the two visitors some breathing room. She then moved towards the reverend as she held out her hand towards him, which the said man gladly took.
"Reverend, it's been so long." She started. He simply smiled at this.
"Yes, I could tell, you're no longer Little Miss Clyne…" he replied to which the pink-haired girl gave a soft giggle. Letting go of the friendly handshake, she went towards a certain blue-haired man and introduced him to everyone.
"This is Athrun Zala. He is a very good friend of mine." The young man then went forward and held his right hand up – towards the reverend.
"I'm Athrun Zala, it is my pleasure to meet you."
The reverend simply paused for a while, then took a moment to himself before accepting the gesture.
"It is the same as mine. I am Reverend Malchio. Feel free to come here anytime you wish to, Mr. Zala…" with much compassion and acceptance, he answered back – just as politely as the tone Athrun gave him.
"Just Athrun, sir. I don't want anything to be formal…"
"Yes, if that is what you want. I could tell, though I am blind, something more than good friendship binds you and Miss Clyne."
With such reply, Athrun immediately let go of the handshake and blushed madly, his eyes avoiding the closed ones of the man before him. This, too, caused the same reaction on the pink-haired girl. The reverend simply shrugged his shoulders and smiled at them. He then offered them seats in the dining room.
"Besides, both of you had a long trip from the Plants. You will surely enjoy this simple meal everyone here made."
With much cheering, everyone then proceeded to their seats.
It had been long since he had felt the touch of the calm waters. He used to do such whenever he had the time but the past two wars somehow affected not only the children but also his solace. Indeed, the wars left no one unaffected.
As he talked to the survivors, mainly people whom he fondly knew, he could see the scars and marks the devastating and unwanted events left in their hearts. It was in moments like these that he was able to contemplate on the events unfolding before them.
Then, he recalled the conversation he had with someone…which happened not long ago. In fact, it took place within the same day…concealed from everyone else's knowing.
"Reverend," called a young Gundam pilot.
The reverend was at his usual seat, simply listening to the sounds nature created for those who dwell on this land.
"How may I help you?" he replied as he sat up straight. His young companion then went towards the railings and leaned against it.
"I…I'm…I'm feeling weak." The brown-haired man replied. His jet black jacket muffling with the wind.
The reverend could tell the trouble in his voice…the worry and doubts his heart calls out.
"Have you been tired?" he inquired, his knowing eyes looking through the young coordinator's heart.
"I guess."
"Don't you want to rest?"
"I can't. Not now, not yet."
The reverend sighed and stood up from his seat.
"Then, what do you want to do?" he approached him and patted his shoulder.
The brown-haired coordinator looked at the man who was now standing behind him – whose hand lay on his shoulder like that of a caring father to a son – a brother to a comrade.
"I don't really know." His purple eyes possessing all sincerity and truthfulness. His frailty showing in his tone.
"Then, go with where the wind takes you. Maybe then, you'll know what you want to do, where exactly you want to go…"
"I'm not sure what wind that is." He then straightened his back as he looked up at the dark skies.
Removing his hand on his shoulder, he, too, raised his head towards the unknown expanse which was the sky.
"No one really does…don't you think?" he asked to which the young coordinator gave some thought on. He looked at the reverend then returned his gaze once more towards the star-painted horizon.
"How can you trust something or the path set before you without knowing what brought the same to you?" still with unclear thoughts bothering his mind, he asked.
The reverend then took in deep breaths as if enjoying the soothing atmosphere.
"Mister Yamato, do you trust only the things your eyes can see?"
This somehow intrigued the Freedom pilot as he glanced once more at the reverend.
"Shouldn't I?"
"I trust the plan He set before us…the path He had chosen early on. I cannot see you, Mister Yamato, but I trust you. I cannot even see the road, yet I know each step I'll take will lead me to my destination. And don't you trust the crew of the Archangel just by hearing their voice?"
"The circumstances caused that. I had to trust because if I didn't, I'd be gone…none in the world of the living."
The reverend then touched his closed eyes, caressing them.
"Circumstances also caused this. But by trusting, I overcame it - the darkness brought about by my blindness." He then lowered his hand to his side as he gave another smile to the young coordinator.
"How do I go from here? After two wars, I haven't found my answer yet. How do I overcome my own darkness?" Kira then asked, his eyes searching for the answers to his seemingly confusing questions.
"It is in your eyes that you see the world. But it is in your heart that you feel it - the beauty it possesses within its core. Faith, Kira, all you need is faith." He answered, with much convincing in his tone.
"Faith?"
"To be sure of the things we hope for, to be certain of the things we cannot see."
Kira then stood silent, thinking over the words the man with him recently uttered.
"Did you have faith in yourself?"
"It is already given though we never really knew it. But what you must have is something far greater…"
"What is it then?"
The reverend then took a small object from his pocket and held it tightly in between his fingers.
Kira's eyes reflected the silver object his companion held in his hand. Though little, its illumination dazzled his eyes.
"A friend once told me; it is only in this that I may be able to reach greater heights. That I may be able to realize what I ought to realize. And it is my lack of this that I had been weak. And I am still hoping that I'll be able to have this – to be able to say I had trusted and I was not failed." The reverend then turned his head towards the sea as he continued.
"There is nothing certain…but it is in this uncertainty that we continuously live our lives…it would be thrilling to be able to wake up each morning and say we are alive…we are blessed to have woken up for another day…to continue our lives once again…to love and be loved…accept and be accepted. And aren't these enough to look forward to? Weak or strong, what difference does it make when you know for yourself that you can overcome the coming trials?"
He had given advices to those who were weary – to those who felt life was bitter and can never be good again. Yet it was in his conversations with the people that he felt similar to them. He was after all, a man – the same as they were. He could not give such advices by himself alone. He was weak but it was in the same weakness that he found strength.
No one was ever alone for if that is true, then no one could live in such a terrible and plagued world. This fact kept him from falling stray.
For to help others was the way he knew was right – the way he knew He gave him.
"It must have been this long an evening…" he whispered as the waves crashed over each other that fine evening.
He could feel the warmth brought about by the shade of the moon, subtle silhouette of the dark.
"..but I thank You for the wonderful things around me, for those You allowed and graced me to meet…"
"Reverend!" a lady's voice called out from not afar. It was as if she was in search for something, or rather, someone with the tone she had in her voice. He tilted his body to where it came from, and a particular image appeared in his mind.
"Mister Reverend!"Little Lacus called, waving at him as she ran towards him. He could tell the happiness in her voice. This little girl had been truly a part of his life.
"Thank you, too, for this child…" he then placed a smile on his face.
She ran towards the man as if she had not seen him before.
"You might catch a cold out here, Reverend Malchio…" she exclaimed upon reaching him. She was obviously catching her breath yet she wore the same smile she used to wear with all honesty welled from her heart.
"How was the party?" he asked, with the tone like that of a caring father.
"It was good – no – it was wonderful." She replied.
"I suggest you go to bed now, you need all the rest you can get."
She then let out a small and contented laugh as she nodded her head. "Yes, I think that is what I should do…"
"…and you should do the same…" before turning around, she added.
"Surely Mr. Yamato is on his way to bed…" answered the reverend. Upon hearing his name, she suddenly stopped walking and instead listened further.
"…but I think you may still catch him on your way to yours. I believe you somehow wanted to see him before falling asleep…"
With that, her face lighted up – brushed with a bright tint of pink yet her voice full of delight and momentary gratitude.
"Thank you…"
It must have been due to her excitement on seeing the brown-haired man that she almost as instantly left the reverend by himself. Not forgetting her manners, when she was a noticeable distance away, she waved her hand and shouted a "good night" to the man, then, proceeded on her way to the structure built along the beach.
In all this, he stood his ground, listening to the footsteps she made on the sands. And once more he looked up at the sky, in his heart he knew…
The reverend then took her hand as both strolled along the coast once more.
"Mister Reverend…" she started to which he simply listened in silence.
"I thank whoever sent my daddy and my mommy in this world. But I think I should thank my daddy for one more thing…"
This little girl could say things she so wishes to say without failing to catch the amusement of whoever she was talking to. She was a bright one, her young age didn't hinder her quest for new learnings and he saw the potential possessed.
"And what is that?" he asked upon noticing the silence from the little one.
"…'cause he said you're a good person…and it's true."
"This child…would always be Little Miss Lacus Clyne to me…"
And as he ever more traced the path of the coast, he carries with him a newly-discovered strength. His heart beats and his feet follow wherever the wind, no matter how strong, blew him.
-End-
Dedication:
Aki, this one's for you…thank you for all the things you've done…thank you…