This is my first La corda fic, third fic on . Taken from chapter of the manga and added a little twist of my own. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own La corda d'Oro or its characters.
~Left Behind~
"Don't go."
His eyes widened when he heard those words escape her lips.
"Don't go…?" He tasted the words himself, eyebrows furrowed.
But why? It wasn't like she could stop him, right? Going abroad to study could be a great opportunity for him to widen his world of music and for him to experience a whole new diversity of different genres. He could even express his music to the world through his violin, not that he actually cared who listened.
Yet, why did his heart hurt so much?
Walking towards a nearby bench, he sat down. Questions engulfed his thoughts, each one pulling him deeper and deeper into a world of uncertainty. Why was he starting to feel… regret? Staring at the floor, hands clasped together, he tried to redeem himself out of his dilemma. But it was all in vain.
"Tsukimori-kun? Are you alright?"
Len looked up at the red haired girl before him. Moonlight shone on her, giving her face a glow he never knew she had. Her wild tousled hair framed her face, bringing out her bright golden eyes, which only held worry for him. For a brief moment, he saw a flash of despair in them, causing his eyebrows to furrow once again.
Her sleeveless dress flowed down her body, hugging her curves, while patterns of maroon roses were imprinted on the pale pink cloth, giving her a sweet innocent look. A white bolero covered her shoulders, barely shielding them from the cold night breeze as it blew past. She must be cold. He thought dryly. Her hands were crossed in front of her chest, depicting the worry that shook inside her body.
That damn worry.
The hem of her dress flew above her knees, which lead to her feet enclosed in a pair of high-heeled shoes that matched the colour of her dress. They briefly hid the plasters he had put on her blisters just moments ago. Shouldn't she feel uncomfortable standing? Closing his eyes, he sighed and patted the empty space next to him.
She scrutinized his face for a moment, before joining him on the bench, eyes still filled with worry while watching his every move.
"Tsukimori-kun? What's wrong?"
He shook his head once, eyes still shut, then once more to ensure her that he was fine. He could feel the ends of his mouth start to twitch upwards but he held them down.
It was funny, how much she worried about him, cared about him. Yet, this was her character, she showed kindness to everyone, even that guy, Len thought bitterly. He noticed how her eyes continued to shine with that damn worry, and he almost wanted to laugh out loud. Don't go? He repeated in his head. Was she like some sort of puppy who didn't wanted her master to leave? He could've sworn he had started laughing. It was funny. It was hysterical…
It was heartbreaking.
Have you ever thought about why you do not want to tell Hino about your studying abroad?
That guy's voice rang through his head. That question… the answer to it? He didn't know. His thoughts had been jumbled up for quite some time now, and that same damn question kept entering his mind. What was it to him anyway?
I like Hino.
Len had called the emerald haired pianist "foolish" then, before turning away. He remembered how he had frowned, confused by the very fact that his heart had hurt so much just listening to that single sentence.
He glanced up again, realizing that the girl beside him had been quiet for some time now. Her face was flushed a pretty pink, due to the cold, no doubt, and her eyes were no longer on him. Instead, she was mimicking his previous expression: staring at the floor, frowning. The despair in her eyes, once just a flash, had taken over, reaching into the depths of her two golden orbs. Her ends of her mouth were turned down, her face scrunched up as if she was concentrating hard on something.
"Hino."
Her name reached his lips. She looked up, the despair disappearing momentarily and worry replacing it once again. He turned away, not wanting to see her with this expression on her face. It would only be more difficult to let go. But there was a burning question in his head, and it threatened to spill out any moment…
"Would you continue to play the violin?"
Confusion crossed her face. "Of course, Tsukimori-kun. Why would I stop?" she asked, head cocking to one side.
She wasn't going to stop. The thought caused his shoulders to slump – he didn't know when they had become rigid – as relief washed over him. He wouldn't know what to do if he never heard her music again. She, the girl before him, had opened up his world of music, made him realize that beautiful music did not only rely on skill, but feelings as well. She had shown him that his music could be gentle – like his parents' – and how soothing the tune from the violin could be.
He remembered how charmed he was by her music that night – he on the balcony of Fuyuumi-chan's villa and she on a grass patch that seemed to light up under the moonlight. How she had played her violin, how it prompted him, and how it made him submit to its song. He remembered him picking up his own violin, hypnotized by the notes drifting in the air, as he harmonized with her, producing a melody he had never dreamed of hearing before.
The Ave Maria.
Sighing as he ended that memory, he put his hands on his knees as he proceeded to stand up. "We should go," he stated, starting to walk off. The girl stood up, but she didn't budge.
"Hino?" Len turned around, wondering why she wasn't moving. Then he stopped.
Tears. Fresh tears had welled up in her eyes and they were falling freely down her ghostly cheeks. Sobs shook her entire body uncontrollably and her hands moved up to her face, trying to silence them.
Len just stood there, watching her cry. He had seen those tears before, back when she had wanted to give up the violin. How they spoke what her lips didn't, and what her heart did. Those tears, they were real…
And now, he was the one who caused them.
Hesitantly, he took a step towards her, then another and another. Soon, he was standing less than a feet in front of her, his face void of emotion as he stared at her shaking figure. She noticed him in front of her, and her sobs only grew louder.
"Don't go… Tsukimori-kun… Don't leave me…"
She looked up at him, as if she could see through his expressionless façade. Her glassy eyes, brimmed with tears, never moved off him. Grief, remorse, anguish and even desperation could be seen in them, and Len found it hard to look away. This time, he knew, those tears falling, they reflected what her heart wanted, and it was as if they were crying out to him, begging him to stay.
Moments passed, and the two just stood there, in the middle of a park facing a river that glistened in the moonlight: one, in a mess of desperation, and the other, stoic, giving off an unapproachable aura. So different they were, yet neither could look away, both trying to etch every single detail of the other into their minds.
Slowly, Len reached out his hands and placed it on the girl's cheek. Using his thumb, he brushed away the tears that were escaping her eyes. Through narrowed eyes, he watched as her face flushed prettily and her golden orbs shifted, trying to avoid his intense gaze, before welling up again. Suddenly, she lunged at him, arms going around his torso, causing him to stumble a step back.
"H…Hino?" He voiced his shock, stammering in the process. He could feel her hands on his back as they gripped his shirt tightly, not wanting to let go. Her fiery hair tickled his neck and had the scent of raspberries. He shakily let out a breath that he never knew he was holding. His shirt was starting to get soaked from her tears, but he honestly didn't care. All he cared about was the girl crying in his arms and how much he wanted to ease the pain she was going through.
"Don't go…" He could hear her voice shaking, though his chest muffled it. "Stay here… with me… please…"
His heart broke at her plea, but he knew he couldn't fulfill it. He couldn't give her what she wanted. What was done was done. There was no way he could back out now. He wanted to hold her, put his arms around her, embrace her, anything to relieve her from the pain that he caused. His hands started moving on their own, reaching towards her shoulders…
He stopped.
He couldn't. He couldn't comfort her, he wasn't supposed to. It would only worsen the pain of letting go. Len knew that. He gritted his teeth, reluctantly lowering his arms and let them fall to his side. The girl seemed to notice this, and she flew back almost immediately. Her head was bowed and her face was a deep red, Streaks of tears stained her face as she straightened out her dress.
"I'm sorry, Tsukimori-kun. That was really out of hand. You were uncomfortable, and I didn't sense that. Silly me." She apologized, bonking her head with her fist. Len's eyes were once again fixed on her face. It held a strained smile that was out of place, considering the tears that were still falling from her eyes.
She shouldn't push herself to smile. He thought, desperately now. She really shouldn't, not because of this. He could feel his arms starting to embrace her again, but he held himself back, fists clenched. His heart ached so much to see her in this state, to see her crumple and break down before him. It wasn't supposed to end this way. She was supposed to be happy, or at least unaffected, by his leaving. She would have one less competitor, one less hindrance in her life. He wasn't supposed to mean anything to her. Yet, why? Why did she want him to stay so much?
"I love you, Len. Why can't you understand that?" She whispered, her voice barely audible.
But Len could hear her, every single word. His heart thumped wildly in his chest, a million questions burning in his head. Did she mean that? Does she really…? More than that pianist? He bit his tongue. No. This was bad. She wasn't supposed to love him, not now, not ever. She was supposed to have a happy life in Japan, a life without him. His heartbeat slowed, and slowly died away.
He stepped back, his face composed once again. Eyes hardened, he looked at the girl in front of him. And he said the inevitable.
"I'm sorry, Hino. I'm leaving."
The broken smile on her face froze, and her eyes turned blank. Len's eyes widened, and almost watered as he watched her take the blow. Tears no longer fell. She just stood there, as if frozen in time, before kneeling on the floor. Hands limp by her side, and head hung low, she looked like a puppet whose strings had been cut off, taking away the life in her.
Len turned around and started to walk off. He couldn't take it anymore. Her expression, it was too heartbreaking to watch. He knew she was broken, he knew she was devastated. But he knew, at least he thought he knew, that there was a chance that she may forget about it and move on. And that fueled his determination to depart from the tragic scene that he initiated.
"Goodbye, Hino." He whispered, not taking the risk of using his voice in fear that it might break.
He walked off, every step he took a torturous reminder of what he was leaving behind. The sobs that were slowly getting softer and softer with each step he took away from her made his heart break, piece by piece. His vision started to become blurry, his face, unable to hide behind his well-built mask of no emotion, scrunched up in agony. Choked sobs started to form in his throat, but he swallowed them down. He needed to get out of there before anyone saw his broken state. He broke into a run and left the park, his last memory of the girl he loved haunting his mind.
I love you. I'm sorry. Goodbye.
I'll never see you again.
Owari.
