DISCLAIMER: I don't own Inuyasha, character or story-wise, nor do I own the song "In My Life". Inuyasha and all related characters are owned by their creator, Rumiko Takahashi and affiliates; the song "In My Life is owned by singer/songwriter Bette Midler and affiliates. This story, however, is owned by me. It is purely a work of fiction. I am receiving no $$$ for this.
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Reflection
Inspired by the song In My Life, by Bette Midler
From the movie soundtrack, "For The Boys", © 1991
Sitting under the Goshinboku one day, Kagome writes in her journal, reflecting on what has transpired for the last three years.
Mid-June: year 2008. 21st century. Twenty-first century… that seems so strange to write down, but I feel it's important. Like it should be noted as an important date in history.
Life in the modern era seems changed, somehow. I can't really describe it, but I know this: this life now, it isn't how it's supposed to be…
The timing of the events seem 'off' to me, but from what Mama told me, the Bone Eater's Well 'disappeared', then reappeared in a pillar of light three days later. I had been missing for three days. It has been three years since then, when I returned through the Well with Inuyasha. Mama, Souta, Jii-chan, my three school mates were there, waiting for me, and all very worried. When I stepped out of the Well and into the embrace of Mama, I was so glad to be home. Glad that it was finally over, that Naraku was dead, and the Shikon no Tama was no more. I cried. I cried like I had never done so in my life; I was so happy.
"Inuyasha saved me," I said as I turned to look at him. I parted slightly from Mama's arms to thank him, but what happened next I might never fully understand. There was a great rumble from the pit of the Well, and in another burst of brilliance, Inuyasha disappeared. I ran to the edge of the Well, frantically calling out after him, but the Well had sealed itself. Since then, it has no longer connected to the Feudal Era. Almost as if it wants me to forget, forget about where I was, when I was. Forget about my life that I had started there…
She gathered her journal and stood up, walking from the ancient tree towards the Well Shrine, her mind recalling just how many steps it was from Goshinboku to the Well's edge. She had counted it so many times in the past that it had become ingrained within her mind. She stopped at the stairs leading up to the Shrine's doors, and looked around.
"Over there, to the right, where my house now stands and down the hill a ways is where the village once was. I can still see the path, though it's overgrown with plants and changed a little…"
There are places I remember,
All my life, though some have changed.
Some forever, not for better,
And some have gone, and some remain.
Turning to her left slightly, another scene played in her mind. Though where now stood the red entrance gate that marked their home from the roadway at the top of this hill, she remembered it differently. A small shiver ran down her spine.
"This is where we defeated Naraku; Sango, Miroku, Shippou, Kirara, Kaede, Inuyasha and I. Further down this hill, across the roadway that didn't exist back then, and up to the top of the next hill over there is where we parted company with a few others who had joined us. A… man? No, a youkai, a youkai with eyes as blue as the sky, and his two companions… also a woman. A woman, with strong spiritual powers, who gave her life to save us,"
All these places have their moments,
With lovers and friends I still can't recall.
Some are dead and some are living,
In my life I love them all.
Though Kagome couldn't recall their names, she knew that she had cared for them like family. The blue-eyed youkai gave her feelings that reminded her of Hojo, funny how that was. The feelings about the woman were hard to sort out, like the relationship was very strained and tense, and yet somehow, Kagome felt a kinship with her. Like it was a sisterhood of sorts. Kagome remembered then; this woman was like her. She also had loved Inuyasha.
Inuyasha…
But of all these friends and lovers,
There is no one compares with you.
And these memories lose their meaning,
When I think of love as something new.
Kagome stepped up the stairs leading to the Shrine's doors. Setting her journal aside, she placed her hands apprehensively upon the doors. Should I? Do I dare to try, to see if the Well has opened?
She slid open the doors and descended the inside stairs to the Well's edge. Peering down into the darkness, something from within her reached out for that feeling—a familiar tug, the magic—that once grabbed hold of her center and gently pulled her back through time. But no such reaction came.
She sighed. The reason the Well won't connect… is probably because of my feelings. When the Bone Eater's Well disappeared, and I was plunged into that darkness, I was so scared and sad. But I didn't know, that I had been in the darkness for three days. That made Mama, Jii-chan, and Souta scared and sad as well. I felt terrible, and was so happy to return home. And then the Well closed.
"Inuyasha, I've thought about you all the time since then."
She placed her hand upon the wooden edge, and look closer inside. Her mind replayed images like flashes of lightning of what had transpired back in the past. The reason she went to the Feudal Era. The reason the Shikon no Tama had disappeared and Well stopped connecting. What she had to do was done, and now she was forever in her—this world… a world without Inuyasha. Her heart grew heavy with longing as she closed her eyes. Inuyasha, I want to be with you.
Though I know I'll never ever lose affection,
For people and things that went before,
I know I'll often stop and think about them,
In my life I love you more.
The wood beneath her hand gave a slight creak, and a light breeze passed across her face. Kagome snapped open her eyes, and peered into the depths once more. Was that…? Did it…?
"Kagome," the soft sound of her mother's voice eased her tensed body and mind. "What's wrong?"
"Mama…"
Her mother came inside the Well Shrine, comfortingly encircling her daughter in her arm. As they stood together, peering into the darkness, something magical happened, and Kagome's heart leapt. The sky… the Well has reopened!
She took a deep breath. "Mama, I'm…"
"Kagome…" Her mother stopped her mid-sentence, and turned to face her daughter. Kagome saw the look of concern on her mother's face, but her eyes displayed a different meaning. For the few moments that passed between them, Kagome understood the feelings within her mother's heart that her lips could not convey: It's okay, I understand.
They hugged each other for what could be their last moment together as small trails of tears descended down each of their cheeks. Kagome parted from her mother's embrace, giving her a proud smile, and stepped over the Well's edge to vanish for the last time.
XxXxX
Late June: year approximately 1550, or so. 16th century.
"Ugh, darn this brush!" A blob of black liquid splattered from its horse-haired tipped prison, staining the edge of Kagome's miko robes. She quickly grabbed a spare piece of parchment and pressed it to the ink blob, hoping for it to absorb.
Beside her, Inuyasha cracked an eye open from under a shady spot beneath the tree. "Oi, what are you doing? You've been sitting under this ancient tree for the past three days, doing nothing but grumbling at those scrolls and the ink stone! What gives?"
"Inuyasha", Kagome smiled, "I just had the notion to write my feelings down. I call it a journal, but I think I might never get used to these brushes and the mess the ink can make," She shook out the edge of her sleeve, judging the offending stain to be not that bad. "Well, Miroku told me that even he had a hard time when first learning to write with brushes. It truly is… er, will be, a dying art."
"Huh, y'think so? You might be better off writing something else that is shorter," He grasped the end of her sleeve and held it up. "Unless you want to wear a set of Miroku's old robes instead."
She giggled, and he resumed his napping posture. She watched him a few moments until the sounds of his soft snores could be heard. As the late afternoon sun played in the leaves overhead, Kagome nibbled on the brush handle's end, thinking of her mother, her brother and grandfather, and of the life she left behind. She missed them terribly, and wondered, If maybe, just maybe… oh! I know!
She dipped the brush into the pool on the ink stone, and set the tip once again to the parchment.
Dear Mama,
Though I know I'll never ever lose affection,
For people and things that went before,
I know I'll often stop and think of them,
But in my life I loved you more.
I love you more.
I love you more.
~fin~
End note: This story was originally posted to the Live Journal community "inusongfics", Week 17- prompt "Reminisce" on April 7th, 2008.
Word count: 1530.