Authors Notes: This is a short Meiling fic reflecting on her
life. I have no idea where this came from since I don't even like Meiling much.
But it was just a spur of the moment kind of thing. And there aren't many
Meiling fics out there so I thought I'd give a shot at it. I'm not sure if I'm
just gonna leave it there. It depends on if I get any more ideas. Well enjoy.
The Life I Always Dreamed Of
A woman with long dark black hair
sat on a stool. She sighed running her finger along the top of her now empty
glass. She had lost count to how many drinks her body have acquired. Certainly
more than enough to give her a killer hang over in the morning. Though she paid
no heed to that as she waved the bar tender down.
"Another one." She stated.
"I think you've had enough." The man said softly smelling the scent of
alcohol on her breath. Meiling looked up anger over coming her features. At any
other time she might consider the man cute. With his blonde spiked up hair and
dazzling blue eyes. A real heart breaker she could tell. But at the moment none
of that matter. She had money and would pay for every drink she got. How dare he
refuse her.
"Alright fine one more but that's it then I'll call a cab for you." The
man replied seeing her determined look. He poured another drink for her and
handed it over. She paid no more attention to him as she poured the liquor into
her mouth.
"Don't bother." She muttered pushing away the empty glass. "There's no
where a cab can take me."
"Don't you have a home?" He questioned. In his time he had seen many
people in and out and heard many of their problems. By the way she was dressed
he could tell she was different. Highly expensive cloths not the type of girl
you would imagine here. Any man would be more than lucky to have her.
"Oh of course I do. Infact I have a mansion and I'm married to the
richest man in
China." She
laughed bitterly.
"Tough life." He commented dryly although knowing those couldn't be the
reasons for her distress
"And I'm deeply in love with him as well." She sighed softly. "Infact I
have been since I could walk. He's always been everything to me."
"Than what's the problem?" The bar tender questioned.
"Well first off he never really wanted to marry me…. His clan and I made
him. Every time I look at myself in the mirror I hate the person I see even
more. I destroyed his life, destroyed his happiness…. And the sad thing is I'm
not even happy myself." Meiling explained tears glistened her eyes. She had
originally thought that if perhaps she could make him forget about Sakura he
would learn to love her. Though no matter what there was no way to make him
forget her, it was impossible. She knew they where true soul mates she just
couldn't admit it to herself.
"You see he's in love with this girl in
Japan. At first
glance I knew she was different. The way he acted around her… was different. And
that scared me so I was hostile to her. Despite that she still wanted to be my
friend. God dammit I want to hate her so much!! I mean she has ruined my life!
Syaoran's not happy! I'm not happy! It's all her fault!" Meiling exclaimed
letting the tears flow down her flushed cheeks. "But no matter what I can't
blame her…. She's not guilty to any crime except the same one as I… and that's
falling in love with Syaoran. The only difference was she cared about his
happiness. Despite wanting him to stay with her in
Japan, which I
know for a fact she did, she left him go. At first I thought she was stupid! I
mean she let the best thing in her life slip away from her. In the end though I
realize that she doesn't want him to be with her if he doesn't want to be. That
if he was actually in love with me she would accept it!" Meiling cried her heart
out for the first time in a long time. Forever she had been trying to hide the
pain that she was feeling. But there is only so much a person can hold in.
The bar tendered stared at the young crying girl infront of him. She was
only 21 far too young to be feeling this pain. A lot of stories had been told to
him about hardships in people's lives, but this was by far a sad painful one.
"Well he's stupid for not loving a beautiful girl like you… stupid I tell
you… any man would be lucky to have you." The man said soothingly trying to
cheer her up. He honestly hated to see people cry.
"No he's smart…. I'm a selfish brat." She muttered whipping her eyes.
Though new tears just replaced the old.
"I see a smart wonderful young woman who has a chance at the world
infront of me. But I can tell you that nothing is going to come out of this
marriage. You said yourself that neither he nor you are happy. I know this may
hurt but I believe you need to let him go so you can enjoy life once again. This
may be hard to accept but there is someone else out there that will love you
more than life itself."
"I don't know how…. We haven't spoken about this… but I know it's on both
our minds." Meiling stated unsuringly. She honestly didn't want to let go of
Syaoran, but this wasn't healthy for either of them. And for once she decided
she wanted to do the right thing. Try and rebuild the innocent good person she
had once been.
"It will be tough but you have to talk to him." The blonde bartender
replied forcefully. "Now how about that cab?"
Meiling nodded knowing she had to go home sometime. She didn't want to
worry Syaoran. Although he didn't love her as a lover she knew he did as a
little sister. She should be thankful for that much.
After a few minutes the sound of a horn was heard outside. She glanced to
the blonde man and he nodded for her to go ahead. Meiling got up and headed for
the door stumbling a bit. She turned around to say her thanks to the man. A
total stranger had helped her sort out a lot of things. Meiling was astonished
to find that the bartender was no where in sight. She walked back over to the
bar but still saw no sign of the blonde man.
"Can I get you anything?" A black haired bartender asked. She shook her
head going back to the door.
"I must be going crazy." She muttered entering the cab. This was proof
that he had been there though, after all he had called the cab for her. Or was
it the effect of the alcohol that flowed in her blood. She sighed her head
pounding to badly to even care anymore. She told the driver where to go and he
headed off. After a short fifteen minute ride she was standing infront of the Li
Manor.
"This is it Meiling now or never." She stated opening the front door and
walking in.
"Where have you been?!? It's past 3:00
am!" Syaoran exclaimed immediately as the door opened.
"Didn't know you cared so much." She muttered walking over to the couch.
"Of course I care I'm your husband!" Syaoran shot back sitting down next
to her. He honestly didn't know why she insisted on making him worry all the
time. "You've been drinking again." Syaoran commented noticing the smell of
alcohol on her breath.
"Syaoran…. We we need to talk." Meiling whispered softly letting a tear
slide down her cheek. Syaoran whipped away the tear sighing. He knew this would
have to be talked about sooner or later. He wasn't happy and he was pretty sure
Meiling wasn't either. He hated that he couldn't love her like she wanted. Make
her happy and give her a good life. His heart belonged to another and as long as
he lived it would always be there. It wasn't fair to Meiling but he didn't want
to break her heart either. But what could be done?
"I know." Syaoran whispered back bowing his head sadly.
~~LeoAngel~~
