Behind Him All The Way

Chapter 1

Mike pulled the LTD to a stop just short of the gold colored Porsche and sighed heavily. Exiting the car he looked out at the Golden Gate Bridge, spreading out majestically before him, catching the last rays of the setting evening sun, a sight that never failed to impress him and make him proud to call San Francisco his home. Soon the lights would come on and the city would come alive. He took a few lungfuls of the fresh sea breeze that was quite strong this evening and making his way to the top of the slope he looked down on the beach below. At this time of the evening the beach was more or less deserted except for a few dog walkers or late evening joggers and that's when he saw the figure of his young partner sitting on an outcrop of rocks, hurling small pebbles towards the sea. He was in a thin blue shirt, his tie missing and Mike also wondered what had become of his jacket and inwardly shivered at how cold he must be. His wavy locks were being blown out of their usual well coiffured order by the stiff sea breeze and he seemed lost in his own thoughts.

Mike sighed heavily and heading briefly back to his car, he opened and reached into the trunk and pulled out a woolen blanket and draped it over his arm. Then buttoning up his overcoat right to the neck, he started to descend down the steep rocky steps that led onto Baker Beach. As he made his way down he thought about the previous six months since Steve had become his new partner. At first he had been reluctant to train someone new in but Olsen had insisted, so he had been left with no other choice than to take the kid under his wing. He smiled as he remembered his first impression of the young, newly promoted Assistant Inspector. Dressed in fancy clothes, not a store label in sight, driving his old but equally fancy Gold Porsche and with longer hair than any detective he'd known before he had like many others been a little hasty with his first impressions. A college boy know it all, too big for his boots. A mere slip of a boy, still wet behind the ears, trying to make his way in a man's world but boy had he been wrong!

The young man had, over the last six months, proved himself more than capable as a homicide detective. He was neat, almost meticulous where typing his reports was concerned, his case files paper clipped together in impeccable detail and his investigative skills and instincts were without fault. He never left any stone unturned or any clue without being followed up. His shooting skills at the range were more than impressive and even some of Mike's older colleagues were in awe of his skill. He followed instructions and rarely complained even in the early days when God knows Mike and the other detectives had perhaps made his life difficult and had given him every right to. He had made the coffee, spent hours down in records and filed case files back in alphabetical order and many more tasks that a college boy know it all, had he really been one, would have protested vehemently but not Steve. He was amicable, personable and hardworking and over the six months they had struck up a rapport. A familiar and comfortable partnership and friendship was developing between them and even now they were slowly adjusting to each other.

Then today happened. Mike feared that he hadn't perhaps prepared his partner for what had gone down. After all, the boy was his understudy, so to speak and Mike was meant to be showing him the ropes. Today he felt he had let the boy down badly and now he was more determined than ever to pick up the young man's broken pieces and set him back straight no matter what it took.

The steep path had proved tricky to maneuver down and especially against the strong breeze that he was fighting against. When he finally stepped down onto the sand he was relieved that the wind was not quite as strong at ground level, the cliff face providing limited shelter but it was still cold, cold as hell in fact. He headed towards the young man and noticed that he never even saw him approach. Getting closer, he watched Steve skim more stones out onto the water's surface and cleared his throat purposefully, finally drawing Steve's attention.

Steve looked around startled and Mike almost gasped as he saw the wide eyed and troubled look on his partner's face. He watched as the young man quickly looked away and spoke more to the sea than back at him.

"Mike? ... What ... what are YOU doing here?"

Mike swallowed hard before answering.

"Well, I would have thought that was quite obvious ... Looking for you. I thought I sent you home earlier?"

Even with his back turned , Mike could sense Steve's flustering.

"Ah ... yeah ... yeah I guess you did. I ah ... I just fancied a stroll on the beach. There's no crime in that, is there?"

"No ... No, I guess not." Mike answered, watching Steve closely.

He waited for Steve to speak next and didn't have to wait long.

"How ah ... How did you find me here? What did you do? Put out an APB on me? " Steve asked with an irritable and almost sarcastic tone to his voice.

Mike didn't rise to the bait however and shrugged his shoulders.

"I thought about it ... But that car of yours is pretty easy to find so I found you all by myself as it happens. "

Steve threw a sideways look back at Mike and could see that Mike was going to be hard to get rid of. He didn't want him here witnessing his difficulty. He had spent too long proving his worth as a capable partner to have the older man see this side of him. Not now. He could handle it,but in his own way like always. But not with Mike as his chaperone.

"You don't have to babysit me Mike. I'm fine. So it was a rough day. I can handle it, ok?"

"Can you?"

" YEAH!" he stated defiantly before turning his gaze back to the sea as a lump appeared in his throat that belied his spoken word.

Mike wasn't fooled. He walked closer and saw the young man shivering.

"The sea breeze sure is cold this time of the evening, huh? Of course it would have helped if you'd brought your jacket. Steve? Where ah ... is your jacket from earlier? I ah ... I didn't see it in your car. "

Steve stopped still as a statue, as he heard the one question he had hoped he wouldn't be asked and one he knew he couldn't lie about. He didn't respond and Mike persisted.

"Steve? I asked you where your jacket was?"

Knowing he was not going to take silence for an answer, he stared down at the breaking waves as the tide came in and answered almost in a whisper.

"I ah ... I threw it in a trash can up in the car park ..."

Mike dry swallowed and stepped forward, draping the woolen blanket around Steve's shoulders as he did as he realized the seriousness of Steve actions and feeling Steve tense up as he did.

"Here, I brought this for you. "

Steve merely nodded gratefully and pulled the blanket tight around his neck with a fisted hand.

"You could have just got it laundered Buddy boy. Those fancy jackets of yours cost quite a bit don't they? Seems a waste to just dump it like that."

Steve shivered again and answered in as normal a voice as he could muster, feeling his resolve breaking and desperately trying not to let the cracks in his armor show.

"His blood was all over it Mike. Even if it was cleaned I'd ... I'd still see the bloodstains."

Mike draped an arm around Steve's shoulders and spoke compassionately.

"Steve, look. It wasn't your fault. The man was going to take his own life no matter what you said or did. "

Steve pushed Mike's arm away and let the blanket fall to the sand. He backed up away from Mike and ran a shaking hand through his windswept hair.

"NO! No you're wrong Mike! I was getting through to him. He was listening to me. He was going to give me the gun. I just needed a few more minutes, that's all ..."

Mike rushed forward unexpectedly and grabbed Steve's shoulders firmly.

"STEVE! Don't do this. Don't second guess what happened. Sure, he was listening to you, having cold feet maybe but ... but he was never going to change his mind. He went to that cafe to kill himself and that's what he was going to do no matter what, do you hear me? "

"Maybe we should have waited for the Psychologist Mike. I mean what was I thinking? I ... I really thought I could talk him down, you know? How arrogant was that? I mean what the hell do I know about that sort of thing, huh? I mean I haven't been trained in that right? "

"Steve, you conducted yourself perfectly at that crime scene. You helped evacuate the other customers and staff and you tried to talk to him until the Psychologist got there. You did good Buddy Boy. I heard most of what you said to him. You couldn't have tried harder to save him. If we had waited for the Psychologist the result would have been the same. At least this way someone listened to him. Someone shared his pain and listened to him and that was all he wanted before he ah ... well before he ah ..."

" ... Blew his brains out right in front of me. Is that what you're struggling to say Mike? I couldn't stop him Mike ... I ... I really tried ... you know? No-one should feel they have to do that Mike. No-one ... should have that as their only option ... It's not fair ..."

"Well now who ever told you life is fair, HUH? Is it fair that people get killed day in and day out in this city and we have the lousy job of breaking the news to their loved ones or is it fair that parents hearts are broken on a daily basis by kids that overdose on the drugs that come into this city that we can't seem to shut down. WELL IS IT?"

Steve shook his head as his eyes watered in the dying, evening light. Hearing Steve's labored breathing he remembered the first time he had seen someone take their own life, not in his time in the force but during his time in the Marines and he knew how badly it had affected him. He calmed his temper and patted Steve's shoulder sympathetically knowing that on this occasion tough love was NOT going to work but that the painful truth would help a whole lot more. He had hoped to pass on this heartbreaking information to his partner back at his apartment earlier when he had called to check on him but it looked like it was going to have to be here instead.

"Steve, sit down will you? There's something you need to know. "

Steve stared helplessly at Mike, now curious as to what he was referring to. He allowed Mike to push him gently back against the rock behind him and even allowed him to retrieve the blanket and drape it around his shoulders again. Steve waited patiently for Mike to continue and watched as Mike seemed to struggle with what he had to say.

"Steve, today after I ... well after I sent you home, me and Lessing went to the man's house. "

Steve could feel a sinking sensation developing in the pit of his stomach. It was the same feeling that always came just before bad news. He almost wanted to cover his ears and block out Mike's words but he somehow knew that whatever Mike had found was going to explain to him why the incident had happened and right now it remained the one thing that bothered him deeply. What had driven the man to such desperation?

Mike stopped briefly and gave Steve a desperate look and Steve could see he was appraising how he would take the news.

"Steve, we found two bodies. A woman's and a small child's ... "

Steve was suddenly glad he was sitting down. If he had been still standing he wouldn't have trusted his legs to hold him up. He processed the horrific information and spoke shakily.

"Dear God Mike ... His family?"

Mike nodded sadly.

"His name was Bob Haskins. The dead woman was Michelle Haskins and the little boy, their son Tommy was only four years old. He was a construction worker who was laid off six months ago. We talked to his neighbors. It seems that times were tough and they were struggling to pay bills and fighting a lot. She was threatening to take the boy and leave him. Looks like he just ... snapped ..."

Steve's eyes were now misted completely as he struggled to comprehend what could possibly possess anyone to hurt their wife and child.

"He ... he killed them?"

Mike nodded and Steve swore he saw tears in the older man's eyes too in that moment.

"So you see Steve. He knew he'd done wrong. That cafe was where he met his wife. He was going to pull that trigger no matter what. There was nothing you could have done differently."

Steve exhaled sharply and looked down at the sand and the waves that were starting to lap now in around the rocks where he was sitting. He didn't know what to say. All he managed were three words that seemed to be brimming with angst and regret.

"Aw Gees Mike ..."

Mike watched Steve cover his face with his hands and struggle with the new information. The man's actions made sense now. Even some of the words he had shared with Steve were clearer now that he knew the savage truth. Mike moved a step closer until he was right in front of Steve and then got down on his haunches so that he was looking up slightly towards his partner's position on the rock.

"I know what you're thinking Buddy boy and the answer is yes."

That statement drew Steve's attention and he dropped his hands and stared at Mike incredulously.

"How the hell do you know what I'm thinking?"

"Because I know. It's the same for all of us when we start this job. You're asking yourself are you really cut out for Homicide? Have you got what it takes? Can you steel your heart when you witness such vile and unfathomable acts. Can you get through other days like this because make no mistake about it Buddy Boy. There will be. Homicide is a grim, thankless and sometimes heartbreaking job but it's like everything, it's a dirty job but someone has to do it. Now I know you've been trying hard to impress these last six months and believe me you have. And not just me either. You've proven yourself in many situations that lesser people would have froze in but we don't expect you to be a heartless robot either Steve. The fact that you care is what makes me one hundred percent certain that you have what it takes. Do you think I didn't shed a tear when I found little Tommy's body earlier, huh? Well do you? "

Steve stared at his Boss and partner and shook his head. When he had gone to work with Mike everyone had tried to tease him and told him about Mike's nickname Iron Mike and Steve had at first perhaps thought it was because he didn't allow himself to be affected by the tragedies on the job but he had learned on many occasions since then that he was wrong and had seen Mike deeply affected by crime scenes at various times. He knew the woman and child's deaths would have affected him badly too.

"Steve, can I tell you something?"

Steve nodded, still slightly taken aback by the flow of compliments that Mike had just lavished on him earlier.

"If I'd found you at home earlier watching the game and not affected by today I would have been MORE worried about you. It's ok to be upset by things that happen on the job. It's healthy to question why they happened and to analyze them so that we learn from those situations but don't over think them Buddy boy. You have to accept that you did all you could and then vow to fight another day. As much as we'd like to, you and me, we can't save them all. All we can do is keep trying to."

By the end of Mike's speech, Steve felt a little more at ease. The sight he had witnessed so horrifically just ten hours earlier would stay with him for quite some time. Even though he had washed the man's blood off his face numerous times he could almost still feel it on him but he felt supported and not so alone anymore and Mike's words had meant a lot. He watched Mike stand back up and stood up too as the sea started coming through the rocks and pooling around their feet. Satisfied that he had got through to the young man by the change of emotion visible in the young man's eyes Mike spoke encouragingly.

"Uh oh. Looks like the tide is coming in Buddy boy. Come on. Let's get you home. And tomorrow I want you to go talk to Lenny. Rudy is insisting on it."

"Aw Mike ..."

"Ah ah! No arguments " Mike spoke firmly, pushing Steve gently ahead of him back towards the steep rocky path. "Talking about it helps even if you don't believe that. It will take a while to put this out of your head but you'll make it. Actually ... we'll make it together. You see that's what makes good partners. What happens to you happens to me and vice versa. Nothing is too hard that we can't face it together. You got that hotshot?" he added humorously grabbing the back of Steve's neck as he ascended.

"Yeah ... Yeah I got it ... Thanks Mike. "

"Sure, sure. "

Arriving back up to the cars, Steve fished in his trouser pocket for his car key.

"Ok Steve, you head out first and I'll follow and no more detours, alright? You're going home to STAY this time and I'm going to follow you there to make sure. "

"Yes Sir " Steve answered teasingly as Mike swatted at his back in reply.

Passing the trash can on his way to the LTD, he peered in and saw Steve's fancy jacket protruding slightly and a large bloodstain was visible from where it did. He felt a shudder run down his spine as he remembered seeing Steve after the shot rang out. The look of hopelessness and despair in the young man's eyes had been heartbreaking and he had gently pulled Steve out of the booth and away from the harrowing scene. He had handed him his handkerchief to wipe the blood off his face and after insisting he was checked over by the Paramedics for possible signs of shock, he had sent the young man home in a black and white. Even as he had watched him being driven away in the back of the patrol car his faraway look had bothered Mike greatly. Now shaking himself back to the present, he looked back at Steve and saw the young man staring at the discarded jacket too, a hint of the same haunted look still on his face.

"You sure you don't want to just get it laundered?"

Steve shook his head sadly and Mike piped up enthusiastically.

"Ok, well leave it with me and I might be able to get Olsen to spring for a new jacket for you on the expense account. After all it was damage incurred in the line of duty, right?"

Steve smiled and it was the first time he had since the incident earlier. It felt good to find something amusing again. Mike was a real tonic and did better head-work than Lenny any day.

"You think he would?"

"Are you kidding me? You obviously haven't seen me in action Buddy boy. You just leave it to me. I'll sort it out."

Steve nodded gratefully and watched as Mike sat into the LTD. He took one more deep breath of fresh sea air as he looked back out to sea one last time and across at the Golden Gate bridge now glowing red from the setting sun. It had been quite a day and he had questioned his path in life many times during it. Now as he stood here in this almost serene place against a breathtaking landscape, his path seemed a little clearer. Mike was right. Life isn't fair and there would be more tough days and tougher decisions ahead but with Mike Stone as his partner, he'd make it through them just like today. Smiling again he heard the beep of a horn and looked across to where Mike sat in his car, gesturing wildly for him to get into the Porsche and drive. With a smile and a placating wave of his hand he sat into his beloved Porsche and drove off, seeing and smiling again at the comforting sight of Mike in his rear-view mirror, behind him all the way.

The End

A/N : This story is complete for now but I do intend to add at least one more chapter to it at some stage dealing with more of the week that followed at some stage as time and real life allows which is why I haven't marked it as complete yet.