"You know, Marie, I really think you're misinterpreting the saying…" Jeanette peered over her friend's shoulder as Marie Llewellyn carefully placed the apple atop the wooden desk, letting it rest against the small nameplate that read, "Dr. Cullen." She chewed the inside of her lip, freckles furrowing slightly before giving a small, nearly triumphant nod.
"That should do it…" Marie mumbled, turning to leave. Jeanette sighed, following her friend out the door quickly, glancing back at the desk every so often. She turned back to her friend, blue eyes questioning, but smirking also.
"Why are you giving him apples? Do you want Dr. Cullen to stay away from you?" A smile lit up both their faces, knowing that they would probably sell their souls for an opportunity to let that particular angel of a doctor follow them around. Marie sighed.
"No, it's just my way of…thanking him, Jeanette…you know…for taking care of me after the…accident last week," Marie looked down, face twisting slowly into a guilty smile as the friends walked down the narrow cobblestone streets of Italy. Jeanette linked arms with her brunette friend, shaking her head in mock shame.
"It's bad for you to have so much on your mind before a show, Marie. I know you're just trying to be nice to him, but he's just as busy as you are with your job. You've thanked him enough after nearly cleaning out the market's supply of apples…give it a rest. We have to travel back to Venice soon anyway…" Marie's stomach dropped as well as her head as she focused on the stones. Jeanette's words were the truth, but the truth was always hard to accept for Marie.
"Yes…I should just forget it…just remember I'm lucky to have been treated by the best doctor in Italy…move on like we always do, yes?" Marie's brown eyes were dark as she tried to smile. Jeanette smiled back, but her blue eyes reflected back the same face.
"Yes…and remember that not only is he the best doctor, he is the best angel here on Earth by far!" Marie couldn't help but laugh at her friend's words. Their giggles echoed off the alley walls as Marie was overcome with nostalgia. How she would miss this place…more so the faces. Her laughs died down as she focused again on her small black shoes. Her mind began drifting to the memory she wished to forget and couldn't help but remember.
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His laugh echoed along with mine: warm, deep…calming. I couldn't help but sigh in utter relief, as his voice seemed to wash away all my pain and troubles. I glanced over at him as a smile continued to light up his face and his bright golden eyes, his tousled blonde hair reminding me of Jeanette's.
"Alright, so is it my turn?" He asked, voice low and just as comforting as to not wake the other patients around me. I nodded, bracing myself for whatever question he may ask…I was not one who liked talking about myself, but with him I felt more relaxed than with Jeanette.
"How did you decide to settle in Italy and perform? Is it even your decision?" I shook my head immediately, as he smiled more. This question wasn't hard to explain, but would eventually be the hardest to deal with in the near future.
"No, Thomas chooses the places we visit and perform. I am the actress; he is the director. We have no choice in where we go. We travel more often than I would like, but Thomas insists on showing the whole world what we can do," I smiled bitterly as I also saw his smile waver. We both waited in silence for a moment.
"I see…" he spoke softly, but just as methodically as usual. My disheartening bit of news did not disturb his calm aura, or so it seemed…
"We will by leaving soon, I think…" I whispered; this was the bit of news I had regretted telling him. He merely nodded.
"Where?" he was whispering also, out of fear of waking the patience, or just because of the importance of the situation, I could not decide which.
"Most likely Venice, then Verona…Thomas is greatly enthused by the idea of Venice. Many performers go there, and maybe he'll decide to settle," I prayed for this option. It would be too far away to visit this small town I had grown fond of, but close enough to write to the doctor I had grown so close to.
"I've thought about working in Venice," he was nearly muttering to himself; I had to strain to hear him. "It's very nice there; a very diverse crowd resides," He grinned as I did as well. "You'll fit in nicely." I winced slightly, my right arm twitching as he sat up immediately. He walked over to the cabinets to bring me more unwanted medicine. I was not a fighter, but I hated being looked after like this…
"I'm not that bad…" I murmured, squirming under the needle he was inserting into my arm. His eyes concentrated on his work, as usual, before he glanced up at me. His eyes had a darker shade of orange, but he still smiled.
"You're bad enough to come here," He walked back over to the cabinets, his white coat nearly touching the floor. "What were you thinking anyway?" he muttered, busying himself with other medicines at the counter. "Jumping off the stage like that, nearly crashing into the hot lights. I'm surprised you lasted through it with one arm still attached…" I grimaced, wanting him to forget my stupidity; especially when I found out he had been in the audience. I guess I was lucky there was a doctor so close by…three rows from where I fell, to be exact.
"Thomas agreed that we should change the curtain call because of me…" He looked back at me from his desk, up from his paperwork and stared into my eyes. He looked almost angry, but then he laughed and I laughed along with him.
"Smart…especially if there are more clumsy people like you in the cast," He stood up with a sigh and a groan. He walked over to my bed as I looked up at him, feeling helpless that I wasn't able to move. He paused, and gave an even deeper sigh.
"I should start around the hospital giving medicine. It's about that time again where I must leave you, Marie," His voice sounded like he was about to add, 'The time that you and I both hate.' I wished he had said it because I knew it was true.
"You'll be back later though, right?" I hated how pleading my voice was. He nodded, smiling down at me, lightly touching my non-broken arm.
"I always have questions for you," he ran his fingers down over my bruises that covered my left arm; his hand was cold, but so light that I barely noticed. He stopped at my fingers, tapping against them ever so slightly, almost playfully.
And then he was gone. It was the night I wanted to burn into my memory. I wanted to remember his smile, his cold fingers, and his intellectual banters with me. I never wanted to forget Carlisle Cullen, but knew once our acting troupe was gone to Venice, he would…just like everyone else…
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"Marie, come! Warm ups!" Jeanette called across the laughing, happy room. Marie slammed back to Earth, sighing out of pure disappointment. She wanted to stay lost in her subconscious, but knew she had work to do. She took a deep breath, trying to get into character, before standing gracefully and taking Jeanette's side near the old, broken piano.
The rest of the night blurred past Marie; the cheers meant nothing tonight, the dance moves all a blur, her voice speaking the lines she knew too well only seemed to blend and mesh together. Marie was unsure whether it was because she was in character and it had become natural for her, or if she was just being herself…either option made Marie uncomfortable.
The cast bustled about backstage, most cheering and laughing and talking once more. Marie stayed quiet, but many people were patting her on the back, Jeanette constantly talking in her ear about how wonderful she was. Marie smiled faintly at them all, nodding and giving out 'thank you' s just like they were free toothpicks. The room grew silent as Thomas- dressed in his typical tuxedo and top hat that he wore when watching the show- stood in front of the crowd.
"I will start off by saying, you were all amazing tonight! The best I've seen of this production!" An amazing uproar of cheers echoed off the backstage walls, Jeanette one of the loud clappers. Marie smile broadened as she clapped softly, still watching Thomas. He continued on, color flushing his pale cheeks as he brushed a piece of brown hair from his eyes.
"Secondly, and I hope this is good news for you all," He seemed to be taking a dramatic pause, just to get on Marie's nerves. "We will not be moving anywhere! This town has greatly enjoyed our performances and I believe we've all grown accustomed to it. Therefore, I have agreed with the town's Stage Company that we stay here till the end of this year and maybe longer!" Marie could not hear the triumphant cheers that erupted. She knew she was smiling, cheering also, maybe even jumping up and down, but her mind heard nothing. It was back to focusing on the nights she had spent with him…
Carlisle…
Marie knew right then, as the crowd began to disappear, that she had to tell him more than anyone. She rushed to her dressing room, ears and mind now aware to her surroundings. Her cheeks were hot with a grateful blush as flowers and small gifts from fans that adored her surrounded her. She wondered for a split second if Carlisle had left anything, but it didn't matter. She was going to go visit him herself.
A small knock rapped against her dressing room door as Marie turned, nearly startled by it. "Can I come in, Marie?" Jeanette's voice still had its excited edge. Marie smiled, yelling back to her, "In a moment!"
She quickly changed back into her 'street clothes,' hanging up her costume. She wrapped a scarf around her neck before reaching for the door. Her hand froze mid-air, a few inches away from the knob.
She was staring down at her vanity dresser that was overloaded with the majority of the gifts. There was one that stood out more than the others…
An apple…
Marie stared at it, the red skin glinting off the lights. She picked it up, wondering if she herself had left it there, what with all the extras she had. But she found a note under it. Her heart twisted with a mixture of delight and confusion as she nearly dropped the apple, picking up the note hurriedly. She recognized Carlisle's handwriting as her heart thudded faster.
Marie,
I just had to write this note to you to tell you how amazing you were tonight. I was able to get out of the hospital in time to see you on stage- your presence was particularly overwhelming. You were indeed in character. I brought you this apple for two reasons. 1) I wasn't sure if you had enough,
Marie could've heard him laughing his wonderful laugh as her heart lifted even farther into the air.
And 2) I know you've heard the phrase, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away." Maybe that's why you keep giving me apples…maybe you're trying to keep me away.
Marie's very soul lurched and rejected this thought, dismissing this comment as a joke, not as something that she should be taking seriously.
I understand your reasoning behind this, and agree completely. I grew to know you very well those nights while you were in the hospital, and I know you are a very compassionate woman. I only wish what I was writing didn't have to be true, but we cannot change what we are, Marie. You will remain an actress, and I a doctor. We both know our paths are very different…and I know you will be leaving very soon with your troupe to Venice.
She froze, her very fingers stuck like ice to the paper. She couldn't stop reading, but wished she could yell at the paper that this wasn't true anymore…
I accept this, and wish I could continue to see you perform. I have greatly enjoyed your shows and watching your talents grow. However, I understand your want to keep me away. You wish to keep me away from you to stop from harming either of us by your leaving.
Marie couldn't help but smile bitterly, eyes starting to well with tears. She couldn't help but admire Carlisle's selflessness and empathy towards people. Marie admitted silently that she had been leaving the apples exactly for this reason. She knew Carlisle would get the analogy because of his obvious intelligence.
I cannot help but smile at your bravery through your hardships, Marie. I know you do not want to leave, but you must to pursue your dreams. And, as I write this with a quivering hand and swelling eyes, I must also say goodbye. I am also leaving to pursue my dreams. I was offered a job at a hospital in Columbus, Ohio and I am leaving. The hospital has already hired someone to replace me, a new intern. I am pleased that they are not telling me that I must stay here, because I know this new opportunity in Ohio is just as important as you leaving for Venice. I will miss you, Marie. Every bit of you. Take care of yourself and try not to fall off any more stages in Venice. I will, unfortunately, be too far away to come assist you the next time…
Your friend,
Carlisle Cullen
Marie was more frozen than before. She would've felt just like Carlisle if she 'd been able to move.
"Marie…?"
She did not hear Jeanette's quiet calls at her dressing room door. Marie walked slowly to it, dropping the note as it floated to the floor with the same grace that Carlisle always walked with.
Carlisle…
Marie was running now, ignoring Jeanette's calls of fright and anger as she pushed the door in her pale face. She sprinted, as fast as her small legs would take her, wondering how he would be getting all the way to America…
She weaved through the crowds, panting and gulping, trying to save some energy for when she actually saw him. The crowds were oddly large for this time of night; they seemed to be placed strategically so Marie couldn't get by. She forced her way through, finally reaching the center of the crowd. She suddenly realized they were all people from the hospital who had come to see Carlisle off. Marie could not see his carriage anywhere. She ran, gasping now to one of the other doctors.
"W-which way d-did he go…?!" She choked out as the doctor looked down at her incredulously.
"Carlisle left about ten minutes ago…He set off down that road," The man gestured to a large road to his left. Marie didn't wait. She sprinted off again, scarf billowing out behind her. She couldn't breathe, but she had to find him, tell him that she wasn't leaving. She didn't have to keep him away anymore by giving him apples…
Snow was falling lightly, dancing about Marie's eyes as if trying to distract her. She shivered against the cold despite all her running, watching her breath shoot out in front of her as if egging her on, faster and faster…
She looked down and could see the carriage tracks in the small amount of snow that was left on the cobblestones from earlier that day. She knew she was following the right path, but how much longer would it be? Marie knew she was about to collapse, and the knowledge that Carlisle had left ten minutes before her was an unfair head start…
Marie's steps were slowing, but her conscious mind did not notice. She was jogging now, slower and slower, but as she squinted through the snow, she could see something up ahead. It was black, ominous, and being pulled by two chocolate brown horses.
The carriage.
"Carlisle!" It was only a wheeze that came from Marie's mouth. She forced her feet to keep walking as the snow fell harder. The carriage was moving again and Marie couldn't stop it.
"Carlisle!" This call had no volume whatsoever. She wouldn't have been able to hear it herself if not for her mind screaming the doctor's name. She was reaching out a hand to the carriage, wishing to have the ability to stop it. Her feet were dragging against the cobblestone as the black carriage disappeared in the swirling snow.
Marie fell to her knees, one hand still reaching after the carriage as the sound of the horses' hooves echoed off the walls, away from Marie, Carlisle leaving with them…
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I did not have the strength or the courage to approach her that day. The only reason I was even there was because the Volturi had called me back, once more asking if I'd join their group. I declined, as usual, and decided to visit some of my old 'haunts' as I called them…
The town was eerily the same as I walked through the cobblestone streets, watching people shudder against the snow, for once glad I could not feel. I approached the hospital, smiling faintly as I noted each familiar point and detail about it. I moved on slowly, wondering if I could come back to this simple town. I knew I couldn't, however. I had been in America too many years and to not look like I'd aged a day was definitely too suspicious.
I stopped dead in my tracks when I walked past the theatre. Posters were up for the new show and I saw the name I hadn't heard in so long…
Marie Llewellyn…
I wondered if the troupe had gone to Venice but had come back here out of sympathy for the town. I approached the poster slowly, each step weighed with memories. I touched it gingerly, my hand matching the snow that was softly falling. I traced my fingers over her name, noting the time her performance started.
The cheers seemed to wash over me like a wave of guilt. They were softer than I'd remembered the night when I had left for Ohio. I did not stand for Marie as I had every other time I had seen her perform out of fear she would see me. It was nearly frightening to see her the way she was…
Her deep brown eyes reflected none of what they used to hold for me, none of the laughter, the hope, and the empathy. Her matching chocolate hair was streaked with grey and I knew it was not the makeup she was forced to wear for the show. I recounted how many years I had not been in this town and nearly gasped aloud when I realized it…
It had been 24 years…
24 years of her life was gone while I stayed the same. She was must've been 48 or so…I could not believe it and it gave me all the more reason to not go up to see her. I walked out of the theater silently, listening nonchalantly to the different conversations of the passerby's.
I could not believe what they had been saying. Marie and her troupe had stayed in this town, without moving once, for those 24 years. I also overheard some people asking questions about her. I listened to these more intently than others, wishing to know how she was doing, what had happened while I was gone, and if she was the Marie I knew so well…
I wanted to scream out loud as I leaned casually against the theater wall. My heart squirmed uncomfortably at every word they had said. The conversations consisted of little blurbs about her, how she was living now (poorly), her health, which had apparently gone downhill, and how her acting skills had mostly deteriorated. I shook my head motionlessly, kicking off against the wall, stomping off down the street. It was highly unlike myself to behave like this, and knew I would have to calm down before I got back home to Esme. I passed one last couple and stopped in the middle of the street, snow swirling around my black trench coat from my abrupt pause.
"I heard the only reason she started going downhill was because of that Cullen man who moved…"
I had heard enough, my mind now flooding with guilt and sadness more so than anger. It had been my fault…my fault she had grown so cold, distant…
…Different…
I wanted so badly to go up to her and say I was back, that I wouldn't leave her again…that I was sorry…my eyes stayed on the cobblestone as I walked, my face twisting into pain and guilt with every step I took. I knew I could not tell her or see her, though…there was only one thing I could do…
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Marie sighed, leaning against her dressing room wall, noting the substantial loss in flowers from this evening. She slowly removed her costume, changing into her regular clothes again. She wrapped her scarf around her neck, thinking about retirement and how it would affect her…
Marie scooped her hand down to pick up her purse from off the vanity, eyes blank as she heard Jeanette at the door. She called out that she was coming, her voice distant and cold. Marie took a step towards the door and stopped, hand frozen an inch or so from the knob, knowing this situation seemed all too familiar…
There was a gift on the vanity's worn, wooden surface that caught her eye. It sat there, glinting pleasantly off the light from the vanity, red skin looking all too warm for the season.
An apple…
Marie lifted it up, and, for the first time in a long while, her eyes showed curiosity and sadness. She looked down almost frantically to her vanity table and spotted the thing she had wanted to see more than the apple…a small piece of paper with her name on it, written in the handwriting she hadn't seen in years.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away…
Even if this doctor does not want to stay away…
C.C.
That was what the entire note said. Marie's eyes welled with tears as she pocketed it quickly, holding the apple in one hand. She clicked the lights off in her dressing room, trying to look normal for Jeanette. Marie walked down the narrow cobblestone alley, turning her head quickly, thinking she saw something in the corner of her eye. She shrugged it off, taking out the note again and vowing never to lose it…
Carlisle stared after Marie, a small smile on his face. "Be safe…my love…" He whispered to the soft breeze that blew the snow across his white cheeks. A moment later, he was gone, running down the opposite alley toward the carriages that would take him to his family, back to his home, but his mind was elsewhere as the horses took off down the lane.
Carlisle stared out the window, thinking all the while of Marie, Italy, dreams, fate, and apples, wondering himself if they really could keep this doctor away…