Forbidden
Prologue~
The kits were an accident. He was a mistake. But it happened. I made these choices. I can only blame myself.
Now, as I scavenge for my brood, these small lives, so dependent on me, I feel so helpless and yet so powerful at the same time. Why don't I just abandon these tiny things and go back to my Clan; my kin, my friends, all the ones I love. If I were still there, my Clan mates would hunt for me; I would never go hungry and my kits would have a medicine cat and plenty of playmates. But I know I can never go back. With the shame and the dishonor I have brought, it would be the end of me. The cats I've known my whole life, I bet they couldn't even stand to look at me.
I know I've made some mistakes, but could they forgive me? I can't even forgive myself for the things I've done. Even though they're not all against the Warrior Code, they go against the unspoken and sometimes stronger moral code.
My mentor said I had huge promise, my friends said I was really talented, and, above all, my parents said that someday, I could even become [I]leader[/I] if I had enough ambition. What do they think of me now? Probably that I was just some fox-heart that ran away in the face of battle.
If I had the chance to redo it all, I would.
Chapter 1~
"ThunderClan, two of our kits have reached apprenticing age, and I'm sure you've been waiting rather impatiently!" Emberstar's friendly voice rang out, filling the sandy hollow and the ears of our anxious Clan. With dignity, he recited the ancient ritual. Briarfur was made Applepaw's mentor.
I squirmed in my place as my red/gold sister was made an apprentice.
"Darkkit!"
Walking with a little skip, I made my way through the pelts of my Clan.
"Darkkit, you have reached the age of six moons, and it is time for you to be apprenticed. From this day on, until you receive your warrior name, you will be known as Darkpaw. Pineclaw will be your mentor. Pineclaw, I hope you will pass on your wit and courage and all you know to Darkpaw."
Nervously, I reached my head forward to touch noses with the huge black tom. I was so happy to have the deputy as my mentor! Pineclaw was by far the strongest cat in the Clan.
As I went to stand between my shy sister and new mentor, the Clan burst out in a chorus of
"Applepaw! Darkpaw! Applepaw! Darkpaw!"
It seemed impossible to control my enthusiasm. Nudging Applepaw, we scampered over to our mom, Dawnfeather, and our dad, Emberstar.
"My kits! You're going to make such brave, skilled warriors." She meowed, her green eyes shining with pride. Emberstar nodded in agreement.
Then the two ginger cats walked away, into the cave under High Rock.
I looked at Applepaw.
"I can't believe we're apprentices!" I mewed, my fur prickling with excitement.
She nodded. My sister had always been more reserved, taking after our father.
"Oh come on!" I added, cuffing her over the ear gently, "You have to be proud!"
"Well… of course I am!" Applepaw finally broke through her shell.
Rolling my eyes, I pulled her over to the other apprentices who were sitting by their den. Honeypaw and Rockpaw, circled us enthusiastically. They had only had their apprentice ceremony a few moons ago, so they had shared the nursery with us. Honeypaw ushered Applepaw into the den and explained the way the nests worked and where we would sleep.
"I'm so happy we get to share a den again Applepaw!" Her voice was shrill and perky, so that she sounded like a frightened mouse.
The sun was setting as my sister and I padded to the apprentice den. In the bright, dying green-leaf sun, her pelt shone like autumn light. Her deep green eyes were solemn and friendly. I saw the way Rockpaw looked at her. All the toms loved Applepaw. Even the warriors complimented her on the looks she had inherited from our mother. I didn't resemble my family much, with my black pelt and orange markings. Even my eyes, amber in color, had nothing to do with any of my ginger furred, green-eyed kin. That didn't bother me too much though; only a mouse-brain would think that the pelt made the warrior.
I woke as the dawn patrol went out.
Applepaw appeared in front of me.
"I have to go see the territory, but I wanted to show you something first. Look at this!" Applepaw called me over to her nest.
Lining the fresh bedding were the downy feathers of an owl.
"He must've gone all the way to the Owl Tree for these! Oh, Rockpaw's so brave…" She continued, a loving look in her eyes as she nosed them around.
I rolled my eyes and purred weakly, but I was secretly jealous. Why didn't any cat do that for me?
After she left, I lay back down, but I felt so stiff. Heaving myself up, I padded softly out into the bright afternoon sun. It felt so good, and I stood outside the den, letting my pelt soak in the warmth. Movement in the corner of my half closed eyes brought me back to the camp. Briarfur came over to me.
"What are you doing? Shouldn't you be out learning the boundaries? Oh right, Pineclaw told me to tell you he can't show you around today. You'll see the territory tomorrow. What are you going to do today? Anything? Hm. You always were a quiet kit. Unlike your sister. So sociable. Oh well, Pineclaw's not exactly chatty either. Oh! My patrol just left!"
With that, she ran off to where Applepaw and the rest of her patrol were waiting.
Next to come into my line of vision was Autumndapple, our medicine cat. She was a beautiful dark ginger she-cat, with black dapples that complimented her amber eyes. Every cat in the clan said the only reason she became a medicine cat was because all the toms were in love with her; except the one she was in love with. He died in battle as an apprentice. So she switched from a warrior apprenticeship to train as a medicine cat. I respect her; she has a strong connection with Starclan. Although maybe that's only because she can visit her lost lover…
I saw her walking towards Emberstar's den.
"Emberstar? Emberstar!"
My father's head appeared in the opening beneath High Rock. The two cats exchanged a look and I knew it was something serious. Autumndapple whisked into his den and the lichen fell back in place.
Trying not to draw the attention of the warriors sharing tongues in the clearing, I shuffled behind High Rock. There was a narrow opening hidden under some dead leaves. As kits, Applepaw and I had dug a small cave beside our father's den. We used to listen to all his conversations with other warriors. We hadn't used it in a while, because it was so tiny, but I managed to squeeze in.
Crouching in the sand, I listened for Emberstar and Autumndapple's voices.
"Emberstar," The medicine cat's voice sounded tense and worried, "Starclan has shared a prophecy with me."