A/N: A slightly pointless and shamelessly unedited Jay fic. Hope you like :)
Well, it looks like this is it, then. The end, for me, anyway. Four weeks, and Jay Faldren is gone, baby.
Now I think about it, those cards were a stupid idea. Hindsight's a wonderful thing, I guess. That's pretty much the story of my life, isn't it? Doing stupid things and regretting them later. Except I always land on my feet, get out of it somehow – but not this time. Good old bloody Charlie's had enough of me, and who can blame him? I've never been able to tell when it's safe to push your luck.
It's the end of my shift. I get my bag from my locker and sling it over my shoulder, leaving the ED without a word to anyone, although I'm trying to look like I couldn't care less. I keep my eyes focused ahead of me, practically feeling the harsh look from Charlie, who's standing over at the desk, sorting some files. The sympathetic glance from Alice is almost as bad.
You'd think I'd be able to shrug something like this off, start over – it's what I've always done before. But I'm not sure it's going to be that easy this time. I really thought I'd made it here. Sure, I didn't start out too well, with my interview and all that, but Charlie did give me another chance – ironic, that – and I thought I'd proved myself to him, to everyone. None of that counts for anything now, does it, just because of some stupid Valentine's prank!
But no, I can't shift the blame onto them, though God knows I'm trying. This whole thing would be a lot easier to take if I could. Back in high school I was class clown, always the comedian. I spent half those five years in detention because I didn't know when to stop, but it was never my fault – you know how it is. It was easy then to badmouth the teachers with my mates, laugh it all off. But I can't do that now. Maybe I've grown up a bit, after all. Because let's face it, I've only got myself to blame.