Disclaimer: I don't own House M.D or any of the show's characters!! But I do totally LOVE it, so yea, thus it mutated into a fanfiction!
How to care for Gregory House
"Please don't sneeze on my files"
"I-I I-" House started to say, but his sneezes stopped him from even completing the sentence. Luckily House seemed to be in an accommodating mood today, no sneezing on top of Wilson's patient files. "Thank you, House" Wilson said earnestly, surprised by the act of… normalcy from his friend.
"Hay fever?" Wilson asked, handing a tissue over. "Wow, won the Pulitzer Prize yet?" House snapped and blew his nose; he sat down on the chair opposite Wilson. "I'm sure my un-written biography leaked out on the internet and was published by the online Penguin Producers" Wilson countered sarcastically and closed the file he was browsing through with a snap.
"Interesting…. But it's not hay f-f-fever" House said and rested his head on top of the backrest of the chair. He lazily wiped his nose with the spare tissue. Wilson rubbed the back of his neck, "How did you manage to catch a cold in spring?" he asked exasperatedly. "Statistics show-" House started, but Wilson held up his hand. "-Please, not with the numbers again" Wilson said.
The weather outside was actually far from being an incubus of colds or even flu. Cool, but not cold weather. The sun shines daily, few clouds and no rain bouts or storms. No reason for a healthy person to get sick at all.
"I'll FedEx you some MedLemon" Wilson said and moved on to the next file. House sneezed again and bumped his head on the rest, "… Ooowwwuuucchhh" he moaned, not bothering to sit up. "You can always ask Cuddy for the day off" Wilson suggested, briefly looking up.
His friend just sniffed loudly, "MedLemon… took two doses already" House said, "Can't have any more dangerous substances today, I might pass out". "Cuddy isn't a…. " Wilson started, but stopped mid-sentence. He knew what House would say to that. "-Dangerous substance? Yes, she can castrate you with one hand behind tied her back… hopefully with a silk scarf" House said nasally, yes, but still with a grin.
After a brief knock, the door opened, "Is Doctor… whoa-" Chase started, but stopped as soon as he saw House he stopped. The red puffy eyes, the snotty nose, flushed cheeks and pale face was definitely a shocker for the young Australian doctor.
"Lost a puppy, House?" Cameron asked, trying to muffle a growing smile. "Yeah, he's cute, short, barks a lot and I call him 'Foreman'" House said with a roll of his eyes, "… Are you here for a reason or are you here to frisk me?". Cameron frowned, "Frisk you, of course" she said and handed House a case file, "… Patient's speaking Chinese". Wilson's eyebrow lifted. House pulled a face, "A bit discriminating…" he said. "… The patient doesn't know Chinese" she said, grinning a bit, "Doesn't that just poke your interest?". She left without another word. Wilson just shrugged. House threw the file on the floor.
"You're not going to leap out of your chair, biopsy the patient's frontal lobe or something?" Wilson asked, highlighting a segment of the file he was browsing through. House lazily looked over to the file on the floor, "Patient won't run away. That's so great about Hospital security, runaways don't get far" he said and wiped his nose again, "… and we can always reign in our resident Australian doctor for roping in the crazies". Wilson didn't even bother to look up. He knew House would only find that as the fuel on the fire. The cherry on the ice-cream.
"House…" Wilson said with a relenting tone; rummaging through his desk drawer. He closed the drawer and held out a pill bottle towards his best friend, "Take a couple of these… not all of it" Wilson said and shook the bottle side-to-side. House snatched the bottle away, "Fine, only if you would stop shaking that damned thing" he snapped, "What is this?".
Wilson stood up, walked over to the basin in the adjacent washroom and returned with a washcloth, "It'll help" is all Wilson said. He slapped the cloth on House's forehead, "and this will too… just … rest for a while" the oncologist advised softly. House's eyelids drooped in relief; "Fine" he reluctantly said and took two of the tablets. He put the pill bottle on the desk. If anyone else in the world would be in that room, they would have fainted. Getting Gregory House to take medication… or anything without so much as a fight to know its contents? A miracle in its own right.
"Thank you… Wilson" House said and closed his eyes.
"Don't fall asleep here, I've got a patient coming in half an hour" Wilson said, smiling at the fact that his friend was already feeling a bit better. He helped House up, keeping a hold on the washcloth on his forehead.
Both friends slowly headed to the Diagnostic Department and into his office. They reached the lounge chair in House's office. House limped the rest of the way over to the chair and sat down, "If you don't mind, I'll be taking my mid-morning nap and morphine drip right away, nurse" he muttered, opening the washcloth entirely and dropping it over his face. "Right away, oh infectious one" Wilson said sarcastically with a chuckle.
Please R & R :D