Can't tell you how much I loved Sex & Violence. I'm scared for the boys, but I'm so intrigued at where Kripke & Co. are going to take this journey I can hardly wait for March. Of course, me being who I am, I had to add my own little touch to the episode, so here is my tag, hopefully still playing on the emotions obvious as they cut to black.
The Beginning of the End
"So, are we good?"
Dean snorted a soft laugh. Back at the river, he'd assured his brother everything was okay. He wasn't stupid enough to think that either of them actually believed that, though. They were so far from good it was scary.
Dean was pretty sure that if Bobby hadn't come along when he did, he would've buried that axe in his brother's head. He would've killed Sam – something he'd never believed himself capable of. And the kicker was, he couldn't blame it 100% on the siren's spell.
He was so damned mad.
At Sam.
At Ruby.
At himself.
At the whole goddamned world for this pathetically fucked up life.
How the hell did it ever get to this anyway?
"You're weak. I'm a better hunter than you. I'm stronger, smarter… I can kill demons you're too scared to go after."
It was still crap.
Dean had seen his share of demons… on earth and in the pit. The one thing he'd learned was that they were predictable. And if anything remained true, it was that demon's lie. They couldn't be trusted – even if they seemed to be helping.
Sam thought Dean was weak? Who was the one consorting with a fucking demon? Who was the one turning his back on everything Dad had ever taught them? Who was the one using some freaky ass powers that he knew – absolutely, positively knew – came from a demonic source?
Who was the one lying to the one person who'd given up everything for him?
Dean blinked as the road disappeared under the wheels of the Impala, swallowing hard as he remembered the look in his brother's eyes as he taunted him about his memories of hell.
Hell.
Like Sam had a fucking clue what that was like.
The chirping of Sam's cell phone broke the heavy silence inside the car. Sam reached into his pocket and pulled the device out, staring at the read-out.
Dean glanced sideways, the look on Sam's face telling him who was calling without having to ask.
"You gonna answer that?"
Sam turned his head, his eyes meeting Dean's for a moment before dropping back to the phone. He quickly hit a button, silencing the ring before replacing the device back into his pocket.
"No."
A surge of anger surfaced, twisting his chest into a knot at the thought of that black-eyed skank having her hooks in his brother. Not answering her calls now was a little like locking the barn door after the horse had escaped. The damage was done, and Dean could see no way of fixing the mess they were in.
Maybe he'd been better off not knowing. Maybe he still would've been able to delude himself into believing that Sam was still the little brother he'd always known. That they were still fighting the same fight. That they still had a chance in hell of winning.
But that illusion was gone. Stripped away by a different kind of monster that had little or no stake in the war they'd found themselves in. The siren had simply been surviving as it always had. It didn't care about good or evil, it was simply a monster doing what it was born to do.
And it had inadvertently brought to the surface the ugly truth of what they'd become.
Dean couldn't help but think it was the beginning of the end.
A faded sign on the side of the road announced the turn off for 'The Pit' and Dean chuffed another laugh, turning the wheel and steering the Impala into the gravel parking lot of the run down bar.
It seemed like an appropriate place for him to drown his anger.
Sliding to a stop, he shifted into park and cut the engine, pulling the keys from the ignition as he eyed the dump of a tavern. The soda Bobby had handed him was still perched between his legs, only half gone and probably warm by now. He was thirsty, but the caffeine infused cola wasn't really going to cut it. He needed something a hell of a lot stronger… something that could help him numb the anger and resentment he'd been trying to smother for the last fifty miles.
"Dude, it's barely 11:00. A little early for lunch, don't ya think?"
Dean shrugged but didn't bother to look across the seat as he pushed the door open. "It's Happy Hour somewhere, Sam."
He quickly stepped out of the car and tossed the bottle against the gravel, the slamming of the door rocking the big Chevy from the force. He didn't wait for his brother to join him, simply stalked across the lot and pushed through the heavy wooden door, looking forward to the call of the alcohol's welcomed escape.
Snsnsnsnsn
Sam's eyes tracked his brother until he disappeared through the door of the bar. Leaning his head back against the seat, he sighed heavily, beating a fist against the padded door of the Impala.
"Shit!"
The muffled sound of his cell phone cut through the silence of the car and he pulled it from his pocket, thumbing the receive button without bothering to look at the display.
"What?"
"Nice, Sam," Ruby's voice purred over the line. "Hello to you, too."
"Sorry," Sam sighed again, this time closing his eyes and forcing his frustration back. "It's just… it's been a real crappy day."
"Don't tell me, you're brother is being a pain in the ass."
Sam was kind of relieved to feel the small flare of resentment at the insinuation. "Actually, my brother is fine. It's me that's been the ass." Ruby chuckled and Sam found himself cringing even more. "Look, Ruby, what is it? I'm kind of not in the mood –"
"Then I'll skip the foreplay," the demon quipped. "I think I've got a line of Lillith."
Sam sat up, his eyes wide at the possibility. "Where?"
"Dubuque, Iowa."
Sam's breath caught in his throat. "I'm only a few miles from there."
"I know. Pretty convenient, huh?"
Sam swallowed, his eye straying to the closed door his brother had disappeared through. "You think she knows we're here?"
He could almost hear the shrug over the phone. "I don't know, Sam. Just seems like a hell of a coincidence she'd pop up after all this time under the radar and right where you and your brother are. I just don't believe we're that lucky."
"No," Sam had to agree. "I doubt if luck has much to do with it." He took a deep breath and released it in an attempt to settle his excitement. "Where are you?"
"Not far."
Sam nodded, somehow already knowing the demon was close. "I'm at a dive bar called 'The Pit'," he snorted a laugh, just now getting the joke of his brother's choice of watering holes. "Meet me here."
"What about Dean?"
Sam hesitated. What about Dean? Would his brother understand that this could be the chance they'd been waiting for? Would he understand that finding Lillith was the only way they could truly end this?
Sam doubted it. His stomach clenched as he thought of the words he'd hurled at his brother while under the siren's spell. Were they true? Did he actually believe Dean was weak?
Sam had always believed his brother was the strongest person he'd ever known. But Hell had changed him. And although Sam still needed his brother to believe in him, he couldn't take the chance that Dean would try to stop him. This was something he had to do himself. Dean would probably end up hating him for it… if he didn't hate him already.
"Dean has nothing to do with this," he said, his voice tight with emotion. "He can't help us."
"I'll be there in twenty minutes."
Sam thumbed the phone off and leaned back against the familiar leather of the Impala. Dean would never forgive him for what he was about to do. He'd probably never forgive him for a lot of things. Sam couldn't help but regret what their lives had become. He'd been so relieved to have his brother back in his life… but the path he'd started on while Dean was in Hell was one he had to travel alone.
For the first time, Dean couldn't protect him.
And Sam couldn't let him try.
End
Yeah, I know, kind of left it up in the air. But I have no idea where Kripke is headed and I don't want to ruin anything with assumptions, so I'll leave it there… unless I think of something spectacular… you never know!