Chapter 1: Paint, nuts, and Party Plans
"DAMMIT!" Said Zidane as his ladder fell for the third time. "I thought I told you to hold the damn thing!" "Sorry, Ziddy." said Blank, stifling a laughing fit. The sight of Zidane with the can of yellow paint over his head like goldilocks with a silver pillbox hat and a bad dye job was almost too much for him. They were painting the house that warm sunny day. It was one of those hot, lazy summer days that you thought would never end, and to kill the boredom that threatened to rot their brains into mush, Zidane, Vivi, and Blank were all painting the hideout a color of yellow so cheerful it would make Kate Hudson throw up. Vivi was out back Getting some more paint, (They wouldn't let him go up the ladder after last year's house painting incident) Because they had run out when Blank let go of the ladder to stare at a naked sunbather over in someone's yard. Zidane glared at his friend. "I also told you to quit calling me Ziddy! It sounds like a brand of cheap pasta!" Blank raised an eyebrow. "Whatsa matter with you? Man, you're acting like Mike Tyson with a bad case of hemmorhoids." "How do you even know who he is? that guy doesn't live in our world!" Blank beamed. "I got something called a 'TV'. I can view mirages right in my own living room, even the ones from other worlds! They call them 'Shows'" "You're so lucky! Do you get Starz?" "No, that costs extra. But I have Cartoon Network! A cartoon is a moving drawing." "This I gotta see, B.!" Blank gave him a look. "Don't call me B. It sounds like a girl name." Zidane gave him a smug look. "Only if YOU stop calling me 'Ziddy'" "It's a deal" said blank, and they shook hands, until Blank stumbled and fell on Zidane..... Just as Vivi came back. "What the..." said Vivi, temporarily losing his stutter. "Um....... Wanna watch Cartoons?" said Zidane. "I-if it will get me a-away from this s-s-smut. E-even though I-i have no i-idea what a c- cartoon is."
"There's only one way to solve this, Vegeta!" said Goku. "That's right." said Vegeta. "WEST SIDE STORY-STYLE DANCE-OFF!!!" And the match was on.ViVi was watching intently. "I wish I could dance like that." (AN.: Read my DBZ story, "Dragonball Z Spirited Away" Its cool.)" Blank puffed out his chest. "I can pole dance!!" ViVi and Zidane scooted away from him. On screen, Vegeta was severly intimidated by Goku's fancy moves, and begged for his life. ViVi stood up in his seat. "You kill that bastard, Goku!" Blank and Zidane stared wide-eyes at their little friend. "Where did you learn to talk like that Vee?" Vivi shrank back, nervous. "F- From you, Zidane-kun." Zidane blushed. "I...well, don't repeat anything I say. I'm a big potty mouth." Vivi glared. "You don't hafta use baby talk with me, I am 10 years old!!" "I thought you were nine!" Vivi glowed as brightly as a young wizard with joly-black skin could possibly glow. "My tenth birthday is coming up! I'm gonna be the big one o!!" Blank and Zidane gigged. Vivi cleared his throat and watched the T.V. Cinna walked in with groceries. "Does anyone was some mixed nuts?" Vivi shook his head. "Nah, when I eat nuts, my tounge itches." He was trying not to laugh. Zidane had to try. "Can you let me have on of your fabulous nuts?" He and Vivi were quivering with pent-up laughter. Cinna threw him a walnut. Blank smirked. "Its an awfully big nut but I woulden't taste it because it's all wrinkly." "Yeh." said Zidane. They were about to pee themselves they were holding in so much laughter. Cinna sniffled. "Is there anyone in this world who will eat my nuts?!"Needless to say, Vivi, Zidane and Blank lost it all right there. Vivi had tears rolling, Zidane nearly swallowed his tounge and Blank peed his pants. Cinna looked around. "Why is everyone laughi-" Suddenly, he got it. "You guys are asses." He said, as he left the room in a huff. After everyone stopped laughing, Zidane turned to Vivi. "When are you having your party, Vee?" Vivi beamed. "I want a surprise party." Zidane noticed that he didn't stutter when he was happy. Blank just had to blow his own horn. "It's not a surprise if you kno-" "SHUT UP!!" said Zidane. Then he turned to Vivi. "We'll throw you the best surprise party ever!" "Even if it isn't a sur-" "Didn't I tell you to shut up?" said Zidane to Blank, and he knocked him through the wall.
Zidane, Steiner, Garnet, Amarant, Eiko, Freya, and Quina were all planning the party. Ganret was writing a list of things thye'd need. "Okay, First item, a cake." She turned to Quina. "You have to cook one for EVERYONE, not just one person. I know Vivi likes that chocolate-chocolate chip stuff." Zidane piped up. "I like Mocha!" Steiner didn't want to be left out. "I like yellow.""Sprinkles!!" said Eiko. "I want Strawberry!" said Amarant. Freya added that to the list. "I enjoy dark chocolate with mint chocolate chip!!" Garnet said. "Frogs!" said Quina. Everyone sweatdropped. Garnet crossed out "Cake" "Next item, Presents!!" Steiner holds out a card. "I have a free stuff cleaning/polishing card good at 'Phil's staff wands and crap like that.'" Garnet counted the contents of her purse. "How does 10,000 gil sound?" Quina held up a pot and pan. "I could cook him something!!" Zidane held out a crowbar lovingly. "I could use 'Mr. Whacky' to steal him a toy!!" Freya looked at her halberd. "I could get him a puppy." Eiko held a needle and thread. "I can make him a new jacket!" Amarant had knives. "I could teach him how to deal with anger!!" Everyone looked around nervously. "I think maybe it should be more of a material thing." said Garnet. Amarant nodded. As Garnet crossed off "Presents," She got to the third item. "Third, decorations." She looked up. "We could have streamers and balloons." "WITH LOTS OF RAUNCHY POSTERS!!!" said Zidane. Garnet paused. "Let's move on to 'food'." Amarant brightened. "How about a few cases of Crown Royal?" "AT A CHILD'S PARTY?" yelled Garnet. "I mean for us." said Amarant. "Since we're all adults except Eiko, she's too young." Eiko sulked. Zidane smiled. "We could have lots of shrimp, clams, mussels and oyesters!!" "And Steak Au Tartar!" said Garnet. (AN: Steak Au Tartar is raw meat) "Pufferfish!"Yelled Stiener. "Let's have Hollandaise!" Said Quina. (AN Hollandaise is raw egg sauce) Freya thought for a moment. "We could let him try some plankton!" Eiko was beaming. "I can cook my 7 and a half alarm chili for him! Everyone cheered. "Next item, Invitees" said Garnet. "Let's see...... Us........" "The other Knights of Pluto......" "Cinna, Blank, Marcus, and Baku......." "Mog....." "Ruby" Garnet clapped her hans together. "Okay, we're done." And with that, everyoner retired to their houses for the night.
"DAMMIT!" Said Zidane as his ladder fell for the third time. "I thought I told you to hold the damn thing!" "Sorry, Ziddy." said Blank, stifling a laughing fit. The sight of Zidane with the can of yellow paint over his head like goldilocks with a silver pillbox hat and a bad dye job was almost too much for him. They were painting the house that warm sunny day. It was one of those hot, lazy summer days that you thought would never end, and to kill the boredom that threatened to rot their brains into mush, Zidane, Vivi, and Blank were all painting the hideout a color of yellow so cheerful it would make Kate Hudson throw up. Vivi was out back Getting some more paint, (They wouldn't let him go up the ladder after last year's house painting incident) Because they had run out when Blank let go of the ladder to stare at a naked sunbather over in someone's yard. Zidane glared at his friend. "I also told you to quit calling me Ziddy! It sounds like a brand of cheap pasta!" Blank raised an eyebrow. "Whatsa matter with you? Man, you're acting like Mike Tyson with a bad case of hemmorhoids." "How do you even know who he is? that guy doesn't live in our world!" Blank beamed. "I got something called a 'TV'. I can view mirages right in my own living room, even the ones from other worlds! They call them 'Shows'" "You're so lucky! Do you get Starz?" "No, that costs extra. But I have Cartoon Network! A cartoon is a moving drawing." "This I gotta see, B.!" Blank gave him a look. "Don't call me B. It sounds like a girl name." Zidane gave him a smug look. "Only if YOU stop calling me 'Ziddy'" "It's a deal" said blank, and they shook hands, until Blank stumbled and fell on Zidane..... Just as Vivi came back. "What the..." said Vivi, temporarily losing his stutter. "Um....... Wanna watch Cartoons?" said Zidane. "I-if it will get me a-away from this s-s-smut. E-even though I-i have no i-idea what a c- cartoon is."
"There's only one way to solve this, Vegeta!" said Goku. "That's right." said Vegeta. "WEST SIDE STORY-STYLE DANCE-OFF!!!" And the match was on.ViVi was watching intently. "I wish I could dance like that." (AN.: Read my DBZ story, "Dragonball Z Spirited Away" Its cool.)" Blank puffed out his chest. "I can pole dance!!" ViVi and Zidane scooted away from him. On screen, Vegeta was severly intimidated by Goku's fancy moves, and begged for his life. ViVi stood up in his seat. "You kill that bastard, Goku!" Blank and Zidane stared wide-eyes at their little friend. "Where did you learn to talk like that Vee?" Vivi shrank back, nervous. "F- From you, Zidane-kun." Zidane blushed. "I...well, don't repeat anything I say. I'm a big potty mouth." Vivi glared. "You don't hafta use baby talk with me, I am 10 years old!!" "I thought you were nine!" Vivi glowed as brightly as a young wizard with joly-black skin could possibly glow. "My tenth birthday is coming up! I'm gonna be the big one o!!" Blank and Zidane gigged. Vivi cleared his throat and watched the T.V. Cinna walked in with groceries. "Does anyone was some mixed nuts?" Vivi shook his head. "Nah, when I eat nuts, my tounge itches." He was trying not to laugh. Zidane had to try. "Can you let me have on of your fabulous nuts?" He and Vivi were quivering with pent-up laughter. Cinna threw him a walnut. Blank smirked. "Its an awfully big nut but I woulden't taste it because it's all wrinkly." "Yeh." said Zidane. They were about to pee themselves they were holding in so much laughter. Cinna sniffled. "Is there anyone in this world who will eat my nuts?!"Needless to say, Vivi, Zidane and Blank lost it all right there. Vivi had tears rolling, Zidane nearly swallowed his tounge and Blank peed his pants. Cinna looked around. "Why is everyone laughi-" Suddenly, he got it. "You guys are asses." He said, as he left the room in a huff. After everyone stopped laughing, Zidane turned to Vivi. "When are you having your party, Vee?" Vivi beamed. "I want a surprise party." Zidane noticed that he didn't stutter when he was happy. Blank just had to blow his own horn. "It's not a surprise if you kno-" "SHUT UP!!" said Zidane. Then he turned to Vivi. "We'll throw you the best surprise party ever!" "Even if it isn't a sur-" "Didn't I tell you to shut up?" said Zidane to Blank, and he knocked him through the wall.
Zidane, Steiner, Garnet, Amarant, Eiko, Freya, and Quina were all planning the party. Ganret was writing a list of things thye'd need. "Okay, First item, a cake." She turned to Quina. "You have to cook one for EVERYONE, not just one person. I know Vivi likes that chocolate-chocolate chip stuff." Zidane piped up. "I like Mocha!" Steiner didn't want to be left out. "I like yellow.""Sprinkles!!" said Eiko. "I want Strawberry!" said Amarant. Freya added that to the list. "I enjoy dark chocolate with mint chocolate chip!!" Garnet said. "Frogs!" said Quina. Everyone sweatdropped. Garnet crossed out "Cake" "Next item, Presents!!" Steiner holds out a card. "I have a free stuff cleaning/polishing card good at 'Phil's staff wands and crap like that.'" Garnet counted the contents of her purse. "How does 10,000 gil sound?" Quina held up a pot and pan. "I could cook him something!!" Zidane held out a crowbar lovingly. "I could use 'Mr. Whacky' to steal him a toy!!" Freya looked at her halberd. "I could get him a puppy." Eiko held a needle and thread. "I can make him a new jacket!" Amarant had knives. "I could teach him how to deal with anger!!" Everyone looked around nervously. "I think maybe it should be more of a material thing." said Garnet. Amarant nodded. As Garnet crossed off "Presents," She got to the third item. "Third, decorations." She looked up. "We could have streamers and balloons." "WITH LOTS OF RAUNCHY POSTERS!!!" said Zidane. Garnet paused. "Let's move on to 'food'." Amarant brightened. "How about a few cases of Crown Royal?" "AT A CHILD'S PARTY?" yelled Garnet. "I mean for us." said Amarant. "Since we're all adults except Eiko, she's too young." Eiko sulked. Zidane smiled. "We could have lots of shrimp, clams, mussels and oyesters!!" "And Steak Au Tartar!" said Garnet. (AN: Steak Au Tartar is raw meat) "Pufferfish!"Yelled Stiener. "Let's have Hollandaise!" Said Quina. (AN Hollandaise is raw egg sauce) Freya thought for a moment. "We could let him try some plankton!" Eiko was beaming. "I can cook my 7 and a half alarm chili for him! Everyone cheered. "Next item, Invitees" said Garnet. "Let's see...... Us........" "The other Knights of Pluto......" "Cinna, Blank, Marcus, and Baku......." "Mog....." "Ruby" Garnet clapped her hans together. "Okay, we're done." And with that, everyoner retired to their houses for the night.