Since one month Draco was going out with Pansy Parkinson. For a long time she was part of his clique and now they were together. It just happened. When they were on the train to Hogwarts for their sixth year she came to ask him out.

Of course he realised her affection for him much earlier but he never cared much about her. But at the end of their fifth year he became very aware of her actions. So at the start of term he accepted her bidding to be his girlfriend. They were first just holding hands, later snogging around, if he found time and was able to shut his fear away. Him becoming a Death Eater was the last thing he wanted, but he needed to take care of his family.

But to be honest, dating Parkinson wasn't really satisfying for him. He had never felt this so called wonderful feeling of having butterflies in his stomach neither he felt any tingling while being with her. No offence but he really didn't thought that this sort of feeling for someone even existed.

Soon, after a week or so she started to annoy him. She never was the cleverest person and it offended him much that she barely understood him. After this month Draco tried to studiously avoid her but he wasn't that successful. Blaise gave him a sceptical gaze. "If you don't like her, why keep her?" he asked out of interest, his voice full of amusement. The young man made a fun of Draco's inability to get along with the other gender. Draco sighed. "I don't know, mate." He was lost in his thoughts. "Seriously if you want to get rid of her, and obviously you want to, just break up. I don't even know why you said yes in the first place. I knew it would end like this." Zabini had a clear point of view and Draco knew that he was right. Though, he couldn't answer his question. Why for god's sake had he accepted her begging? "Maybe you're right. I'll end it."
"End what?" a high female voice asked, Draco's calm level fell rapidly when Pansy Parkinson came into sight, smiling a bright smile at him. "Nevermind." his voice was cold, his eyes looked right through her. Without thinking further about her question, she just shrugged her shoulders and finally sat next to Draco, leeched herself onto him. She came slowly nearer until her face was only inches away from his, still smiling. "I wondered.." she began, her voice full of relish. Parkinson's eyes tried to find hold of his grey ones but he still stared coldly through her. The next moment she started kissing him, he didn't bother to return it but it didn't felt right. No feelings at all. She was so false, her smell didn't make him loose his mind, her whole occurrence just so wrong to him.

Their kiss hold an eternity or at least it felt as if and he was glad when it was over. "Everything okay with you?" she asked him, worried. "Yeah yeah. Everything is just fine." he underlined the "just" and responded maybe a bit to sarcastic but it seemed that she didn't realise. "Good because I want us to have a very special evening." There was her odd bright smile again. But what was that? A "special" evening? Was that what she said or had he misheard her. Shocked Draco looked for the first time seriously at her. "What did you say?" His voice still full of coldness, but he became curious. "A special evening, it's a surprise." Pansy's eyes were full of hunger. Demonstrative she laid her legs over his, she was satisfied with herself. As she did, Draco saw the Weasley boy giggling with a rather good looking girl, or at least better looking than Pansy. At least Weaslebee was happy he thought.

When he looked around he could see Potter standing near him, looking after his red haired friend, next to him Mudblood Granger who looked kinda sad. Fascinated Draco stared at her, analysing her appearance. Except her messy hair she looked quite good. Well, when you have Pansy Parkinson as a comparison every other girl might look rather good. Certainly he smiled because of his own joke. His stare still lay on her when he realised that she turned her head and glanced at him, too. For a short moment their eyes met and he couldn't get his gaze of her. Something didn't allow it and he was petrified. Her big brown eyes had something soft. When Draco was able to find his conscious back he looked away quickly, his pale cheeks turned into a soft red. This was a very odd situation and he was sure that he wasn't allowed to be fascinated by a muggleborn witch, who also was Potters best friend. With a sigh he shook this thought away and came back into reality.
Pansy on the other hand used the moment to hi-jack him and kissed him again, very passionate. This time though he wasn't that nice to let it happen and pushed her away roughly. His gaze went back to the place where the two Gryffindor's stood just a moment ago but they were gone. Somehow he wished he would have been able to stare at her a bit longer. On the other hand he cursed himself for being really stupid. "Even Malfoy is happy. Harry I'm so hopeless." He was able to hear Hermione's familiar voice but couldn't spot them.

"Honestly Draco, what the fucking hell is your problem?" Pansy's annoyance brought him back again. She really was upset because he pushed her away. He and Blaise looked surprised by her sudden outbreak at her, anger written in her face. Helpless Draco looked at his friend but Blaise just shrugged his shoulders. "I don't get it. You're not the same as always. I just wanted to have a nice time with you and you push me away.." She nearly screamed at him.

"Right." Was just a simple, cold answer from Draco who stared again to the place, where he saw the Gryffindor girl some moments ago. Though he could still hear the high voice of Pansy, who would cost him any time in the future his nerves.

"Fine, I better leave then." she snapped, her dark eyes filled with tears which she tried to hide but failed.

"You should."

Angrily she went off and didn't look back at him. Her ponytail made some funny jumps while she walked away.

He sighed. 'You're so wrong. I'm not happy.'

–

Later that evening Draco went up the astronomy tower to get away from everyone and everything. He still hadn't figured out how to get a bunch of Death Eaters into the castle without anyone noticing. Unutterable pressure lay upon him. Draco wasn't sleeping much, when he was sleeping at all. He didn't ask for this job, he didn't want to do this. But his parents and his own life depended on his success. It was difficult to remember any good feeling or memory. His life became just a farce. Because his father was unable to do as the Dark Lord pleased Draco got punished.

So when he was desperate he came up here. Here, where nobody would see him crying. It became a safe place for him. It also helped that never anyone was up here.

So when he stepped out of the corridor he could see someone sitting right in front of the large, glassless windows, reading a book. With another look he could say, it was Granger sitting there. Well, who else could it be? She was the only one who seemed to dare reading books, apart from himself. For some minutes he stood in the door case, staring at her. Twice at one day. Something must have been wrong here. Granger's dark brown hair waved with the cold night wind in his direction and her smell came into his nostrils. He couldn't describe the aroma but it smelled quite good. Her skin was more colourful, so it looked healthier than his pale skin. A second time this day he was fascinated about himself. He used to hate her, insult her and though he stood still in the door case, staring at a person he shouldn't get involved with. He excused himself of acting like that because he wanted to study Potter's friends, so he could maybe harm him or them easier. Though, something wasn't right. And he knew that he was lying to himself when he thought that this excuse was true.

After a while his mind came back, she hadn't realised that he was there. Yet. Silently he stepped closer. "Hello Granger." he sniffed arrogantly. "Searching for a place to be alone because Weaslebee snogging that bimbo made you jealous?" Of course this was a rhetorical question and he was amused and happy by his sentence. His left eyebrow moved up to underline the said. "What do you want, Malfoy?" she said when she looked up, anger brewing in her. But he just shrugged his shoulders. "Didn't know that's your business." he snapped back.

"As you can see, I'm a bit preoccupied to play your stupid game. So get lost Malfoy." Not very successfully Hermione tried to get back into her book. "You know, this used to be my place. Why don't you just..I don't know - disappear?"

Hermoine's anger rose rapidly. "I didn't know this was YOUR place. But it's big enough, so go somewhere else. I was first." Pure hate was talking out of her. Their eyes met, his cold grey one's with her (at the moment not so warm) brown eyes. There it was again, this odd thing and it really began to irritate him.

"You haven't answered my question." Draco changed the topic, provoked her. "What question?" she asked, still angry and still staring into his eyes. "Are you jealous about Weasley snogging around. She was quite cute. Not that it would be of any interest for me." Hastily he added the last sentence, so it wouldn't come into her mind, that he actually cared about anything that had to do with her.

"I don't think that's your concern Malfoy." she always highlighted his surname to show him how less she liked him.

"Even if, in the end you're still just a filthy mudblood. Who would care about you?"

That hit her right into the face, even though she knew nothing good would come out of his mouth. Angrily she slammed her book close and stood up, walked straight to him and stopped right in front of him. Her eyes fixated his again but he couldn't stand her gaze for long. He knew he had insulted her too much, so he looked away. "How dare you!" she nearly screamed. In the next moment he felt her hand hitting his precious face. Pain ran through it, he was shocked, his mouth open he looked where Granger stood the moment before. Now she was gone, the pain stayed. A wave of her perfume made its way into his nose.

Slowly he sat down at the place were she sat some minutes ago. He felt that he was sorry about calling her a "filthy mudblood". Mechanically his left hand moved to the place where her hand hit him, it was warm and hurting.

"Fascinating." he said to himself, almost in a trance. For a long time he looked down into the Forbidden Forest, his mind back to his Death Eater problem, which he nearly forgot about. About midnight he went back to his common room with the intention to sleep.