Title: Claim
Pairing: Perry Cox/John Dorian
Prompt: 01: Beginnings
Word Count: 438
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: None
Warnings: angst, language, slash
Authors Notes: First in a mini series. Plaything and Break-Up follow.

The first time Dr. Cox kissed me, it was hard, rough, and demanding, almost a claim of ownership. But really, he didn't need to claim me, because I was already his. Had been for a while too, he just hadn't known it at the time. It was true though, I belonged to him already in heart and soul, all the kiss did was give my body to him as well.

There were only two small problems with me getting together with Dr. Cox. He had all of me, and all it seemed he was willing to give me was his body. Don't get me wrong, he has a great body, all muscle-y and hard, but I wanted more. All I'd get were quick gropes in closets, heated looks in the hallways, and if I was lucky, a drunken fuck that would end with him kicking me out of his apartment when he was finished. I learnt that the hard way when after our first time I found myself standing naked outside his door, clutching the clothes I'd caught as he'd thrown them at me.

The second problem was his absolute refusal to let me tell anybody about us, not even Turk, and I tell Turk everything. The one time I brought up telling people, boy did Dr. Cox let me have it. He ranted for what had to be at least twenty minutes, and some of the insults still make me blush if I think about it. So why do I stay? Why do I keep coming back for more when I know he's just going to toss me aside when someone better comes along? Because at some point I fell in love, and like an addict I keep coming back for more, even though I know it's not good for me.

Yet sometimes, mostly when I manage to get him to bring me back to his apartment to have sex, he'll whisper things. Mostly nonsense, but I swear sometimes I can hear the endearments, can almost be certain that the words he mutters into my stomach or back are 'I love you'. But that can't be right, and I have to keep telling myself that, so that I'm not so disappointed every time when he contradicts my suspicions by throwing me out.

I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to stand this 'almost relationship' that we have. I try not to think about it too much, since actually thinking about the way Dr. Cox treats me hurts. I don't know how much more I can take of being stuck between having a relationship, and being nothing more then a plaything to him.