Some Random: Hey creepy peoples! Just kidding! Here's another story from the Random and yes, it's a crazy one! Here's the lowdown, I don't own Yugioh, or Paris Hilton. Also, Yami Marik, Yami Bakura and Yami all have their own bodies. Enough of my chatter! Let's do this!
Chapter One - Victim Number One...Malik...
It was a normal everyday happy day...until...until Solomon decided to wreck havoc once more. In the worst possible way...exposing secrets...
Solomon had had enough. Everyone always abused him, called him fat, ugly and OLD. It was time for them to pay...
But who to start with? The one with the most embarrassing secret...the one whose secret needed to be exposed the most...Malik...
Malik was happily walking along the road, humming a happy song, when he felt his pocket vibrate...no...it's not something sus...it was his mobile. Taking it out, he placed the receiver to his ear.
"Hello?"
"I know your secret." said a husky voice, an old husky voice. Malik could swear he could smell the old man from right where he was standing and the Moto house was a long way away.
"What do you mean, "I know your secret", old man!" screamed Malik into the phone, "This isn't some lame movie, like that "I know what you did last summer" one!"
"Be afraid, be very afraid. I know your secret and I know what you did last summer!" said the voice, and Malik heard insane laughter follow it.
"Bakura, is this some prank? Pretending to be the old fart so that you can tease me about my secret, which only you know. It ain't gonna work."
"What? Oh, damn. Oh well, I tried. Hey, you wanna come over?"
"Uh, I don't know. I think I'm busy..."
"Are you doing what I think you're going to be busy doing?"
"Uh...maybe..." On the other end, Bakura rolled his eyes.
"Well, I'll leave you to that." Bakura said something else, but Malik was too busy looking at the piece of paper sitting on the ground at his feet. There was one thing written on it and one thing only...
I KNOW YOUR SECRET!!!!
"Hey Bakura."
"Yeah, Malik?"
"Did you happen to leave a note near me saying "I know your secret" in big red block capitals?"
"Nope. That's not mine. Anyway, I'll catch you later."
"See ya Bakura." Malik hung up the phone and picked up the note.
"Hm. Who could have written this? If it wasn't Bakura, who else could it be? I mean, no one else knows my secret...but if this person knows my secret..." Malik's eyes widened.
"NO! NOT PARIS!!!!!!!!!!!" he screamed and ran back to his house as fast as he could. Bursting into his room, he saw that all his pictures had been stolen.
"NO!!!!!! PARIS!!!!!!!!" Malik fell to his knees on the ground, screaming the name of his beloved. Though the feeling was only one sided...
Thinking hard, Malik remembered what he was going to do. And then he thought the most horribliest (is that even a word?) of thoughts. What if the old man...oh no...he had to get to Paris.
Meanwhile...
Miss Hilton was enjoying a relaxing day at her apartment, with a glass of expensive champagne when suddenly something out in the distance caught her eye. Looking carefully at it, she tried to determine its meaning.
"I...know...who...lick...likes...to...watch...you. I...know...who...lives...no, loves...you." she said, reading the sign. A puzzled look came onto Paris's face.
"What?" Suddenly the phone rang but Paris let her answering machine take it. She didn't feel like talking to anyone on the phone at the moment. But then, the old sounding voice that came from the speaker made her jump.
"I know…somebody's…secret…that involves…you…"
"PARIS NO!!!!!!!!!!!" she heard somebody scream and suddenly Malik came flying through the window. Paris screamed. Malik screamed. The old man on the phone screamed.
"What are we screaming for?" asked Malik, once it stopped. Paris just screamed again.
"No Paris! Don't do this! I love you!" shouted Malik as he was dragged away by the security. The paparazzi watched eagerly, taking as many pictures as possible. Inadvertently exposing Malik's secret to the world…
Down in his lair, Solomon laughed evilly and rubbed his hands together.
"One down, many more to go."
"Uh Grandpa…what are you doing in the cupboard? Isn't it a little cramped in there?" Yugi's voice came from outside the cupboard.
"Just looking for the broom, to sweep the game shop…" said Solomon, sheepishly.
"Okay Gramps."
Once he was sure Yugi was gone, Solomon laughed evilly once more.
Some Random: Okay…kinda short…kinda stupid…but you all know that you love me…just kidding…anyway…please review…or you'll find all your beloved shoes missing…as I will have eaten them…but only if you don't review….I love being threatening…
Malik: You call those threats? They're the stupidest things I've ever heard.
Some Random: What would you know? I bet you don't know more than I do…
Malik: Well…
Some Random: Oh, shut up.