Behind These Hazel Eyes - James/Logan - Rated T - extreme sadness if anything.
A/N:Yeah, uh, don't ask why I wrote this. I just want to put my OTP through shit I guess. but uh, I wanted to write a one shot, and then this song came on the radio, and my first thought was having James - because he has the hazel eyes - being heart broken because he lost his bby/wifey. I'm just throwing this out there, but James is not the girl in the relationship. He never has been in my stories, and he never will be. Just sayin'.
Anyways, I hope you like it :)
Seems just like yesterday, you were a part of me. I used to stand so tall, I used to be so strong.
James lied in his bed, eyes closed, as the one he loved haunts his thoughts.
You're arms around me tight, everything, it felt so right, unbreakable, like nothing could go wrong.
He'd always been the strong one, the one who… the one who was depended on. He'd never really cried in his entire life. He'd always been more of a man than that. But what was a man without his one true love?
Now, I can't breathe, no I can't sleep. I'm barely hanging on.
James hadn't slept in months. Every time sleep did capture him though, he'd either have a bad dream of what happened, or a good dream of what could have been. Either way he'd wake up, tears in his eyes, soul seemingly empty. Life plain, meaningless.
Here I am, once again. I'm torn into pieces. Can't deny it, can't pretend. I thought you were the one.
Ever since he'd let Logan slip from his grasp, his whole world was slowly fading. He couldn't even come to grips with what happened. It just… happened.
Broken up, deep inside, but you won't see the tears I cry… behind these hazel eyes.
James seemingly didn't care. Well, he cared more than he wished to. He wished that he didn't care. He didn't want to. He didn't need to. He wanted to make himself believe that he didn't need Logan to move on. But that was near impossible. Because it was a lie. He needed Logan like he needed the air to breathe, and without him, he was slowly suffocating.
I told you everything, opened up and let you in. You made me feel right for once in my life.
James had never had someone accept him the way Logan did. His mother disapproved of everything he did. He didn't have a dad. He only had Logan, and Logan was all he needed. Logan was his lifeline. Logan accepted everything he did, just like any boyfriend would, right? No, not right. Logan accepted everything, even things any sane person wouldn't. And that's what James loved about him. He made him feel like a better person, even though he knew he wasn't.
Now all that's left of me, is what I pretend to be. So together, but so broken up inside.
Of course, being James Diamond, he'd never in his life let on that he was hurting inside. No way. But for once in his life, he wished he did, because of that first time he'd seen Logan again…
'Cause I can't breathe, no I can't sleep, I'm barely hanging on.
Logan was a mess, he'd shown it very well, but James masked his emptiness. And when he'd seen Logan again, Logan thought he'd moved on. He thought that James didn't need him anymore. Logan just turned around, and walked away. He had texted James a few times before that, but afterwards, James received nothing. Which made him feel angry, if anything.
Swallow me, then spit me out. For hating you, I blame myself. Seeing you, it kills me now. No, I don't cry on the outside, anymore…
After that, James had shown no emotion, whatsoever. He was just… empty. He was hollow. And without Logan, he was nothing.
Here I am, once again, I'm torn into pieces…
And now, James lie in bed, eyes shut, over thinking everything he had with Logan. I small smile graced his lips, though tears stung his eyes.
Can't deny it, can't pretend. I thought you were the one. Broken up, deep inside…
He missed Logan. He missed him so much, his heart literally ached. He'd never felt this before. Not until now anyways. He learned months ago that he'd never stop missing Logan. Not now, not ever.
But you won't get to see the tears I cry, behind these hazel eyes…
Hope you all like this! Please remember to drop a review. I love the favorites, but I'd like you to tell me how you felt about this, if you will. Thank you for reading :)